Pool and its Role in Asian Communism
By Colin Cotterill
Copyright © Colin Cotterill, 2005
First Published 2005
Smashwords Edition 2012
Published by
Proglen Trading Co., Ltd.
Bangkok Thailand
http://ebooks.dco.co.th
ISBN 9781476218953
All Rights Reserved
This book is a work of fiction. All names, characters, and other elements of the story are either the product of the author's imagination or else are used only fictitiously. Any resemblance to real characters, living or dead, or to real incidents, is entirely coincidental.
Contents
Preface
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
Chapter 47
Chapter 48
Chapter 49
Chapter 50
Chapter 51
Chapter 52
Chapter 53
Chapter 54
Chapter 55
Chapter 56
Chapter 57
Chapter 58
Chapter 59
Chapter 60
Chapter 61
Chapter 62
Chapter 63
Chapter 64
Chapter 65
Chapter 66
Chapter 67
Chapter 68
Chapter 69
Chapter 70
Author's Note
Preface
I'm telling you this story on account of it being personal, on account of us spending this morning at the cemetery, and on account of there ain't no-one else that wants to tell it. So if you care to hear it, looks like you and me's stuck with each other.
I don't say I can tell it as good as it should be told, and I ain't gonna win no No Bell prize, less they got a special section for books that don't got no grammar in them. But it's important it gets told. That's my opinion anyway.
I guess it all started in 1970, before I was born. There's folks wish I wasn't born at all, but it's too late now and I don't want to get on to that.
If you never heard of Indiana, then you sure as hell never would of heard of Mattfield. But this is where the story started. Back then there was a factory here. It sort of give folks a reason for living in Mattfield. Once the plant was gone there weren't a reason no more, and anyone needing work just left. It's kind of quiet now. Fact there's just me.
But this story ain't about now, it's about then. The young guys at the factory, them that couldn't get out of it, was all doing their patriotic duty in Vietnam. Most of 'em had their patriotic duties splattered across some rice field by the Viet Cong. While they was off getting themselves killed, the factory took on women and other second rate people to fill the gaps. Them years saw some odd characters on the shop floor. A lot of 'em couldn't of got work minding street poles nowhere else.
But I'm gonna tell you about two people that was about as different from each other as a lobster and a bank. The only thing they had in common was they was both outsiders, and they got kind of squeezed together by fate.
I'll tell you about what happened to these two. I'll try make it sound like a real story, you know, throw in a few jokes and make you feel like you was there too. I'm new at all this. Here goes.
1
A pink 63 Chevy pulled up inside a shadow in front of the factory. The driver kicked open the stuck passenger door, got out, hitched up her glittery skirt, and peed on the dust. When she was done, she stayed squatting and looked up at the black walls and the meshed-over windows.
There was two lights over the factory sign. One of 'em was throbbing like a hangover. Their job was to announce to the world that this was, 'ROUNDLY'S POOL AND BILLIARD BALL COMPANY CORP. Established 1928'. She should care less. The paint on the sign was peeling and it was kind of embarrassed by all the attention.
Squatting there with her bare ass sticking out she looked one hell of a queer sight. If she'd been that five year old kid beside a rice field in the middle of Laos, no one would of minded. It was all pretty darn normal when she was a kid. You took your bath in the rain hole with the buffalo. You et the scraps that was left for you. And you stuck out your fanny and peed wherever the mood took you.
But there was different rules in Indiana and Ohio and Pennsylvania, and all them other shit holes she'd drifted through over the past sixteen years. All that drifting was slowly rubbing away the memories of what her home had been like. She didn't have that many to start with: her one and only cloth skirt that she'd scrubbed so many times there was only hope holding it together, the sun roasting her bony back when she gathered the squeaky rice, the mosquitoes chewing away at her when she slept on the bare bamboo slats, and the old witch snoring beside her. There was only about that much left.
And time, the same time that was rubbing away the memories, was making them memories feel a lot better than they deserved to be. Cause if she compared them with what she was now, they wasn't so damn bad.
She sighed, climbed into the back seat, and tried to get some kind of sleep over the next three hours. There weren't nothing to dream about.
"Another frigging factory".
2
Six blocks south there was a room. It smelled of cremated hamburger cause that's what burned there earlier and smells didn't have nowhere to go. Sounds? Well, there was the ticking of a clock, the wheezing of a busted cistern, the pings of dumb insects butting the light bulb outside, and fat Waldo's watery snoring.
It was some time after three and the quietest time the room ever had. The late drunks and ragers and sex maniacs in the rooms around was all unconscious at last. The wife slappers was slapping other men's wives in their dreams. The bratty kids was smiling sweet like they'd never made no one miserable.
