by Sharon Sala
The irony that God had dealt his own brand of justice in this case was blatantly apparent, but he hadn’t bothered to mention it to anyone else. When he entered the foyer, he approached John and Poppy with his usual grace.
“John. Poppy. I’m so sorry for the delay. As you can see it’s been a difficult night for several families. Please follow me. Unfortunately, dear Poppy, you know the routine. If there’s anything about your father that you want changed, you have only to ask.”
John had already seen his dad, but this would be her first time.
“You okay, Poppy?”
She was tight-lipped and pale, but her gaze was steady.
“I’m not okay, but I’m ready.”
They followed Truman into the viewing room. He shut the door behind them and led the way to the casket.
“This is a fine casket,” Truman said. “I like the inlay of wood here, don’t you? It’s a nice, masculine touch.” He brushed a non-existent speck from the lapel of Jessup’s sport coat then straightened the collar on his shirt. “I’ll give you a few minutes before I come back,” he said, then quietly left the room.
Poppy stared down into the casket, afraid she would see the trauma her father had suffered, but to her relief, he appeared to be sleeping.
She felt empty. She wanted him to wake up and tell her he still loved her no matter what, but it wasn’t going to happen. She would have to live the rest of her life without hearing him say it was okay that she wasn’t his. She needed to cry, but the tears wouldn’t come, which added another layer of sadness to what was left of her world. She gripped the edges of the casket then couldn’t bring herself to touch him.
“Daddy, it’s me, Poppy. We know what happened. We know everything. I’m so sorry. You’ll always be my daddy, no matter what anybody says.”
John eyes were burning and there was a pain in his chest the size of his fist. His dad had been such a vital part of his life that he couldn’t imagine it without him. But it was Poppy that had him worried. He kept watching her, afraid that she would freak.
After a few moments of silence, John put his arm around her shoulder.
“I know this sound weird, but I’m actually relieved. This is a far better image to have in my head than the one from the morgue.”
Poppy felt numb. “Are you okay with how he looks?”
He nodded. “He has his wedding band and I had Truman put the pictures from his wallet into his jacket pocket. I figured if he carried them all that time when he was alive, that he’d want to take them with him.”
“Are they there?” Poppy asked.
John slid a finger inside the pocket and felt the edges of the photos.
“Yeah, they’re there.”
“I don’t want anything changed.”
“Neither do I,” John said. “So do you want to stay or-“
“No. I’m just so tired. I want to go home.”
“Then home it is.” He paused to lay a hand on Jessup’s chest. “Be seein’ you, Dad.”
When they walked out Truman was waiting. “Do you approve?”
“Yes, he looks good, and that’s a relief,” John said.
Truman was pleased. “I understand. Should any of your friends ask, he is ready for viewing. I’ll see you day after tomorrow at the church.”
They walked away, silently grateful to be leaving a place of such despair.
****
Poppy got the bathroom first and finished her bath, then went into her bedroom and dug some flannel pajamas out of storage. The wind had come up about an hour ago, making the house harder to hold heat. The days were already getting chilly and the nights were downright cold. The furnace was churning out heat to the rooms, giving the house a warm, cozy feel.
Pastor Harvard had asked her about her daddy’s eulogy and what songs they wanted sung at the service, but she was drawing a blank. She couldn’t quit thinking about the funeral home. Jessup had been alone in the morgue, and now he was alone in that viewing room. Maybe they should have stayed.
She was still struggling with her decision to come home when the phone suddenly rang. She glanced up at the clock. It was a little after 9:00 p.m. It rang again and she thought about letting it go to voice mail, but whoever it was, she’d eventually have to return the call so she picked up.
“Hello.”
“Hello, Poppy, this is Justin. I apologize for calling so late, but I just got back into the city.”
Her first instinct was to hang up. Instead, she froze.
“Poppy? Are you still there?”
“Yes, I’m here.”
“Do you have a moment? I wanted to touch base with you before your father’s funeral because I’m afraid the next few days are going to be a little hairy here. It appears we might have found a kidney donor for Callie.”
Poppy frowned. Why was she getting this blow-by-blow review? She didn’t care what he did as long as he left her alone. Still she couldn’t be so unfeeling that she’d wish ill will on a sick child.
“That’s good news.”
“Yes, but not why I’m calling. Is there anything I can do for you?”
She flinched. “I think you’ve done enough. I hope your daughter’s surgery goes well. Thank you for calling.”
It hurt to hear the chill in her voice, but was no more than he’d expected.
“Wait, please!” When he didn’t hear a dial tone, he kept talking. “I know you want nothing to do with me. I understand that. But I need for you to understand something. After I told Callie what her grandmother had done, she cried herself to sleep. When she woke up, you were the first person she asked about. She asked me if you were going to hate us, then in the same sentence, was happy you were her sister.”
“I’m nothing to her. I’m nothing to any of you,” Poppy snapped. “You don’t need to call. You don’t need to check on me.”
