“I’m sorry.” He deserved an apology. “At the time it didn’t seem so much like a choice.”
“I asked you to marry me. I asked you to be my wife and spend the rest of your life with me.”
Shame wrapped its icy grip around my heart and squeezed. “I know.”
“Do you? Do you really know what it was like when you left? How long it took me to pull myself up out of the dark hole you left me in and try to start living again?”
A tear rolled down my cheek. I couldn’t erase his pain any more than I could have changed the answer I’d given him.
“I’m sorry, Jake. Can we meet for coffee? Or maybe breakfast at the Lovebird?” The question slipped out before I’d realized I’d suggested meeting up at the last place we’d seen each other—the place where he’d proposed.
His voice came through the phone, strained and tight. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. Why don’t you go back to Omaha?”
Why didn’t I go back to Omaha? Seemed like a logical thing to do based on the frosty reception I’d received in Swallow Springs. But when I thought of my lonely apartment, a wave of resolved crashed over me. I didn’t want to cause Jake any more pain. I’d put him through enough. He deserved to be happy. But I’d tried to move on without him and the truth, was, I couldn’t.
“I can’t leave yet. Not without having a chance to talk.”
“You wanna talk?”
“Yes.”
“And then you’ll leave? Go back to Nebraska and not bother me again?”
“I promise. Just give me an hour of your time.”
“Fine.” He practically growled out the word. “Tonight. Seven o’clock. We’re celebrating my Grandma Duncan’s birthday at the VFW. I’ll see you there.”
“Wait, that’s not—”
He’d hung up. I set my phone down in front of me. If he thought making me swallow my pride and parade myself around in front of his entire family would make me lose my nerve, he should know better. There was no question in my mind as to whether or not I’d go to the party. The only thing I needed to figure out was what to wear to his great-grandmother’s birthday party—a woman who wouldn’t be able to stand the sight of me.
6
Jake
“Dammit.” I caught sight of a head of shiny brown hair, so dark it bordered on black at times. Misty hadn’t backed down. I didn’t really think she would, but when I suggested she come to Grandma Duncan’s party, I’d expected a little resistance.
She had on a cherry red halter top that hugged at her curves and a pair of white shorts that showed off her legs. Legs I could remember wrapped around me, squeezing my mid-section as I rocked into her over and over again.
I cleared my throat, trying to erase the erotic visions playing through my mind. Misty and I had been hot together. Not just sizzling, but couldn’t-keep-our-hands-off-each-other hot. We used to take every chance we could get to spend some skin-on-skin time. Didn’t matter when or where, we were always ready to go. That feeling of wanting her, of needing her, hadn’t gone away. If anything, it had intensified over the year apart, especially now when she showed up in something like that damn halter.
Before Misty caught sight of me, my sister descended on her. Heather was a couple of years older than me and even though I towered over her now, she always considered me her baby brother. No one had been more gutted than me when Misty and I broke up, but Heather came in a close second. She and Misty had been friends—kind of like the sister neither of them had.
I stayed close to the edge of the room, moving around the perimeter to get closer to where the two women stood locked in a face off.
Prone to being a little overly dramatic, Heather clamped her hands to her hips. Her eyes widened while her mouth moved like someone had pressed a fast forward button.
Misty matched her stance. A full head shorter than my sister, what she lacked in height, she made up for in the way she used her entire body when she spoke. Hands flew, hips cocked, tongues wagged. If I didn’t get over there soon, they’d steal the limelight from Grandma Duncan and none of us would ever hear the end of it.
I approached Misty from behind. Heather’s gaze shifted from Misty to me as I joined the two of them in the center of the room.
“Who invited her?” Heather asked.
Misty whirled around to face me, her cheeks flushed with color.
“I did.” Grinning, I shrugged my shoulders. “Misty wanted to chat, and since we were busy tonight, I invited her to come along.”
“Speaking of chatting”—Misty put her hand on my arm—“can we talk for a few minutes?”
“Grandma’s about to cut the cake. It would be a shame for you to miss it.” Heather’s jaw clenched.
Misty glanced from Heather to me. “I’m so sorry for the way things happened. I never meant to hurt you.”
“Didn't quite seem that way when you left town,” Heather interjected from behind my shoulder.
I sighed, dragging out an exhale. “The way I see it, we don't have anything left to say to each other, Misty. I think you covered it all when you walked away.”
Her hand tightened on my arm. “I told you I didn't have a choice.”
“You always have a choice.” I shook my head, gently pulling my arm away.
“Not at the time. If I hadn’t left Swallow Springs, we were going to end up stuck in a future that everyone else had planned out for us.”
Heather rolled her eyes. I ignored her, and tried to focus all of my attention on obliterating the hope that bloomed in my gut. “That’s a lie. We could have had something special, but instead you chose to leave.”
“Please…” She reached for my hand but I tucked it into my pocket instead. “What do you want me to do? What do I need to do to prove I'm ready to do this for good this time?”
I shrugged, not willing to get into it with her, especially not here. Not in front of my entire family. Inviting her had been a mistake.
