A long silence indicated that he wasn’t planning on saying any more. I took exception to that. “Care to elaborate?”
“Nope.”
“Too fucking bad.” I glanced at Rem and then Ram. “You hear anything I haven’t?”
They both shook their heads. “No, he wouldn’t talk about it till you got here,” Rem said.
“Well, I’m here, so talk.”
“We were nineteen when we all thought we’d come down to Seattle and live it up. Till then, our idea of the big city was Anchorage or Fairbanks. Seattle was…big time, you know? Me, Liam, Lena, and Caitlin.”
“Caitlin?” Rem asked.
“My girlfriend at the time.” He scratched his head. “She was—I liked her. A lot. But she was camouflage, you know?”
“Because you were in love with Lena?” Ram asked.
He nodded. “Bad. But she was with Liam. I thought I could handle it, I thought I was hiding it.”
I sighed. “Not so much, huh?”
“Nope. We all got kinda trashed over at a park on the sound. I ended up talking to Lena, and Liam was talking to Caitlin. Not doin’ nothing, just talking. And she just, outta the blue she looked at me and said, ‘Lucas, I know you’re in love with me.’” He paused a moment. “I didn’t even bother denying it. Didn’t know what to say. What was there to say? That was…that was the start of everything blowing up between Liam and me.”
“So you went back to the park?” I guessed.
He nodded. “Yep. Felt like the day it happened.” Dad’s voice was tight, thick. “It’s been forty years since I’ve seen her. She’s been in her grave almost fifteen. But it still fuckin’ hurts as bad as ever.”
I stared at him. “Jesus, Dad. You really had it bad for her.”
“You don’t know what Lena was like.” He ducked his head. “Liam deserved her, though. He was…well, he was always getting me outta trouble.” He grinned at me. “Like Rem and Ram are always getting you outta trouble. You’re too much like me.”
“The hell I am.” But I grinned when I said it.
“Yeah, Lena was…one of a kind. I tried like hell to get over her. Tried everything. Nothing worked. Spent my whole goddamn life trying to outrun and outdrink the ghost of that woman. Never could. I sat in that park and heard her telling me I was her best friend, and she’d always love me like a best friend, but she’d always love Liam as more than a friend in a way she couldn’t with me. And that she was sorry, and she didn’t want to hurt me.”
“Ouch,” Rem said, wincing.
“Yeah, fuckin’ ouch.” Dad was lost in the pain. “I went out, bought a half gallon of my ol’ buddy Jim Beam, and got fucked.”
I stared at him. “Jesus, Dad. A half gallon?”
He stared at me hard. “Don’t tell me you’ve never done it.”
I winced, thinking back to Ketchikan. “No, I have. But I’m not an alcoholic.”
“And you’ve never lived your entire goddamn life with your fuckin’ heart torn to shreds without hope of it ever gettin’ fixed.”
“I’m sorry you’ve gone through that, Dad,” I said. “I had no idea.”
“None of us did,” Ram said.
“No shit—I wanted it that way. I was a shitty dad to you three, but I’ve always loved you.” He seemed embarrassingly close to tears, and none of us knew how to handle it. “I just been shitty at it.”
“Dad, goddammit,” I rubbed my face again. “Did you hurt anyone else, or just yourself?”
He swelled with anger at the accusation, but quickly deflated. “No. Just myself. Going around a curve in the middle of nowhere, lost control, jackknifed, rolled the whole business down a ditch. Woke up here.”
“What were you doing up here?” Rem asked.
He shrugged, picking at the blanket again. “I was thinking of trying to make my way north.”
The boys and I traded glances. “How far north?” I asked.
He shrugged again. “I dunno. Hadn’t thought about it. Just…north. Facing my demons, you know? Clearly, that wasn’t a good plan.” He glared at us each in turn. “Woulda been fine if you’d left me well enough alone in Oklahoma.”
“You’d be dead of another heart attack, or cirrhosis, or some other shit,” Ram said. “And you fuckin’ know it.”
He growled. “The fuck you know about it?”
