He’d been mostly a gentleman the last few days. Though I remained rigid about controlling our interactions, Toby managed to edge past my objections and mellow my guard. I liked being in this comfortable place with him.
When it was time to leave, Toby walked me to the door. He leaned against the jam, chewing on a toothpick, while I fished my keys out of my pocketbook.
“The garden was a cool idea. It made Julia pretty happy,” he said.
“I’m so glad. Maybe we can tackle the front yard next. Something needs to be done with those bushes.”
“You’re a slave driver, Chiametti. I’ll think about it.” He flicked his toothpick from one side of his mouth to the other.
I pointed at the little wooden stick. “What’s up with your sudden toothpick obsession? Seriously, I’m going to start calling you Farmer Joe.”
He laughed, his eyes bright. “I quit smoking.”
It wasn’t until he said this that I realized I hadn’t seen him with a cigarette all of the last week.
“Wow, I am extremely impressed.”
“Good,” he said. “I quit for you.”
“Really? Why for me?”
He shrugged. “You said you don’t like the smell of cigarettes.”
“That’s very considerate.”
He tipped his head to one side and smiled playfully. “Would you still think it was considerate if I told you what I really had in mind was to get my mouth on you, that I want to know what you taste like?”
I froze.
After a moment, not sure what to make of his comment, I decided to play it off as another one of his nutty lines. I even managed to smile.
“Very funny.”
“Oh, Claudia Chiametti, I am so not joking. I really, really want to kiss you. I can’t think of anything I want more right now.”
Toby moved in close and ran two fingers up my arm. The light touch flickered inside me like a gentle tickle. Gooseflesh arose on my skin.
“My satisfaction rate is very high. Aren’t you the least bit interested?” His gaze dropped from my eyes to my mouth.
Despite a growing warmness, I responded without hesitation. “No.”
He seemed to enjoy my unsettled state. “Everything inside tells me you want to kiss me. I bet you’ve even imagined it.”
“Then your radar is way off because there’s not an iota of me interested in you in any other way than as a friend.”
Undaunted, he suddenly pitched forward, positioning his arms on either side of me and trapping me in the doorway. “I know a quick way to find out for sure.”
Biting my bottom lip, I glanced around for some space to get away from what was coming at me. I felt his soft breath caress my face as he lowered his mouth towards mine.
I squeezed my eyes shut and thought, all right, all right, let’s get this over with. We’d have this one kiss—then he’d see I was not in the least interested.
I was not prepared for his gentleness. Cradling my face with his hands, he pressed his lips to the corner of my mouth. His lips were soft, tempting. Far more than I could imagine. As I stood still, he worked his way to center our mouths, his motion deliberate and slow. His efforts grew more persistent, forcing my lips to mold against his, and once the bond was complete, he emitted a soft sigh. The sound infused me with a wavering heat, and my brain felt scrambled. My resistance slackened and, as I swayed into him, my bag plunked to the floor. I didn’t resist as his arms slid down, around my waist, and he pulled me up against him.
I tried to muster up the strength to move away, but his lips continued their intimate exploration, nipping teasingly at mine. His tongue slid along the seam of my lips, feathering me with a promise of more to come. I found myself wanting to open my mouth and let him kiss me deeper, but instead, I twisted my head away.
“Stop.” Despite my demand, I held onto him, fearing my legs would give out, and I would melt at his feet.
Sighing, he rested his forehead against mine, a smile teasing the corners of his mouth. “I knew it.”
I closed my eyes for a moment to collect my scattered thoughts. “I wish you hadn’t done that.”
I tried to step away, but his arm tightened around me.
“That kiss was only the beginning, the fireworks before the show. Let me loose on you and I’ll make you sing.” With haughty confidence, he leaned in to kiss me again.
“Don’t.” I turned my face to my shoulder.
“Come on, admit it. That was amazing.” The whisper near my ear sent more chills up my spine. “Maybe the best first kiss I’ve ever had.”
