She felt the same tingle of reaction she had the first time their eyes met. She tried to dismiss it, to blame it on the feeling of deliverance she felt. The feeling that she was no longer alone with this sick child.
But woven through it she could feel the echoes of an older emotion. One she had convinced herself she would never let herself feel again.
One that she had felt a brief surge of when he had shaken her hand at her parents’ place.
He walked to her side with an easy rolling gait as if there was no reason to hurry. Then he glanced at the nurse who was marking something on Gracie’s chart.
“So what seems to be the problem?” he asked, glancing from Rachel to Gracie, then to the nurse.
“She’s running a fever,” Rachel said.
“I just took her temperature,” the nurse said. “Slightly elevated, but nothing to be concerned about.”
Rachel blinked, puzzled, then looked from Gracie’s flushed face to Eli. “Slightly elevated? She felt so hot.”
Eli glanced at the chart, then put his hand on the toddler’s forehead. Gracie smiled up at him as if suddenly all was well in her world.
“Are you still giving her the antibiotics?”
“She has a couple of days to go.”
“Well, they seem to be working. But just to be on the safe side, I’ll check her more thoroughly.”
Rachel hadn’t noticed earlier how soothing his voice could be.
“How are you managing with her?” he asked.
“Well, it’s only been a day and I’m already here, so that hardly says much for my capabilities,” Rachel said. Gracie whimpered and reached out. Again she could not understand why the child seemed so attached to her. It was not as if Rachel had encouraged it. Gracie made her feel vulnerable. Taking care of her, even for a day, had intensified the feeling.
“You did the right thing. With kids like Gracie things can turn around quite quickly, either way,” he said with a lazy smile that created a faint quiver in her midsection. She looked away.
“Did you take her temperature yourself before you came here?” Eli asked, looking in Gracie’s ears, his fingers gently probing her neck.
“The lady at the day care center recommended I bring her in.”
Eli listened to Gracie’s heart, then put the stethoscope away. “You brought her to a day-care center? I thought you were taking care of her at your parents’ place?”
His voice had taken on an edge that made Rachel stiffen. “No. I have a full-time job. I can’t simply drop it to take care of Gracie.”
Eli slipped his stethoscope into the pocket of his doctor’s smock and asked the nurse beside him to leave. Then he turned to Rachel, his arms crossed over his chest. “There is no ‘simply’ about taking care of Gracie,” he said. “A day-care center is not the best alternative for her. I would advise you to find something else.”
The smile was gone, as was the warm tone of his voice. It shouldn’t annoy her, but it did.
“It’s not like I just dropped her off at the nearest one I could find,” she said, feeling defensive. “I spent the first afternoon I had her researching day-care centers, and found one that is certified to take care of children with special needs. And right now, all I need is for you to tell me what’s wrong with her.”
Eli sighed lightly but turned back to the toddler, who was reaching for Rachel, her eyes tearing up. Her lower lip glistened and she looked as if she was going to cry again. Rachel stroked her back, waiting.
“She’s fine. Yes, her temperature is slightly elevated, but that could just as easily be because she is upset. Her one ear seems a bit red, but that will go down with the antibiotics. If she starts to fuss, give her some children’s Tylenol and monitor her temperature. I’ll give you a list of things you might want to have on hand,” he said, scribbling notes on a piece of paper. He ripped the paper off the pad and held it out to her.
Rachel felt suddenly foolish, yet relieved to know that Gracie was basically okay. “Thanks for the advice,” she said, putting the paper into her purse.
“I’d like to see her day after tomorrow to make sure that we are staying on top of this infection. Is there any time that works best for you?”
Midnight, she thought. It was usually about that time that she managed to go to bed. Counting the Sunday of her mother’s accident, Rachel had had Gracie only two days, but already her life had gone from busy to barely controlled chaos.
“Why don’t you set up an appointment and I’ll work it into my schedule?” she said with a quick smile that did not seem to charm him one iota.
Not that she cared. As she had told her friends, Gracie’s attractive doctor was not her type. As if she even had time for a “type.” These days she felt as if she was juggling eight balls and if she let go of just one, all the rest would tumble to the ground. Her work was her life. If it fell, what would she have?
“Where can I reach you if I can’t get you at home?”
She provided her work number and cell phone number.
“Just leave a message with Lorna if you can’t reach me at work. And my cell phone has an answering system. You have my parents’ number. They have an answering system, too.”
Eli gave her a wry smile. “All these numbers and I still might have to leave a message?”
“It’s not difficult. I do it all the time.”
She hadn’t meant to sound so snippy, but something about him was still making her feel defensive. She picked Gracie up and the child wound her arms around Rachel’s neck. In spite of her resolve, Rachel felt herself softening. Then she glanced at the clock and the feeling hardened into frustration. She was supposed to be meeting with LaReese in half an hour and now she had supplies to buy and a child to feed instead. She would have to reschedule and hope LaReese understood.
“I have to go,” she said. “Thanks for seeing Gracie. I’ll see you in a couple of days.” And without a backward glance she left the emergency ward.
