The question wasn't supposed to make me feel stupid or unworldly. But those questions always struck a little cord of insecurity in my soul. Because he was my guide. My Guardian.
And knowing I couldn't survive out here without him kept reestablishing how weak I was. I slid my gaze to watch him study the cool water he trickled over my shoulder. “No.”
His brown gaze glided to mine.
Studying me. Or sending confusing messages. Regardless of the type of awareness dancing in those eyes, his stare only reaffirmed my insecurities. He simply thoughtfully kept his comments to himself when thinking about my reliance on him for survival.
A knowing smile stretched his red beard and moustache. “The world is full of incredible sights upriver. You'll see a few more before we reach the Black Hills.”
“I hope so.” Even if only to repay him for his attempt to give me something to look forward to seeing when he could have rubbed in I knew nothing. That I needed him. But he wasn't trying to make me feel dependent upon him to stay with him any longer. He obviously understood our bond went beyond basic survival. Yet, even in his actions of bathing me, something more special than mere survival resonated. His actions proved he wanted more between us. More than fucking and a woman making things easier for him each day. And I could have hugged him to death for that kindness.
Bubbles frothed where he rubbed the beige soap between his strong hands.
His gaze had strayed across the river. “You know,” he glided his slick lathered palms over my shoulder and down my arm, “we can live anywhere you like. If a place strikes you as pleasing.” He didn't look at me, just kept covering me in froth. “Anyplace that appeals to you. Just tell me where. Out here, it's better to live somewhere you want to see when you walk out your door.”
I probably should feel like a child the way he bathed me. Scold him for babying me. But he was so careful to ensure I didn't smell because of him. The big oaf. Something was up his sleeve. “Alright.”
He met my gaze then. “I want you to be happy, Beauty.”
“Can't you tell I am with you?”
He scooped up another cup of water and slowly poured the cool liquid across my shoulder.
Like he cleansed something else away.
“Yes,” he said.
That's all he intended to say. Toying with me undoubtedly. But I loved his wit. He made me laugh. Often. And shared so much about the world I wouldn't know unless he teased me. He had to feel more connected us than his Wolf's mating bond.
“You're quiet, sweetness.” His hands kept kneading my skin.
“Just thinking.”
“Oh no. A woman in thought could start a war.” He chuckled.
I snorted a scold at him. “Not with men trying to run the world.”
He grinned and rinsed more of me. “That's right. Women just get between men.” He winked.
What did that mean? Other than the obvious. “That's where I'd be right now if you hadn't taken care of me, Brutus.”
His gaze stayed glued to his working hands.
Hands that slid up both sides of my neck, cupped my cheeks. Thumbs that gently rubbed my cheeks.
He finally looked into my eyes, his thumbs still rubbing small delicate circles. “That's the way things were meant to be.”
Everything melded together into one cohesive thought. I knew he loved me. How could he not the way he doted on me? But he hadn't said the words. Would he ever? “You're a loner,
Brutus. And I'm what you've despised for so long. A Normal. Is it the marking that makes us so tolerant and happy with each other?”
He struggled with a budding smile, swirling the pads of his thumbs up my temples to my forehead, acting busy. “The marking merely declares to Shifters that you are mine through scent.” He winked again. “And helps Wolf find you if we're separated. The rest, it's something else.”
“The rest?”
He ran a fingertip down the slope of my nose and shot me a half-cocked smile. “The way your eyes tear up when you ask me these questions. The way your heart chokes and sputters when you tighten your hold on me in the saddle. The way you sigh whenever you ask a question, and I give you the answer.” He dipped the cup back in the murky water.
Water swirled around the silver metal.
Maybe I was his cup, needing answers, wishing I could have them but finding there was only one way the answers could fill me. But he was teasing me with the clues only he could sense with his Wolf senses. Especially when I didn't have the luxury of sensing those things about him. Maybe he'd confess if I pestered him long enough? “I don't have your Shifter senses. I
can't tell what you're thinking.”
