Love Cursed

by Julia Derek

  “Nah, it wasn’t so bad,” I said. I wasn’t completely lying when I told her this. When I’d been involved in street fights, my adrenaline had been running so high I’d barely felt any of the hits I’d taken. But the scars on my body were not from street fights—I wasn’t usually the receiver of the blows in those, only in the first ones, before I’d learned how to fight. I didn’t think even one of them were from my foster father’s belt, either. No, they were from the beating I’d received when I told the Devils’ boss I wanted out of the gang. Even though I’d been allowed to defend myself, I’d barely been able to, I’d been so drunk. But somehow I’d gotten out alive in the end, managed to block a few deadly blows. My will to live had been that strong. “It was worth it to get out of the gang.”

  “I’m so glad you got out,” Ricki said and caressed my cheek. “I know most gang members who want out never do.”

  “How do you know that?”

  “I did a paper on gangs in college.”

  I nodded. “Ah. So you must know a thing or two about gangs then.”

  “You could say that. I’m generally very interested in urban and socio-economic issues. I’m a double major—sociology and economics.”

  I pinched her chin. “Smart and beautiful.”

  Her pale skin turned a couple of shades pinker. “Did you join the gang because you couldn’t stand the thought of another foster family?”

  I thought about her question. “I guess that pretty much sums it up,” I finally replied.

  She frowned. “Pretty much? Was there another reason you joined?”

  “Yeah. I was okay with living in shelters and working odd jobs until I graduated high school. My school didn’t know I’d run away. At first I thought that was really weird, but then I found out the reason.”

  She gazed at me expectantly.

  “My foster parents didn’t report that I’d run away and just kept collecting the money for me.”

  Her mouth dropped open in shock. “What! That’s horrible. I can’t believe they got away with that.” She closed her mouth. “Actually, I can. I know the foster care system in this country could use a serious overhaul. How did you find out they did that?”

  “One of my foster siblings told me I had nothing to worry about since they were planning to keep taking the money for as long as they could.” He chuckled. “For all I know, they’re still collecting money for me. No one from social services ever tried to find me after I ran away that time.”

  “Wow. How incredibly irresponsible.” She tsk’d in disbelief.

  “Yup. Anyway, I didn’t really care. I was almost fourteen, big enough to take care of myself. Or so I thought. Until I pissed off some members of the Crips on the street and they became hell-bent on killing me. Members of the Latin Devils offered me protection if I joined them. I really had no choice but to accept their offer. There were too many of the Crips.”

  Ricki looked like she was pondering what I’d told her. “I didn’t know the Crips and the Devils were active all the way down in Texas. Which city were you in when you joined?”

  “In Los Angeles. Soon after my grandma returned me to my foster family, someone in the system found out that I’d run away to her and had me transferred to a family in L.A. I guess someone thought it was best if I was farther away from my birth family.” I shrugged. “Who the hell knows the reason why? But that’s how I ended up in L.A. anyway.”

  Ricki

  Dante got up on his elbows and gazed at me from where he lay on top of me. Something had changed in his expression. His dark eyes had assumed that burning quality.

  “I think we’ve done enough talking for now, don’t you?” he said. “I don’t want to depress you with my miserable stories.”

  “You’re not depressing me,” I replied. “I just feel bad that you’ve been forced to go through all this. I guess you’re right when you said I was a privileged brat. Compared to your life, I feel like I am.”

  He looked down. “I’m sorry I said that. I don’t believe you’re a privileged brat. You’re one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. Maybe the nicest.”

  I smiled at him. “I hope I can live up to that assessment. I want to be the nicest person that you’ve ever met.”

  “I think you will be.” He rolled off me then and walked over to the boombox. I’d been so enraptured with his story that I’d totally forgotten about the music, hadn’t even noticed that it was still playing. INXS’s Need You Tonight was suddenly coming out of the loudspeakers, again at a discreet volume. As he returned to me, there was a playful glint in his black eyes.

