by Julie Morgan
Andria leaned in and kissed Jax. A moment passed before Jax kissed her back. She felt his hands pull her body closer to his own. She opened her mouth and accepted his tongue as his hand moved to the base of her head, cupping it.
She gasped against his lips and Jax pulled away as quickly as the kiss started. She panted and his breaths managed to meet hers. “Why did you stop?” she heard herself ask. Her lips stung in the best possible way. A pleasant throb between her legs reminded her she enjoyed sex and this kiss woke something inside her long since buried away. She needed more. She reached up and touched his cheek.
Jax took her hand and held it, then met her gaze. “Andria, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t.”
She shook her head and smiled. “But I kissed you, and correct me if I’m wrong, but you kissed me back.”
He nodded and Andria lifted a brow. “I want you to kiss me again.”
He closed his eyes and his head rested on the wall behind him. “I would love to do just that, but,” he lifted his head and opened his eyes. “Let me walk you to your room. It’s been a long day and an even longer night.”
How did they end up here? She woke from a dream and it stayed with her, enough to scare her half to death at the smallest of noises. Then Jax held onto her as if she were his.
She wanted to be his, but was this a reaction to his being her protector? Was this moment driven by passion? Probably yes, most likely.
She removed her other arm from his shoulder and moved from his lap. Jax stood and offered his hand to her. She looked at it for a moment then slipped her hand into his. After he pulled her to her feet, he motioned for her to lead the way.
“I came out for a drink of water,” she whispered. Once she reached the door, she turned back to Jax. He stared at the floor and took a step back.
“Are you good?” He looked up at her with concern on his features.
She nodded. “Yes, and no. Yes, I’m fine, but no, well, because I feel a bit rejected.”
“Andria, it’s not…”
“Stop,” she interrupted him. “Please, before I make an even bigger ass of myself. “Goodnight, Jax. I’ll see you in the morning.” She closed the door and leaned against it. Her chest stung from his rejection of her. But was it a rejection of her, or of the situation? She guessed it didn’t matter. He’d turned her away.
“Well, I guess it’s me and you tonight, BOB.” She walked to her bed and opened the nightstand. She remembered the conversation about the equipment being installed in her room and she shook her head. It would serve him right to be forced to watch it. She smirked and pulled the vibrator from her drawer and laid down. She spread her legs and when she turned on the wand, she pictured Jax in her mind touching her, licking her, thrusting inside her.
Her back arched at the sensation and she gasped. She needed Jax and in time, she knew she would have him. It wasn’t a matter of if, but when.
7
A few days had passed since the kiss in the hallway. Casual conversation happened between Andria and Jax, but it was nothing more than question/answer sessions and weather chats.
She sighed as she picked at her breakfast at the breakfast nook table. Jax sat across from her reading the news and sipping his coffee. She sat the fork down and cleared her throat.
He looked up at her and sat the paper down.
“Can we talk?” She folded her hands in her lap and sat straight. “I feel like we need to clear the air between us.”
“Sure,” he started and moved his cup away. “Let me start?”
She hadn’t expected that, so she nodded.
“Right,” he said and cleared his throat. “Look, this is how it is. I’m here to do a job. The job is to keep you safe at all times. It’s what you’re paying us for.”
She did not like his matter-of-fact statement, but nodded for him to continue.
“But Andria, I won’t lie. You are a very beautiful, very sexy woman. If this were any other situation or circumstance, we would not have stopped the kiss in the hallway.”
She blushed and her mouth opened. She had this speech planned about how it was a mistake to have kissed him, and apologize. But this? This was not expected. She could only stare at him.
He lifted his brow and chuckled. “Andria?”
“Umm,” she said and pulled her hair behind her ears. She turned to the side on her stool and was still at a loss for words. She nodded and stood from her seat. “I need to, umm, get dressed.” She walked by him and she gasped when he grabbed her arm.
“Look, I’m sorry if what I said made you uncomfortable, but I promise, I will not slip up again.”
She held her breath for a moment, then pulled on the bravery deep inside herself. She exhaled and turned to face him. “What if I want you to?” Shit, did she just say that? His eyes widened and he let her go.
She walked out of the room as fast as her feet could carry her. Shit, she really did say that.
Crap!
She closed her bedroom door and leaned against it with her palms.
What the fuck do I do now? Go out there and say just kidding? Crap!
She pushed off the door with a sigh and decided to get dressed. Pulling on a white button-down blouse, denim jeans, and white wedge sandals, she went to her bathroom to brush her hair and braided it. She smeared on lip gloss and applied mascara to her lashes.
Pushing on her sunglasses, she could at least avoid eye contact with Jax. She jumped at a knock on her door.
Crap!
Walking to her door felt like walking the Green Mile. She grasped the handle and held it, then with a deep breath, turned it and opened the door.
Jax leaned on the frame and raised a brow to her. “You meant that?”
“What?” she asked and tried to act as casually as she could. She leaned against the wall and crossed her arms. She looked to him, then to the floor.
“You know what,” he said in the sexiest tone.