It'd be another 200 minutes before the morning sounds woke up; the throat clearing and screaming, the slamming, crashing, rocking and rolling, motors roaring, glasses smashing, Crispies snap, crackle and popping, coffee bubbling, and miserable babies warbling. Course, that was all other folks' business, but in a stack of apartments thin as cardboard you minded other peoples' business like it or not.
Waldo was busy dreaming about Mexico again.
He's dancing on a sombrero. His old fat legs are going at it like bee wings. You can't hardly see 'em. There ain't no music far as he can hear but he sure is making a mess of that old sombrero. It don't seem odd to him he'd be dancing on it. Hell, it's Mexico. They all dance on their hats in Mexico, right? Least that’s what he thought.
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br /> But then the dream camera pulls back and all around him is this circle of mean looking Mexican hombres with black moustaches under their noses The more he dances, the more he mashes up that sorry sombrero, and fluffs of material start settling on them black mo's. The Mexicans sure don't like that, and one by one they draw these razor knives and …and that was when Waldo pulled the dream emergency cord and bailed out before it was too late.
He was back in his room swimming in sweat. Why did all his Mexico dreams end up like that? He wiped his shiny black face with the pillow. It was still early but there wasn't no way he was going back into that there dream alone. No way. He couldn't work it out. All his awake Mexico dreams was so happy, but his sleeping ones was blacker'n midnight. It didn't figure.
He walked slowly across to the bathroom. He stood himself under the water rose and turned the tap on. Water come out. It's true. That wasn't such a normal thing in Waldo's place. It only happened if you got in there early enough. The brownish water washed away the sweat and the nightmare, and left him feeling as good as he was likely to feel all day.
But he didn't care about nothing. He wouldn't have to put up with all the crap much longer. Two more months and Mexico wouldn't be a dream no more. Two more months.
3
Feet shuffled past the pink 63 Chevy, through the gate and into Roundly's. Waldo's feet was among 'em. All the boots made sounds, but the people in them didn't. There was some unwrit rule you had to be as miserable as sin before the siren sounded. These was folks that resented their lives being interrupted by work. They ignored each other till they was forced to be workmates.
Waldo looked at faces he'd been seeing all his life. They'd started off as little round red faces, then went through being pimply, then smooth, then hairy, till they ended up miserable, no-hope faces walking to Roundly's like they was walking to reckoning day. He remembered his grandma telling him how every time you smile at someone and they don't smile back, a bird drops out the sky.
Thirty-eight years ago he tried to smile at everyone in the morning but them faces stayed sour as unwashed milk cartons. So thirty-eight years ago he stopped smiling too. There was too few birds in the sky as it was.
After 7 you might get the odd grin. That's when folk's engines kicked in like old VW vans on cold mornings. Once they started being sociable there was the chance of a conversation or two. But don't you go confusing 'sociable' with 'friendly'. Weren't really no-one on friendly terms at Roundly's. Best buddies arriving at the plant together was likely to be knifing each other by the third week. It was just that kind of place. Some said it was the ball fumes.
Waldo got more bad feeling than most. It wasn't cause he was a nasty person. He was probably the nicest guy at Roundly's. It wasn't cause he was black. He'd been around so long, most people had forgot what color he was (and we'll get on to colour later). Only young punks passing through town tried the 'nigger' thing on him. But they didn't last long at Roundly's. No-one with the initiative to be racist could survive the mind-numbing work at that damn factory.
Waldo had been there since his 27th birthday. He'd done every job in the plant. He knew the habits of every bit of machinery and, you can't take it away from the guy, he could tell you the weight of a pool ball just by looking at it. With all his experience and patience, old Mr. Roundly's alcoholic daughter had no hesitation, or choice, but to name him Quality Control Officer (that's QCO). A position he'd held for seventeen years.
Well, I guess from what you've heard so far, you'd of worked out that the word 'quality' and the word 'Roundly's' ain't exactly kissing cousins. Wasn't nobody in Mattfield could have took the responsibility of being QCO as serious as Waldo did. He didn't let you get away with nothing shoddy. Roundly's probably lasted as long as it did thanks to Waldo. But it didn't make him the most popular guy there. Why would you want to make a billiard ball round when you get paid the same for making it egg-shaped?
Waldo wasn't nothing if he wasn't dedicated. Roundly's owed him a lot. But there comes a time for all men great and small to reach the end of their careers, and Waldo was two months away from making the workers at Roundly's real happy.
-o-
Waldo carried his belly over to his locker like he was a few days away from giving birth to a medicine ball. He'd had the gut for so long he couldn't imagine being without it. But recently he'd started to notice something about his health. He didn't have none. He'd eaten junk all his life and turned into a big piece of junk himself. He couldn't breath good cause of the lard around his lungs. He was tuckered out just walking the six blocks to work. But he was gonna get in shape for his retirement, starting real soon.