  He leaned down to kiss me, slowly and lightly at first, almost tickling my tongue with his. As the music picked up pace, so did he, deepening our kiss. He lay down on top of me, forcing his hips between my legs. I gladly helped him get to where he wanted. The way he kept kissing me, with the hunger of a man who desperately needed love from a woman, had the power to turn me on like I’d never been before. I wrapped my legs around his back and felt how he was already hard and big against me, which turned me on even more. His hands began tracing my body, exploring every part of me, as if wanting to be sure that I was really there, not a figment of his imagination.

  “You’re so incredibly soft,” he murmured. “So feminine.”

  As he began kissing my chest, my hands found his cock in his boxer briefs and helped it get bigger and harder against his washboard abs. Very soon he’d removed his boxer briefs and we were naked together. I lay back down and watched him apply a condom to himself in the soft candle light, make himself even harder as he was on his knees between my legs. I couldn’t imagine a sexier sight than this powerful man covered in tattoos, radiating the urge to take me, fill me up with himself.

  He watched me as he touched himself, a teasing little smile on his lips.

  “What would you like me to do to you, Ricki?” he asked in that sexy voice, gazing at me with half closed, burning eyes.

  “I… I,” I mumbled, unable to get out the words that I wanted to say. I was way too embarrassed to say that I wanted him to literally fuck my brains out. Just the thought of saying those words made me blush now.

  “Say it, Ricki, tell me what you want me to do to you… I’d love it if you talked dirty to me. There’s nothing sexier than a girl like you talking dirty. I know you want me to fuck you.” His eyes gleamed with lust and the teasing little smile on his lips grew wider. “All you need to do is ask me and I’d be happy to fuck you. Say it, Ricki. I know you like saying it as much as I like to hear it…”

  “Please fuck me,” I managed to murmur under my breath, sure my face was red like a tomato.

  He bit his lips and inhaled. “I couldn’t hear you, querida. Tell me louder…”

  I don’t know where I found the audacity, but suddenly I heard myself almost yell the words and he was right, it did turn me on even more.

  “Yeah, that’s what I wanted to hear,” he said and grabbed my legs under my knees, pushing my legs up and apart. Then he found his way inside me, moving slowly and superficially, driving me crazy with his insistence not to go deeper. Only when I told him what I wanted, several times, did I get my wish fulfilled and soon we both climaxed in a long, earth-shattering moment of pure bliss. Minutes later we had both fallen asleep in each other’s arms.

  I was still thinking that I was dreaming when my alarm went off at five in the morning and I saw Dante sleeping soundly next to me. I woke him up with a kiss.

  “Dante,” I whispered. “I hate to do this to you, but you have to wake up.”

  He opened his eyes and appeared completely confused, his hair messy in a way that made him adorable-looking. Soon a lazy smile of recognition had spread across his face. He pinched my chin at the same time as he pressed a kiss onto my lips.

  “Mornin’” he said and stretched his long body. Then he bounced out of bed, like he’d slept nine hours, not three. He turned to me. “Can I take a quick shower?”

  “Sure. Do whatever you need to do. Help yours
elf to whatever you want.” I made a face. “I’m afraid I don’t have any manly smelling shampoos, though.”

  “That’s okay. I don’t mind smelling like a girl for a day. Remember, I’m very comfortable with my sexuality.” He winked at me. “Besides, it’ll make me think of you…”

  I couldn’t help but smile at his energetic moves as I watched him make his way to my bathroom. I guess he’d meant what he’d said about what a night with me would do to him. I didn’t feel quite as energetic myself, so I was glad I didn’t have to get up for another few hours.

  When I woke up a second time at the sound of my alarm clock, I languished in bed another couple of minutes, thinking about Dante’s promise to call me later in the day. It was the last thing he’d said before he’d left my apartment. God, I really hope that he will…

  I shook my head at the sudden doubt that had popped into my head. Why would he not call me? After a night like this, after having waited outside my building to tell me all that he’d told me yesterday, how could he not call me? Of course we would be going out from now on, become a couple. Everything would be great. It was just me thinking I didn’t deserve the perfection that had been Dante last night and this morning, for it to continue. Of course it would.

