If he shouldn’t involve himself in private affairs, why did he tell Elise about them? I should say something, but I don’t want to argue with him, not when he already seems mad at me. Instead I huff, “He said he wanted time alone.”
“He’s had that. Now, he needs someone to show him that they care.” Rowan isn’t as angry as Elise was, but I still feel like I’ve been scolded.
“I’ll go up and see him,” I murmur, and move to stand.
Then he shocks me by saying, “I think you should bring Mr. Peyton when you go.”
“Hasn’t Peyton visited Asher?” I ask.
“No, I haven’t seen Mr. Peyton in days,” Rowan replies.
I bite my lip as I think about what caused the chasm in the relationship. He’s been the first adult I’ve spoken to since I found out. “Do you know what they’re saying about us?”
He chuckles. “That the three of you are in a relationship?”
I groan, and look away, still uncomfortable with the idea that people know, and that he is the one who told Elise.
“It was obvious at the beach house that the three of you cared about each other. It wasn’t a surprise to me. And anyway, what does it matter? Live your life, the way you want to. You have no one to answer to but yourself.”
“But I have a daughter,” I grumble.
“And how does she feel about it?” he questions.
“She said she misses them, but…”
“Elise could see how happy the three of you are together. Love is precious, Charlie. Take care of it.”
“I don’t even know where Peyton lives,” I argue.
Rowan pulls a card out of his inside jacket pocket and hands it to me. There’s an address on it. I should have known he’d be prepared.
“And Elise?” I ask.
“Anna will be here in ten minutes to begin lunch, on my suggestion. We will take care of Elise until you return.”
I sigh, and stare down at the card. I assume he must have written our names on the envelope when Asher invited us to the beach. I guess Rowan has known since then. “Well, I guess you have everything figured out, don’t you?”
“I came prepared, yes,” he replies with a grin. “Now go get dressed. Don’t waste time.”
I immediately jump up and run toward my room.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
I navigate around the boxes littering the floor as I walk toward the door. When I began packing, I assumed that I would be moving into my new apartment, across the hallway from Charlie. I wasn’t sure how I felt about it at first, but I grew to love it, just like I grew to love Charlie and Elise. I’ve never felt more accepted, or more wanted, than I did while I lived in that apartment.
Of course, I should have known it wouldn’t last long. I should have known that something would happen and we’d split up. I’ve know that I wouldn’t find true happiness since college, since James. He warned me then that I was expecting too much, that I had my goals set too high. He said I’d never find real love with a man. I know he said it just to hurt me, but it always stuck around in the back of my mind. And he was right, I guess. I found it with a man and a woman. Or so I thought.
I hear the knock on the door again, and I’m a little hesitant. I’m fairly sure it isn’t Asher. He is the passive one, the introverted one. It must be Charlie. And I don’t want to talk to her. I’m a little ashamed that I set myself up to get my heart broken again. I’m chagrined at the idea that I trusted, that I assumed that Charlie felt the same way Asher and I did.
I look through the peephole, and see that it is indeed her. She looks adorable, in a cute floral jumper and sandals. I step back silently, without opening the door. I don’t want to talk to her. I’m not ready. I’m almost afraid of her. She had the power to bring the three of us together, and instead she pulled it all apart. I thought I was the one in control. Oh, how wrong I was.
“I know you’re there. I can see yer shadow under the door, Peyton,” she calls out, loud enough that I can hear her.
Damn it. Why can’t she just leave me alone? I lean my head against the door and reply, “I don’t want to talk to you.”
“Tough!” she replies. “I’ll stand out here knocking all darn day!” She pulls her hand back, as if to do what she threatened.
“Alright,” I say, and relent. My hands are shaking as I reach for the knob. Why does she have me so nervous?
I stand back and swing the door open. She enters, and my gaze takes all of her in. She looks stunning, even if she seems a little thinner. I close the door and watch her walk around boxes. Her ass really is perfect. She dressed to look good for me, to entice me, and I can’t help but smile at the thought that she wants me to desire her.
