by Rita Hestand
One look and anyone could tell, and I’m claimin’ her. You hear that, Maggie? I’m puttin’ my life on the line, for her and for you. But I’m doing it because I want it that way. Understand? You are my woman. You wouldn’t be here if you weren’t, and we’ll have our share of hell, just bein’ together. Slavery may be over, but it don’t allow for what we done. So we can ban together and be a family like we should, or we can fight each other and everyone else out there. That’s up to you.
Make it easy on yourself.”
“But we ain’t livin’ in sin,” she objected vehemently.
“Well, why don’t you announce that, if you really think anyone would believe it after looking at Abby? We had a child, Maggie. In most southern people’s opinion, that is definitely livin’ in sin. You better get used to people talkin’ behind your back, and stiffen your spine because that’s what is gonna happen. And there
will be others who want to see us dead. I’ll handle them, but you’ll have to take what the white women say with a grain of salt. You work hard, make this place livable, and some might actually think well of you. But the majority won’t. We both knew all this before Abby was born. It didn’t matter then, and it don’t matter now. They will think what they want to think about us. Whether it is the truth or not.”
His gaze met hers as fire shot from her eyes. “We stepped over the line a long time ago. I wanted you then, and I want you now. Nothin’s changed. That’s my baby, and I’m claiming her. Come hell or high water, I won’t let anyone hurt her, you understand. Not because of your rules, but because she’s mine. I’ll die first. I don’t care what color skin she’s got. You came here. You made the decision to do that. But I’m making the decision that you will stay, and you will be my woman and let me help raise my child. We are family, like it or not. I’m all you got. And from this moment on, Maggie, we are stickin’ together.”
As though he’d decided it long ago, he stood before her. “I’ll find someone who will marry us.”
“No! I won’t marry you. Marryin’ is nothin’ more than a piece of paper,” she protested hotly. “Besides, it’s agin’ the laws in most places, and we’d most likely both be hanged for it.”
“You got no choice in this one, Maggie. You want to live here, under my roof, under my protection, we’ll marry.”
“It's a fool notion and you know it.”
“Look, I don’t know if you are Christian or not. I never bothered to ask you, but I am. I was raised a Christian. It may not look like it, it may not sound like it, but I’m a God fearin’ man. If we cain’t marry, then I will have either a black preacher or an Indian holy man marry us. One way or another, we will be married!”
“Of all the stupid….”
“Oh!” he scoffed as rage enflamed him from her rejection. “Don’t carry on so.
I’ll abide by your rules, but you’ll abide by mine, too.”
“Yours?” she scathed.
“Mine. We will marry, somehow, someway. You will present yourself as my wife and my child. Hard as it’s gonna be, I won’t touch you lest you invite me, and
we will sleep in the same bed, as I am not sleepin’ on the floor in my own house for the rest of my life. We’ll build a room for the baby and this will be your home.
When I die, you will erect a tombstone for me that reads, ‘Jesse Coleman, beloved husband and father.’ Understood? Those are my rules,” Jesse said and walked off.
“Why is it so important to you for us to marry? The very action will bring reaction. Marryin’ will only call more attention to us, don’t you see that?”
Jesse turned to look at her. She glared at him, her mouth open, her brows drawn down. He came close so he could meet her eye to eye. “I just told you why.
And although we are guilty of fornication, I loved you then, I love you now, and you will be my wife by all that’s holy. Do you understand? You think I made love to you because I lusted after your body. Well, it’s true in part. I loved that part of you, too. However, I loved your spirit, your innocence, you courage. And when I took you in, I loved the way you held yourself proud and faced what they did to you. I loved your heart that was so giving.”
“No one will recognize our marriage,” she protested. “They’ll likely hang us.”
“Maybe so, but Abby is gonna know at least I tried to make it all come right for us.” His eyes met hers once more with a steel edge.