  There’s nothing I can do about it anyway but wait and see what happens, I thought and got out of bed.

  As I got to the office an hour later, I spotted Aidan sitting behind his desk, staring at the computer screen as usual. I suddenly remembered what I’d told Nixon about Aidan—I really did think that the two of them might make a great couple. I walked up to Aidan’s desk.

  “Hi there,” I said and smiled. “How are you doing today?”

  He jerked and blinked a couple of times, as though the last thing he’d expected was me standing there. He quickly recuperated and returned my smile. “Good morning, Ricki.” He studied me for a moment. “My, don’t you look happy. Care to share what’s giving you that glow?”

  I decided that for now I wouldn’t tell anyone besides my closest friends what had happened with Dante. And while I was no longer mad at Aidan—in fact, I had a feeling we might even become good friends—he definitely didn’t belong in that category yet.

  So I shrugged. “I just had a good night’s sleep is all. Hey, are you seeing someone right now?”

  Aidan looked a little uncomfortable. “Um, no. I can’t say that I am.”

  I threw a glance over my shoulder to make sure Patty wasn’t anywhere close by; neither I nor Aidan needed her in our business. But she was for once seated behind her desk, talking to someone on her headset while typing on her keyboard. Still, I lowered my voice as I leaned closer to Aidan.

  “Well, then you should go on a date with my friend, Nixon,” I said.

  A wrinkle appeared between Aidan’s baby blues. “I should? O-kay… Do you have a photo of him? A few would be even better.”

  I nodded. “I have plenty of photos of him. He’s one of my very best friends. I think you and he would be perfect together.” I found my smartphone in my purse and pulled up a couple of photos of Nixon. Aidan’s reaction was just what I’d expected as he scrolled through the photos. His eyes widened and he gasped with delight. “Oh, my God, he’s gor-geous!”

  I pouted my lips. “Mm-hmm… Yes, he is, isn’t he? And he’s as nice as he’s gorgeous.”

  “What’s wrong with him?” Aidan asked, his eyes narrowed suddenly.

  I stared at him. “What do you mean, what’s wrong with him? Nothing. Not only is he gorgeous and as nice as can be, but he owns his own personal training business.”

  Aidan looked impressed. “Really? He just sounds too good to be true. Something’s got to be wrong with him or he wouldn’t be single. Sorry, that’s just my experience.”

  “Well, this one is just as good as he sounds. And actually, he isn’t really single. He’s just on a break from his on-again, off-again boyfriend. But they’re just not good together, so I thought the two of you should give it a shot.”

  “All right. If you think we’d be good together, I’m willing to see him. If he wants to meet me, that is.”

  “Yes, I’ve already told him about you. And he agreed to see you right away without demanding to see photos and then start complaining the guy was too perfect.” I gave him a reproachful glance, crossing my arms over my chest.

  Aidan lowered his head. “I apologize. That was really ungrateful and rude of me. If I can have his phone number, I’ll call him as soon as I get the chance.”

  “Hi guys!” Patty’s loud voice sounded behind us. “What are you talking about?”

  “Um, nothing special,” I replied, facing her. I turned back to Aidan. “I’ll text it to you.”

  He smiled at me. “Perfect.”

  Dante

  “What are you doing?” I asked Ricki over the phone. It was evening and I had spent the entire day reliving our night together in my mind, feeling just as energetic as I’d expected. Only now, as I waited for Jose to meet me at the Whiskey, did my lack of sleep finally get to me a little and it was nice to sit down. He was running late for once, which was great as it gave me a few minutes to talk to Ricki.

  “I’m out power walking on Santa Monica beach,” she responded. “You know, I’m trying to get in shape.”

  I laughed. Then I said in a discreet voice. “After all the exercise you got last night, I think you deserve a day off, baby.”

  “You do, huh? Well, from what I can remember, you were the one who did most of the exercise, so I disagree.”