Maybe it shouldn’t be the first thing I ask, but I can’t stop myself. “How’s Asher?”
She crosses her arms in front of her chest, protectively. Then she chews at her bottom lip, and looks away. She’s nervous. But all I can think of while she’s doing that is kissing her until she’s breathless. God, I’ve missed her, almost as much as I’ve missed Asher.
No, I take it back. I’ve missed her just as much as I miss Asher.
“I don’t know. He told me he needs time,” she mutters, without looking at me.
I remember the argument on the jet, and how I tried to pull him out of the sadness he fell into afterward. It didn’t work, though, until I tricked her into visiting him. Is that what she’s here to do? Did she come to convince me to see him? I guess it would only be fair.
“Are you moving back to your apartment?” she asks, hopefully.
“No.” She frowns when I say it. “I’m thinking of going back to Boise.”
“What!?” she exclaims, and turns to stare into my eyes. “What do you mean, Boise?”
“I’m going home.” I’ve thought about it quite a bit. I could head back home, see the family, and take some time to regroup and plan for the future. But staring at her right now, so close I can smell her sweet perfume, I realize I don’t want any future that doesn’t have her and Asher in it.
“Your home is here, Peyton. You know that don’t ya?” She sounds so emphatic, so sure of her words.
I don’t answer her. I don’t know that. I thought I did, but I can’t be sure. I don’t know that I can trust her now. What happens the next time someone decides to talk about our relationship in a way that she doesn’t like? Will she take it out on me and Asher? Will she intentionally lash out at those she loves if someone else hurts her again?
Does she love me, or does she only tolerate me because of Asher’s feelings?
“Elise misses you.”
That stuns me. I really didn’t think Elise cared that much about me, even though I’d grown very fond of her.
“I miss you.” Her voice is full of sadness, and loss, and hope. Her eyes are red, probably from crying. She’s tugging at my heart, and reminding me of the feelings that we share. “I’m so sorry I was mean to you. You were right, I lashed out at ya. I push people away. I don’t know how to have an argument with someone I love, because I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you and Asher. It scares me sometimes.”
“I know. It scares me too, girl.” I feel my heart soften. She has a way of making me feel for her, with her softness, her openness, and her vulnerabilities. She is the exact opposite of Asher, and that might be why I need both of them.
A little sob escapes her lips, and I make my way to her. There’s no reason to hold back now. She needs me, and I need her more than I ever thought possible. She opens her arms to me, and I wrap her up into my body. I kiss the top of her head, and hold her even closer.
“Do you really love me?” I whisper. I feel like the insecure college student again, unlovable and unwanted, in need of reassurance.
She moves away from me, and tips her head back so she can look into my eyes. “Yes, Peyton, I really love you. I think I started to fall for ya on our first date. I was a little worried because I had already fallen for Asher, and I felt terrible because
I liked spending time with you too. I almost felt like I was cheating on him with you, even though I knew he didn’t feel the same way I did.”
I chuckle at that. “Oh, he fell hard for you, girl. If I’d had to listen to one more story about when he hired you, or had to hear him talk about how good you looked in your blue blouse one more time, I would have lost my mind. I was so jealous of you.” She looks shocked. It’s sweet that she’s not conceited at all, even with her pretty face and her killer body. She has two men wrapped around her finger, and she doesn’t even realize the power she possesses.
“I don’t want ya to be jealous ever again. I want ya to be ours.” She says it so sweetly I feel myself falling all over again. “I promise I’ll try to be better. I promise that if something happens, I’ll try to talk about it, and not yell.”
“I might get a little jealous, when you and Asher get married. But I promise that I will try to get over it.”
She looks stunned again, but I have no idea why. “He hasn’t even asked me.”
“I know it will happen. It’s inevitable.”
