by BJ Harvey
“Gorgeous, you there?” he asks with a laugh.
“Always here for you. Hey, remember last night when I woke you up with my—”
“Makenna Lewis, you kiss my grandchildren with that mouth?” My mother scolds from the seat opposite me. I glance at her, snorting out loud at her attempt to keep a straight face. The corners of her mouth twitch as she struggles to appear stern and serious.
“Yep,” I announce proudly as I try to sit up straight and fail spectacularly, sliding off the smooth, black leather seats and landing with a thump on my ass, meeting the floor with my legs askew and my skirt around my waist, flashing the group my bright red lace thong.
“Shit,” I mutter as the women gasp in shock before roaring with laughter at my drunken misfortune.
“Mac, what did you do?” Daniel calls out desperately into my ear.
“I …” I struggle to talk as I get the giggles and can no longer control myself, legs included it seems. I brush my skirt down and pull myself back up onto the seat. “I’m so drunk I don’t care,” I say to both him and the rest of the vehicle.
“Sounds like you’re having a good time, hon. Enjoy your night, and remember the promise you made. No trouble and lots of messy drunken sex when you roll in the door later.”
My body heats up, my mind full of sexy ideas and finger vault images of Daniel’s naked body. Down girl!
“God!” I moan. “Why did you have to bring that up right now? Turn the car around, I have sexing to do!” I announce loudly.
“Gorgeous, I’ll let you go.” His voice is low now, full of need and unspoken desire. “But remember the dirty thoughts going through your head right now so you can reenact them when you’re here in front of me.”
Ladies, I’ve hit the motherfucking jackpot with this man.
“I love you. Sex you later!” I declare before pulling the phone away from my ear and fumbling with the buttons to end the call.
“Jesus, Mac! How many shots did you have at home?” Kate asks with an intoxicated grin.
“Not enough! Driver! Off to the Pink Monkey place, we go! Half naked men to perv on and more alcamahol to consume.”
A good while later, our night is drawing to a close. It’s been a night of numerous shots, loud and rambunctious toasts from Sophie, Zoe (Zander’s sister), my mom (yes, THAT was as horrifying as you can imagine) and now Kate is on her feet, swaying slightly and holding on to the table for dear life as she prepares to give her own spiel.
“Shh, shh! Let me get this out while I can still stand up,” she announces with a giggle. Looking down, she tilts her head and studies me. I can see her eyes glaze over and I know she’s struggling to hold back the tears.
“A few years ago, I remember you coming home one night and fanning yourself stupid over this ‘smoking hot volcano of fine’ you’d met on the train. He was hot, he had dimples, and for the first time in a long time, you were genuinely swooning over a man.”
She sighs and looks at my mom. “Sorry, Mrs Lewis, block your ears for this. Then I dared you to close up shop for three dates and wait until you sealed the deal. I hoped that this would give Delicious Daniel a chance to win you over and open your heart to more than just sex with the terrific three.”
The group sniggers before the table erupts with laughter. I look over at Samantha, Sean’s fiancée, and breathe a sigh of relief when I see her laughing along with everyone else. Phew! That could have been awkward, although going by what Kate told me of Sean and Sam’s dinner party a few weeks ago, maybe the awkward train had already passed the station. I mean, who wants to learn that your cop partner and your fiancée had been sleeping with the same person, i.e. ME, at the same point in time (but separately … I mean … never a threesome or foursome scenario … I wasn’t that much of a dirty skank back then. Well, maybe, there was this one time when …
NOPE, not me.
ANYWAY …
Kate lifts her glass of wine to her mouth, taking a sip before cradling the glass to her chest. Then the drunken tart (love her dearly) continues. “Well, fuck a duck if you didn’t stay true and hold out for the whole three dates. Even getting through the food sex with the tiramisu and holding out long enough to at least get behind closed doors before getting your freak on.”