He melted her and her panties. She wanted to kiss him again. She wanted to feel his body against hers, naked, in her bed, in the shower, anywhere.
She looked up and nodded. “Yes, I did.”
He grinned a sexy as hell, lopsided grin. “Good. That’s what I thought.” He turned away from her and left her space.
Her mouth dropped open from the abruptness. “Excuse me?”
“What?” he answered and stepped back. “Changing your mind?”
“No, but…”
“No buts. I just wanted to know. Now get yourself ready to roll. I’m taking you to learn how to fire a weapon.”
The blood drained from her face at the news. They would be back on base at Quantico. She would hold a firearm. She would fire it. She had never fired a weapon before beyond Nerf toys. Maybe they would do more self-defense training.
The idea of self-defense didn’t sound so bad. Maybe the weapons training wouldn’t be either. He would probably stand behind her, put his arms around her to show her how to hold the gun. Maybe all of that didn’t sound so awful.
She smiled and left her room. “Let me grab my purse.”
Arriving on the training base, Jax escorted Andria inside. She looked at her surroundings, taken aback having never been to a gun range. The place was quite organized, clean, and air conditioned. To their left was a desk with someone checking people in and out. Jax stepped over and signed them in. To her right was an open area with weapons taken apart and a few people learning how to put them back together. In front of her, in the distance, was a guarded room.
She leaned in to Jax. “What’s down there?”
He grinned. “That’s the weapons room. In there, we’ll get you fitted for what would work best for you. My guess is a revolver.”
“Revolver. Isn’t that the gun with the trigger you pull back and squeeze to fire?”
He nodded. “Something like that. Right concept, wrong wording, but no worries. You’ll learn a lot today on gun safety, handling, and firing.”
“I’ll learn even about firing? Isn’t
it as easy as pulling the thing back?”
“The trigger?” he asked. She nodded. “Yes and no. You only ever point a gun at someone with the intent to shoot them.”
She raised her brows. “Wow, okay. I hope it never comes to that.”
“Always better to pack and not need than to need it and be empty.
He took her hand and led her through the room. She smiled at this.
It’s nothing, Andria. Just a simple gesture to lead you through the room, nothing more. Just breathe and smile. Be into this and learn what you can.
“What can we do for you today?” asked one of the guards by the weapons room.
Andria peeked around the man and took in the weapons in the room. From what she could see at this distance, the wall in view was nothing but guns.
“…and we’re here to learn how to fire and fit her for what works for her handling,” Jax said.
She missed the first part of the conversation, but nodded with a smile at the intent of gun learning.
“Have you handled anything before?” the man asked.
She shook her head. “No, this is all new to me.”
“I think we should go right to the revolver then. We have ones with hammers and ones without.”
“Let’s try both,” Jax told him and looked to Andria. “Sound good?”
She shrugged. “I…yeah, sure.”
He chuckled. “It’s okay. I’ll have your back through all of this. Right on the other side of the door is the firing range.”
“Okay,” she said in a small voice. Jax led her into the weapons room and she gasped. This room was no room, it was a fortress. Guns from small sizes to extremely large were lined up along the walls. There were no gaps, no windows, nothing but guns.
She swallowed hard and felt frightened. She stepped closer to Jax and slipped her hand around his inner elbow. She squeezed and felt the panic that rose subside.
“Are you all right?” he whispered to her.
She looked up into his eyes, his beautiful blue eyes. She held his gaze for a moment before answering. With a nod, she released the pressure on his arm. “Yes,” she whispered. “Just a lot to take in.”
He grinned. “Nothing in here is loaded, not until we venture outside.”
She nodded once more. “Let’s do this.”
Andria palmed the hammerless revolver. It was brushed silver, black rubber-like grip, and lightweight. She could use this gun.
After the instructions she received on the weapon, she pushed the release button and the barrel opened. She approached the table and picked up the ammo. One by one, she loaded the barrel, then closed it with a click.
She looked up to Jax. “Will you help me line up the first shot?”
He grinned. “Absolutely.”
Andria smiled and lowered her gaze, then turned to face the target down the firing range. A white sheet hung with a red outline on it.
He stood beside her and took her weapon. She watched him check the safety. “You can hold your gun one of two ways. First is the Weaver stance.” His right hand covered his left with the finger over the trigger. His thumbs sat one over the other. “The second is the cross stance.” He interlaced his fingers with his finger over the trigger. “Both are held in a similar way and will work. Use what is most comfortable for you.”
He handed the gun back to her. She palmed it in her right hand, her finger next to the trigger. She supported the gun with her left and looked to Jax. “Like this?”
“Yeah, that’s good. Now turn and face the target. Safety still on?”
She nodded. “Yes, it is.”
“Good. Raise your arms shoulder level. Your left arm will be slightly bent more than the right.”
She nodded and held the weapon out. She smiled, she couldn’t help herself. She held power in her hands and she felt liberated. She felt empowered.
“You need to get your stance right.”
She felt his hands on her shoulders. She smiled when fear did not escalate, nor panic. She grinned and looked back at him.