Stage one was diet. Into his locker he put two very long peanut butter and honey sandwiches - baguettes they call 'em - six bananas, four Snickers bars and two cans of Coke. The bananas was his idea. He figured once he got used to them, he could cut down, maybe even leave out the Snickers. The honey was Jessie Jackson's idea. In his wilder, less knowledgeable days, Waldo would of plastered jelly on his sandwich. But he heard the reverend on the wireless once saying that jelly was just fruit coloring soaked in sugar for a month. He convinced half the black mid-west that this was another white plot to incapacitate the colored masses.
So, Waldo, not wanting to be incapacitated for Judgement Day, switched to honey.Honey was after all 100% pure natural sugar with no artificial flavoring or additives. It did concern him for some time that it was pretty much just bee sick, but that was an obstacle he managed to climb over.
He took the industrial goggles and gloves out of the locker and locked it.
"Two more months," he said under his breath. "61 days, 9 1/2 hours, 33 minutes and it'll all be over." He wondered what the people at the resort in Lerdo de Tejada was doing right that minute. Probably not even up yet. Probably sleep to 7:30 or something crazy like that. Go burro-back riding before breakfast. What a life. Them burros was so close he could almost smell them.
But it turned out to be B.O. Bulokavic standing behind him.
"Move your fat arse Waldo."
"Sure, B.O."
On Mondays Bulokavic didn't stink so bad as other days. Rumour had it he even took a shower at weekends, least got close enough to soap to make a difference. Sure if you couldn't get closer 'n handshaking distance on a Monday, you never would all week. He had himself a wife at home. You're probably asking yourself how she could of stood all that stinking. Tell the truth she didn'tknow he smelt bad on account of her not having a nose. Serious.
Seems she got caught in her papa's lawn mower when she was a littl'un. It mashed her head up something horrible. They hurried her off to the hospital in South Bend and the doctors there did a pretty worthy job of stitching her back together. But there weren't nothing they could do about her nose. They reckon the chickens must of got it. So they just plugged the hole and sent her home.
She come out of it looking okay, if you don't think noses are important for looks. At high school she noticed B.O. He was a good-looking boy and she couldn't understand why the girls stayed away from him. She figured B.O was his initials. Getting wed suited the both of them. At the ceremony, B.O. read a poem he'd writ. The line everyone recalls went;
'Between her eyes and headin south, ain't nothin till you reach her mouth."
It was real pretty that. But I'm letting myself get side slapped here. This book ain't about B.O. It's about Waldo. Good story though, eh?
4
When he got in from work that evening, there was a cranky mood in there waiting for him. It was like someone had been pumping bad feeling in through the air vents. That's what he thought at first till he realized he probably fetched it in with him. He wasn't of a mind to do nothing but sit and grumble.
"Aretha, honey. You wouldn't believe what the management's brought me to train up. This little China girl with no more fire in her than an icy pole. She don't give a shoot about quality control. I don't get the feeling she'll be around long enough to finish the training. You know what she said to m
e today?"
Aretha didn't answer on account of Aretha being dead. I don't mean she was dead and he was there talking to the body or nothing weird like that. She'd been dead and buried some fifteen years. But that didn't stop him talking to her. Just cause she was dead didn't mean he couldn't talk to her, right? Just cut down on the answering time was all.
"She said, 'Them's balls. Why don't you just roll 'em? If they roll straight, that's quality ain't it? If they don't roll straight you just quality control the little suckers out of there.' Jees, Reet. You see what I mean? She'd have balls rolling around all over the plant if I didn't stop her. I tried to explain to her about weight, and balance, and torque, and sheen and all that stuff, and you know what she said? You won't believe this, Reet honey. You'll laugh when I tell you. I was too bellypunched to laugh myself. She said, 'Hell, they's only balls.'
'Only balls.' Them's the very words come out of her mouth. Jees."
He was feeling better now. Talking things over with Aretha always made him feel better. She was the only one that really understood how he felt about stuff. All that moaning had made him hungry as a dump dog.
First he went off and took a shower. Well, tell the truth he just boogied around under a drip barely wet enough to rinse the soap off. But if it weren't for his shimmy in the shower, he wouldn't of got no exercise at all.
He put on his red flannel pajamas even though it wasn't barely dark outside, and went to his favourite place in the apartment, the kitchen. He transferred the top two aluminum trays from the freezer to the snack oven and set the dial to 'rapid defrost and bake'. He emptied a liter of Coke into a pitcher and carried it to the living room. "White for fish. Red for meat. Dark brown for TV dinners."
Pool and its Role in Asian Communism Page 1