There are a few sniggers around the table, but most of them are riveted as Kate retells the history of me and Superman. “Through the good times and the bad, the happy times and the sad, the running away and the coming back, meeting the in-laws and the added bonus of twins, not once have I doubted that Daniel was the one for you. And I know that deep down, you haven’t either. So, raise your glasses to the woman I love more than life itself, who will forever have one penis to play with for the rest of her days, we hope you’ve had a memorable last night of freedom. Now …”
She looks over at Sophie beside me. I follow her gaze and turn to watch as Sophie bends down and pulls a bag from underneath the table. “Us girls decided you needed a bachelorette goodie bag to celebrate with.” I snatch it from Sophie and open it up, snapping it shut just as fast as my face heats up beyond compare. I look up at Kate, who smirks down at me and winks, holding her glass out in front of her. “To Mac and Superman. May he continue to bless her heart and her vagina with love and never-ending orgasms.”
The rest of the table stand and repeat her cheer, loudly, making me groan with embarrassment and grabbing my own glass, downing the rest of my Sex On The Beach in one go before holding my glass up and whooping loudly for the whole club to hear. I stand up and sway as I hold on to my bag of goodies tightly beside me.
“Now, I must return to my superhero. There are toys to be played with and orgasms to be had.”
Daniel
I’m sitting at a table in my back yard with the guys. We’ve watched the game and now we’re out in the backyard enjoying a great meal courtesy of Noah’s grilling skills. As my best man, he’s taken charge of the evening but has so far respected my wish to have a quiet night with my friends. No strippers, no stupid dares and definitely no handcuffing me to a lamp post and leaving me stranded with a phone number written on my ass.
Going around the table there are Thomas and Cade, my two college buddies, Dave, my childhood friend, and Matt, Noah’s brother. The only person not here is Zander and that’s because he’s working an extra stint at the precinct, building up some extra money for his upcoming wedding to Kate.
“Hey, Winters. You looking forward to being hitched?” Cade pipes up. We met at the beginning of freshman year and after graduation, he got an internship at the same firm as me back home in Chicago. We’ve worked together ever since.
“Been waiting a long time for this. We’ve done everything else, this is the last step,” I reply with a smile. The wait has been worth it though, so damn worth it.
“You’re just looking forward to having sex on tap,” Noah pipes up from the opposite end of the table, giving me a knowing smirk.
Not missing a beat I reply instantly, “Already got that, buddy. A piece of paper isn’t gonna change that.” Fuck no, Mac wants it more than ever; twin dependent, of course.
“Just keep her away from that wedding cake. You know what they say, one bite of wedding cake and the sex dries up. Just saying.” Dave laughs which starts the rest of us off.
I raise an eyebrow. “Hold up, Dave, you’re the only married one in the group. Shouldn’t you be on my side?”
That just makes him laugh louder. “Dude, you have no idea. Haven’t you heard of the four rings of marriage. Engagement ring, wedding ring, suffer-ing and endure-ing.” That makes the entire table erupt in laughter again.
“Fuck that!” Matt announces loudly. “I’m happy being single and carefree. I tell you, last night I went home with a perfect ten.” That grabs everyone’s attention.
“How was she?” Noah asks with renewed interest, leaning forward and resting his elbows on the table. Those Taylor boys are like two peas in a pod; perpetual bachelors with no interest in settling down. Or that’s what
I thought until Noah told me otherwise.
“Man, it was all good until we got back to hers and the clothes started coming off. I did the old scratch and sniff test and fuck, man, that girl dropped five points then and there.” He screws his face up in disgust, earning a snigger from around the table.
I choke on my drink mid gulp. “Did you say scratch and sniff? Dude, what are you? Eighteen?”
He turns toward me and smirks, “Oh c’mon, Dan. Don’t tell me you’ve never done it? It’s the skank test. You’ve gotta check her out down below before you check. her. out.” I look at him in disbelief then spare a glance at Noah, who just rolls his eyes at me as he shakes his head at his younger sibling.
“So you left then?” Thomas asks.
“Fuck, no. I did the smart thing and suggested we have a shower together first. It killed two birds with one stone. Well, a bar of soap and my big cock solved the problem, anyway. Twenty minutes and a blow job later, she was clean and ready to go for round two. Let me tell you, good job I stayed too. She was a total freak in the sack. Definitely worth the extra effort.”
Noah just shakes his head and gives me a knowing look. I know Noah’s past, but Matt takes the cake for unbelievable hook-up stories, hands down.
