“I don’t know.”
“I do. That’s all that matters.”
I shake my head at how quickly Toni and I are bonding. She’s the goofy best friend I’ve never had. I just have to make sure befriending her isn’t the hugest mistake Toni’s ever made.
“Hubba hubba,” Toni says from behind where I stand looking in a mirror in Toni’s bedroom. “If I weren’t as straight as an arrow, I’d go out with you. Say, you don’t happen to have any gorgeous male cousins lurking about, do you?”
I barely keep myself from jerking. I do in fact have several gorgeous male cousins, but I don’t want them anywhere near Toni. “No, sorry.”
Toni shrugs. “Worth a try.” She turns away to pull on her chunky, black, lace-up shoes that somehow go well with her flared jeans covered in pink paint splashes that match the streaks in her hair. When she disappears into her closet, I return my attention to my own reflection.
Toni and Paige convinced me to buy a killer pair of low-rider jeans covered with several painted flowers centered with bronze sequins. I turn sideways to admire them and the sleeveless bronze top, the great sandals and the large hoops filled with copper and bronze beads hanging from my ears. I’m going to freeze, but I’ll look good doing it.
When Toni emerges from the closet, she’s changed into a different shirt, a black tee with hot pink writing that says, “Hostile 17 stole my kittens!”
I raise an eyebrow.
“What? Just because the band can’t be called Hostile 17 doesn’t mean I don’t get my point across whenever I can.”
“Help me.”
We both turn to see Paige standing in the doorway, looking so forlorn my heart leaps in worry. “What’s wrong?”
Paige enters the room and proceeds to flop onto her back on the bed. “I need you two to make me gorgeous, make me stand out.”
“This is about Eric, isn’t it?” I ask.
Paige looks up. “See, it’s even obvious to you, and I’ve known you less than a week. Why are men so oblivious?”
“Part of their inferior brain function,” Toni responds in a sage, matter-of-fact way.
“Well, I’m tired of waiting for him to notice, damn it. Either he notices me tonight or I’m through.”
“Try flirting with someone else,” Toni suggests.
“You know me, I don’t flirt. No, instead I pined away for Eric since sixth grade.”
I sit beside Paige. “You’ve liked him that long?”
“Pathetic, isn’t it?”
“On his part for not noticing.”
Paige turns her head to look at me. “I have to admit, when I first saw you and how Eric looked at you, I was prepared to hate you. But I can’t. You’re too likeable.”
I smile. “Thanks. I think that’s the nicest thing anybody’s ever said to me.”
“Okay, so we have our mission,” Toni says with a clap of her hands. “Operation Make Paige Irresistible.”
We spend the next half-hour choosing clothes, applying makeup, selecting jewelry and transforming Paige’s deep russet hair with generous amounts of styling products. By the time we finish, Paige is a smokin’ vision in a white, off-the-shoulder blouse, jeans that hug her shape in all the right places and giant silver hoops dangling from her earlobes.
“Holy tamales, you’re hot,” Toni says.
“Really?” Paige is looking in the mirror as if she isn’t sure it’s her staring back.
“I second the hotness,” I say, absolutely loving this gal-pal time. “And if Eric doesn’t notice, I will personally toss him off the nearest mountaintop for you.”
Paige spins and hugs us both at the same time. “You guys are awesome.” When she pulls back, she eyes Toni. “I just wish you had a date.”
“She might if she tried.”
We all turn at the sound of Mrs. Dawes’s voice.
“Don’t start, Mom.”
“But, honey, you’re a beautiful girl if you’d just let yourself be. I mean, wear something feminine, make yourself attractive like Jax here.”
Something snaps inside me. Mrs. Dawes’s tone is too much like my Aunt Silda’s. “Don’t do that.”
Mrs. Dawes turns a surprised expression toward me and my tone. “Don’t what?”
“Don’t compare Toni to me. She’s beautiful just the way she is.” Sometimes being what others consider flawlessly beautiful is a type of curse, but it comes with being a post-Salem witch. With great power came great beauty, for all the witch families who have survived into the present.