  “You might be right about that… How are you feeling? Did you get any sleep after I left this morning?”

  “Yeah, three hours. I passed out as soon as you left because I didn’t even hear you start your bike.”

  “Wow, you must have passed out hard.” My Harley was pretty loud and I’d parked it right outside Ricki’s bedroom window. “So you’re a good sleeper then.”

  “Yeah, I am. People can blow up bombs next to me and I’d still be sleeping. What about you? Are you a good sleeper?”

  “Not really.” I wasn’t about to tell Ricki about the fact that most nights of the week I woke up in a cold sweat after having nightmares. Not yet. Later on, I would. When I knew her better. Besides, yesterday I’d slept fine the three hours I’d slept in her bed. I told her as much. “You’re clearly a good influence on me,” I added. “You make me sleep like a baby.”

  “Thank God for that. I think you’re a good influence on me, too, because I can’t remember ever having been so motivated to eat only healthy stuff and feeling like working out. You’d be proud of me if you knew what I’d been eating today—-only fruits, veggies and grilled chicken slices. No bad carbs at all.”

  “Good job, querida. If you’re not hungry, keep it up like that. But as much as you work out, you’re allowed to cheat a little. I forgot to ask you. How do you like working out with Gabi?”

  “She’s great. She pushes me like crazy. In a different way from you. You’re both great trainers.”

  “I’m glad you like her. I thought you’d be a good match.”

  “Yeah, I think it’ll be great to continue working out with her.” She paused, as if realizing something. “You don’t need me to continue working out with you? Are you good with your numbers?”

  I cleared my throat; I hated that she’d found out about my initial reason for pursuing her. “Yeah, don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. Besides, I couldn’t be seeing you if you were my client. And I’d rather go out with you than train you. I don’t know about you. You’d rather train with me than be my girlfriend?”

  She didn’t say anything at first. Then, she said, in a weak voice. “No, I’d much rather be your girlfriend…” I could tell that she was smiling.

  I smiled, too. “Good.”

  “And now I’m glad they’re making you work harder because otherwise I doubt that we’d end up like this. I mean, I don’t think you’d have called me like that every day if you didn’t really need to fill up your sch
edule, right?”

  “Yeah, you’re probably right about that.” My smile widened; I knew I’d like this girl even more, the more I got to know her. She obviously wasn’t one to hold grudges. And it wasn’t all bad that I was working my ass off at Crunch; apart from the fifty a day I was handing Jose, I’d managed to save almost two thousand bucks since I’d begun doubling my numbers. At the end of my probation and with Jose out of the gang, I’d have enough money to fund my own gym.

  “What are you up to anyway?” Ricki asked. “In between clients?”

  I wasn’t going to tell her about what I was doing with Jose. It was less than three weeks left until he’d announce that he wanted to leave the Devils, so what was the point? I didn’t want her to think I was still involved even indirectly with the gang. It was bad enough that I was on probation. I already knew that she was superficially aware of the reason for it—Gabi had filled me in today when I ran into her and apologized profusely if her revelations had gotten me in trouble. I’d assured Gabi that it was all good and not to worry. Still, I wasn’t looking forward to having to explain the burglary in more detail to Ricki. As inquisitive as she was, she’d surely ask about it. Even if I’d only been the lookout during it, I couldn’t help feeling guilty for all the damage the Devils had done to the house. It hadn’t been necessary to get the jewelry we’d been after.

  “Yeah, I have late ones tonight,” I lied. “When can I see you again?”

  “Well, since you have a much busier schedule than I do, I’m happy to work around what works best for you.”

  “How about we grab a bite when I’m done at work?” I asked. “I’m done at eight. Too late for you?”

  “Definitely not too late. You wanna come pick me up when you’re done and then we’ll go somewhere?”

  I spotted Jose walking toward me through the crowds inside the Whiskey then. “Sounds good. Hey, I’ve gotta go. My client’s coming.”

  We said good-bye right as Jose was standing in front of me. His face was flushed.