“You can't?” He grinned.
Teasing me again. I rolled my eyes at his twisted smile.
He chuckled softly. “Tilt your head back.”
Why not? It's not like he would ever just give me a straight answer. I closed my eyes.
He poured cool water over my face. “I think you read me extremely well, Beauty.”
Interesting. I wiped the water from my eyes and watched him. “Before that day in the swimming pool, I couldn't read a damned thing on your poker face.”
He nodded stoically. “But things are different now.” His serious mask grew playful. “Now, we are mated for life. We accept each other. And we enjoy each other's company.”
Did I have to say it? How do I even phrase the issue? “Are we in love?”
His mouth curled down in a contemplative smile. “I never mated before. So, all I can answer is that if we aren't in love, this is what love should feel like. Two souls always happy together.”
How could Brutus be such a ruthless warrior, a loner who needed nobody, and talk like a philosopher? Had somebody taught him to think this way? How long had it taken him to learn to look at life from this contemplative perspective? I really knew very little about him. Like his age.
“I see a million questions dancing in those green eyes, Beauty.”
Fine. He'll hear them even better then. “Who taught you to think so deeply?”
He rubbed up more lather and soaped his chest.
My muscles. I swatted his palms away and took over.
He snorted, leaned back on his palms, and allowed me to wash through the red hairs on his chest. “Well, little Normal seductress.” He choked on a laugh.
I swatted his shoulder. “That's not funny, Brutus.”
“When my cock towers like a flagpole, you'll know I wasn't joking.”
Oh. I smacked his chest again. “Who taught you to think like a philosopher?”
“Shifters are trained in science.”
Really? Titus hadn't told me much about what Shifters knew. “What kind?”
“Of science?” His red eyebrows arched. “You know there are different kinds of science, don't you?”
Like I was stupid. “Yes. Yale's tutor taught his daughter and I. We studied biology, astronomy, geology, and chemistry. And enough physics to make sense out of all of it. I don't want to win the Nobel Peace Prize, but I know science isn't just one big pot of soup. It's a mixture of all the lumps in a stew.”
He nodded. “Well, Shifters learn to think intellectually.”
“Okay. Since we don't know much about each other, how old are you?”
“Thirty.”
Not a bad age for a woman who wanted a seasoned warrior for a spouse.
“Your pattering heart is telling me you're thinking something else, Beauty.”
His eyes had slipped into glowing Shifter mode. The sneak. “That's not fair. You get to read my mind, and I get to grasp at Brutus straws.”
He waved a dismissive hand. “Trust me. It causes more problems than provides solutions.”
How? “Doesn't it help you know when danger nears? Or when your mate requires your undivided attention?”
He grabbed my armpits and grinned. “Oh yes. For a man, the power is amazing. He can read his woman's needs.”
Could he be serious? “Brutus! We're cle
an. No sex. Just answer the question.”
He burst into laughter. “You,” he touched the tip of my nose, “do not know how long it's been since I have laughed as much as I have since I met you.”
That could be a compliment. “Oh?” I scooped up a cupful of water and rinsed his shoulder.
He released me and leaned back.
Baring all. The nest of red hair around his not-quite-so-relaxed cock. Relaxed enough to allow me to finish bathing him though.
“I think we are the perfect match, Lorelei.”
He was always serious when he used my name. The name from my past life. Like he tried to connect with the true me. The person who died that day when the extermination ray vaporized all the people living above ground in New Pittsburgh. I'd died and been reborn. Into
The Wild. Most Normals would say I'd been sentenced to Hell in becoming a Shifter mate. But nobody could convince me that I hadn't found a better life. Even in simply living in the saddle on the run looking for a place to live.
“You're quiet,” he said absolutely implication-free.
Watching me with impenetrable brown eyes. Why? Did he suddenly doubt me in my silence?