“It’s okay, Jax,” Toni says, resigned. “I’m used to it.”
Mrs. Dawes doesn’t say anything else, but her look says she and Toni will be continuing this discussion later. “Well, I’ll leave you girls alone. Have a good time tonight, but don’t be out too late.”
“We won’t,” Paige says in a small voice, a little more scared of Mrs. Dawes than either Toni or I.
When her mom reaches the bottom of the stairs, Toni turns and slowly walks toward the window.
“I’m sorry,” I say.
Toni shrugs. “Don’t worry about it. You’re not the first person Mom’s compared me to and found me lacking.”
“But that’s not fair.” Paige sinks onto the end of the bed.
“Hey, life’s not fair,” Toni replies. “It’s not fair my dad died and made Mom overprotective. It’s not fair she can’t accept me for who I am. But, hey, I’m pretty lucky all things considered.”
She doesn’t sound like she feels lucky, and I can’t blame her. I know something about family expectations and not living up to them.
“Does she think being in a band is a bad influence or something?” I ask.
Toni turns toward me. “You could say that. You see, Jane Austen didn’t have pink streaks in her hair and didn’t play drums. And I’m supposed to be the next Jane Austen or Willa Cather or somebody literary and famous. You know what Toni is short for? Antonia, as in My Antonia. And my younger sisters’ names? Charlotte and Emily, as in Brontë.” She shakes her head. “I could talk until my tongue falls out and she’d never understand that I just want to be in a band. I don’t want to go to college and be an English major.”
“Maybe you could do both?” I ease out the question so I don’t appear to be taking Toni’s mom’s side. “Maybe not major in English but music.”
Toni starts shoving money and her ID into her jean pockets. “Maybe, but it feels like giving in. And I hate giving in to pressure.” She looks up at the sound of an engine outside. “The guys are here.” She spins back toward us, a big Toni smile plastered on her face, one that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “Let’s go rock The Barn.”
We hurry down the stairs and out the front door before Mrs. Dawes can say anything else that might dampen the fun of the evening. And I’m in the mood for some fun. I can be careful and still have a good time. This new life might not last long, so I’m determined to enjoy it while it does.
My nerves spark and jump around inside me like thousands of firecrackers. Before this night is over, I may be in Keller’s arms dancing. At the moment, I can’t think of anything I want more.
Keller and Eric stand next to Keller’s truck.
“Good evening, lovely ladies,” Eric says as he bows in courtly fashion. He’s about to say something else when he comes out of the bow to find himself face to face with Paige.
“Paige?”
“Yes.”
I feel her anxiety from five feet away and hope Eric doesn’t crush her. I’ll be forced to make good on the tossing him off a mountaintop threat.
“Wow, you look . . . great.” He gives her a lopsided smile, and Paige looks like she might melt in response.
When I shift my attention to Keller and see him staring at me with totally unmasked appreciation, I understand how Paige feels.
“Come on, people,” Toni says as she climbs into the truck. “Let’s cut the googly eyes and hit the road before my mother decides you all are a bad influence and locks me in my room
.”
Keller smiles at me. “You look nice.”
There will be enough nervous energy riding in the Tundra tonight to fuel a nuclear reactor.
As soon as Keller pulls away from the curb, his cell rings. When he glances at the caller ID, he sighs, looks like he might not answer, then hits the Send button.
“Hey, Dad.”
My blood chills at the thought of even Rev. Dawes’ voice being that close to me. I listen but can’t make out the words on the other end of the call.
“Now’s not a good time. I’m driving.” Keller pauses while his dad says something else. I notice his hand squeeze the steering wheel harder. “I’ll do it later.”
Do what later? Go hunting? Or get rid of me? Am I unknowingly riding into a trap? Have I misjudged my new friends? Could they all be in this together?
Stop it.
