by Ann Jacobs
There was that dreaded T-word again, Anne thought, her mood shifting away from passion. She thought for a moment how to answer him. “A woman is always at risk with a man. I’ve provided treatment to more than one woman who suffered injury at the hands of a man. For me to even be here, now, speaks of my trust in you. Love me, Rob.”
“I do. And I will. I will be gentle with you, even if it kills me,” he promised her. “You will never suffer harm at my hands.”
“Not too gentle, I trust, Robbie. Not too gentle,” she urged him.
His fingers continued to play with her clitoris and to arouse her further.
He slid one finger into her, then another, while using his thumb on her clit.
“You are so responsive, so giving,” he told her in wonder.
“You’re driving me mad,” she answered.
“You are so wet and warm, it is all I can do not to fuck you now.”
“Do not restrain yourself, Robbie. Come to me, fill me, love me. I want you desperately.”
He positioned himself above her, and settled in between her thighs. Slowly, with care, he slid his quimstake into her hot quiff.
Anne wrapped her legs around his hips. “Hard, Rob.”
“Sweeting, are you sure?”
“Hard!”
He obliged her.
Anne wrapped her arms around him and held on as he gave and took himself to and from her. She lost herself in the need, the sensation, he was creating within her. He was taking her headlong into ecstasy. She recognized that she was not far from orgasm. It had never been hard for her to achieve her own pleasure solo. But with Rob, it was even easier than ever to reach that plateau, and so much more satisfying.
Rob looked at her face. Her eyes were closed. Who was she making love to? Him or her dead husband? Suddenly, he had to know. “Look at me, Nan!” he ordered in a fierce and low voice. “Look at me!”
She looked into his eyes.
He was stunned by the desire and even the love he saw reflected there.
“Rob!” she cried out in a hushed and awed voice as he felt the spasms of her release begin.
That was all he needed to know. He couldn’t make himself wait any longer. The contractions of her muscles around him were driving him over the brink.
Rob gave a low moan then Anne felt the warm spurt of his semen fill her.
Rob collapsed onto her. He lay there, dropping light kisses on her face.
When he could speak again, he said lowly, “Nan, I’m sorry for the rush. You make me feel eager as a callow lad. I fear I just showed you that level of skill and pleasure as well as that level of eagerness.”
Anne laughed softly. “Do you hear me complaining?”
If only things were different, she thought in regret, there might be a child of this union. But as long as they were on opposite sides of the political spectrum, as long as she would be considered “traitor” if discovered, she couldn’t risk conceiving his son. There was enough risk here, she didn’t need to place an innocent life in jeopardy as well. This was the way this was. There simply was no help for it. She only wished it didn’t hurt so much. She only wished she didn’t love him so much.
“No,” Rob said after he rolled off her.
Anne looked at him and blinked twice. Did I think aloud? she wondered in panic.
He leaned up on an elbow and looked down at her, his face clearly concerned. “Although you have every reason to complain,” he said as he stroked her face. “My sweet lady, you have every possible cause to complain. Today, I have shown you less consideration than any gentleman should ever show a lady.”
Her relief was tangible.
She spoke to him in a hushed tone, “We have time, Rob. We have time. I shouldn’t have come to you tonight. This was wrong. Forgive me.”
“Nothing between us could ever be wrong, Nan, my lovely. There is nothing to forgive.”
“Others would not be so kind.”
“Others can kiss my arse.”
Anne laughed. “Oh no, my dear. I believe that is my right.”
He looked at her for a long moment, then smiled. “Do you want to kiss my arse?”
“Do you know how cute your backside is?” she replied, with a smile. “Why should I find kissing it any less appealing than kissing your handsome face?”
Rob laughed softly. “Oh, Nan! Our life together is going to be anything except boring.” Then he yawned.
“Be at ease, Rob. Be at ease, my love. Allow me to hold you until you fall asleep.”
He yawned again. Then he placed his head on his pillow.
Anne stroked his face. “Sleep now. You have had a long few weeks of little rest on the trip.”
“The roads were not good. The beds in the Inns left much to be desired. And I longed to be here with you.”
“Sleep now. Shall I go downstairs and brew you a sleeping draught?” she offered.
Rob yawned. “No. I believe I have no need for that.”
“Did you see the way that Solway was looking at Katherine Norris?” Anne asked.
“Yes. They are quite taken with one another. It’s likely calf-love.”
“I fear it may be more than that.”
Rob yawned. “He’s your son. I will take whatever acts you believe I should. Would you have me have speech with him?”
“No. I believe that would be counterproductive. Already, he is less than enamored of the prospect of my remarrying.”
“So I’ve determined,” Rob said with a yawn as his eyes drooped.
“Sleep now. We’ll have speech on the morrow.”
Anne could not sleep. She lay beside him looking at him sleep until the candles burnt themselves out. Anne wasn’t a woman to run from the truth. And she wasn’t going to run from this one. She was in love with Robert Garrick, body and soul. Somehow, that made what she had been ordered to do all that more difficult.
* * * * *
Anne awoke to the sensation of being looked at. She forced open her eyes. Rob leaned up on one elbow looking down at her.
