Were it not for Kay’s fetish with Valentine’s Day, I might even love being here in her darling little bungalow. I’ve made the bed- room and extra bath my own. I decorated with rich Sheridan fabrics the day before finances became an issue.
There’s a knock at my bathroom door. “Are you ready, Ashley?” Kay asks.
I take one last run-through at my hair. “As ready as I’m going to be.” I open the bathroom door, and Kay has that pitying look on her face. “I’m fine,” I say.
“Just go and enjoy the wedding.”
“I plan to. I do!”
The phone rings and I dash for it. Every time it rings, I have this flush of guilt because it’s never for Kay. In her own home! I’ve got to get my own line before she kicks me out for disturbing the peace.
“Hello,” I say.
“Ashley, it’s Brea.”
“You better be coming today.”
“Relax. I’m coming.” Brea clears her throat. “I’m calling to remind you this is your brother’s day and that’s okay. Your brother did not ‘win’ because he’s doing something before you, all right?”
“What are you, my conscience?”
“Someone needs to be. This is the biggest day of his life, Ash. There’s no graduation; there’s no promotion at work. This is big for Dave. Okay?”
But I don’t feel any of the angst she’s predicting. I’m actually very happy for Dave and really excited to take a break from Silicon Valley. I kinda love my brother. Granted, I’ve endured life with him as my human tormentor. He’s told me for twenty years no sucker would marry me, given me a wedgie at the junior dance, invited his friends to read my diary, forged a love note from me to the quarterback . . . the list goes on. But Dave has changed, and it’s time I did too.
I breathe deeply. “I’m perfectly calm. I’m going to sing at church today, and I’ve been praying all morning, so you needn’t worry. Dave’s happiness is my own.”
“When you’re relaxed like this, that’s when I worry.”
“I’ll see you at church.” I hang up on her before she can harangue me any further.
Kay and I pile into her Honda Accord, and I warm up my voice all the way to church—which drives poor Kay into gripping the steering wheel with tense hands.
“I’m not that bad.”
“Your voice is beautiful, and you know it, Ash. I’m just nervous about church today. I’m meeting someone after service.”
“You are?” Oops, too much surprise in the voice. “I mean, that’s great, Kay. Is it someone I know?” Please, oh please, don’t let it be Seth. Please don’t rub that in my face, Lord.
“No, just someone I met at another church group when I went with Sharon.”
“What’s he do for a living?”
She dares to face me. “What do you think?”
“He’s a professional bungee jumper,” I deadpan.
“Yep. An engineer.”
“I hope you have a great time anyway. Did you bring a coupon with you?” I joke.
“Got one in my purse for three restaurants.”
“You’re all set then.”
Kay and I part company at church, and I go in the back to practice with the band. The ambiance candles are all lit and the church members are all taking their seats in the high-school theatre. Seth is, of course, right in the front row. He’s leaving on Friday. It’s a done deal, signed on the dotted line, his place having a “For Sale” sign out front. I drove by.
The church band opens with a rockin’ praise song that shakes the house. Everyone is dancing and lifting their arms in worship. While fired up, I wait for the pastor to introduce today’s message, and I take the stage to belt out my song of worship. For the first time in years, I focus on Him. Not who’s watching me, not even Seth in the front row. Just Him. I feel filled to capacity when I’m done.
After polite applause, I dare to take a seat next to Seth in the front row. The front row is the only half-empty one near me, and I decide to be a Big Girl and sit where God is leading me.
“Beautiful,” he whispers after a moment, then takes my hand. My hand! It’s a gesture of friendship, of truce, not love. Right? I force myself to steal a glance at him, but his expression gives me no answers. I squeeze his hand tighter. Don’t go, I implore with the strength of my grip.
“You can sing, woman.” Dr. Kevin Novak has just slipped into the seat on the other side of me and Seth quickly removes his hand. I’m torn. I feel like Kevin’s salvation and Seth’s ego rest squarely on my shoulders, and it’s all about balance.