“You must hate me.” Her words came out soft, making me want to ease her pain.
I met her gaze. “Go back to Omaha. There’s nothing left for you here.”
“Yeah, go back to Omaha and get a life while you’re at it,” Heather said.
“I do have a life there. A lonely life.” Misty looked from Heather to me. “A life without you. I've tried to move on but I can't. Do you think I wanted to come back here? Kneel at your feet and ask for forgiveness?”
I let out a soft chuckle. “Yeah, I’ve gotta say that's really not your style.”
Heather shifted close. “Jake, you're not buying this are you?”
“Can you give us a minute?” I asked my sister. While I appreciated the fact she wanted to shield my feelings, I didn’t need or want her help. I could handle giving Misty the brush off on my own.
“Looks like they’re about to sing.” Heather nodded toward the front of the room where my mom helped Grandma Duncan settle into a chair. “We’d better move closer.”
“Come on.” I motioned for Misty to follow. Heather and I threaded through the crowd that had gathered in front of my great-grandma. Pastel colored streamers hung from the ceiling, draping down to attach to the back of her chair, making it look like she sat on a throne.
Mom started singing. Grandma joined in, singing to herself at the top of her lungs. Her eyes lit on everyone in turn, her smile full of cheer. Until she reached Misty.
“Misty Greene!” she shrieked.
My face flamed. The heat burned down my entire body, all the way to my toes. Everyone's gaze turned toward us, searching for the source of grandma’s surprise. A few of the older relatives continued to sing, but everyone else stopped.
Grandma Duncan put a gnarled hand on the arm of her chair and slowly propelled herself to a standing position. “What in tarnation are you doing at my birthday party?”
7
Misty
Jake’s mom reached out and wrapped her hand around Grandma Duncan’s elbow to steady her. If anyone had a reason to be ups
et about me and Jake's break up, it was Grandma Duncan. She had her heart set on meeting her great-great-grandbaby before she turned one-hundred or keeled over. She told me as much time and again when Jake and I had gone to visit her. We used to sit in her parlor sipping sweet tea and nibbling on butter cookies.
When I left town I hadn't said goodbye. And now, shrinking under her stare, I had to remind myself that I was a full grown woman. I’d made the best decision I could at the time. And not even Grandma Duncan could make me think otherwise.
She advanced one shaky step at a time until she stood right in front of me. Her gnarled pointer finger poked into my chest. “How dare you show your face at my birthday party. I’ve never been so disappointed in anyone in my life. That's saying a lot since I’m ninety-six years old, and I've been on God’s green earth for a damn long time.”
Jake put a hand on his great-grandmother’s arm. “Grandma, I know you’re a little shocked, but don’t let a little surprise ruin the entire evening.”
“A little surprise?” Grandma Duncan turned on Jake, poking her finger into his chest instead. “Who invited this traitor into our mix?”
“I think you're overreacting a little,” Jake said.
“Overreacting? Isn't this the woman who left you high and dry after you proposed? Turned you down point blank after leading you on for years?”
“It wasn't really like that.” Jake wrapped his hand around his grandma's finger, and tried to turn her back to her chair. But Grandma would have nothing to do with that. Instead she wrested her hand away from him and turned her steely blue gaze back to me.
“I don't know what you're up to, missy, but you better leave my grandson out of it. Now let’s get on with this party and cut the cake.” She reached for the knife and stabbed it into the center of the cake.
“Grandma, let me help you with that.” Jake took the knife from her and cut a large piece off the corner. “Here you go. Birthday girl gets the first piece.”
Grandma Duncan took the paper plate in hand.
I stepped forward, not wanting the conversation to end this way. “Mrs. Duncan, I'm so sorry for what happened before. Like I told Jake, all I want to do is talk.”
She whipped around faster than I thought she would have been able to. Faster than she should have based on the way she’d wobbled toward me.
I put out a hand to steady her. She swatted me away. That wouldn’t have been a problem except she forgot she was holding a plate full of cake. The cake vaulted toward me, hitting me in the chest, dousing me with a generous dollop of buttercream in the form of roses. Then the square of cake rolled down my body, depositing big globs of blue icing all the way down.
Everyone stood in silence as the piece of cake bounced onto the floor.
My cheeks tingled as my vision blurred around the edges. “Mrs. Duncan…”
Jake shot me an apologetic look that practically begged me not to make a scene. Then he maneuvered his grandmother around as fast as he could. “Let's get you back to your seat.”
Jake's mom had been quiet through the entire exchange. She looked at me now with disappointment on her face. “I think you’d better go.”
“But—”
“Jake doesn’t need you in his life. Why don’t you head on home and leave my boy alone?”
A sob ballooned in my chest. I couldn’t break down here. Biting my lower lip, I turned toward the door. I had to get out. As I burst through the door into the parking lot, the warm air surrounded me. I gulped in mouthfuls, trying to staunch the flow of feelings. Feelings I didn’t want to acknowledge, much less experience, especially on enemy turf.