“I got a few ins on some potential nannies,” Pilar said, dropping onto Rachel’s couch holding the phone in one hand, a paper with a list of names in the other. “One of them used to be a nurse. A couple of them have some kind of medical training.”
“You are a lifesaver,” Rachel said to Pilar, slipping papers into her briefcase. “If I can get a nanny, I won’t have to worry about packing her around, as Eli so delicately put it. For now, I’m glad you could come and watch Gracie for me. Are you sure you’re going to be okay with her?”
“Hey. The doctor said she was fine, and I’m a super friend.”
“If you can find a capable nanny, you will not only be a super friend, you’ll be a lifesaver.”
“So I’m round and holey?” Pilar smiled, then leaned back in the low couch and twirled a long strand of dark hair around her finger. “But friends, even super friends, are also honest, and honestly girl, you look frazzled, which is not the capable Rachel we know and love.”
“I’m tired. Too many things on my mind,” Rachel said, sorting through the papers she needed to take to LaReese’s place. “I’m going flat out at the Foundation and LaReese is being difficult to deal with and I can’t afford not to mollycoddle her. I’ve lost a couple of donors in the past couple of weeks and one of our charities wants us to do their golf tournament.”
“Why don’t you get Lorna to do it?”
Rachel paused for a moment, considering it, then shook her head. “I can hardly dump this on her shoulders.”
“So you dump it on yours.”
“My shoulders are more experienced than hers,” Rachel said absently, riffling through the papers she had laid out.
“It wouldn’t kill you to pass a few things on, my friend the micromanager. I would love to see you have some kind of life beyond the Foundation.”
Rachel gave her a smile. “My life is the Foundation. I don’t need more.”
“Everyone needs more,” Pilar said softly. “I enjoy my job, but it isn’t everything for me. I’m still looking
for love.”
“My friend the romantic.” Rachel slipped the rest of the papers in her briefcase. “Life is a whole lot easier if you keep things, well, simple.”
“Taking care of Gracie and working six days a week is hardly simple.”
“It will be if you find me a capable nanny. Then I won’t have to cart her around so much. Eli was right about that.” Though, it hurt to admit it.
“I’m still surprised you agreed to take care of her.”
“What else could I do? Though, I have to confess she still makes me nervous.”
“Why is that?”
Rachel stopped and bit her lip. Though Pilar, Meg and Anne had known her for many years, none of them fully understood the pain that she had buried deep. She didn’t always understand it herself. She only knew that Gracie’s vulnerability, the fact that she needed Rachel, had slowly pried those feelings to the surface once again.
“Is this about Keith?” Pilar asked.
Rachel looked into her friend’s eyes and for a moment confusion slipped past her usual self-control. “It was a huge loss.”
“But that shouldn’t keep you from caring about someone again. I don’t think God meant for you to be alone the rest of your life.”
“Then why did He take Keith from me?” She heard a cry from Gracie’s room and stiffened. “And why did he make that little girl the way she is?”
Pilar sighed heavily, her arms crossed over her chest in a defensive gesture. “You are more intelligent than that, Rachel.”
Rachel held her hand up. “I’m sorry. I know all about sin and evil and that God uses everything, so don’t start with the mini-sermon.”
“You know it, you just don’t want to believe it.” Pilar touched her friend on the shoulder. “And even more than that, I think you don’t dare open your heart again because you don’t believe God uses everything for our good. Yes, there is pain in relationships, but that is all part of the chance we take when we open our hearts.”
“Well, right now I don’t have time for heart stuff. I haven’t met anyone who is my type.” She pulled out a mirror and gave her makeup and hair a quick going-over.
“Not even Eli Cavanaugh?”
Rachel tried to ignore the little rush she felt at the mention of his name.
“I think he’s very attractive,” Pilar continued. “He’s got this strong gentleness thing happening. Very appealing. And by the flush I can see creeping up your neck, I think you are thinking the same thing.”
Rachel slipped the strap of her briefcase over her shoulder and grabbed her purse, trying to ignore her friend’s teasing. “He is attractive,” she conceded, knowing that if she didn’t, Pilar would harp on her until she did. “But right now I don’t have time for anyone, appealing or not.”
“Have a good time, hon,” Pilar called out as Rachel walked to the door. “If Eli calls, I’ll tell him you said hello.”
Rachel just tossed a wave over her shoulder and left.
“We’re supposed to maintain our sanity in this noise?” Pilar handed Kelly Young the file she had been working on and glanced back over her shoulder. “I’m just thankful it’s quitting time.”
Kelly frowned as the screech of nails being yanked out of the wall in the far end of the building competed with their conversation. She brushed a hand over her streaked blonde hair, as if checking for dust. As director of Tiny Blessings Adoption Agency, she liked to maintain a professional appearance.
“I just asked Ben to pull off the damp drywall. He promised me the worst of this would be finished by the time we get back to work.”
Though the adoption agency had been fully restored some years ago, in the past few days the heating system had been giving them problems. Over the weekend one of the radiators had sprung a leak and soaked into the drywall of an older, empty room. They had been using the room for storage of odds and ends and Kelly had hoped to turn it into a proper meeting room.