I glanced at my brothers, and then at Dad. “I think you should come up to Ketchikan with us. You’ll need time to heal, and you can’t do it alone, and we sure as fuck aren’t living in Seattle.”
“Rome?” Ram asked. “We don’t really even have our own shit straightened in Ketchikan.”
“We’ll figure it out,” I snapped.
Dad looked about ready to pop. “I ain’t goin’ back there. No fuckin’ way.”
“Dad—there’s no real choice.” Remington was trying to play peacemaker. “We own property up there now, and you’re a mess and you need help.”
“All’a you get the fuck out.” Dad picked a cup of ice off the table and threw it at me, bonking the cup off my head and spraying ice everywhere. “Get the fuck out. I gotta think and I can’t do it with you assholes using all the oxygen.”
Remington was the first to leave, followed by Ramsey. I hesitated, halfway out the door. “Dad—”
He threw an entire tray of half-eaten food at me. “Fuck off, boy, if you know what’s good for you.”
I dodged the tray and ducked out, leaving the mess for someone else to clean up. Ramsey and Remington were halfway down the hallway toward the waiting room, and I followed them.
Upset, pissed, and all over the place, I barely saw the waiting room. I just plopped into the nearest empty chair and bent forward, burying my face in my hands. It was the middle of the night and there was no one around. I was glad for the quiet; I needed to get my shit together and process everything that had happened in the last twelve hours.
Seeing that I was ignoring them, Rem and Ramsay mumbled something about going to find a coffee and left me alone with my thoughts.
I didn’t see her, hear her, or even smell her—all I knew was one second I was wallowing in my own issues, and the next I was being pushed upright by soft, warm hands. Those same hands threaded fingers through mine, and then her weight was settling onto my lap and her face was burying into my throat. Her presence was all around, everywhere. She was everything.
I could only breathe in her scent and absorb her warmth, and wonder at my good fortune. She was exactly who I needed in this moment.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Kitten?”
“I’m your girlfriend, you big dummy.” She reared back and gazed up at me with her big brown eyes. “Just because you freaked out and acted like an idiot doesn’t mean I’m not going to come support you.”
I blinked hard. “Jesus. After that way I left I don’t deserve this kinda treatment, sweetheart.”
She patted my cheek, nuzzling into my neck. “That’s the thing about relationships, Rome—what we deserve doesn’t enter into it. I decide what you deserve, not you.”
“I was an asshole.”
“Yes, you were. Kind of your thing.”
Kitty tugged on my hair. “But maybe I can help you with that. And you don’t have to sprinkle every sentence with half a dozen curse words, either.”
She giggled in my ear, and that giggle went straight to my cock for some reason. “Remember how I reward you when you’re nice, Roman?”
“Better be careful, Kitten, or you’ll find yourself bent over a hospital bed.”
She gazed up at me, bold, meeting my challenge. “You make these threats like you think it’s not exactly what I want, Roman.”
I glanced down at Kitty. “Be honest for a minute. Why are you here after the way I left?”
She smiled. “Roman, you don’t get it? This is how it works. This is what it means to be in a relationship. I knew why you left the way you did. You’re worried about your dad and don’t know how to show it, and you’re afraid of mess
ing up being in a relationship with me, so you just say screw it and sabotage yourself by being a butthead.”
“You barely know me, Kitten. How do you know that much about me?”
She nuzzled me again. “We haven’t been with each other long, but that doesn’t mean we don’t know each other. I get you, Roman. How, I don’t know, but I do.”
“So…you’re my girlfriend?”
She nodded. “Unless you changed your mind?” Her eyes told me she was not entirely kidding.
“No,” I whispered. “I haven’t changed my mind.”
“Good.” She snuggled close, gazing up at me. “So. Tell me about your dad’s accident.”
“Before I do that can you tell me how you managed to get home, get changed, and get down here so fast?”
“It turned out to be pretty easy. Captain Martin went full speed ahead to the dock nearest the airport. I called Izzy and she met me there with a change of clothes and some toiletries. I booked a ticket on the first flight out to Seattle from the boat, so we Ubered it over there, I caught the flight, and now I’m here. Simple.” She rubbed my shoulder. “So now, tell me about what happened to your dad.”