Noah leans toward Matt and gives him a playful slap on the back of the head. “Dude, you sure we’re related cause there ain’t no way I’d ever do the scratch and sniff maneuver once I had the girl at her place. There’s a time and place for that, little bro, and you totally fucked it up.”
“I still got laid, didn’t I? And besides, she had no fucking clue. I even left her my number for a call back.” He leans back in his chair and crosses his legs, looking proud as punch.
“Maybe you’re running out of options,” Cade pipes up.
That causes Matt to scoff. “Fuck off, Cade. When was the last time you got laid, huh?”
“A gentleman never screws and tells,” Cade replies with a grin.
“A gentleman who isn’t getting screwed has nothing to tell,” Matt retorts which earns a chuckle from the rest of the table as Cade flicks a bottle cap right at Matt’s head.
Thomas lifts his chin to Noah, “Taylor, you need to teach your brother the ways of the world. Never leave a woman unsatisfied and for God’s sake, you never do scratch and sniff test. It’s a miracle you get laid at all, Matt.”
“Don’t hate the player, Tom. This girl might even be worth the effort. Was thinking of sending her a spa voucher. Seriously, she needs to be taught about the beauty of the Brazilian. Free waxing for women. I tell ya, the Mayor should put that on his ticket. He’d win all the votes, men and women alike.”
“I like the racing stripe. Leads the way to heaven,” Cade muses.
“Nope, bare and clear is the only way to go. Speaking of which, what’s with that scruff on your chin, brother?” Matt asks, directing the table’s attention to Noah’s newly grown goatee. It’s very short and tidy but definitely a newer, more mature look for my best friend. Mac commented on it the other week, telling him it looked hot. I made her make it up to me on her knees later that night.
I sit back and listen while the guys chat back and forth and the topic shifts from facial hair to football, back to sex, and then full circle again.
This is exactly what I wanted my bachelor party to be; a relaxed night with my closest friends. Feeling my phone vibrate in my pocket, I pull it out and smile when I see Mac’s name pop up on the screen.
Mac: You better be ready for some freaky Mac-robatic sexing Mr. Winters. I have a goodie bag of naughty treats waiting to be played with.
That little tease. First she gets me worked up on the doorstep and leaves me at half-mast most of the night, then she rings from the limo and sounds adorably drunk, reminding me of yesterday morning when she woke me up with her hot mouth on my cock, and now all I can think of is what kind of toys are in this goodie bag of hers.
Deciding to give her a taste of her own medicine, I type a reply.
Daniel: I look forward to testing them out on you. I think there will be a very thorough and exhaustive evaluation of these goodies.
Mac: Promises, promises, Superman.
Daniel: You should know by now that I never make a promise I don’t keep.
Mac: And I’m so drunk I’ll let you have your wicked way with me any way … anywhere. … anyhow …
Fuck!
Daniel: Freaky acrobatic sexing will just be the start. We have all night and all day tomorrow kid-free. Prepare to be worn out and walking funny.
Mac: Will shower head Daniel be involved? We wouldn’t want him to be left out …
Daniel: Grr, you won’t need anything other than me and my cock pounding into you.
Mac: Fuck, I’m wet. I’m gonna hop in a cab and come home now. I want you.
Daniel: I’m hard and waiting …
Mac: Dammit. You win.
Daniel: I never strive for gold, gorgeous. I always want silver, that way you’ll always come first ;)
Mac: Holy mother of God. Kill me now.
That’s it. Time for the guys to go. I need them gone by the time she gets home. Drunken Mac-robatic sexing takes priority each and every time.
Chapter 4: “Wild Wild Love”
Mac
As soon as the cab pulls into our driveway, I look to the front porch and see Daniel leaning against the front door looking as delicious as ever. As he walks toward me, I see he’s wearing a pair of loose-fitting gray sweats and a long-sleeved black Henley. Damn, the things that man does to me without even touching should be illegal.
I’m riveted and distracted as he walks around to the driver’s window and hands him the money to pay my fare before he walks back around and opens my door. Clutching my bag of dirty fun in one hand and my purse in the other, I look up at him in awe as he stands there with his hand out and a perceptive grin.
