One hand gripped his cock, his fingers guiding the heavy stalk of flesh as he hovered over her. She watched him grab the condom he had dropped on the stand beside her bed earlier, staring appreciatively as he fitted the rubber over his erection. Then he leaned over her and placed his hips between her thighs, his gaze locking on hers, and Kayla felt her breath catch. Scorching hot, throbbing, pulsing with demand, as the flared crest pressed against her opening. Tilting her hips to him, her gaze following Jaxon’s as it slid down the center of their bodies. She watched and quickly gasped, a whimper leaving her lips as the dark, flushed head began stretching her, parting the sensitive entrance as he began working it inside her.
The swollen folds of her pussy flared out around it, cupping the very tip of his cock until it penetrated her. Slick, soaking with her juices, the snug flesh of her entrance began cupping the crest little by little as he worked it against her.
Sensual flames ignited as she struggled to accept him, her sex tightening, clenching, then releasing around the wide crest working its way into the suckling heat.
Lifting her knees to grip his hips, Kayla was unable to turn away from the sight of it. She couldn’t help herself as she both felt and watched the steady impalement of her pussy. The blistering eroticism of the act amped her own arousal to a height she couldn’t have imagined reaching before.
She wasn’t going to just fly into release when it came — she was going to explode into it.
“Fuck yes,” he moaned, a dark, rough groan that caressed her senses as the head of his cock disappeared inside her greedy flesh.
Where it was stopped by the heavy, flexing muscles inside her sensitive vagina.
Not that Jaxon was about to let that actually stop him.
The pleasure increased for both of them as she was forced to stop watching the penetration, her head falling back and a cry whispering past her lips.
“Fuck me,” she moaned, her need for him obliterating everything, anything else. “Please, Jaxon. Hard. Fuck me hard. Now.”
She wanted that bite of pain. She needed to feel it as his cock slid inside her hard and fast.
“Are you sure, baby?” His lips fell to her neck. He was unable to watch himself possess her for even another second but desperate to tease them both with the pleasure just a little longer. “Are you very sure this is what you want?”
“Damn you, fuck me,” she cried out.
His hips stilled, bunched.
“Yes. Yes.” He was going to give it. She could feel him tensing, preparing to surge inside her.
There was no way to prepare herself for the coming sensations. Pleasure. Pain. A fiery combination of both sensations so extreme she knew a part of her wouldn’t survive it.
Blazing.
The first, hard thrust buried him only inches inside her, not even half of the hardened length of his cock filling her. It struck a match to the already blazing wash of feelings and sent ecstatic pleasure careening through her body.
Before she could process one sensation, he retreated then returned, amplifying it, throwing her so hard, so fast into another level she couldn’t even process the full scope of how each felt.
They clashed together in burning, surging waves of pleasure so extreme that pleasure and pain merged.
Stretching, agony and ecstasy, burning heat and a heavy, erotic stroke that almost eased it, then suddenly made each sensation glow brighter, erupt with greater intensity than any other time he’d touched her.
Her hips writhed beneath each heavy thrust, her breath rasping in her throat as she gasped, whimpered, and couldn’t find the air to cry out.
All she could do was hold on to Jaxon and pray she lived through the ride.
Coming over her fully, he let one hand grip her thigh, his other elbow braced at her shoulder as his powerful knees spread her thighs wide, dug into the bed. His muscular hips powering every fierce penetration of his body into hers and pushing her closer to an edge she was already poised to race over.
Closer.
Each hard stroke of his cock shafting to the depths of her pussy dragged an agonized cry from her lips. Pleasure screamed through her. Each penetration ratcheted sexual tension deeper, higher, until every cell was at peak reception, peak sensitivity.
“Please, please—” She was crying the word, barely aware of it slipping past her lips as a chant, a plea, the only way she had of begging for release.
“God, yes,” he groaned, his breathing rough and heavy as his lips parted at her neck, spreading kisses over the sensitive flesh there.