He stared for a moment and thought on her words. “Everybody’s got to die, Maggie, one way or another. We made our bed a long time ago and whether it’s a hard bed or not, we got to lie in it. But I don’t and will never regret taking you as my woman.”
Chapter Six
Maggie didn’t know what to say, but she gathered his admission of love into her soul like a prize possession, staring after him with a desire she thought long put away. Tears came into her eyes. What she had brought upon them and their child? Despite everything, she still loved Jesse and would till she died, but she was older now, had seen more of the world, and wasn’t sure they could ever make it. Most everyone would be against them. Even if he did really love her, the odds were against them.
What amazed her was that Jesse was more than willing to die for her and the baby, with or without her rules. Her heart swelled with the knowledge and yet broke, too. How could it all work out right?
Maybe he just committed to her and the baby because of responsibility. She didn’t know. Surely as the sun was hot, he could walk away from them both and no one would hold him to it.
She found the butter churn, cleaned it up nicely, and got it ready. She’d make butter in the morning after milking the cow. She could study on Jesse’s words and figure out what to do about things next then. What he’d said made a lot of sense and was the truth. She’d come to him for protection and to see if Jesse had any real feelings for her. His revelation of love shocked her beyond words. Had she misjudged him all along?
Memories of her confinement dimmed.
As she was cleaning out the churn, two women rode up in the yard in a buggy, well-dressed, with matching umbrellas to shade their eyes from the probing sun.
Maggie straightened herself and waited. She’d seen many finely dressed ladies come in and out of the fort; these ladies didn’t look much different. One was young, the other much older. Maggie suddenly wished she’d have dressed better.
They probably didn’t know what to think of her in britches.
They didn’t say anything at first, just stared at her without cracking a smile.
Then after glancing about the place, the older lady spoke up and got out of the
carriage. “Hello, there. We’re looking for Jesse. Jesse Coleman?” The woman sauntered up to her boldly, her dress tight fitting and revealing. She wore an expensive perfume and jewelry on her ears and arms and neck. She had blonde hair and blue eyes and a figure to be proud of, Maggie noticed.
“This is still his place, isn’t it?” The woman glanced about, as if unsure of herself.
“It’s his place, all right. But he isn’t here. He’s gone to town for some supplies.”
Maggie didn’t stare, but went back to her work. She’d bite her tongue out before asking who they were. And she wouldn’t be feeding them information about herself either. They could draw their own conclusions. She realized early on from other ladies on the plantations back in Louisiana that a black woman must always know her place.
“I see. Well, I’m Lucy Stewart and that lady in the carriage is Constance Newman, old friends of Jesse’s. It’s a shame we rode all the way out here and didn’t run into him. We wanted to welcome him home from the war.”
“Pleased to meet you. I’m Maggie. He left before sun up. He’ll likely be back soon, if you want to wait. I could make you some tea or coffee?” She cast the other woman a quick appraisal and lowered her head. It would be ill-mannered to stare, but they sure were looking at her. However, it was the other woman that interested her so, because like as not, she sought Jesse.
/> “Coffee? Did you hear that, Constance? She has coffee.” Lucy held a hand to her chest and smiled.
Their fine dresses spoke of money. Maggie couldn’t resist glancing at the younger lady in the carriage. Obviously, she came to see Jesse. The older one came out of curiosity, she was sure. Just from a quick glimpse she could tell the young woman was rich and spoiled.
“Oh, that would be lovely. So nice to see Jesse hiring some help around here.”
Lucy went inside as though she had every right. Maggie noted that, but said nothing.
“Oh my, the place looks much better than the last time I saw it. Why, Constance, this woman has worked wonders on the place. Come look. And I’ll bet she’s a fine cook, too.”
Her friend followed her inside, her impatience obvious. Her pale gray eyes assessed the place as she sat at the table and waited to be served. Constance studied Maggie with more than a little curiosity.
Maggie didn’t correct Lucy’s impression that she was the hired help but went to make the coffee. She wondered what kind of conversation she could hold with these two. So Jesse did have some lady friends, it would seem. Not that she ever doubted his ability to have them, but he hadn’t spoken of them. She wondered why.