“Good morrow, Rob.”
“My lady.”
“What is the hour, do you know?”
“The sun has not yet completely risen.”
“Ah,” she said as she touched his chest and ran her hand lightly down to his groin. She encircled his erect quimstake with her hand. “The sun may not yet be risen, yet you are.”
Rob chuckled. “Aye, my lady. Now, what do you intend to do about it?”
“What would you have me to do about it?”
“Anything you desired.”
“Ah, shall I tell you of my desires?” she told him.
“I await your pleasure.”
“Rightfully, you should wait, at least until after the marriage ceremony.”
“We’ve already gone over that fence, my dearest.”
She nodded. “My maid will be coming up soon. I must at least make my bed appear to have been slept in.”
“Do you think your maid will care where you slept?”
“No.”
Rob kissed her forehead. “I do love you.”
Anne nodded. “I know this.”
“Tell me of your desires.”
Anne shook her head denying the request to share.
Rob looked at her. “Why not?”
“We don’t know each other that well, yet.”
He chuckled. “Are your desires shocking?”
“You might well think so.”
“Tell all, woman!”
“Nay. A woman should have some mystery about her.”
Rob smiled at her, then he teased her. “Do you know what I do with women who will not share their desires with me?”
“Nay, I do not,” Anne answered, entering into the spirit of the game.
“There is a penalty for sharing my bed without sharing your thoughts,” Rob told her.
“Is there?” she teased him.
“Aye,” he answered seriously. “I will have your thoughts and desires from you,
woman.”
“I do not wish to share them.”
“Are you willing to pay the penalty for not sharing?”
“I am unwilling to share my thoughts.”
“Then you are willing to pay the penalty?”
“I suppose I must be.”
Rob smiled at her, then he dropped a kiss on her cheek. “Very well,” he told her as he sat up in bed and pulled her face down across his lap. The sheets and eiderdown barely covered her, although they left his chest exposed to the cold of the room. “Anytime you wish me to stop, you can simply tell me what it is that you are unwilling to share.”
“Rob!” she cried softly as he applied his open hand to her bare buttocks.
The place where his hand had fallen stung, and was oddly stimulating. The sting of his hand translated into desire. This was one thing she had never imagined, that pain could lead to pleasure. She didn’t know what to make of that. Yet, there was no denying the heat and heaviness that had settled in her womb as a result of his striking her. She rather liked it.
He struck her again, lightly, across the ass. “Nan?”
“Thank you sir. May I have another?” she begged.
He chuckled quietly, then smacked her arse again.
Anne felt his quimstake hard and hot beneath her belly as the warmth of the stroke spread once more to her quiff.
His right hand went from her arse to the soft folds of her quiff and he began to tease her into a larger state of arousal as he found and lightly rubbed her clit. Then he struck her once more with his left hand this time, keeping his right hand occupied with arousing her.
Anne moaned. But Rob knew that it was a sound of pleasure.
It was only a matter of moments of this play that Anne felt herself perched at the brink of release.
Rob, feeling her tense, probed her quiff and was rewarded by her muscles spasming around his fingers. He couldn’t believe, really couldn’t believe, how responsive she was to him. Yet, the evidence was overwhelming. Rob counted himself among the luckiest of men.
“Nan?” Rob asked as her breathing settled down. “Have you had enough of this?”
“For now.”
“I still wish to know what your desires are.”
Anne rose to her hands and knees. Then she positioned herself so that she was on her knees facing him with her legs astride his hips. His quimstake was less than an inch away from entering her.
She shifted her hips and took his hard, hot, quimstake inside her. “Kiss my breasts.”
Yet, Rob had different ideas. He wrapped his strong arms around her waist, held her tightly against him. His mouth covered hers. Although he started the kiss, within a moment, the passion was mutual. Then he broke the caress and moved his mouth slowly down her chin and throat until he was doing as she had asked.
Combining the sensation of his hard quimstake inside of her quiff and the warm wetness of his mouth on her breasts was nearly overwhelming. Yet she didn’t want it to end. She moved her hips and discovered that sitting face to face was good for a feeling of intimacy with him, but not so good for moving her hips or for allowing him to thrust.
Rob lifted his head from her breasts. “I need more,” he told her.
She nodded, knowing precisely what he meant. Anne lifted herself away from him, and moved sideways on the bed, still on her knees.
He slid down in the bed. “Take the upper hand, Nan.”
She smiled. “Are you certain?”
“I can’t think of much I would like more than to watch you love me.”
“And I can’t think of much I would desire more than to make love with you.”
“Why do you delay?”
She shook her head as to dismiss his comment then moved so that she held him between her thighs. Slowly, to allow herself to enjoy this, she lowered her wet quiff onto his quimstake.
Anne doubted that she would ever take for granted the pleasure she felt in their lovemaking. It seemed a miracle to her each time that he touched her and made her feel such soul deep pleasure, each time that he was able to give her the release she had experienced only rarely during her marriage to Anthony.
Rob’s hands went to her hips. He wordlessly urged her to set a quick pace in her hip movements.
Neither of them was in a mood for leisure. Both of them wanted a headlong rush into release.