“So fucking good. So fucking good and so fucking tight. And so fucking— Ah God, Kayla. Baby—”
His lips reached the uplifted curve of her breast, the brutally tight tip of her nipple. Covering the hard peak and sucking it into the heat of his mouth, he set off a chain reaction inside her body that destroyed her.
The lightning stroke of sensation began at her nipple, struck with brutal pleasure to her tightening pussy, then the painfully swollen bud of her clit.
Each strike of agonizing bliss sparked a reaction until that chaotic abyss she’d been reaching for so desperately finally enveloped her.
Sensation shot from her sex through the rest of her body. It exploded and surged through her like a tidal wave.
Ecstasy tore through her system at the impact.
Complete. Perfect. Pleasure.
Rapture.
Her eyes flew open. Her gaze caught with his, locked, widened, and felt that rapture detonate as two hard, deep thrusts buried Jaxon to the hilt inside the tightening flesh, the milking, fluttering waves of her release triggering his own.
With a groan, they both fell to the bed, Kayla’s hands slowly scoring his back as she struggled to retain the senses she just lost in that climax. After a few seconds, as she found herself slowly drifting off to sleep, she felt him push himself up and cried out in protest, clutching at his chest.
“Need to clean up here, babe,” he informed her, his voice thick and dark with satisfaction. She heard the sound of water in the bathroom, then a few seconds later, the bed dipped, and his arm curved around her stomach. Sighing in contentment, Kayla fell asleep, the soft beat of the heart inside the chest resting against her back the most perfect of lullabies.
12
Kayla slowly blinked awake and rolled over to her side, disoriented. Then the events of the night before came crashing back, and suddenly, the empty space beside her felt much colder. She turned around, listening to hear Jaxon somewhere on the bus, and instead saw a sheet of paper propped on the nightstand. She grabbed it, already guessing, and denying what she was sure would be its contents. Eyes on the first line, she began to read.
You look so cute asleep, I didn’t want to wake you up. Had a nice time yesterday, and you can’t begin to imagine how honored I am that we got to do that. Anyway, the repairs on my bus have been completed, and I’ll be moving in today. Won’t be back in time before your flight, so wanted to say thank you for the wonderful experience of going on tour with you. I had a really great time. Jaxon.
Kayla felt her heart break into two jagged pieces, her back falling to the bed as tears rolled down her face, her heart splintering. The pain a continuous loop that had her shoving the sheets into her mouth to silence the keening wail that broke out from her throat. In that moment, she realized she finally had the irrefutable proof she had always sought. A lonely heart was indeed better than a broken one.
13
“That was a great show out there,” Addy commented as she walked behind Jaxon into his tour bus. Jaxon just grunted, walked towards his fridge, and grabbed the bottle of Jack Daniels he had started on the day before. Forgoing a cup, he twisted the cap and lifted the bottle to his lips.
“Whoa, what the hell is going on?” Addy asked, staring at the bottle in his hand. “Are we having a problem here?”
“No problem, Addy. Just leave me alone.”
She planted her feet in front of him, crossing her hands, and waiting until h
e was finally forced to look at her. “What do you want?”
“Nothing.” She shrugged. “Kayla landed safely back in New York.” She dropped that information and saw the small tensing of his lips when he heard Kayla’s name. “What the hell did you do, Jaxon?” she asked wearily, dropping onto the chair beside him.
“I haven’t done anything, I swear,” he protested forcefully, almost as if he were trying to convince himself of something.
“If I find out you hurt that poor girl, I’m walking out on you. And I mean that, Jaxon.” Addy pointed a finger at him.
“You can stop protecting her, okay,” Jaxon muttered. “She is a big girl, you know. She can take care of herself.”
“Usually, yes. But when it comes to you, I don’t think she has the ability to see things clearly.”
Jaxon sat up a bit, glancing at her from the corner of his eye. “What do you mean?”
“I remember the first day she saw you. We were going into Gold Records offices to finalize talks on her deal. I mean, she was so good we didn’t have any problem with our demands. Do you remember flirting with her without knowing who she really was?”
