Regretting Redemption

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Regretting Redemption Page 10

by Bonnie R. Paulson


  Who was he kidding? He couldn’t stop.

  ~~~

  Holding the scratch paper covered in tight script, Ian wandered the aisles of the small grocery store in town. He’d woken earlier that morning to find a list beside his breakfast plate of things Nana Nell needed. Her back was acting up again and the Epsom salts weren’t doing their job. He didn’t miss the sneakily added bag of quilt stuffing at the bottom of her small list.

  He suspected she wanted that and the rest was an excuse.

  “Well, well, if it isn’t Ian Dawson.” Lisa stopped him as he reached for the largest bag of polyester stuffing.

  He grabbed the bag and shoved it in his cart. “Lisa, how are you?”

  She smiled, then grew somber. “I’m great. How’s my sister?”

  How much did the two women talk? And if they talked often, how much did they share? They didn’t seem like normal sisters, at least not like he and his own sister had been. Fighting and playing and fighting some more when they were little. The huge part of him that wondered daily what their relationship would be like as he and Elena grew older reared its melancholy head. He didn’t answer.

  “That bad, huh? Don’t worry, it’s not you. If she’s back with Edward…” She sighed. “I don’t know why she stays with that loser. He’s worse than Devlyn, you know? Like he has an agenda or something, so he’s not letting his true self show, just little spurts of anger here and there.” She shook her head and faced the other side of the aisle where kitchen utensils and other practical items lined the shelves.

  The store was so small, even the sewing supplies didn’t warrant their own section.

  “Still with Edward? I thought they broke up or something.” Ian thrust his jaw to the side. What was Lisa playing at? He’d been with Mary the night before, not more than twelve hours. The kiss she’d given Ian had been anything but misleading.

  Mary was into Ian and he knew it. There was no way she was back with Edward.

  “She said she’d marry him. She sticks to what she says. I don’t think she loves him, but she wants a family so bad… She won’t turn down the chance to be with him.” Lisa faked a smile, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “I don’t know. She left my place a few nights ago when we were out at Lonely Rivers. She was pretty upset. I figured she went back to Edward since she hasn’t even talked to me. He never let her speak to anyone. He even made the doctor appointments and called any businesses she needed. He didn’t even live with her, and yet he somehow managed to keep her under his thumb.”

  Lisa focused on Ian, her eyes sad and her smile gone. “I’m worried if she stays with him and goes through with the wedding, I’ll never get a chance to have her back again.”

  Confusion scratched its way through Ian’s chest. This was too much rejection to slam him in the chest all at once. He scratched his forehead. “So you’re saying she’s still with him? Or you don’t know? We just went out last night.” He didn’t know which was worse. Looking back on the night before, why else would Edward chase her down, unless he had some hope they were together? Nothing made sense.

  Mary wasn’t the type of woman to lead guys on, especially when she didn’t love someone. But then again, Ian wasn’t certain about that, either. He didn’t know her as well as he wanted to.

  Oh, man, there he was pursuing some lady who had baggage she hadn’t unloaded yet. He did this every time. Every time! When was he going to learn?

  He sought out girls who reminded him of his sister, tried to save them, tried to be their knight in shining armor.

  Lisa glanced at his face. Horror widened her eyes. “No, Ian, I’m sure she’s not with him. Why would she be, right? I’m sure Mary is smarter than that.” But her voice trailed off and she glanced away again.

  They fell into an uncomfortable silence, not awkward, just a silence filled with pain as they both acknowledged to themselves that most people in those situations were smart, they just refused to acknowledge they were being manipulated. Most didn’t realize it before it was too late, and they never escaped.

  Ian’s sister had been that statistic. Lisa knew it. And Ian knew it.

  “Am I interrupting?” A tall man with dark brown eyes stopped in their aisle, looking from Lisa to Ian and back.

  Lisa’s jaw ticked. “No, Agent Mendez, you’re just not welcome.”

  A sneer revealed startling white teeth and the new man nodded. “Ah, Lisa, there’s so much you don’t know about me.” He took in Ian and Lisa speaking in confidence. “Well, I find this interesting. You’re here. Both of you. Where does that leave Mary?” He glared at Lisa. “I told you to get the sisters here, and I meant it. That doesn’t mean you leave Mary unattended so that scheming thief, Edward, can have time to work on her.”

  “Hey, what my sisters do with their private lives doesn’t concern you.” Lisa crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes.

  “Really? Don’t you get it? I’m not the only one trying to solve this case. I just found out Edward is after Mary’s money. He thinks she knows where Caracus’s treasure is. He’s going to marry her and he doesn’t have much time left before you and your sisters’ claims will be moot. Once the statute of limitations expires, nobody gets any of the money, found or not.”

  He glared. “I’m telling you. He’s not going to let her get away. Not for a fraction of that amount of money.” Mendez checked his watch, tapping the face as he raised his gaze to them again. “Get her away from him. I don’t want to lose any more time or information on this case, Trinkett. Do what you promised. Now.” He bit off the last word, lunging away from them as he hurried from the store.