“He got drunk and rolled his trailer off a ditch.” I sighed. “There’s a lot more to it, though. He was in love with his twin brother’s girlfriend, and never got over her. They fought over it, and ended up never speaking again because of it. I grew up not even knowing I had cousins. Now Dad is fucked up and we have to take care of him, but he’s being a bastard about moving back to Ketchikan because it’ll open up all the old hurts from way back. So it’s a mess.”
She winced. “Sounds like it. What will you do?”
“Hell if I know. I suggested Dad come to Ketchikan with us and he threw a tray at my head.” I shook my head, sighing. “I don’t know. Plus, there’s the bar to think about.”
She hesitated, clearly not wanting to piss me off. “What’s the deal there?”
“It’s not as easy as we thought,” I admit.
She laughed—she actually laughed. “So you admit it?”
I growl. “Don’t push my buttons right now, babe.”
Rem and Ram returned to the waiting room just then, coffee cups in hand, looking surprised at how cozy Kitty and I were.
“I don’t think you guys have met properly, yet,” I said. “Kitty—these are my brothers Remington and Ramsey. Guys, this is Kitty.”
For once, my brothers managed to behave, and if they had any questions about why she was here they kept them to themselves.
Instead, Ramsey said, “Did he just admit that the bar was a fuckin’ mistake?”
“No,” Kitty said, “but he did admit it was harder to get it going than you guys first thought,” Kitty said.
“We didn’t think it would be,” Remington said. “I told his ass it wouldn’t be easy.”
She frowned. “So why’d you go along with it?”
Ramsey laughed. “He’s our brother, for one thing, and he’s gone along with plenty of our stupid ideas.”
“But mainly we didn’t have any better ideas,” Remington added.
She shook her head. “I can’t believe you guys thought you could just buy a place and open a bar without knowing the first thing about it. I’m honestly surprised you’re as far along as you are.”
Ramsey laughed again. “We have the place renovated, because we’re good at that shit. But we got no fucking clue what to do next. We’re blowing money left and right. I think we have like a hundred bottles of whiskey, maybe ten cases of pint glasses and whatever, and no clue what else we need. This idiot is googling like a nutcase, but he’s no closer to have a fucking clue than when we were in Oklahoma. But his ass is too stubborn to ask for help, so we’re just letting him do his thing.”
Kitty just laughed. “And here you three lunkheads are with eight cousins who own one of the most successful bars in Alaska.” She patted me on the cheek, rolling her eyes. “You can lead a horse to water, Roman, but you can’t make him drink.”
“Seems to be the theme right now, huh?” I asked.
She nodded, and then stared up at me. “Take me to meet your dad.”
I stared back. “You sure?”
She nodded. So, I stood up, setting her on the floor, and glanced at my brothers—their eyes were wide, shocked. “Let’s go introduce Dad to my girlfriend.”
Epilogue
Juneau
* * *
“Why are we here again?” I asked Izzy as we rode the hospital elevator up to whichever floor we were going to.
“Because she’s our best friend, and this is her boyfriend’s dad. Besides, it’s the right thing to do.” Izzy touched up her lipstick, using the reflecting surface of the elevator button console as a mirror.
“How do we even know it’s a boyfriend-girlfriend thing? She hasn’t told us much.” I looked at Izzy, thinking I should spruce up a bit in case these purported hot-as-hell triplets were all in attendance. I didn’t, though, because why should I?
“The fact that she wouldn’t tell us what happened with her and Roman tells us all we need to know.” Izzy handed me her lipstick and pulled out her eyeshadow.
Just then the elevator doors opened and we headed to the nearest ladies’ washroom so Izzy could finish her makeup.
By then I’d decided to play along. I put on the lipstick, and then plumped up my cleavage, tugging the bra and shirt down and pushing the girls up, following it with some eyeshadow and mascara.
“She could just be waiting until we actually see her,” I said, resuming our conversation. “We only talked on the phone for like ten minutes.”