Jaxon nodded his head slowly, remembering that day quite clearly. “Yes, I do.”
“Well, Kayla was smitten, kind of. I mean it was not hard to do, the way she was smiling at you, blushing so hard and talking as if she needed to impress you or something. I knew you, knew your reputation, so I hustled her out of there as fast as I could. Couldn’t have you making her another one of the many celebrities you slept with. We finished the meeting and were on our way to the car. Kayla was trying to maneuver me into her getting to see you once again. Then she came outside and saw you helping this big-chested blonde into your car. I’ve never seen her look so hurt. She hated you after that, hated you more when I came to work for you, and I told myself that knowing the real you would have divested her of that silly crush. Now, I’m thinking I was wrong.” She looked at Jaxon, and he got the sense that she was really angry at him. “I’m thinking that you two spent a couple of days together, and you were so charming that you woke those feelings again. You got what you wanted, and now, as usual, you want nothing to do with her. Tell me I’m wrong, Jaxon. Please tell me I am wrong.”
“Hey, she came on to me. I didn’t do a thing,” Jaxon insisted, lifting the bottle to his lips and taking a swig.
“No, you didn’t do a thing.” Addy stood up, sounding disgusted by him. “You just acted like the asshole you’ve always been.” With a shake of her head, she stomped out of the bus.
Jaxon heard her slam the door and tried to tell himself he didn’t care. It wasn’t like he’d done anything wrong. He warned her, didn’t he? And the last time she had made the smallest indication of stopping, he had stopped. Even though that had been the hardest thing he had ever had to do in his entire life. But yesterday, there were no stops. She was just as eager as he was, begged for it even. She knew the score, knew who he was before she allowed him to put his hands on her body.
Why then, he wondered, did he feel like absolute crap? The sex had been brain numbingly good. No one had ever responded like Kayla had done under his touch. It was like she didn’t know how to hold back, save a part of her soul from him like all his previous sexual partners had learned to do. So she gave him her everything, opening herself to him in every way possible. And in doing so, gave him the greatest pleasure he had ever experienced.
Then he woke up to see her snoring gently on her side, her arms laying gently against his skin, and his only thought was that this was how he wanted to wake up for the rest of his life. With Kayla in his arms. That revelation had been enough to really wake him up. He didn’t do relationships, never had, and wasn’t planning on getting in one anytime soon. So he did what he needed to do to make sure she remembered who he was. Or maybe it was to make sure she stayed away from him because he knew if she gave him half a chance, he was going to grab it with both hands and be grateful to get that much from her.
The note he had dropped on her nightstand was no different from dozens of others he had written over the years. Only difference this time was the well of guilt that plagued his heart as he wrote it.
No, not guilt. He was happy he was rid of her. Besides, his playboy status was one of the hallmarks of his career. His shows were packed with screaming ladies from wall to wall. He was right in what he did, Jaxon told himself. Noble even, because he had sacrificed what they could have for the sake of their careers. Only, as he took another sip of the contents of the bottle in his hand, the mind-numbing sensation the bottle promised still unable to quiet the thoughts in his mind, Jaxon wondered if the result had been worth the sacrifice.
14
February thirteenth. Kayla struggled with the shopping bags in her hands, managing to dump them in the backseat of her car. The smile on her face was wide and carefree, ensuring that the pictures being taken by a group of paparazzi behind her would show her happy. The moment she slammed the door shut, the mask fell off, and her lips dropped down. One thing she had learned in the last twenty-four hours was that if she ever failed at music, then she would have a wonderful career in acting. One television show and one radio interview, and no one had been able to guess the true emotions in her heart. Not even when they had brought up the rumors about her and Jaxon again. She had thought her cheeks would crack from how hard it was to lift her lips up then. But she had done it. Had gotten through the interviews without giving anything away.