The younger woman eyed her with distaste. “You been working for Jesse long?”
How could she answer without lying?
“No, not long,” she replied. “Excuse me, please.”
Maggie went to the bedroom to check on Abby, who was sleeping. Maggie wasn’t ready for this. What could she say to them? How could she keep answering their nosy questions? And they were nosy. Perhaps they had every right to be.
How could she possibly know?
She leaned against the closed door. They thought she was hired help, then she’d act like it. She went back to them and poured their coffee, silently hoping Abby would sleep a while longer. From the first sip, Maggie knew they hadn’t indulged in coffee since before the war. She tried to smile, but her nerves were so on edge.
“It’s good that Jesse is finally taking some pride in this place. It could be quite grand. He owns a lot of land out here,” Constance was saying. “I wouldn’t mind living here, after we’re married, of course. Jesse never bothered cleaning it up before, but maybe he’s matured, what with being in the war and all. I’m so anxious to see him. It’s been so long. We heard he’d been promoted to captain.
There was a write-up of it in the paper. Said he’d captured some famous spy. It’s so exciting.”
Maggie almost choked as she busied herself in the kitchen. So Jesse either was involved or had been with this one. Displeasure at finding her in Jesse’s home rolled off the other woman.
“So wherever did Jesse find you? I’d so love to have some help myself,” Lucy asked, coming to stand in front of Maggie.
“I was a laundress at the rebel fort,” she mumbled and didn’t look the woman in the eye. At least she hadn’t lied. She’d give them a little information. What could it hurt? The woman seemed to accept her answer with a smile.
Maggie’s eyes strayed to Miss Constance, who looked utterly bored and out of place in this little shack with her fine dress of silk and her matching parasol. She couldn’t see Jesse with a woman like that. But then what did she know about his love life?
Suddenly the door flew open, and Jesse walked in boldly. His gaze swept the room as Constance ran up to him and kissed him on the cheek. Lucy nodded and smiled. “Jesse, why in the world haven’t you been to call since you’ve been home?”
“Miss Constance and Miss Lucy. I certainly didn’t expect to see the two of you out here. Well, I didn’t realize anyone was interested in me being home.” Jesse tried to laugh, but it fell short. His glance strayed to Maggie. “Certainly no one came to see me off to war, did they? I don’t recall you ever coming to visit before.”
“Your housekeeper’s done told us you were in town, and Mr. Jenkins told Mr.
Caverty you were home from the war. You should have let us know. We’d have greeted you better.” Constance fussed over him, looping an arm in his. “We heard you were promoted to captain. That’s quite an honor. We are all so proud of you.
And capturing a spy single-handed. That’s something! You must tell us all about it.”
Jesse pulled her arm loose and walked toward Maggie. “My housekeeper?”
“Yes, she’s introduced herself as Maggie.” Lucy smiled as she sat back down for her coffee. “Wherever did you get this coffee? It’s the first we’ve had since before the war started.”
“Maggie traded the coffee off an old Indian. I’m afraid you have some wrong impressions here. Maggie’s not my housekeeper.” Jesse’s gaze floated from one lady to the next. “She’s going to be my wife,” he said, pulling Maggie about and putting his arm around her. “You’ll certainly be invited to the wedding, of course.”
Maggie raised her head, but she couldn’t bring herself to say anything. She waited instead for some reaction. Secretly, she wanted to hit Jesse for his insensitive nature, but she smiled shyly instead.
The only reaction in the room was the slight movement of Constance’s jaw and the fire from her gray eyes as she looked surprised from Jesse to Maggie. “Well, I…but I—”
The baby cried and Jesse ran to the bedroom to bring her out. “Guess I should introduce our baby, too. This is Abby. Isn’t she beautiful?” Jesse cooed at Abby as he presented her to the women.