  Stunned, Ian grabbed another bag of quilt stuffing and placed it in the cart.

  Mendez had dumped more information on them in seconds than Ian could believe in a week. The agent had been so certain Edward was going to marry her. But she didn’t know he was after something besides her. “I don’t understand. I thought they were only engaged?” He flinched at the rawness of his voice.

  Lisa shook her head. “I don’t know the details. But Edward is controlling. He’s torn up her apartment more times than she will admit. He destroyed all of her precious figurines from when she was growing up and demanded she only wear skirts. I’m not sure how many injuries she’s had because of him or how severe.” She leaned her head back, staring at the ceiling. “We haven’t been close in quite a while, but I’m going to change that. And I don’t know what’s going on, but I’m going to find out.”

  “Let me know what you come up with, okay?” Ian walked numbly away. He’d already started losing his heart to Mary. Having this dropped on him ached. He was worried about her. She needed help, but did she want it?

  He wanted to save her, wanted to be the reason she got away from the creep, but would she turn to him when she was ready for more than friendship?

  But saving her might be more important than keeping her.

  Ian had a lot to think about, but first he needed to buy things to keep Nana Nell occupied and oblivious to his puzzling love life, or lack thereof.

  The last thing he needed was a “love expert” telling him how to fix things he wasn’t sure he could… or wanted… to fix.

  Chapter 17

  Mary

  Mary couldn’t stand still. All morning she’d danced around her house, cleaning up the dust and ceramic particles from the shattered pieces of her dishes Edward had launched across the room in his tantrum. She wasn’t even angry, like she would normally be.

  Instead, she wasn’t even thinking about Edward.

  Edward, who?

  Ian filled her thoughts. She randomly touched her lower lip where he’d kissed her, his lips insistent, but gentle. She twirled, her hands pressed to her chest as she recalled his hands on her back.

  The man was getting to her and that was saying a lot.

  She didn’t need music to play. Her own rhythm filled her steps and she moved about the house with leaps and small tip-toes. Arms flitting and fluttering, she closed her eyes and moved
with the music in her mind.

  Applause filled the house of one solitary person.

  Mary lurched to a halt, almost tripping as she stopped too fast. She spun, arms akimbo. “Edward.” She was downright livid he’d entered her home uninvited, but she had to keep her cool. He got excited when she showed any reaction to him. “Why are you here?”

  “You gave me a key, remember?” He flashed the shine of a silver house key before tucking it into the front pocket of his jeans. Jeans that, after seeing Ian fill out a pair, just didn’t look right.

  She nodded, glancing wildly about her living room for an escape. Yet, she’d never been able to escape him. He always had the upper hand and the familiar chill of dread worked itself into the back of her throat.

  He turned his face as he watched her, throwing bright purple bruising on his cheek into the sunlight pouring through the window. Her fear faded. She wasn’t hopeless. He couldn’t make her feel that way anymore.

  Edward held out his hand, supplicating with pouting lips. “Honey, come on. We fought last night, right? That’s all it was.” His mouth thinned into a tight line. “I know you only stayed with that idiot because you were trying to make me jealous.”

  He stepped toward her. “Well, it worked. I’m so jealous, it hurts. I miss you, Mary. It’s time to put all this behind us and start planning our wedding. Didn’t you say you wanted that small white church in Colby? I got it. I even called your mom and invited her.” He softened his expression, holding out his hand. “It’s been so long since you saw her, let’s get married today. I can’t think of a better reason for a reunion.”

  Confused at what was happening, Mary drew her eyebrows together. Had she agreed to marry him again? He spoke as if she’d forgiven him and they’d moved forward in less than a ten second time span. She thought hard. Had she done something to indicate they were back together? Had she agreed to his crazy plans?

  Think, Mary, focus. Had she given him any hint she agreed with him? No, she’d stayed silent.

  Maybe that was the problem. She wasn’t making herself heard. She wouldn’t regret another moment with him. She shook her head. “No.”

  Edward jerked back, like she slapped him. Hurt darkened his eyes. “No, you don’t want your mom there? Honey-babe, that’s taking your grudges a little far, don’t you think? Our wedding is going to be spectacular and a once in a lifetime event. You don’t want your mom to miss something that important, right?” He moved closer, his words moving like liquid.

  What was she doing? “This is too fast. We need to talk about how you treat me.” Wait, that wasn’t assertive enough. He wasn’t going to let her get her meaning out.

  He moved even closer. “Shh. Enough talking. Let’s get married right now. I love you. I’ve never wanted anything as much as I want us married. Please, Mary. Don’t let everyone down. Everyone wants us to be happy and together.” Edward moved closer still, placing his hands on her shoulders.

  His touch didn’t cause her to quiver and overheat, instead she shivered – and not in a good way. A bitter taste broke out on her tongue. She moved to the door, suddenly free from his persuasive speech. “Edward, I would like you to leave. I’m not interested in marrying you anymore. We aren’t a good fit.” Mary opened the door, the warm summer day spilling into the room, lighting up the dust motes dancing between them.