“I’m not doing this because I think I need to. I’m doing it because I want to, Poppy. Just because you don’t want me, doesn’t mean I don’t want you. I can’t help how I feel. I want to make things good for you. I would give you the world if you would take it.”
Anger surged through her so fast it left her breathless.
“The world? Wow! I knew the Caulfield family was wealthy, but I didn’t know you owned it all. You keep your world, I’ll keep mine. If you have issues with Coal Town, then that’s your problem. We didn’t create the divide, the city of Caulfield did. My family provided just fine for me. My home is free and clear. I have a job and a car. You’re already paying to bury my father, but considering your mother was the one who killed him, I no longer have an issue with that.”
She slammed down the phone just as John came out of the kitchen.
“Who was that on the phone?” he asked.
“Nobody,” Poppy said. “What songs do you want sung at the funeral?”
John grabbed a handful of peanuts from a dish on the table and popped them in his mouth. “Dad liked Swing Low, Sweet Chariot a lot. He used to sing it in the car, remember?”
Poppy was still so pissed she couldn’t remember anything but the sound of Justin’s voice, but she wrote it down.
“One more,” she said. “Pastor Harvard wants two.”
“Old Rugged Cross.”
“That’s that,” Poppy said, then shoved her notebook across the sofa. “This is as far as I got with the Eulogy. Can you fill in the blanks? You had Daddy eight years longer than I did.”
“I remember,” John said. “I also remember how happy I was when he and Mom got married. There were kids in my class who didn’t have a father, but I was the only one who didn’t have a mother. She filled a great big hole in my life.”
Poppy got up. She needed to move or she was going to explode.
“I’m going to make some hot chocolate. Want some?”
John grinned. “Yeah, sure!”
She left him working on the Eulogy and banged a few pans until her mood began to shift. It had occurred to her that the longer she stayed ang
ry, the more power she was giving to Justin. Little by little she let go until she was in a hot chocolate frame of mind.
****
The click in Justin’s ear was as distinct as Poppy’s disapproval.
The woman had spoken.
He sighed, silently coming to terms with momentary defeat and sat for a moment, staring into space.
Outside, the wind was up, but the massive walls of the Caulfield mansion were a bulwark against any fit Mother Nature chose to pitch. As he sat, a log in the fireplace suddenly burned in two, sending a shower of sparks up the chimney as it fell against the firewall.
The phone call had been enlightening. There was no more wondering how she felt. Now he knew. Yes, she hated his guts. But he’d found out something else. She didn’t mince words, which was a trait he admired. And there was something she had yet to learn about him. Justin Caulfield didn’t quit on anything, most certainly not his own child. He’d already missed the first 20 years of her life and had no intention of missing the rest.
****
The sun rose on a cold day in Caulfield as Poppy stood at the windows watching the sky turn from blushing pink to a pale, blue-white. She was nursing her first cup of coffee and waiting for the rest of the house to heat up before she got in the shower.
From where she was standing, she could see the top three floors of the Caulfield Building on the other side of the river. She was still fuming from last night’s phone call, although she regretted showing any anger toward Justin’s daughter. She and Callie were the true victims in all this chaos. They were the ones suffering, when in truth, all they’d done was be born.
John was still asleep and she was being as quiet as she could so as not to disturb him. She was beginning to think she might like the house to herself first thing in the morning. It was the calm before the storm. Outside, Coal Town was waking up as well.
Chimneys sent smoke signals into the sharp morning air as a warning of the day that lay ahead. School kids from Coal Town who were walking to the bus stops were wearing last year’s winter coats, most of which were either too small because they’d outgrown them, or too big because they were wearing hand-me-downs. Dogs were curled up on the leeward side of the houses – the tips of their fur icy white from an early morning frost. They slept with their noses tucked beneath their legs. Poppy wondered if they dreamed of warmer days and fuller bellies.
Today was Jessup Sadler’s day. His obituary and notice of funeral services were in the morning paper. She was beginning to think that Pastor Louis J. Harvard was enjoying the drama of the double funerals a little too much. He’d even asked her what she thought about slipping in a little ‘come to God call’ in the middle of her daddy’s service. She’d told him since it was her daddy’s funeral and not a revival, she didn’t think it was the proper time to ask mourners to commit their lives to Jesus.
He’d looked a bit taken aback, and then quickly agreed. Personally, Poppy was just ready for all the drama in her life to be over so she could grieve in her own way, not with the world watching from the pews behind her.
When she heard the washing machine stop spinning, she abandoned her post at the windows to throw the clothes into the dryer. Since Johnny was leaving after Daddy’s funeral, she wanted the clothes to be clean when he packed them back up.
****
Justin had been up since before sunrise. He felt like he was out of uniform as he went down to breakfast in slacks and a sweater rather than the two-piece suits he usually wore.
His footsteps actually echoed as he headed for the second-floor landing, and when he started down the stairs, the echoes followed. The original mansion had been built for the generations that would follow. It had been meant for large families and great parties, but for the past two generations, had seen neither.
