Pulling on his shirt, the distinct feeling of dread churned in his stomach. He had tried to muster up the courage to ask Raeve the single most important question he could think of, and chickened out everytime he tried to ask. How could he ask her to marry him, knowing there was a strong chance that he might not return to say his vows? His skin felt tight and suffocating as he jammed his feet into his shitkickers. Time was waning, and fear assailed him as he began to realize he didn’t have the guts to ask her what he needed to. His eyes stayed locked onto one thing: Raeve. He drank in the sight of her dainty frame as she sinuously slipped into her dark jeans and her favorite black tank top. God, he was going to miss this. He was going to miss watching her sway and twist her hips to music as she put on her make-up, and her twirling around him in the kitchen while they cooked.
Shutting his eyes, he fought back a round of hot tears. The air grew as thick as pea-soup with anxiety, suffocating him with the cold reality of his life. Stuffing his bag, he watched every move she made, refusing to let her slip past his sight for even the briefest of moments. “Raeve…” His voice trembled, and his hands shook, as he climbed to his feet. The only thing that felt remotely right was pulling her close and locking her in his arms. “I love you,” he whispered into her hair, inhaling her sweet jasmine scent. “Please don’t ever forget that.” Aidan felt his heart jump in his throat. He tried to speak again, but words failed to come out. What more was there to say anyway?
Chapter Seventeen
The drive to the airport seemed to fly by, but the speedometer barely registered fifty miles per hour. Raeve knew she was dragging out the inevitable, driving slower than normal, but she wasn’t ready to let him go. She felt so fragile, like she was on the verge of slipping off a shelf and shattering into a million unrecognizable pieces. The silence was deafening as they got off the Sky-harbor airport exit.
She couldn’t tell if the heat of the day had started in, the cold that prickled her skin left her numb to everything. Pushing back a long tendril of loose hair, she couldn’t brave a glance at him. Fearing that she would crack if he looked into her eyes in that way he did, with the intensity of his love and tenderness shining, she would crumble.
Aidan brushed his hand over hers, and Raeve felt the first of the shuddering breaths that ebbed on verge of sobbing. Slowing to turn at the entrance he needed, she couldn’t stop her hands from shaking, as she gripping the leather bound steering wheel tighter for support. Putting the car in park took every ounce of her strength. Inside she was screaming, ready to say ‘Fuck it’ and drive off until they ran out of gas. Looking at the gas gauge, she realized her plan was already thwarted by the blinking ‘low fuel’ light.
“Shit,” she muttered. The silence started to suffocate her, even though the windows were down, she couldn’t inhale enough air.
Aidan slowly climbed out of the truck, and. she knew she wouldn’t last. It was just a matter of minutes before she broke down completely and sobbed like a baby. Regret kicked around in her head. Breaking down into tears was the last thing she really wanted to do. She didn’t want him to remember this goodbye like that, her shaking and crying as he kissed her goodbye. Just the idea that this could be their final goodbye was a thought that sank her heart like the Titanic. Biting down hard on her lip, she fought back every thought that ended with him never returning to her. Swallowing hard against the boulder size lump in her throat, she found it growing more difficult to steel herself against the inevitable.
“Raeve…” His deep voice seemed to tremble as he broke her out of her reverie.
The echoing of car engines bouncing off the concrete walls and din of voices from people saying their goodbyes seemed to disappear the second he touched her hand. It wasn’t fair, she had said goodbye to him too many times already and didn’t want this to be the last time. Her lip hurt from the amount of gnawing she was doing as she pulled her hand back to unlock her door and step out to give him a proper goodbye.
Her knees felt weak as she stumbled around the back of the truck. His bag sat by his feet as he watched her carefully walk to him. The moment she was within reach, she lunged for him. Wrapping her arms around his neck, Raeve buried her face deep in his stony chest. The hot salty tears trickled down her cheeks, as she sucked in a heavy breath.
“I don’t know how to say goodbye.” Looking back up to him, she saw the mirror image of her pain in his beautiful ocean blue gaze. The watery streaks that danced down his face and the sullen gaze sank her heart.
His thumb gently caressed her tears away. His brilliant eyes swam in the sadness that marred their hearts.
“I love you.” The words tumbled out of her lips, shattering the silence between them.
Circling her with his arms, his hand brushed back the tendrils of her black hair. Brushing his warm lips against her cheek he whispered back, “I love you too,” as he embraced her tightly.
The world disappeared around them, the din of voices and whirling of engines disintegrated when he lifted her chin, meeting her watery eyes as more salty traitors trailed streaks down her cheeks. “I don’t want to lose you,” she murmured.
There weren’t any words that could ease her or enough reassurances he could offer. Brushing his smooth, warm lips over hers, his silent vow to return to her was sealed in his kiss.