I manage to rein in my paranoia. Rev. Dawes probably just wanted Keller to patrol or take out some troublesome spirit. After all, the covens have been very good at concealing their true natures for hundreds of years. Despite my slips, I’ve done nothing that would suddenly allow Keller and his father to figure out the entirety of my real identity.
I resist the urge to ask if everything is okay. It’s not like he’s going to tell me the truth anyway. I’m not supposed to know what he is or how he usually spends his evenings, am I?
But the quiet that has settled in the truck, particularly the front, keeps me tense as Keller maneuvers the truck through the night. I only relax, and then just a little, when we reach our destination.
I hear the thump of the music as soon as Keller switches off the truck engine outside The Barn. Already, I’m imagining being inside, trying to dance away the anxiety gripping me, an anxiety that is ruining what could be construed as a first date.
Toni slides out of the truck and jogs toward a van where three guys are unloading band equipment. “Later, lovebirds.”
Her words sound forced, making me wonder if it’s because of the post-call tenseness or possibly that she’s not as okay with being the flying-solo member of the group as she would like us to believe. I hope Mrs. Dawes’s words aren’t eating away at Toni. My friend is beautiful, inside and out, just not in the Barbie sort of way.
“You ready?” Keller asks from beside me, sounding distant, like he’s still wrapped in the disagreement with his father.
With a final glance at Toni, I nod. “Yeah.”
He catches my gaze, holds it. I watch as a new emotion filters into his eyes, one I can only call determination. Maybe a touch of . . . rebellion. He slips his fingers through mine. His palm feels warm, alive, and so right I can’t describe it.
The volume of the music increases tremendously as we enter The Barn. Inside, it looks as if every student from the high school is there and then some. People are dancing to the DJ music, drinking and eating at little tables lining the walls, and filling what once was a hayloft. Toni and the rest of her band are setting up on the stage at the far end of the building.
Keller leans close to my ear. “What do you think?”
“I love it.” And I do. I enjoyed going to clubs in Miami, riding in on my fake I.D. and the bouncers’ inability to throw my companions or me out. Witch compulsion at work. At least I’d enjoyed the dancing. What came afterward . . . no, that was all in the past.
I want to have fun, but at no one else’s expense. Tonight I won’t be forced to end the evening by controlling someone’s mind for practice, making him steal or say something hurtful to someone he cares about. I shake off the memories, grateful I got away before I had to do something truly vile.
Already, Eric has directed Paige to the dance floor.
“Paige and Eric, who would have thought?” Keller says.
“You didn’t know she liked him?”
Keller shakes his head.
I laugh. “Guys, you really are the clueless wonders of the world.”
High on my new freedom and the heart-pounding bass in the song playing, I pull Keller toward the dance floor. I leave all worries about my family and his dad firmly on the edge of the room and start to dance, smiling at Keller until he joins in. From above, the dance floor must resemble a vibrating mass of teenage humanity, and I can’t picture a better place to be.
I let myself go and dance with abandon, intoxicated by this life of my making, by the boy dancing close enough to generate sparks. When a thumping Rob Zombie tune fades away into a slow song, Keller doesn’t move away. Instead, he takes the one step separating us and pulls me close. He never looks away from my eyes as we move together, ignoring everyone around us.
My heart beats so fast and hard that I’ve no doubt Keller feels it. Or is part of that beating his heart? I can’t tell which is which. I love the feel of his arms around me, his firm chest pressed close to mine. How is it possible to feel this good without popping like an overfilled balloon?
Too soon the song fades away, but Keller doesn’t let go. I know I will ache with longing if he tries to break contact.
“One more slow one before Nemesis takes the stage and blows the roof off The Barn!” the DJ says, earning cheers from the crowd.
The next slow song starts, and I catch sight of Eric and Paige—kissing. I laugh. “Guess they decided to start making up for lost time.”
Keller glances at his friends, then back at me. “Looks like a good idea.” He lowers his mouth to mine, and I do dissolve then.