Her album dropped at midnight, exactly on the stroke of ushering in Valentine’s Day. An album where she had talked about love and all the beautiful things that came with it. Kind of ironic that she had to promote that album now with a broken heart. But Jaxon had broken her heart — she was not going to let him destroy her career too. All around her, the color red proclaimed the season. Flowers seemed to bloom everywhere, and even more telling was the fact that people seemed to want to physically proclaim their love now. Lots of hand holding and kissing. She had seen a couple of men alone in the lingerie shop she had stopped at. Picking up gifts for their partners, no doubt. She hated to hear herself sound cynical. One more thing she was blaming Jaxon for.
Well, she bought herself a bottle of wine and a box of chocolate. She was going to have herself a party and cry, then tomorrow, when her album dropped, she would finally have something to take her mind off him.
15
Kayla heard a knock on her door and ran to it. Sally was finally here, and Kayla couldn’t be happier to see her. Barely twelve noon and her album sales were already picking up steam. At this rate, she would soon outsell her two previous albums. She had been following the sales online, enduring the constant reminder of the occasion that popped out at her. At least the album launch had worked to help get her mind off Jaxon.
“Sal—” she started to say, then stopped when she saw who was at the door. The pain that lanced through her heart was the catalyst of the anger that followed on its heels. She hated the fact that he could cause her so much pain, hated it so much that she hated him. “What the hell are you doing here?” she demanded, then gasped as he pushed past her and entered her apartment. He was wearing a baseball cap, and Kayla faintly noticed that his eyes were red.
He looked at her, and if he was any other person, Kayla would have rushed to ask him what was wrong. But it was Jaxon, and her voice was just as steely as the first time when she asked again, “What the hell are you doing here?”
When he still refused to answer, just looked at her with a gaze that seemed to peer into her very soul, she held the door open. “You know what? I don’t want to know. Just get out!”
He seemed to consider the door, then looked back at her before opening his mouth to start talking. “I’d leave Kayla, but you’ve already got something of mine, and I don’t think I want it back.”
She stared at him, confused, then shook her head. “I’m not in the mood for this shit, Jaxon, so leave now.” Then in a quieter voice, “Please leave. I’m just starting to
forget about you.” Her voice broke at that, and she squeezed her eyes shut to hold back tears.
“But you see, Kayla, I can’t let you do that.” He started to pace around the living room, eyes flickering around but seeing nothing. “The first day I met you, I knew you were trouble from the instant I saw you. It wasn’t love. No, it wasn’t. At least that is what I told myself. But it was enough to make me scared. And then I saw you again, and for some reason I couldn’t figure out, you were mad at me. Which was fine by me, because it meant I didn’t have to deal with whatever scared me about you.”
He stopped in front of her, looking into her eyes, and Kayla couldn’t look away if she wanted to. She couldn’t talk, just listen.
“Then I spent those days in that bus with you, and all of a sudden, you didn’t hate me anymore. Which meant I had to deal with it now, and it was easy when I thought it was just physical. It was easy when all I had to worry about was your mouth on mine, our bodies connecting that way. I could deal with physical.”
Kayla’s heart fluttered in pain, a single tear threatening to slip down. She opened her mouth to talk, and he lifted a finger to silence her.
“That morning, I woke up to see you lying next to me, and it became clear what it was I was really dealing with, and it scared me because I wasn’t ready for it. I didn’t want to deal with it. So I pushed you away as best as I could.”
“Yes,” Kayla finally spoke, not caring that her words came out shaky. “By showing me who you really are.”
“No, Kayla, by showing you who I was.” He dropped his hand, and his head. “By showing you who I was before you stole my heart.”
Kayla’s body went still with shock. She stood there speechless, wondering what he was seeking to accomplish. Then her lips curled in anger. “You bastard,” she shrieked, beating against his chest. “It wasn’t enough that you hurt me then, you want to do it again. You won’t stop until you finish me. You’re taunting me because I am attracted to you? Did you enjoy the first round so much you want to have a go at me again? You know, take my body and then rip my heart to pieces for the post-op?”
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