She had phoned a plumber who had managed to fix the system and now Ben Cavanaugh, a local carpenter, was taking the old drywall down.
Though she had a pressing appointment in twenty minutes, the working day was almost over. Hopefully Ben would be done the worst of it before they all returned to work the next day.
“Did Ann get the criminal record check on this family?” Kelly asked, flipping through the file Pilar had just given her.
“She was waiting to get it faxed to her.”
“What do you think of this match?” Kelly asked.
“Professionally I think it’s a very good match. Personally, I think it will be fantastic.” As a social worker for Tiny Blessings Pilar was directly involved in matching prospective families to children being put up for adoption.
Pilar helped herself to a chocolate from a box that was part of a thank you basket that had been sent to Kelly from a grateful family who had adopted a child through their agency.
Kelly glanced up at Pilar and felt a flicker of envy. Somehow, in spite of eating what she wanted, Pilar managed to maintain her slim figure. With her straight black hair and black eyes, she was stunning and Kelly was surprised that she was still single.
“So I guess now all we need to do is…” Kelly stopped as Ben, the carpenter, put his head into the doorway.
“I found something you might want to have a look at,” he said to Kelly.
Frowning, Kelly got up, followed by Pilar.
They passed Ann, Kelly’s secretary on the way out. She looked up at them as they followed Ben.
“What’s going on?” she asked.
Kelly paused at Ann’s desk, laying the file on it. “I don’t know. Ben wants to show me something in the room he’s working on.”
Curious, Ann got up and followed them as well.
When they got to the room, Ben was standing by the studs he had just exposed. But instead of an orderly row of two by fours, in the middle of the wall, was what looked like a doorway and beyond that, Kelly saw a small room instead of an exterior wall.
“What is it?” Kelly asked.
“This is a false wall built later,” Ben said. “I think this is the doorway.”
Kelly walked over to the opening and caught the scent of moldering paper and damp cardboard from the room.
“Here. I’ll shed a little light on the subject,” Ben said pulling out a flashlight and shining it into the room. “Let me go in first. I want to make sure it’s okay.”
Kelly glanced over her shoulder at Pilar and Ann who looked as puzzled and as curious as she was.
“There’s a whole bunch of boxes in here,” Ben’s muffled voice called out. “But it looks to be okay.”
Kelly followed him in and stopped dead, her eyes following the beam of light that Ben shone over the contents of the room. The room was only about four feet deep. Barely large enough to hold the two of them, but alone each end were stacked boxes.
“Take one out into the other room so we can look at it better,” Kelly asked Ben, now completely baffled. What was in these boxes and why were they hidden away in a secret room like this?
Once the box was in the outer room, Ben pulled the flaps open.
It was full of files.
Pilar and Ann came closer as Kelly knelt down and pulled one out. She didn’t recognize the name written along the tab.
“Does this look familiar?” she asked Ann and Pilar.
Ann took the file from Kelly’s hand and flipped through it. Then frowned. “The names look familiar, but I’m sure we have a copy of this file in our main filing system,” she said. “I wonder why there would be a second copy.”
“Take it to your desk. We can look at it better there,” Pilar suggested.
Kelly glanced at her watch. She was going to be late. “I’d like to go over it together. It will have to wait for now.” She brushed her skirt off and smoothed her hand over her hair hoping she looked presentable. Her makeup she could check on the way.
“Here, I’ll take that,” Ben said, easily picking up the box. “Where do
you want it?”
“Put it in my office,” Kelly said. She bit her lip as she looked at the hole in the wall. “Do you mind to waiting to finish this until we can have a better look at those other boxes?” she asked Ben.
He shrugged. “I don’t mind quitting early.”
Kelly got up, a feeling of unease slipping through her. The previous director of the agency, Barnaby Harcourt, ran things his own way but was very suspicious even by Barnaby’s standards.
She looked at Pilar, Ann and Ben. “I don’t know what’s in the files, but for now, we better keep this between us. It could be nothing, but I’m guessing that those files were hidden for a reason.”
They all nodded and as they left, Kelly locked the room.
Ben brought the box to Kelly’s office just as Florence, the cleaning lady came in the front door.
She frowned and glanced at the clock on the wall, as if questioning what they were doing here so late.
Kelly shot a warning glance at Pilar, Ben and Ann. “I’m sorry Florence, but something important came up.” She took a moment to compose herself, trying to find the right way to put off Florence being around without arousing suspicion. “Ben didn’t get finished here like I had hoped he would so it’s rather pointless to have you clean up today.”
Florence shot Kelly an annoyed look. “But I get paid to do this. I can’t come for a couple of days.”
Kelly made a snap decision. “You still get paid for your time today. It’s just rather pointless to clean up when Ben is still working.”
Florence looked from Kelly to Ann to Pilar with narrowed eyes. “Okay. But I don’t like this. I had to come out special to do this job.”
Kelly bit back a frustrated sigh. One of these days she was going to find a replacement for this contrary woman. “I’m sorry, Florence. I was hoping Ben would be finished by now.”
“I’m a little slow is all,” Ben said, flashing a smile at Florence.
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