The competition between the two men is obvious, each one determined—Seth to not be mocked, and Kevin to not lose this invisible war. After a lengthy sermon that I couldn’t concentrate on for fear I was sweating too much, the last song plays and I’m left standing beside both men.
“So I’m on my way to Vegas today,” I say as casual conversation.
“Me too,” Seth says.
“What?”
“I got a flight to Phoenix through Vegas for $50 round trip. One last house-hunting expedition.”
“How much is that wasted hour in sin city worth to you?” Kevin asks.
Seth shrugs. “About a hundred bucks, I suppose.”
The scene is really uncomfortable. I want to talk alone with Seth, but Kevin is not leaving and now that we’re playing dating Survivor, he’s not about to. I wish I had a rose. I’d have my own private Bachelorette rose ceremony. Kevin is here at church, however, and there could be a lot at stake in regard to his faith. The only way to get out safely is to say good-bye to them both at once.
I swallow hard, take a deep breath, and excuse myself. “I need to get to the airport. I’ll see you both when I get back.” But I know I won’t see Seth, and the idea leaves me short of breath.
“Call me when you get in. Do you need a ride from the airport?” Kevin asks.
Bless his heart, he’s a sweet agnostic, if nothing else. “No, thank you.”
I try to casually beckon Seth privately with my forefinger, but he doesn’t notice. My eyes connect with his. I know he feels it. There’s no denying the pull this time. He comes closer, ignoring Kevin’s presence. “Good-bye, Ashley.” He kisses me on the cheek, and I grasp his hand.
“You’re really leaving?” I whisper through my tears. Kevin senses the crowd feel and rubs my back to say good-bye. I ignore him. I only have eyes for Seth in this moment.
“I’ll be a VP,” Seth explains.
“In Arizona. You’ve always said that Silicon Valley is the place to be, Seth. This is where you stay for a long-term career in high-tech. Didn’t you tell me that once?”
“I probably said a lot of stupid things. When you start looking for work, Ashley, you might not be so picky in this economy. Moving up around here has become impossible.”
He steps even closer to me, and I don’t even care where Kevin is at this point. I can feel the heat from Seth’s chest, the energy between us. But I don’t back away. I give him my own silent challenge. He’s within inches of my face now, and I’m wondering if he’ll kiss me right here in church. I hold my breath, waiting. It’s not like we meet in a sanctuary—we’re in a high-school gym—but still. Kissing in church? Way uncool. But my worrying is for naught. He pulls away from my gaze and steps back. My breath rushes from me.
“I’ll e-mail you when I get back. Have fun at your brother’s wedding.” Seth nods and turns away.
“I’ll be at the Viva Vegas chapel if you want to stop during your layover,” I say, pathetically throwing myself his way.
He waves me off and continues to walk away, never even glancing back. Kevin is quickly beside me again.
“Everything okay?” Kevin asks.
“Fine. Just the way things are supposed to be.”
“Good. Let’s get some lunch before you leave for the airport. I’ll drive you,” Kevin offers. And I have nothing left in me to resist. But I’ll explain the equally-yoked passages over lunch. Some good needs to come from this day. And
this friendship. I wave to Kay, letting her know she’s off the hook as my ride, and I look to Kevin like I’m headed for the gallows.
33
The wedding chapel is gloomy dark, except for rainbow beams of light that come through the geometric stained-glass windows. There are no saints on this stained glass, only diamond and spade designs and, if I’m not mistaken, a single green dollar sign. I laugh at the thought of Dave picking the place. He loves to shock people, and I’m sure that was his intention here.
Truthfully, I’m a little creeped out, but I can see my brother’s flair for drama in all the details. There’s bloodred curtains draping down the walls and French white sheaths of fabric on the chairs with clown-sized bows on their backs. Tiny twinkle lights blink obnoxiously like it’s Christmas every day in Vegas, and I just know my brother will laugh about this until the day he dies.
Mei Ling must be a saint to put up with my brother. My traditional Chinese favors are going to go unnoticed amidst this assault circus on the senses. There are silk (nice way of saying fake) flowers everywhere, like a Jo-Ann fabric store exploded. The cathedral ceiling is enormous—cavernous might be a better word—with a black theatrical ceiling. I’m completely overwhelmed and can’t focus on any one place because another light blips and captures my line of sight.