“And she said that night on the boat was the best night of her life. But she also said his dad is in the hospital, so she’s keeping Roman company at the hospital.”
“Why are we here? Isn’t this kind of private family business?”
Izzy stared at me. “Which one of us is supposed to be the nice one, again?”
“You’re super nice.”
“No, I’m not. I’m an ice-cold skank.”
I rolled my eyes. “Oh stop. Don’t be dumb. You’re neither ice-cold, nor a skank, nor a bitch.”
“I’m all three, and more besides.” She smacked my butt as we walked out the door. “Showtime.”
Realization dawned on me as we left the washroom. “Hold up. Wait, wait, wait—hold up.”
She stopped, popping a piece of gum in her mouth. “Yes, Juneau?”
“This is about Roman’s brothers, isn’t it?” I asked, gesturing at her appearance.
Izzy hiked her miniskirt a little higher, so the hem came to just above mid-thigh. “It’s about supporting our friend.” She winked at me as she pivoted. “And if her boyfriend’s brothers, who are single as far as I’m given to understand, happen to be there, then so be it.”
I huffed. “You’re absolutely shameless!”
She popped her gum. “Yup!”
“But you’ve dragged me into this!”
She caught at my arm and pulled me beside her. “Are you single?”
“Yes, but—”
“And do you like hot guys?”
“Well, yeah, but—”
“You saw Roman outside our apartment. He’s hot—am I right?”
“Yes, Isadora, but—”
“Thus it stands to reason his identical triplet brothers are also hot. And when was the last time you got laid?”
“Last month, but that doesn’t have anything to do with—”
She popped me on the butt again. “So? Let’s go! Worst-case scenario is we’re there to support our friend. Best-case scenario is we meet some hot guys, and possibly arrange a little hookup scenario.”
“You are shameless!”
“You said that already.” She winked at me. “And that’s why you love me.”
I huffed again as we headed toward the appropriate room number. We heard voices, loud ones, raised behind the door. We’d been told Roman’s dad was a bit rough around the edges, and we c
ould hear him now.
“I swore I’d never return, and I don’t want to be here, goddammit!” His voice was deep, rough, old, and raspy.
“But, Mr. Badd—” I recognized Kitty’s voice immediately.
Izzy and I just looked at one another and listened in.
“Name’s Lucas, girl. Use it. Don’t much stand on formality.”
“Okay, Lucas, then. You swore, how long ago? Forty years ago? Thirty? More years ago than I’ve been alive. A lot has changed. You’ve changed.” I heard her voice hesitate. “And, to be honest, none of the people involved are…are…”
“They’re all dead.” His voice was blunt and almost rude. “Don’t make it easier. And seeing my nephews would be…” His voice trailed off in that way that men often do.
“It would be good for you. You have family. Your sons have started connecting with them. Maybe you can, too.”
“I don’t wanna.”
“You’re being petulant, Lucas.”
“Kitty, you’re using ten-dollar words on a ten-cent fella, sweetheart.”
“You’re way smarter than you give yourself credit for.”
“Don’t count on it,” he grumbled.
There was a pause and then we heard, “And I don’t appreciate you using my weakness for pretty women against me, Roman.”
“I see where Roman gets his talent for flattery,” Kitty said.
“I’m gonna go get more coffee,” I heard a voice say.
Izzy moved out of the way as the door to the hospital room opened, but I was not fast enough.
The door swung open, and a huge male body swaggered out and slammed into me, knocking me backward.
I staggered backward, but my feet wouldn’t cooperate, and I found myself falling. Things happened in slow motion as sometimes happens, and I knew I wouldn’t be recovering from this one.
But, instead of hitting the floor, I felt a pair of hands grab me by the waist. Well… “waist” is not exactly accurate.
My ass, is what he grabbed. It was just one hand, though, because the other was wrapped around my shoulders. I was hovering inches above the floor with a powerful, massive hand on my ass and another around my shoulders, and the most vivid blue pair of eyes I’d ever seen were staring down at me.
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