Couldn't the things he read in my posture or pulse tell him the things he truly needed to know to understand my feelings? “I don't care all those people died because of me. Nor do I want to go back to that life. To all the things I had, the lies. I think I love you, Brutus. But it doesn't matter if this isn't love. I'll take this kind of happy with you.”
His indomitable poker face never wavered. “Nobody's taking you back, Beauty.”
[Back to Table of Contents]
* * *
Chapter Eleven
Brutus studied the open gateway in the walled palisade of the Shifter sanctuary while Beauty
sat quietly behind the saddle. A Guardian walked the scaffolding just inside the left of the gate. A younger clansman probably proving his merit. But I couldn't see any other men.
Hopefully, the men were out hunting. If they were upstream, we could get stuck here waiting for the damned boat.
“Well?” Beauty's grasp tightened around my chest.
Wiggling for a better look. “Let's go.”
The path to the gateway was worn but not beaten to death. Good. Not many people visited this outpost.
“What do I need to worry about?”
Only a fool would bother another Shifter's mate. But there could be Normals in the mix now.
“I haven't been here in three years. I suppose the Guardians occupying this post are the same. But anyone could have joined or left.”
“Normals?”
“I thought you couldn't read my mind?”
She chuckled. “All I have to do is see where you're going with a statement to predict the destination.”
“Just always stay close to me. I don't want us to be separated.”
“What makes you think I'll be wandering off?”
Nothing really. “I just don't want you to walk around a corner to see something and turn around to find I'm not there. Women are the most sought after possession out here. If there's a Normal desperate enough to risk Wolf's vengeance, then there's always a possibility for idiocy. And nobody, even someone who just touches your arm, won't be spared Wolf's revenge. We can't allow temptation to create a scene that will indicate we've passed this way if Yale arrives.”
“Okay. I've got this pistol too.”
So she would find the wherewithal to use it. “Don't forget the knife. But if luck is with us, we'll be on the Gods-be-damned boat after sunset.”
We reached the outpost's entrance and the young warrior who glared down at us.
The scowl was probably more from the bright sunlight causing him to squint than suspicion or angst. His face and leaner build of a youth weren't from a person I could place.
“Who are you?” he demanded from his lofty post.
Given he had the vantage point, an M-16, and a clear shot at Beauty and I, it would be best to just answer. “Brutus. Seeking sanctuary for the night. Does Kodiak still head this post?”
The Shifter nodded and thrust his chin back toward the buildings. “He's busy with a problem back in the main lodge. Wouldn't interrupt, if I were you, even though your reputation precedes you.”
Smart kid. He'll probably live one long-ass life and wind up running this outpost.
“On second thought, maybe your mate can help,” the kid yelled.
“What does he mean?” Beauty whispered.
“She's not a healer,” I yelled back.
“Not that kind of help. The baby's already here. Kodiak can't please his son.”
Son? The bear mated? “So who shall I tell him sent us?”
“Lynx.”
The perfect name for a Shifter who could stand to put on a few pounds of muscle. I steered
Trance into the compound.
Little in the way of machinery filled the log walls. Just two motorcycles and a windmill. They probably used the windmill to produce electricity since they were feet from the river. The central lodge jutted two stories into the blue sky. Around the log and mortar structure were smaller single-room cabins like the one Beauty slept in that night I gave her the pistol. But she won't need that weapon with a baby. “Do you know much about babies?”
“Any woman raised in a mansion does. All a warlord's men prefer spending their time making bastards.”
Nice hint of hatred for Normal males in her tone. “Well, this son is well-loved. I'd venture to say you're about to make the clan leader a happy father.”
Her chest jiggled with a smothered laugh. “Men.”
Go ahead and despise all the men in the world. Mine. Mine. Mine, Little Sassy. I pulled Trance to a stop at the bottom of the two broad wooden steps leading up to the door. The shrill cries inside could have waken the dead halfway across the world.