I was deluged before I even walked in by the bevy of virginal white brides in the casino. Weddings, casinostyle, seem to include an abundance of cleavage.
Although the chapel seats fifty, there are nine people here besides the bride and groom. My three aunts—in full, sparkly, low-cut regalia to rival the casino brides—my parents, Brea and John, and the best man: Chip Light-me-another-one Standish. It’s so Ricki Lake, and I’m really feeling for my brother, except I know this is his ultimate wedding. And Mei Ling doesn’t seem to care. In the back room, she was actually giggling about her Vegas wedding being better than she imagined. That Dave certainly knew how to throw a party, and she loved that about him—how he was always the center of any party. She also informed me that they’re going to use the wedding money to go on a cruise to the Bahamas. She’s quite a woman to be able to tolerate this, even enjoy it. And obviously even more right for Dave than I thought.
I’m waiting at the end of the aisle, across from my brother, who looks like he could faint at any moment. I can see him breathing from ten feet away—not a good sign. Silently, I’m praying he’ll get through this. I wonder what it’s like to make a commitment to marriage when you haven’t even graduated to living on your own yet. I guess I haven’t had the proper respect for the step he’s taking.
I’m actually holding my own. I must admit the whole day is a bit surreal to me, like it’s not really happening. Maybe I’ll have this huge Light Bulb Moment when I realize I’m dateless at my brother’s wedding, but for now I’m just thankful I’m not getting married here.
I’m wearing a navy strapless Jessica McClintock gown. It’s off-the-rack, but the bride picked it, and I’m not looking like a stuffed eggplant, so I have no complaints. Mei Ling has good taste—well, maybe not in men or wedding chapels, but in fashion she’s quite adept.
The wedding march begins. There’s no piano, but it sounds like it’s live, and I find myself looking for the speakers. Mei Ling appears in the doorway. She’s absolutely beautiful in a gown she created herself—which she copied from a Vera Wang model with no pattern or anything. Who says that sewing is a lost art?
Mei Ling walks down the aisle. There’s no step, touch, step. She just clods down the aisle like the practical beauty she is. She stands next to my brother and smiles at him coolly. He, on the other hand, is now completely relaxed. He’s got that “I caught a butterfly” look that John always wears when looking at Brea.
The preacher has appeared out of nowhere, and I’m now wondering what he’s a preacher of, exactly? Meditative Realization? Yoga? One can be ordained in three minutes on the Internet and faster in Vegas. I got a spam once that said that.
“Dearly beloved,” the minister says in a deep, old-time-Baptist tone. “We are gathered here today to intertwine David Jeffrey Stockingdale and Mee Lingah Wah in holy matrimony.” Maay Ling, I want to correct him. And intertwine? That sounds a bit nasty to me, but I look to my brother and he’s enraptured by his bride. Okay, intertwine it is.
“Marriage is a holy state. Intertwining the two as one.” He’s loving that word.
I look at Brea, and she’s covering her face. Now, anyone else might think she’s emotional, but I know better. I know she’s laughing immaturely at the use of intertwine by the preacher. This starts it. I look away from Brea, but it’s too late; we’ve seen each other.
That irrepressible giggle starts to bubble. The kind you can’t stop when it starts. The kind that becomes louder as you try to stifle it. I keep it under control for a few seconds, but then I just lose it. How can I be so immature? Intertwining is just a word, after all. Everyone is looking at me now, and Brea and I don’t dare meet each other’s eyes again. I bite down on my lips to halt the laughter.
Closing the Bible with a crack, the minister talks more about intertwining as one. Enough already! But my eyes must be deceiving me. Suddenly, out of the ceiling a great hole opens up and a man and a woman dressed in powder blue leotards descend, wrapping around each other like two snakes in heat. I look around to see if I’m really witnessing what I think I am. And since everyone’s eyes are on the ceiling, I have to assume it’s true. There are two people in skimpy clothing clawing each other from a swinging trapeze. Like that singing female bear at Country Bear Jamboree in Disneyland, only not so much.