  Edward’s face darkened, even in the sunlight. “You listen to me—”

  “Mary? Is everything alright?” Mary’s mother stood on the front stoop, a basket brimming with bright red, green, orange, and yellow fruits and vegetables. She stared Edward down, her gaze steady and unwavering.

  “Yes, Mom. Edward was just leaving.” Mary peered pointedly at Edward as she held open the door.

  His face stone-set, he walked past the two women, nodding his head curtly at the older woman. Mary rolled her eyes and welcomed Cheri inside.

  “Is that the infamous Edward? The one you want to spend the rest of your life with?” Her mother watched his truck peel out, gravel spraying across the faded pavement.

  “Yes, that’s him and, no, I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with him anymore.” Mary snorted. She waited for her mom to enter then let the door close on the over-bright day.

  “Oh? You seemed so certain about him when you visited. I was hoping you would be happy.” Her mother really did seem crestfallen as she set the basket on Mary’s side table and clasped her fingers together.

  Mary approached her mom, poking through the basket as she said, “I’m not sure what that will mean, but I’m starting to figure out I don’t need a guy to make me happy. I need to be happy with myself first and then I can choose the man I want to be happy with.” She chuckled at herself. “That’s a lot of happies to say all at once, I’m trying to figure out what all of this means.”

  “I understand.” Her expression wistful, Cheri pointed at the overflowing basket. “I brought these for you. Since Devlyn was convicted, I started gardening. I’m, well, I’m actually quite good at it.” Her cheeks flushed and she lifted her chin. “I’m trying to figure some things out myself.”

  “They look delicious. Would you stay and have a salad with me?” Mary didn’t want to wait on the periphery of formality with her mom forever. She wanted the easygoing nature she’d seen in other mother-daughter relationships over the years. The only way that would happen was if she pushed them together as often as she had the chance.

  Lunch was a terrific way to start.

  “I would like to, thank you.” Her mother stood and crossed to the sink, tugging the basket along beside her. “Have you had a chance to go through your father’s box?”

  “Honestly? I’m not quite ready yet.” Mary avoided her mom’s gaze as she dug through the fridge. She hadn’t even really had this conversation with herself. Admitting it to her mom was taking a huge leap of faith and determination to have what she wanted.

  Her mom slowed as she rinsed a loose-leaf head of lettuce. “Why not?”

  Tears pricked Mary’s eyes. She choked on her words, but forged ahead. “I’m not sure he is who I thought he was.”

  “Mary, come here.” Her mother moved to sit at the table, waiting patiently for Mary to join her.

  Once Mary sat down, slumping a little in the straight-backed chairs, her mother continued. “Why have your feelings for your father changed?”

  “Because he was so terrible to so many people, even you.” Her words burst out like a dam, like she had no idea what she was going to say and they formed themselves and leapt from her mouth.

  “I’m not going to say terrible things about your father, even if I do hate him. He’s your dad and that’s it. I’ve loved him longer than I hated him. Your experience with him shouldn’t be ruined by how he treated others.” Her mother took her hand and caressed the back of Mary’s knuckles with her fingertips.

  Her words failed to comfort Mary. “What about his other daughters? I feel bad.”

  Her mother leaned back, considering Mary for a long moment. “Why? It’s not your fault. It’s Devlyn’s. Don’t let them make you feel guilty for something you had no control over.”

  “No, they aren’t, it’s just how I feel. They don’t seem to blame me, you know? Dad was awful to them. He was terrible to a lot of people and the more stories I hear the more he becomes this faceless man who wanted only to hurt people.”

  “Wait, you need to stop right there. Your dad didn’t do those things. Devlyn Caracus did.” Her mother patted her hand.

  “They’re the same person.” Mary’s anxiety swelled within her. Not only had she lost her father, but now her mom was going crazy.

  “I know that, but not to you. Devlyn Caracus treated people horribly. Even hurt me. But your dad? He was pretty great to you, wasn’t he?” She watched Mary like she waited for her to pick up on something, like it was a great secret the universe would drop between them any second.

  What was Mary missing? “Yeah, he was great, but how to I correlate that man to the one
everyone else knew?”

  “You need to realize they aren’t the same guy, Mary. Once you accept that, things will get a lot easier for you.” Cheri smiled softly and patted Mary’s shoulder as she stood. “Let’s make that salad.” She manned the sink, washing more of the vegetables which already had a washed appearance with shiny skins and vibrant colors. “You don’t want to marry Edward anymore.” She didn’t ask, but stated it, like they’d left off on that part of the conversation and needed to return.

  “Well, yeah. Edward wants to get married, right now.” Mary retrieved forks and plates from her locked cupboard, the one Edward hadn’t ravaged yet.

  “And? I thought your goal was to get married.” Cheri moved the vegetables to the plastic cutting board to the side of the sink.

  Mary laughed at the reminder of her life’s pursuit since she was about three. “It was. It is. I just… He reminds me of Dad.”

 

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