Impatiently, wanting more after a few minutes of enjoying watching her, touching her breasts, playing with their fullness, rolling her nipples between his thumbs and fingers, as he let her do the work, Rob began to thrust, increasing the tempo of this mating dance. Both of their breaths were coming fast and hard, almost as fast and hard as their hips were moving.
Anne closed her eyes and threw back her head as her pleasure built to the crescendo.
The spasms of her release drove him over the edge. He shuddered with his orgasm as she gently collapsed to lie on him. Lying there, moments later, he realized dimly that she had to be feeling the cold in the room. Until now, he hadn’t really noticed it.
He reached down and pulled the sheets and eiderdown over them.
“I love you, Nan.”
Her breathing had almost slowed down to normal. But, what was normal around him? “Rob,” she told him on a whisper, “just hold me.”
“As long as you wish it, my dearest,” Rob told her.
“If you held me as long as I would wish it, we would never leave this bed,” she told him.
“Sounds to be an excellent idea to me, Nan.”
“The world will not let us hide here, although we may wish to.”
“’STAY, O sweet, and do not rise; The light that shines comes from thine eyes; The day breaks not, it is my heart, Because that you and I must part. Stay, or else my joys will die, And perish in their infancy,’” Rob recited the poem with the feeling the poet intended.
“The late Doctor Donne would roll over in his grave if he thought his poetry was still this well known,” Anne replied as she kissed Rob’s cheek.
“Aye. He did his best to burn it all when he began to publish his sermons.”
Anne smiled. Another poem of Donne’s that suited the moment came to her mind, and she adapted it for a woman’s voice, “’Sweetest love, I do not go, For weariness of thee, Nor in hope the world can show A fitter love for me; But since that I At the last must part, ‘tis best, Thus to use myself in jest By feigned deaths to die. Yesternight the sun went hence, And yet is here to-day; She hath no desire nor sense, Nor half so short a way; Then fear not me, But believe that I shall make Speedier journeys, since I take More wings and spurs than she. O how feeble is woman’s power, That if good fortune fall, Cannot add another hour, Nor a lost hour recall; But come bad chance, And we join to it our strength, And we teach it art and length, Itself o’er us to advance.
When thou sigh’st, thou sigh’st not wind, But sigh’st my soul away; When thou weep’st, unkindly kind, My life’s blood doth decay. It cannot be That thou lovest me as thou say’st, If in thine my life thou waste, That art the best of me. Let not thy divining heart Forethink me any ill; Destiny may take thy part, And may thy fears fulfil. But think that we Are but turn’d aside to sleep. They who one another keep Alive, ne’er parted be.’”
Rob kissed her forehead. “You are as witty and wise as you are beautiful.”
“Nay. I am only a woman who has a day’s work ahead of her,” she said. “There is always work to be done.”
“Your most important work is right here, loving me.”
“Once we are wed. Until then, I am still mistress of this house and there are guests present. They would not think kindly of me, if I did not see to their breaking their fasts.”
“You have a cook for that. Mistress Giddings, was that not her name?”
Anne yawned. “If I lay with you much longer, I shall sleep again.”
Rob yawned in return. “And what, lady, would be wrong with that?”
“I should sleep away the day, if I slept now.”
“None
could fault a woman for getting sleep while she could. I’m certain few expect you to have much sleep in the coming night,” Rob said quietly.
“If I do not rise now, everyone will know that I had little sleep in the night just past,” Anne said with more resolve than she felt. All she wanted was to stay in bed with him and to tell the world to go away. But, life didn’t work that way.
Chapter Five
Anne and Rob stood at the front of the family chapel with the late afternoon light streaming through the colored glass windows. The small diamonds of colored glass threw a rich jewel-toned pattern onto the marble floor.
The maids had taken her green velvet and had lightly tacked bridal favors to it, tiny gold and silver braided bows that people would pull from her gown after the ceremony.
Rob’s cousin, Joshua Fielding, had already given the opening prayer and was now instructing them—and the assembled crowd of Anne’s son, the household servants, the tenants, the four Mistresses Norris, Sir Nathaniel, and Major Clay—about the institution, ends, and use of marriage as well as encouraging the bridal couple to live together faithfully, peacefully, and with respect for one another. Then Joshua solemnly charged them both that if they knew any impediment to their marriage that they now confess it.
Anne looked at Rob and smiled. He smiled at her in return.
Then Joshua asked the assembled group, “If any here know of any impediment to this couple becoming man and wife, you are bid to disclose it, or else hereafter hold your peace.”
No one spoke up.
“Hearing no objections to this marriage, Robert will you take Anne’s right hand in yours?” Joshua asked. “You know the form of the words.”
“I, Robert Edward, do take thee, Anne Elizabeth, to be my married wife, and do in the presence of God and before this congregation, promise and covenant to be a loving and faithful husband unto thee, until God shall separate us by death.”
“Anne, take Robert’s right hand in yours, and make your declaration,” Joshua instructed.
“I, Anne Elizabeth, do take thee Robert Edward to be my married husband, and do in the presence of God and before this congregation, promise and covenant to be a loving and faithful wife unto thee, until God shall separate us by death.”