“Uh-oh. You better let me down.” She squirmed, trying to hook one leg between our bodies to slip out of the saddle.
“Just a minute.” I hopped to the ground and helped her down.
“You know, I can dismount.” She blinked quickly a few times.
Not unless I want her to though. She probably wasn't up for sex jokes. “I bet you can.”
Her blinking halted with a suspicious pinch.
Her sweet mind was working through my comment to find multiple meanings.
The baby screeched louder.
She turned to the racket and hurried around Trance's head.
Women and babies. “I'll go first, Lorelei.”
She stepped aside to permit me to pound a fist on the roughly-hewn wooden slab of the door.
“Alright. Alright! I can't take this anymore. Someone answer the Gods-be-damned door.”
Kodiak didn't sound too interested in guests.
The door creaked, swinging inward.
A young girl of about ten years squinted up at me in a plaid shirt and blue jeans. “It's a large man, sir. Shaved head. Must be a Shifter.”
Interesting wording, formal speech, from a short girl with two black braids.
“What in the hell is he beating my door down for? Doesn't everyone know my son is trying to sleep?” The whining door swung wider, producing the big brunette's scowl and shoulderlength clan leader's hair. “Brutus! Is that you?” His face split with an enormous grin full of pristine teeth.
Teeth of a Shifter. Wearing nothing but camouflage pants meant he had little wealth to clothe himself as one. Not likely. More like the large warrior was at wit's end. “Yes. And the guard at the gate says you'll be happy to see my mate.” I stepped aside and wrapped an arm around her shoulder.
“Gods save us!” Kodiak waved her indoors. “Come in. Come in. Show us what to do with a baby.”
She flicked a gaze between Kodiak and I.
“Let's go see.” I stepped into the cabin's cool internal shadows, drawing on Wolf's vision to see the six young warriors watching me from where they leaned against walls, sat on benches, and tried to act in
different to the auditory squalor.
Tension pulled so tightly in the air that I wasn't going to put Wolf away until I learned what caused this miserable scene. For Beauty's sake.
Sunlight shifted behind me.
Beauty stepped into the room, pausing beside the clan head. “Mr. Kodiak.”
“Please come in,” he begged. “Don't worry about the boys. They're ready to run for the hills but fear I'll rip them to shreds when I catch their useless tails.”
Typical clan head keeping his clan in line.
She suddenly blinked, scanning the room as if her vision acclimated to the low-level lighting.
She spotted the crib and turned to Kodiak. “May I?”
“Please. Please.” Kodiak shut the door at my heels. “Had no idea you were headed back this way, Brutus.”
Beauty crossed through the empty center of the room, heading directly for the awful sound.
Hopefully, she could quiet the child. “Never know where I'm heading.” True enough. Just look at how I wound up with Beauty.
She stopped at the crib and reached for the squalling bundle.
“Didn't think you were the mating type,” Kodiak muttered softly.
As if I was any different from his big tail. “You took one too?”
His straight-lipped smile curled down on one side. “Cabin fever last year. Took me hard. My
Wolf was tearing through the Missouri Territory until it halted me at her door. Best Gods-bedamned thing I ever experienced.” He cleared his throat. “Until the baby arrived.”
“Oh!” Beauty held the crying bundle against her shoulder and scoffed at Kodiak. “Don't blame him if you don't know anything about babies.” She bounced the baby lightly, patting its back.
The room quieted.
The smothering tension dissipated like someone flipped a switch. Everyone watched Beauty pace a humming dance for the baby.
“I tried that,” Kodiak muttered.
Beauty shot him a mask of disbelief never breaking a note in her hum.
“You and I never were much for singing,” I whispered. “Better keep your voice down so you don't set off another caterwauling episode.”
He nodded.
“Where's the mother?” Lorelei asked quickly and went back to mesmerizing the baby.
Beauty and the Brute [Werescape III] Page 15