“You will never lose me. I will always be with you. Always till eternity.” As he sank deep into the kiss, Raeve prayed he could feel every ounce of love pour through her. Lingering for endless moments, as they consumed each other in a long passionate kiss, the edges of Raeve’s heart started to crack. His fingers cupped her cheek, tangling with her dark fallen locks as she held on to him for dear life. There was no rise of lust brimming in her body as she arched into him for a deeper taste. No, this was just a kiss, one perfect kiss for her to hold on to for endless nights and everlasting days until he returned to her.
The suffocating lack of time weighed heavily on their final moments. Was this to be their final kiss, their last embrace? She hoped not. Hope was all she had left. Her arms reluctantly pulled free from his hold. The instant wash of coldness that assailed her was like an arctic breeze on a hot desert day. Her fingers caressed his cheek, thumbing down and across his lips as her other hand clutched his dog-tag in her trembling palm. “Keep yourself safe. Promise me that.”
With a nod, he silently agreed to her request. “I’ll do everything in my power, my love.” His voice hitched as he spoke, and she realized with a sickening fear it was a promise he couldn’t keep. Pressing one last kiss to her warm, supple lips, Aidan lingered.
She thanked God for the little moments as he took his time tasting her, as she did with him. Her heart started to crack as she felt him reluctantly pull away. The small fissures that had been building were now on the verge of splitting wide open.
“I’ll come back to you, sweetheart.” His warm palm caressed her cheek, as his eyes promised her what his heart wanted.
Tears began to sting the backs of her eyes as he pulled his luggage from the back of the truck. Raeve opened her mouth to plead with him, but there was nothing left to say. Everything they had to say had been said in tear filled moments the night before.
His deep voice rumbled with a final promise, “I’ll do everything in my power. I love you, sweetheart.”
When Raeve finally found the words she wanted to say, they caught in her throat. She wanted to beg and plead with him to stay, to just refuse to let him go. But this is what he did. It’s who he was. He was a protector, and she was the healer. His healer. The hard click of the truck latch attaching to its lock reminded her of the love she was locking deep in her heart for him, keeping it safe until he returned.
“I love you too.” She forced a painful looking smile. Leaning against the back of her truck, Raeve felt herself coming undone as she wrapped her arms tightly over her chest to keep the pieces from spilling out over the asphalt. Clutching his tags in her palm, she wanted to shut out the world and drown her sorrows down a bottle of
Grey Goose as the first wave of tears started to trickle down her cheeks.
“I’ll be waiting for you. Always till eternity,” she promised.
“That’s what I was hoping you’d say.” His voice hitched as his knowing promise edged around his smirk. Pressing one last kiss to her glossy lips, he slowly pulled away taking his warmth with him. “I’ll come back to you, sweetheart.”
Raeve noticed his hands trembling as he stepped back from her. He looked like he was about to walk barefoot over live grenades as sweat started to bead along his brow.
***
Aidan sucked in a deep breath and steeled himself to do the one thing he had been dying to do since he first saw her at the airport. His hands shook as he dug into his coat pocket to pull free the one thing he had hoped would convince her he would return to her. The small velvet box suddenly felt strange as he pulled it free.
“Raeve,” His chest grew tight as he sank down to one knee. Sweat beads trickled from his brow as he pulled off his Oakleys. Gently coaxing her hand to him, he looked longingly into her watery gaze and prayed his life was about to change for a better future. A future he had laid awake many nights and envisioned. “Raeve, I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember. I was hoping I could do this more smoothly, but…” Popping the small black box open, he brought it up for her to see. “You’ve broken me and turned around to heal me like no other. I can’t imagine my life without you, I don’t want to.”
He could feel her hand shaking in his; hear her heart racing as she sucked in a ragged breath. His heart thundered against his chest, as he watched her reaction. “Sweetheart, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?” The words flowed effortlessly from his quivering lips.
A moment hadn’t passed before Raeve fell into his arms. Her soft sobs as she kissed him feverishly rocked him to his bones. “Yes! Aidan, oh my god, yes!”
Blowing out a heavy sigh of relief, his smile sliced wide across his face. “I’ve been trying to find the right time to do this.” His thick arms closed around her both shaking as he hungrily found her lips. He didn’t hesitate to delve in, tasting her salty tears and relishing every drop. The tighter she wrapped her arms around his neck, the deeper he sank into her kiss, melting into her supple lips. Pulling her up with him as he stood up, her small body felt weightless as he lifted her off the ground. Pulling back to gaze into her eyes, he was momentarily stunned to see the sadness that lived in her eyes had disappeared. The light that beamed back at him warmed every crevice of his heart. “Do you want to try on your ring now?” He laughed, pecking a small kiss to her cheek.