Either the Caulfield seed had run its course, or the women the men had chosen were not the breeders they once had been. And for Justin, after the revelations of the past week, it no longer felt like a home. Maybe it was time to think about a new home - a place for starting over. It was something on his mind as he walked into the kitchen. The fact that he’d entered Lillian’s domain without warning sent her into a fuss.
“Mr. Justin! I didn’t know you were up. If you’ll tell me what you’d like for your breakfast, I’ll fix it and bring it right to you.”
Justin shoved his hands in his pockets as he looked around the room – at the industrial-style appliances in shiny stainless steel – then at the worn down edges of the old wooden trestle table where the hired help ate.
“How about a couple of sausage links, two eggs over easy and some toast?”
“Yes sir. I’ll bring it right out, and your coffee, too.”
He thought about being alone in the formal dining room, and eyed that table again. It was warm and cozy in here and Lillian was a familiar face.
“Would you be offended if I sat at your table, instead?”
Her eyes widened. Never in the entire tenure of the twenty-something years she’d worked in this house had a member of the family sat down with the help, never mind shared a meal with them.
“No sir, it’s your house. You can sit anywhere you please.”
Justin smiled. “That’s not what I asked. I asked if you would be offended. I promise I chew with my mouth closed.”
Lillian blinked and then giggled, then blinked again, as if that shouldn’t have happened. But he was still waiting for an answer, so she gave him one.
“I would be honored. Have a seat where you please. I’ll start the sausage.”
Justin hesitated a moment, then went to the counter and poured himself a cup of coffee.
****
Wade Tiller hadn’t had a sleepless night in years – at least not since he and his wife had parted company. But he couldn’t get his mind off the past. It had been a shock to learn Deborah was dead, but not nearly as big a shock as finding out they’d had a child together. His children were his life. Everything he did, he did in hopes of making a better future for them than the one that he’d had. To learn he had a daughter who was in a battle for her life had put him on his knees. He’d prayed more last night than he’d prayed in years. By the time the sun was up, he and his sons were on their way to Caulfield.
They’d started out in their usual boisterous manner, talking, teasing, and eating snacks non-stop, but the closer they got to their destination, the quieter the car became. The reality of the trip had begun to weigh upon them and Wade could see it in their faces.
“Boys, I want you to be honest with me. If any of you want to back out on getting tested, it’s okay. No one will be mad at you and no one would blame you. It’s a big thing to be asked to give away a part of your own body and it shouldn’t be done lightly. You’re all young. You might suffer an accident or illness as you grow older that causes damage to a kidney, but if you only have one to begin with, then it becomes a far bigger deal.”
“Let it go, Dad,” Hank said. “We all know the score. We talked about it last night after you went to bed.”
“He’s right,” Ben said. “I kept thinking, what if it was me needing the kidney and I knew that any one of five people could save my life and they wouldn’t do it. I can’t imagine how scared the kid is, but when I was fourteen, the thought of dying never entered my head and she’s been facing it for months.”
Paul was the one who was most certain of his path in life. He wanted to be a priest, and everything he’d done since he was twelve was aimed at the pursuit of that life.
“We don’t know her yet, but God knows her and he sent Justin Caulfield to find us. So as far as I’m concerned, it’s a done deal,” Paul said.
Wade glanced in the rearview mirror. His youngest son was staring out the window and had yet to comment.
“So, Tommy, how do you feel about it?”
Tommy didn’t answer.
Paul rolled his eyes and yanked the ear buds out of his brother’s ears.
“Tommy! Dad’s talking to you.”
>
“Hunh? What? What did you say, Dad?”
Everyone laughed. When the teasing had settled down, Wade asked him again.
“I wanted to know if you were having second thoughts about getting tested. You don’t have to, you know.”
Tommy frowned, as if he’d just been insulted. “No, I’m not having second thoughts. She doesn’t know it yet, but she’s part of this family. Someone’s gotta toss her a lifeline, right?”
Wade’s heart was so full all he could do was nod.
“Yeah, Son, that’s a good one. I like that. A lifeline. That’s what we are, her lifeline.”
****
Justin got off the elevator and started down the hall toward Callie’s room. He was scared out of his mind to tell her yet another shocking truth, and the only thing that kept him putting one foot in front of the other was remembering the look on Wade Tiller’s face when he’d announced there were no secrets in their family. When he reached the nurses’ station, he paused.
“Good morning, Victoria.”
The head nurse looked up and smiled. “Good morning, Mr. Caulfield.”
“I have a favor to ask. I need to have a private conversation with Callie and wonder if there’s anything pending regarding her care before I start.”
“I don’t think so.” She picked up Callie’s chart, scanning it quickly to see if there were any new doctor’s orders. “Nothing is scheduled other than meds during the regular rounds, which won’t be for another hour or so.”
“Then could you see that we’re not disturbed for a while? I hate to ask, but it’s going to upset her and I need all the time with her I can get.”