Oh, I can’t take it. I just can’t take it. My laughter is growing in intensity so it’s becoming obvious. This is just so wrong!
The minister asks if I’d like to excuse myself and then moves on, with more intertwining talk, more slithering limbs in the sky. The preacher’s on the clock, and, judging by the sheer amount of white satin in that foyer, he’s got to get a move-on. Other brides await. My brother and Mei Ling are told to light their unity candle.
“As you light this candle to signify your unity, Junien and Patrice will perform an arial adagio symbolizing the unity of two souls.” Junien and Patrice, all limbs from the looks of them, jumble into one big human pretzel, with pained expressions on their overly made-up faces to emphasize the drama of the moment. I’m in awe.
What do you suppose Patrice says when asked about her job? “Um, I wrap myself around a guy in tights while hanging from a ceiling.” Does no one else see what I’m seeing? I’m struggling to keep my mouth quiet while my whole body shakes with laughter. I have to fan my face. My legs are weak, and I can barely stand. My aunts are staring at me as though they cannot understand what is so comical. There are two people in the air, hanging in a hypnotic porno-graphic pose, and I’m the one with the problem. Like I said, I know I’m adopted.
Before you know it, Patrice and Junien have ascended into the ceiling, ready to be dropped onto another unsuspecting congregation. But it’s of no use now, I’m still giggling like an overly enthusiastic sitcom fan.
The preacher does his best to stare me down, as does my brother. Mei Ling has started to giggle as well. And soon, my brother is joining her until we’re all practically slapping our knees.
Dave and Mei Ling are pronounced man and wife, and they both try to get a solemn look, but they’re still laughing. They do kiss each other warmly when asked to, though, and it’s official: They’re intertwined. They wait at the altar and are greeted by all the guests. All nine of them.
My brother’s best man, Chip, is beside me. “Nice wedding, huh? What was so funny?”
“I was just nervous, I guess.”
“I guess.”
“Please join Mee Linga and David for a reception in this room.” Reading the names off a clipboard—hey, another career for Kay—a middle-aged, redheaded woman ushers us into the next room. Before we’re out, I see the chapel doors open and a new groom ready to take his place. So much for form
ality.
Dave and Mei Ling walk over to me and, go figure, I’m choked up. “I’m sorry I laughed, I guess I was nervous.”
Dave starts to chuckle. “I thought you were laughing at the intertwining thing.”
I just shake my head. “How did you decide on that particular theme?”
Dave shrugs. “I just thought, I’m never going to have the chance again to pay two people to drop from the ceiling. That’s cool. Will anyone ever forget our wedding?”
“Not likely,” I admit.
Mei Ling laughs. “You should have warned me, Dave. I nearly had a heart attack. I thought we were being invaded or robbed. In my country, it’s not a good thing when people drop from the ceiling.” She takes my hand. “And your poor sister. I bet she’s never been to a wedding where there’s actual entertainment.”
“Can’t say I have, but it was a beautiful wedding.”
“Our second one,” Mei Ling whispers.
“What?” I look towards Dave.
“We had our pastor marry us before we came here. It was nice. Traditionally Chinese and actually in the language.”
I thrust a fist toward him. “And you didn’t invite me?”
“We had an older Christian couple who’s been mentoring us stand up with us.” Dave puts his arm around Mei Ling. “It was important to us to do this before God with the people who have taught us so much. I wanted it to be intimate so I could focus on what He has done for us.”
I shake my head. “Well, Dave, I didn’t think it was possible, but you surprised me again.”
“It’s just one of the many surprises I have lined up. Wait until you see the honeymoon suite, Mei Ling.” Dave kisses his bride, and then faces me. “So what are you doing with your night in Vegas?” He scans the room. “Our cousins aren’t here, so you’ve got no dance partners to fend off. Maybe you and Chip can gamble together.”
What a Girl Wants Page 26