Lucy’s eyes rounded like saucers and her mouth came open. “Come,
Constance. We must be getting back.”
“Sorry, you can’t stay longer. I’m sure we’ll have a fine supper in no time.
Maggie’s a wonderful cook.” Jesse moved to watch them hurry out of the house and back into their buggy. Both of them were hurling heated remarks at each other as Lucy cracked the whip that sped them from the yard. They obviously couldn’t be gone fast enough.
“Why did you do that?” Maggie approached him from behind. “That was
uncommonly cruel.”
Jesse turned to look at her. “Uncommonly cruel? You actually care about how they feel? They won’t feel anything for you. But I guess you got a bigger heart at that. I did it because I’m not hiding it, Maggie. I love you and the baby, and I’m more than proud that you will soon be my wife, and the rest of the people around here are just going to have to learn to live with it. That’s why. You’re the woman I want, not women in hi-top shoes and carrying parasols. You and Abby, and many more babies to come.” He glanced at her. “And when you finally figure that out, things will get back to normal again.”
“What do you think they’ll do since you decided to announce it?” Maggie cried, her nerves shattered by his matter-of-fact approach.
“I don’t know, and I don’t care. People were bound to find out. Maybe this is the best way. They’ll be nursing their pride for a while, I’m sure.” Jesse laughed.
“Let them. Those women don’t care about me. Not me, personally. They care about all this land around here that belongs to me.”
“That Miss Constance acted as though she had a right to think you cared for her. Kissing you and putting her arm around you.”
“She wishes.” Jesse smirked. “The woman’s been throwing herself at me ever since her Pa became interested in buying this place. I know what she’s after. She doesn’t want me. She wants the land. A lot of people in town want my land, but they won’t be getting it. Look, Maggie, I’m home, and I aim to stake my claim to the land and you. So get used to it.” Maggie’s questioning apprasial had him throwing his hands up. “I’ve never even kissed the woman. Now, what’s for supper? I’m starved.”
“Supper! I think we should talk about all of this, Jesse. You tellin’ people we are gonna be married. Why, who in their right minds would marry us?”
“You might be surprised. Besides, I aim to find a preacher, and soon.” Jesse dismissed her frayed nerves.
She finally gave up talking and went to cooking.
There was no ti
me for supper when Abby began crying and they couldn’t quiet her. Both Maggie and Jesse became worried. Jesse rocked her while Maggie tried to get supper on, but Abby continued to cry. She fretted and when Jesse reached to feel her head, she felt hot to his touch.
“She’s burning up,” he told Maggie as he carried their daughter about the kitchen. “Run, get that tub hanging out on the side of the shed.”
“What are you gonna do?” Maggie’s eyes widened in fear as she touched Abby’s head, too.
“We gotta get this fever down. She’s hot already.” Jesse put the baby on his shoulder and continued walking about, trying to soothe Abby.
Maggie hurried out to the shed and found the tub. She came back with it and Jesse told her to heat some water.
“Do you know what you’re doing?” Maggie asked.
“Yes, I know. Saw a doc in the army bring down a fever once doing this. We need tepid water. It’ll be too cold straight from the well. We’ll splash her with it and cool her down. Just play with her and maybe she won’t cry so much. I’ll check the cabinet in the bedroom for rubbing alcohol.”
Maggie nodded, heating water so they could fill the tub.
After pouring several pots full of hot water and adding some cold, Jesse swirled it around until it felt just right, then stripped Abby and lowered her into it. Normally, Abby would play and clap her hands and splash in the water, but not this time. She lay almost quiet as Jesse continued to sprinkle the water over her.
Abby began to hush as Jesse played splashing games with her. She smiled and cooed at him. “Dada?”
Maggie blushed. “I been tryin’ to teach her words. She can say some sentences, and words, I've been teaching her what to call you.”
“That’s right, honey. I’m your daddy, that’s for sure and certain, baby. And damn proud of it.” Jesse smiled and kept gently pouring the water over her body.