I finally reached the car. My heartbeat slowed, and I leaned against the door. Breath by breath, I pulled myself back together.
“Misty.” Jake's hand landed on my shoulder, and he spun me around. “I'm sorry. I shouldn’t have invited you. I didn't know how my family would react.”
I swiped at the frosting, trying to wipe it off my pants. “It’s fine. I should have known better.”
He caught my hand. His large fingers wrapped gently around my wrist. “What exactly is it that you want from me?”
I glanced up, trying to ignore the fact that I probably had two cups of frosting decorating my front side. “I just want to know if we have a chance.”
“All I ever wanted was you by my side. You in my life. A future together. But now…” his voice trailed off.
“Now what?”
“How can you expect me to trust that you're not going to leave again? I wasn't enough for you then. How do I know things will be any different now?”
I reached for his hands. Buttercream squished between us. He didn’t seem to notice or if he did, he didn’t care. “I've been doing a lot of thinking. I want you back. I want to do all those things we talked about in the past. Build a future together. Have kids.”
“You know I never want to leave Swallow Springs. Are you ready to move back here and settle into your old life? I'm a small-town guy…I always will be. That wasn't enough for you then. Is it now?”
My brain spun. The truth was, I didn't know what kind of life I could have in Swallow Springs. But I knew one thing—a life without Jake was no life at all. “When I left, I felt like everyone had our lives planned out for us. It was all mapped out to where you and I didn’t have any say in our future. So I moved to Omaha, found a job, and lived on my own. I did all the things that nobody thought I'd ever be able to do. And I proved to myself I could do it.”
“Without me.”
My eyes welled with unshed tears as I gave a slight nod. “That was the worst part. But now I know I'm strong enough.”
His brow creased. “Misty, you've always been strong. You’re one of the strongest women I know. But what I still don’t get, is why the hell couldn't you do that here?”
How could I explain that I had to leave in order to find myself? “I don't expect you to fully understand, but I never wanted to hurt you. I wouldn't have come back if I wasn’t ready.”
“So you're willing to leave everything behind? Your job, your apartment, your life in the city? And come back to Swallow Springs for me?”
I could tell he didn't believe me by the way his shoulders tensed. “All I'm asking for is a chance—a chance for me to prove it to you.”
He pulled his hands away from mine and glanced at the frosting coating his fingers. “I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.”
“Do you have any feelings left for me?”
“Of course I do,” he said. “I mean, I loved you.”
Past tense…was that intentional? “Can you love me again?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know.”
A sharp pain pierced my heart. But I’d take “I don’t know” over a “no” any day. Never one to be patient, I resisted the urge to ask him how long it might take. When did he think he might know if he could fall in love with me again?
“I know that's not what you probably want to hear,” he said.
I nodded. “You’re right. But I'm not giving up.”
He shrugged. “You still want to chat?”
I nodded.
“How about coffee tomorrow morning? Before I head into work?”
“That sounds great. Seven o’clock? At the Lovebird Café?”
“Sure. We can start there.”
I wanted to hug him, bury myself in his arms. Instead, I smiled, hoping I could convey with my eyes everything he needed to know I meant what I’d said.
“Sorry about tonight.” He shook his head and glanced at his frosting-covered hands. “I didn’t count on Grandma Duncan getting so upset.”
I wiped my hands on my shorts, they were ruined anyway. Then I got into the car and buckled up. “Your family loves you, they're just trying to protect you.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Hopefully your grandma can forgive me.”
“She’ll come around.”
“I’m looking forward to tomorrow.”
“See y
ou then.”
I pulled away. If I knew one thing about the Duncan women, I knew they held grudges. Especially when someone wounded one of their own. Now I needed to either abandon my mission and consider it a botched attempt or find a way to not only win Jake back, but also win over the rest of his family.
I had a hard road ahead of me. And I’d start first thing in the morning with coffee at the Lovebird Café.
8
Jake
“So, are you going to give her a shot?” Robbie asked.
“Hell if I know. What do you think I should do?”
He took a swig from his beer. “I don't know. Misty’s a force to be reckoned with. You think she means what she says?”
“Who does that? Who disappears for over a year then walks back into somebody's life and expects to be welcomed with open arms?”
“I think you’ve got two choices,” Robbie held up one finger. “You give her a chance, let her lead the way, and see what she's got in mind.”
“Or?” I asked.
He lifted a second finger, his middle finger. “Or you tell her to go fuck herself.”
“Shut up. You know I’m not going to do that.” I lifted my beer to my mouth and took a sip. Maybe it had been a mistake to ask Robbie to come out for a beer. He wasn’t exactly the best person to ask for relationship advice. His track record was even worse than mine.
He elbowed me in the ribs. “Do you remember what it felt like when she left the last time?”
“It felt like she hulled out my chest, emptied it so there was nothing left but a black hole. It took me months to sort through it all.” I was pissed as hell at even the thought of going through something like that twice. “There’s no way I can handle that again.”
Sweetest Obsessions - Anthology Page 308