“I―I’m, uh yes! I can’t believe you did this.” Tears threatened to spill from her eyes again, as he set her down.
Cupping her shaking hand, he pulled free a sparkling emerald cut diamond ring and slid it gently down her finger.
“It’s so beautiful!”
“Not nearly as beautiful as you are, sweetheart.” Sliding his hands up to her cheeks, he was mesmerized by this woman who had captured his heart twice and had now promised to be his wife, his future.
Now there were no more words to say as he stared deeply into her eyes, memorizing each little fleck of color. It would be too long before he could cup her face and drown in those beautiful pools for a lifetime. His deep voice rumbled with a final, “I love you, sweetheart.” As he reached down to grab the handle of his luggage, the weight of his leaving made his bag feel like he was suddenly hauling a metric ton.
“I love you too.” she forced a smile that was more fake than hair extensions. Leaning against the back of her truck, the look on Raeve’s face said what he already knew as she sank down on the tailgate for support. Aidan knew what his leaving was doing to her. And damn him if he didn’t hate himself for causing her pain. He heard the faint jingle of his tags in her hands as she clutched them to her chest. Glancing one last time to take in the beauty of the woman he hoped to one day call his wife, he watched as her breath hitched and tears threatened her eyes.
“Goodbye, my love,” she murmured. “I’ll be waiting for you. Always till eternity,” she promised.
***
His heart felt heavy the moment he turned away from Raeve, and he wished to God things were different, wished he could climb back into her truck and drive off into the sunset like an old sappy movie, where happy endings made you teary-eyed. But that wasn’t reality, at least not for him. Lost in a reverie of thought, Aidan fought to keep himself from running back out to the drop off, pulling her into his arms once again, and holding her tightly while devouring her mouth with a kiss that would last a lifetime.
The buzzing of his cell phone as he entered the terminal didn’t surprise him. Smiling, he knew Raeve wouldn’t let him make it to his gate without saying “I love you” once more. Palming his cell he opened his inbox to find his waiting message. Stopping short as he read it, his breath caught like a lump in his throat as he read the message again. “Holy shit!”
Spinning aound he nearly knocked over an elderly woman following closely behind him. He softly apologized for the near collision as he heaved his canvas bag over his shoulder and thundered out to the street. If God, had any love for him, and had granted him his wish, he swore he’d do everything in his power to make Raeve happy for the rest of their lives.
Racing after her, Aidan threw up his free hand, waving wildly as he tried to catch Raeve’s attention.
“Raeve!” he screamed frantically. Running up to the window, his heart nearly broke out of his chest, he could feel the trickle of excitement spread throughout his body like wildfire. “Raeve!” Huffing out a ragged breath, “You can’t leave…not yet.”
“Why? Oh God, what’s wrong, Aidan?” panic rose in her voice as she started to climb out of the driver’s side seat. “What’s going on?”
He wanted to scream to the skies and explain it to her. Instead he slid the phone into her hand and nodded to the screen. “Read this,” he gently commanded.
“Your mission has been aborted. Report back to base in fourteen days.” Lifting her stunned gaze to his, her hands continued to shake. “Does this mean what I think it means? You’re not going overseas?” Her voice didn’t hide the excitement she tried to conceal as she handed the small device back over to him.
Flashing her the biggest grin possible , he laughed out, “Yes!” Scooping her up into his arms, his lips refused to let the small celebration go unnoticed. Crashing his mouth over hers, tears streaked down her cheeks as he crushed her body to his.
For long moments they were lost in their perfect world, even as blaring horns honked their annoyance
“You’re staying? You mean I get to tie you to my bed for the next couple of weeks?”
Smirking at her idea of fun, he shook his head and picked her up off her feet. “I am, now let’s go home, sweetheart. Oh, and I’m driving.”
Her exalted laugh littered the air as she pressed kisses across his jaw and back up to his lips. “So you still wanna marry me?”
“As long as you promise that you’ll be the last woman I ever kiss.” Cupping his cheeks between her palms, her eyes locked onto his as she stilled him. “Always until eternity.”
THE END
About The Author
M.R. Murphy is a Massage Therapist for humans and horses, a photographer, and mechanic when the car needs fixing. Since childhood Murphy found writing to be a therapeutic escape where dreams and thoughts became a written reality. Creating worlds of epic proportions. Born and raised in New Hampshire, Murphy now calls Arizona her home with her two amazing kids, and one silly cat.
In January of 2010, Murphy was on a return flight from New Hampshire and was inspired by the view from the plane while watching the sun descend into the night sky. With laptop in hand and a whole new world began to unfold before her eyes.
Current published works include, Ginn Hunter, Death Becomes Him and Down the Rabbit Hole. Soon to be published, Ever Mine, Eternally Mine and Chronicles of the Dark Angels: Darkest Before
Dawn.
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