“No, keep looking straight ahead.”
She turned back, a smile still on her lips. He pressed his body close to hers and felt his foot kick between her legs.
“I, umm, need you to spread your legs a little to support yourself.”
She pressed her lips together to keep from laughing, then nodded. She felt his hands on her shoulders slide down to her biceps, then to her elbows, down her forearms. Heat rose in her body and she exhaled a breath.
“When you’re ready,” he whispered by her ear, “turn off the safety. Line up the sight and fire. I’ll be right here. I’m not moving or letting go.”
She inhaled a deep breath, then slowly exhaled. She felt for the safety and flipped it off.
“There may be a kick back when firing,” he whispered.
She nodded, but had no idea what he meant by kick back. At the end of her breath, she closed one eye and lined up the shot. The sounds around her became quiet. She felt the breeze outside, felt Jax against her, but nothing else.
She slid her finger over the trigger, then gave it a pull.
Her arms jerked up and her body pushed back into Jax. Her eyes wide, she laughed. “Oh my God, that was incredible! Wow, and loud!”
He chuckled and moved his hands to her shoulders. “Well done. I think you hit the target as well.”
“Really?” she squealed.
He smiled. “Come on, do a few more rounds. Then we’ll see how you did.”
She grinned and turned back toward the target. She felt his presence again behind her, his arms around her, and she smiled. She raised the run and lined up her target, and fired.
8
Excitement, the novelty of being a gun owner, and firing her weapon at the base today provided a new level of encouragement to Andria. She felt incredible.
“I want to celebrate with a bottle of wine and some dinner,” she told Jax.
“Celebrate what? Buying your first gun?”
She nodded with a smile. “Yes! I’m excited about this.”
“Understand owning a gun is not like buying a new car. It’s a weapon that you should never plan on using.”
Her smile faded slightly. “Wow, you’re a party pooper.”
He chuckled. “Sorry, I just mean don’t celebrate the fact you are now a gun owner. Celebrate your freedom and know you’ll be safe, no matter what.”
Freedom. Did she have her freedom? In a way, yes. She had freedom so long as she kept close to Jax. Did that mean she traded in one insecurity for another, though? She felt insecure about Draven, even after he went to prison. She constantly looked over her shoulder for him. She just knew he would be there. He never was but that wasn’t the point. He held that power over her. To get the power back, Draven went to prison, and she moved far away.
Now that he was back out in the world, she felt insecure again and to protect herself, she hired a bodyguard.
Was she really free?
Her smile faltered a little more. She turned toward her kitchen and opened the fridge door. She pulled out a bottle of Moscato and handed it over to Jax. “Open this, please?”
“Sure, but only if you tell me what just happened. I didn’t mean to, as you say, poop on your party.”
She laughed, she couldn’t help it. She shook her head. “No, it’s all right. I sometimes get caught up in my own head. I become my own worst enemy.” She handed him a corkscrew.
He screwed in the driver and pulled out the cork, handing it back to her. “Want to talk about it?”
She shook her head and poured wine into her glass. “No thanks. But what I do want to talk about is dinner. I’m starving.” She sat the bottle on the counter then took a seat.
He grinned. “Great. I want to cook something. Chicken or steak?”
She smirked. “Steak. Always.”
“My kinda girl. All right then.” He opened the fridge and began to pull contents out while she sipped on her wine.
My kinda g
irl.
My kinda girl.
I would love to be your girl.
She smiled and swirled the wine in her glass. She watched him as he moved about the kitchen. From preparing the steak to wrapping up potatoes in foil, the man knew his way around. He motioned for the back door. She stood and opened it for him as he stepped past. She made note of his backside again and smiled. His pants hugged around his ass in a way that screamed GRAB ME!
She giggled to herself. He looked up to her with a smirk.
“Something funny?”
Oh crap, he heard me laugh? She shook her head. “No, just clearing my throat.” She stepped outside and stood next to him. “So, no girlfriend?”
“Nope.”
“No wife or kids?”
“That’s a no and not that I’m aware of.” He winked at her.
She smiled. “What else can you tell me about yourself?”
He shrugged and poked at the steak. “There’s not much to tell, really. My mom and dad are still married. I have a brother, but no sisters. He’s younger and in the Marines. He expressed interest joining the SEALs.”
“I heard it’s very hard to pass the qualifications.”
He nodded. “Extremely. Many quit before the end. Many. I made it through and served five years as a SEAL. The other fifteen I was in the Marines as well. My father was also a Marine.”
She sipped her wine and thought about that. She had never dated anyone in the military; not that she wouldn’t, she just never had the opportunity to. “How often were you deployed?”
He shrugged. “It honestly depended on the mission. Sometimes once a year for a yearlong deployment. Other times I may go three or four times for a small stint. All in what was required.”
“Wow,” she whispered. “How did you end up with GAPS?”
He smiled. “I met a few guys who turned me onto the idea and what they did. It’s a good gig and keeps me busy.” He looked to her with a wicked grin. “Great way to meet hot chicks.”