It was the best kiss I’d ever had, and the brief taste of him made me want more. While it had been exciting, at most, we’d be a short-term relationship. That was not my thing, and especially not with guys like him.
“It was a nice kiss,” I admitted. “Our first, and our last. I’m not interested.”
“Yes, you are,” he gently insisted, nuzzling my cheek. “You were checking me out all week.”
The hair on the back of my neck stood up. I’d looked too much, too long.
Feeling sick, I pushed away from him and straightened my shoulders. “The point is, we don’t mesh. Our lives are on two totally different planes.”
“I wouldn’t mind floating around in your space for a while.”
“Yeah, that’s the problem—you’re a floating spaceman and I like gravity.”
“Don’t knock me because I haven’t landed yet. I’m exploring.” He leaned against the doorway, crossing his arms, and let a slow grin wind its way across his lips. Even the slight, casual move was somehow sexually disturbing, and I became annoyed with him.
“Some girls really dig guys who have that edgy, searching-for-the-meaning-of-life thing going.”
“I don’t find that to be a good quality in a boyfriend. At least not in someone I’d consider dating. I prefer someone who has an idea of what they want out of life. So whatever you’re imagining might happen between us, it won’t.”
“Ouch.” He leaned back for a beat. “Okay, Claude. I get it. You have big plans, and I’m not part of them.”
Rattled, I sighed. “I didn’t mean to come off sounding so condescending, but I’m leaving for college in a few months. Getting involved with someone now wouldn’t make sense.”
“Who needs to be involved? Friends with benefits works for me.”
“Okay, now you’re just being an ass.”
His smile told me he wasn’t taking this seriously at all. “I should kiss you again. I have a feeling I can change your mind.”
“No!” My breath caught, and I held out my hand in case he tried to come any closer.
Instead, he leaned back, crossed his long legs, and sighed. “Whatever. I know a shitload of other available girls who definitely wouldn’t say no to me.”
My heart twisted. I was the one snuffing the fire so I shouldn’t have been affronted by the taunt.
But still.
“Well, then! I’m glad I didn’t damage your ego!” Stooping, I quickly reclaimed my bag from the floor.
“That’s the good thing about getting thrown around most of your life. You learn how to take a knock.”
I frowned at his comment. “I’m not trying to knock you. I’m just drawing a line.”
“Line acknowledged.” His clipped tone ended the conversation.
13. Toby
I got home from work a few minutes earlier than normal Friday afternoon and waited for Claudia in the foyer. I decided to ignore the balk she played last night. Our kiss had leveled our playing field, and the only game I wanted to keep playing was to make her want to kiss me again.
I watched as Claudia made her way up the steps and how she immediately halted as she came through the door. I positioned myself across the doorway with my arm out so she couldn’t pass. Her eyes flicked to mine, and, clearly annoyed, she sighed.
Her hair was down, not up in the usual ponytail. I liked it that way, and I wondered if she wore it like that for me. The trail
of freckles across her nose drew my attention, and I itched to trace them with my finger. Yet, I only touched her with my eyes, wandering over her face to her long, appealing neck and back to her mouth. I saw her lips part on a breath, and my mouth went dry.
“Back for more?”
Her eyes flashed, and she put a hand on her hip. “Why don’t you go find one of your other ‘available girls’ tonight and leave me alone?”
Ohh, jealousy. Home run.
I leaned in close and whispered, “I’m not used to having to try this hard, but the chase is kind of exciting.”
“I’m here to work. Please, get out of my way,” she glowered.
“Toby.” Julia’s warning voice came from the other room. “Leave the poor girl alone.”
“Ah, saved by your mother.” Claudia pushed my arm away, smug with satisfaction. Turning stiffly, she walked towards the back of the house.
I was embarrassed that Julia might have overheard what I was saying, but I didn’t let on. “There’s always later,” I called to her, and she waved an irritated hand at me. Whistling, I left the house.