Chapter Six
I close my eyes, lift onto my toes and wrap my arms more firmly around his neck. Never, ever in a million lifetimes would I have imagined a kiss feeling this perfect, stirring my blood until I want to do . . . things I can’t do in the middle of a dance floor. Keller must sense my urgency because he eases away. When he speaks, his breath moves against my lips.
“I can’t believe I waited so long to do that.”
“You’ve only known me a few days.”
He pulls back a bit more and looks deep into my eyes. “I wanted to kiss you the moment I saw you.”
“Me, too,” I whisper, only sharing part of what I feel. Knowing the impossibility of this lasting forever, I can’t tell him that that’s exactly what I want, that something very deep within me yearns for him. I can’t even say it to myself because it sounds so completely crazy. But there’s no denying the feeling.
We kiss again, eliciting a few whistles and catcalls from the dancers surrounding us. I wish I could will them all away so these moments could be Keller’s and mine alone. I lay my head against his chest, feel his warmth, hear his heartbeat, revel in the feeling of being so close to him. I try to convince myself that if whatever it is between us lasts no longer than tonight, it’s worth it.
When the song starts to fade away into the last chorus, I want desperately to call it back, to make it go on endlessly so I don’t have to leave Keller’s arms. I look up into his eyes and wonder if he’s thinking the same thing.
“I can’t believe you’re dancing with me,” he says, so softly I almost don’t hear it over the music.
“Why?”
“Because you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”
For the first time in my life, it makes me indescribably happy to get such a compliment. It feels like Keller is seeing more than just the physical, and that makes his words that much more special.
The song disappears at the same moment a loud guitar announces its presence on the stage. The lead singer of Nemesis, a guy I think is in my Art class, sings a few fist-pumping lines. Then the rest of the band jumps in, and the dance floor turns into an ocean of dancing bodies. Keller and I maneuver our way to the side of the room and snag a tall table in a dark corner. Keller weaves through the crowd to the bar and returns with two soft drinks and a big plate of nachos.
I move to the music and smile as Toni wails away on the drums. “She’s good.”
“Yeah, she’s been drumming since she was little. I still remember when my uncle bought her first drum set. It was this tiny thing, but sh
e loved it. Wouldn’t let me touch it though, greedy little snot.”
“How old was she?”
“Five, I think.” He looks toward the stage, and I see that despite their jabs and barbs, the cousins love each other.
“It’s cool that you two are close.” A pang for what I’ve never had, a close relationship with siblings or cousins, any family members other than my mother, makes me envy Keller and Toni.
“Yeah, guess we’ve just kind of grown up in the same boat.”
“With each of you losing a parent?”
“Yeah.”
“How old was Toni when her dad died?”
“We were about nine.”
“How’d he die?”
“In a hunting accident.” Keller stuffs an overloaded nacho in his mouth, and I get the feeling that the conversation is making him uncomfortable. Is that because of what his uncle had been hunting? Because of the phone call with his father earlier? Is he feeling guilty because he’s not out hunting right now?
I can’t exactly press for more answers without revealing how I even know supernatural beings exist. Time to change the topic.
I glance out at the dance floor and laugh. “Wow, I don’t think Eric and Paige have stopped since we got here.”
“Dancing or kissing?”
“Either.”
Despite its rocky start, the night turns out to be as close to perfect as I could ever hope for. Keller and I dance and eat and talk, getting to know each other better. We discover we’re both fans of summer popcorn movies where lots of things blow up.
“I just can’t picture it,” he says as he rubs his thumb across the top of my hand.
“Why? Because I’m a girl?”
“Yeah.”
“Have a degree in typecasting, do you?”
He holds up his hands, palms out. “Just not what I expected. But it’s cool.”
“Thank you.”
Keller points at me. “What other surprises are you hiding, Jax Taylor?”
I’m glad for the dimness where we’re sitting because I’m not sure the fear that surges up inside me isn’t reflected on my face.
White Witch Page 6