“If ya don’t want us to, we won’t. We don’t have to…”
I interrupt her. “Yes, you do have to. Elise needs a father, a legal father, and so will your future children.” She smiles at me, a huge smile that I assume is because she is happy that I agree to the marriage. But there’s something else twinkling in her eyes that makes me questions it. “What?”
“Elise wants you to be her dads. Plural. Two. You and Asher both.” The smile tugs at her lips. I know she’s playing on what I said to her a few nights ago, but the joy she feels at saying it is obvious on her pretty face.
“I don’t know…” I’ve never thought of being a dad. I’m not the dad type. Yes, gay men are having families now, but that’s just not me. I like my life the way it is. I like my convertible, marble floors, and spending time at the gym.
“Oh, come on, Peyton. Do you really think Asher is going to teach our son how to throw a football?” she teases.
I roll my eyes at that thought. “No!”
“We need you, Peyton. I need you. Say yes,” she murmurs, and bats her eyelashes.
“Yes to what?” I ask, hesitantly. I’m afraid I’ll say yes to anything she asks.
“Say yes to all of it.” She gives me a big, bright smile, which melts my insides. “But first, say yes to moving back in to yer apartment, and joining me while I apologize to Asher.”
I return her smile. “Yes, ma’am. It will be my pleasure.”
She wraps her arms around my waist and holds me tighter, her cheek against my chest. I’m sure this is where I belong. She’s right. She and Asher are my home.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
I hear footsteps headed down the hallway. It must be both of them. They aren’t trying to be quiet. Charlie is giggling, and Peyton is trying to shush her. I pull on my trousers and walk toward the door, just as they enter. Charlie’s eyes grow wide when she sees me, shirtless with my hair still slightly damp. She’s looking at me like she’s never seen a man before, and she’s holding hands with the hottest guy I’ve ever seen. I love the way she makes me feel attractive, wanted, and desired.
“I forget sometimes just how damn hot ya are, Asher,” she says, without a hint of shyness.
“Thank you.” I try to remain aloof. Although I see they’ve made up, and seem to be happy together, I need a little more. They’re holding hands, and that’s enough to annoy me a little. I need to get used to them touching, and not get so jealous over it. I don’t know if that will ever happen.
“Asher, I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have melted down the way I did. I’ve apologized to Peyton, and talked him into moving back in.” She says it in all seriousness, but it sounds rehearsed and insincere.
I glance from her to Peyton, and he gives me a weak smile. “You hurt me, Charlotte, and you hurt Peyton also.” She frowns at me, and begins to speak. I interrupt her sharply. “But worse than that, you intended to hurt us.”
“I’m sorry.” She couldn’t excuse her actions, even if she tried.
Although I have already forgiven her, as has Peyton apparently, I need her to realize the effects her actions have on others. If I don’t emphasize how badly she hurt me, she might just do it again because she can.
“Charlie, I love you to the point of distraction. Peyton and I are both crazy about you. I want you to be aware of that, and the fact that we have grown very attached to you. Even threatening that you might leave us can cause a panic.” Peyton exhales loudly. He’s frowning at me, with his perfectly groomed eyebrows furrowed together. “I’m speaking for myself, of course. I wouldn’t suggest that Peyton would panic over the idea of losing you like I did.” He sighs loudly. I guess that addendum didn’t help.
“Asher, I truly am sorry. I reacted badly to the idea that Elise would be hurt. And when she figured it out on her own, she didn’t even care. We’ll have the summer break to let the gossip die down. If the kids are rude to her at school next year, we’ll look at homeschooling with a tutor or something. I really am sorry that I didn’t take your feelings into account as much as I did Elise’s, but my first thought will always be for her. You must know that. Can ya forgive me?”
She does look truly regretful. She also looks beautiful, with her hair hanging long and thick down her back. And the outfit she chose to wear is lovely, the blue of the short set bringing out the color in her eyes. It has a deep V neckline, even deeper than the black dress I like. It has taken the last of my self control to restrain my reactions to her. She bites at her bottom lip, possibly worried that I won’t forgive her.