I had to let her do her thing with Julia, so I planned on keeping myself busy for a few hours, hanging out over at Ray’s. I called to let him know I was coming over after I went to the store. Without Dev there, it would be an uneventful night. Suited me fine.
On my way to Ray’s, Dario called and asked about hanging out. We made plans to meet back at my house later. I told him to bring April. I wanted Claudia to stay, and April, my secret ally, would ensure that.
I couldn’t stop thinking about Claudia. She was really quite the challenge. Our little sparring felt like a tie score in the deciding game of the World Series. Just like a worthy opponent, she was pushing me to concentrate and play hard.
I was saving up my fast pitch, and I was sure I’d take the win. I wanted it so bad, I could taste it.
When I got to Ray’s, no one answered the door. I found both Ray and his mother stretched out in lawn chairs on their sagging back deck. They were both lit, passing a roach back and forth.
Diane smiled when she saw me and told me to join them. She offered the clip to me, but I shook my head and sat down. Next to me, Ray was completely and thoroughly cooked.
“Is he okay?” I asked his mother.
“Yeah,” Diane said. “When he’s on his meds, the weed makes him even more sleepy.”
The anti-depressants Ray took were supposed to help his stutter—and some of his other issues. When he was on them, he never drank more than a beer or two, but weed was another thing. It was his poison.
“Got anything to drink around here?” I asked.
“Beers are in the fridge. Help yourself,” she said, her smoke-addled voice particularly harsh.
I entered the house through the back door and found a half case of cheap canned beer in the refrigerator. I was pulling a can out when the back door opened and Diane slinked in.
I hadn’t noticed how she was dressed before, but now I couldn’t help it. Skintight jeans and a thin blouse left open a few buttons too low.
“Grab me one, would ya?” she asked.
I took out a second can. I popped both open and held one out to her.
Rather than take the beer, she moved closer. “Thanks,” she said.
With my height advantage, I had a clear view down the front of her shirt. Her black lace bra seemed to be suffering under extreme duress, barely holding onto those radically modified mammaries, the material was begging for mercy. A quick flick of the straps would set them free. For a brief moment, I wondered if they felt real.
Playful, she walked her fingers up my chest, “Want to fool around?”
I laughed. “Wow, you’re really stoned, aren’t you?”
“No. I’m really horny.”
Holy shit.
I pushed her hand away. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
With a man-eating smile, she arched her shoulders back, pushing her rack into my airspace. “You’re not a little boy. We’re both consenting adults.”
I couldn’t help but look down at what she was offering me. I exhaled sharply.
“You’re not afraid of an older woman, are you?”
“Afraid?” I laughed darkly. “No, I’ve been with older women before. Just not my friend’s mother.” I let my eyes drop again, openly admiring her jugs before I looked back at her face and said, “If it weren’t for that, we wouldn’t be talking right now.”
“Oh, my,” she cooed. Pulling at the hem of my tee shirt, she smiled. “It’s really too bad you and Ray are such good friends. But then, you were always a better friend to Ray than that other one.”
As if on cue, I heard a distinct loud engine out front. Dev’s Cutlass. Moments later, he stalked into the house, shouting for Ray, his heavy footsteps echoing through the Rudacks’ small, one-story house. He filled the kitchen doorway and eyed Diane and me. Diane moved away.
“And speak of the Devil,” she said under her breath. “Hi, Dev. Ray’s out in the yard,” she told him, all sweetness. Before she left, she looked at me and lifted an eyebrow. “If you change your mind, I’ll be around.”
She left us alone in the kitchen and went out back.
“Fuck me. What was that?” Dev reached forward and clapped my shoulder. “Women are just throwing their panties at you. You are my goddamn idol, man.”
“It was nothing,” I insisted. This was our first face-to-face since the fight at the party.
“Yeah, right. I’m just glad to see you, you piece of shit. I missed you, bro.”
I ignored him and started towards the door.