“C’mon, gorgeous. Time to come inside.”
“Thought that was your job,” I say, forgetting that I’m sitting inside the cab and within earshot of the driver.
Daniel laughs before grabbing my hand and helping me to my very shaky feet, causing me to reach out and grab his biceps. “Shit,” I mutter under my breath as I’m gently moved sideways so that he can shut the car door behind me.
With a double tap on the roof of the cab, he bends slightly before scooping me up into his arms, one wrapped around my shoulders and the other underneath my knees. “Whoa, Superman. Pulling out all the stops?” I lean forward so that my mouth is right by his ear. “You do know I’m a sure thing tonight, right?”
He lets out a husky laugh and my nether regions quiver at the sound. Hell, our neighbors won’t mind if I jump my fiancé right here in the front yard will they? Old Mrs. Brayden across the street probably needs a thrill. Her girl parts will have been out of order for years now.
“Mac, you just shuddered. Where did your mind just go?”
I shake my head, trying to rid the thought of barren deserts and cobwebs from my brain. “Ah, nowhere. Now, hurry up and get me inside. I have naked things to do to you.”
He effortlessly carries me up the three front steps and through the front door, slamming it shut behind us with a short, sharp kick before continuing up the staircase toward our bedroom.
“Shit, the munchkins. Where are they?”
Tilting his head down toward me, his eyes dance with amusement, obviously at my expense but I can’t work out why. “Exactly how drunk are you, Mac? Legless, ‘looming threat of being vomited on’ drunk or ‘thrill-seeking, sexy uninhibited’ drunk? Because I’m worried at the fact you’ve forgotten our children are at my parents’ for the night.”
I cover my mouth and start giggling, whacking him in the face with the sack of sexy stuff in the process. “Fuck,” he mutters as he walks into our bedroom and stops as he reaches the bed, slowly lowering me before standing up.
Looking down at me, he grins as he takes in my now indecent dress and my hands holding on tight to my purse and dirty bag of tr
icks. “I don’t know where to start,” he notes.
“How about with your penis in my mouth?” I whisper as I take in his beautiful, slightly hazy face. Give me a break, Kate was plying me with drinks all night.
He chuckles, before leaning down and easing my purse out of my hand gently then putting it on the nightstand. He moves to the treasure trove of deviance but stops when I growl up at him. He freezes and turns his head to look me dead straight in the eye. “Was that a growl?” he asks incredulously.
“Mine,” I say childishly before lying back, giggling when I try to hold it out of his reach.
Without warning he’s lying on top of me, pushing me into the mattress with his full weight and ripping the gifts of delight out of my hands. With a lifting of my hips against his growing hardness, I moan loudly and without a care in the world as he throws the bag off the bed and places his elbows on either side of my head, resting his head in his hands as he looks down at me hungrily.
“Fuck, you’re beautiful,” he murmurs before lowering his mouth and softly kissing my lips, his tongue tracing the outline of my mouth before making its way inside to seek mine. If this is his form of torture, then I will willingly give myself up to him. This man owns me body, heart and soul and with kisses like this, when he slowly and surely claims every part of my mouth, he’s proving just how much he knows it.
I moan into his mouth which just seems to spur him on, and soon we’re all hands and thrusts as I tangle my fingers into his hair, marveling at how soft the strands feel against my skin. He suddenly pushes himself off me, standing in front of me with his arms out. Unable to resist, I look down and grin at his tented sweats. I prop myself up on my elbows and slowly peruse his body until my eyes meet his.
“You sure you want to stop, Superman? Because it seems that one of your super parts has other ideas.”
He snorts and smiles before snaking his hands around my chest and pulling me up against him, pushing said hard super part against me. “I can wait. What I really want is you, naked, and on your knees. Isn’t that what you promised this afternoon?” His voice is low and gravelly, giving away just how turned on he is. It’s one thing that I’ve marveled at the longer we’ve been together. The little nuances you learn about your significant other as more time passes. Like how Daniel loves, and I mean loves, morning head, how his voice drops an octave when something really affects him, and how a thorough and spine-tingling kiss from me can make any annoyance he might have melt away. Right now, he’s horny as fuck and a rabid Daniel is hot as hell.