“I love you, Charlie. Of course I forgive you. But please, be mindful of what you say in the future.” I glance from her cleavage to Peyton, and he nods sharply as if to tell me enough.
She looks sad, lowering her head and pouting out her bottom lip.
“I have something for you. I ordered it to be custom made for you after our first encounter together. It arrived yesterday. I have gazed at it several times, wondering if we would be together again so that I could give it to you.” Peyton clears his throat at those words, loudly. I assume I have gone overboard. I walk toward my bed, and grab the black velvet box that sits atop the bedside table. “I hope you like it.” I extend the box toward her.
It is the first gift of jewelry that I’ve bought for her, that I’ve bought for any woman really. I hope that she will love it, the way I did when I saw the image on the internet.
She takes the box and opens it, and gasps when she see it. “Asher, it’s…” Her beautiful blue eyes grow wide, as she stares up at me through her thick eyelashes. “It’s perfect.” She pulls the platinum necklace and pendant out of the box, places it in her palm, and gazes at it almost lovingly. “It’s amazing. I love it.” Her fingers trace over the intricate, delicate design, and stop at the bright blue stone in the center.
“It’s a Celtic love knot, with a heart. I thought that the three points might represent the three of us, and the heart indicates our love for each other. Sapphires represent love and loyalty. And it reminded me of your eyes.”
She places it around her neck, and touches it once more. “Thank you,” she whispers, and throws herself into my arms. I reach down for her waist and pull her against my body. “I’ve missed you, Asher. You have no idea how much.”
I carry her a few steps toward the bed, and fall onto it with her on top of me. She giggles, and snuggles against me. In about a second Peyton is joining us, on my right side.
“You might have missed me half as much as I’ve missed you,” I say, as I rub her hair with my left hand, and take Peyton’s hand in my right. “Don’t ever break my heart like that again. I don’t want to go through that ever again. Please.”
She sighs against my skin, and begins to rub her fingertips lightly over my bare chest. I am so in love with her, and she doesn’t even realize it. She doesn’t understand that she has my heart in her hand, and even though she could so easily b
reak it, I would die before I took it back.
“I think we’ve missed lunch, and I’m starving,” she murmurs, but doesn’t move. “Anna is downstairs in my apartment with Elise, and she made food.”
“Umhmmm,” Peyton mutters, as he leans forward and begins kissing her shoulder.
She inhales, and shivers almost violently. “I like that,” she whispers, and turns to look at him. When she does, her lips encounter my nipple, and it’s my turn to react. Then Peyton does something wicked, and kisses her, right against the tight pink bud. I might melt into the bed. I might evaporate into nothing.
“I’ve missed us,” Peyton says, before his tongue escapes and caresses my nipple, and Charlie’s lips. My hips flex, pushing off the bed and against Charlie’s softness. I want to be inside her, but I can wait.
She glances up at me and smiles. She must feel my erection, because her hands move down her body and mine, and find the button of my trousers.
“Charlie,” I sigh. She merely gives me a teasing smile, and moves up onto her knees. “I love you, both of you.” I get it out right before she frees my throbbing manhood, and I can’t think or speak.
This is where I want to be for the rest of my life. This is my home.
*****
We’re all four taking our seats around Charlie’s dinner table. Elise is smiling, showing off a tooth that is finally peeking through her gums. “I missed you,” she states, as she stares at me. I knew that I would love Charlie’s daughter like my own, but I didn’t realize exactly how good it would feel to know that she cares about me as well.
“I missed you too, Elise,” I say, as I watch her mother fix a plate for her, with salad and the casserole that Anna prepared.
“Mommy’s necklace is pretty,” she says, as her eyes move from me to her mother.
I clear my throat, and smile. “Yes, it is,” I agree. I don’t explain what the necklace represents, for fear of offending Charlie.
Room For Three Page 20