“What? You still not talking to me?” Dev moved fast and stood in my way. I tried to go around him, but he blocked me.
Steeling myself, I looked straight ahead. “I’m leaving. Get out of my way.”
The backdoor opened, and Ray shuffled in. Dev turned to look, and I used the distraction to pass by and head out the front door.
Dev followed me outside, Ray not far behind.
“Tell me this is not over that girl at the party, your mom’s helper,” he demanded.
I hesitated to answer just a split second, but he caught it. “Holy shit. It is.”
“Shut up,” I snapped. “This is not about her.”
“Then what?”
I halted, took a breath, and swung around to face him. “It’s the way you went after that guy that night. It was fucking unprovoked, man. I can’t be a part of that kind of shit anymore.”
“Ah, stop being a fucking girl,” Dev chuckled. “You used to love nothing better than a good fight. That’s all it was. Forget about it,” he said, reaching out to shake my shoulder again.
“Stop,” I warned him, but he smacked me upside the head in a gruff jokey way instead. Aggravated the shit out of me. I raised my fists in front of me protectively. “Leave me the fuck alone.”
“What the hell is up with you? The Faye I used to know never gave a shit about laws, screwing with a girl, or busting a guy up. What happened to him?”
Ever since I’d been home, I’d allowed myself to be sucked back in. I didn’t want this.
“Last time I hung out with you, I got hauled into a police interrogation. Christ, stabbing someone—that’s serious shit.” I gritted my teeth. “And honestly, man, I have enough to deal with. I don’t want to hang with you anymore.”
Dev sucked in deeply and spit out a thick lugie. “You’re afraid.”
He was so pathetic, his big, slow brain didn’t get it. I found it kind of funny and laughed.
“You laughing at me?”
“Oh, yeah, I am.”
“Fuck you,” he barked. Leaning forward, he spat down at my feet. A large glob of his disgusting dribble landed perfectly on top of my left sneaker.
Before I let myself react, I tried to remember that was exactly what he wanted. I wasn’t about to give it to him.
“Whatever. Just leave me out of your fucking stupid, ass-backward shit.” And then I made
a mistake; I turned my back on him.
The next thing I knew, my head was bouncing off the wheel well of my Jeep, and I was on my ass in the dirt driveway.
“That’s for last Saturday. And just a little reminder that I can take you down whenever, and if ever, I fucking want to.” Dev’s upper lip curled with a sneer.
I laughed again even as I felt my brow beginning to swell. The trickle of blood tickled my face.
“Why the hell are you laughing?” Dev turned to Ray, who just stood there, stoned and staring. “Can you believe this fucking asshole? He just lost his best friend, and he’s laughing his motherfucking ass off.” I couldn’t hear anything else Dev said as he walked away. I only stopped laughing when I heard his car engine rev, and I knew he was gone.
Claudia was waiting in the living room ready to leave when I got in. Prepared to make a quick escape, no doubt. Not far behind me, Dario and April were just coming up the driveway as I wobbled into the house. The two of them were probably wondering what had happened to me.
“Hey,” I waved to Claudia. Ignoring her startled stare at the bloody rag I held to my forehead, I went to the kitchen to clean myself up. Her keys jangled as she dropped them on the coffee table and followed, hot on my heels.
“You’re bleeding! What happened?”
“Got clocked by my own Jeep,” I told her, pretending to be embarrassed.
“Dude, you tripping? Like, for real?” Dario asked, coming into the house. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw April go to Claude and give her a hug.
“Yeah. Two left feet.”
“I’d say it looks like you were in a fight,” Claudia eyed me.
I looked away knowing I was just confirming it. She muttered ‘liar’ under her breath and slipped in next to me at the sink, both of us blotting at the cut.
“Do you think you’ll need stitches?”
“I don’t think so. It’s just bleeding like a bitch.”
“Let me take a look.” She pulled a chair out from under the table and motioned for me to sit.
Saving Toby Page 10
