“Can I ask you a personal question?”
“Go ahead.”
“Where’s Tyler’s mother?”
Seven
Rolling his neck, he stared over the top of Jed McCormack’s huge house like he was a thousand miles away all of a sudden. When she thought he wouldn’t answer, he did. “New York, I guess.” He didn’t meet her eyes.
“Is she a model or something? A stock broker?”
He grunted. “Hardly. She’s a pro, Ember. She works the streets to support her drug habit. Meth, the last I heard.”
Meth? So not good. Just as quickly, another enlightenment came. Damn. His wife’s a prostitute. That’s why he doesn’t objectify women’s bodies. That’s why he protects Tyler. Wow. He might not be gay after all.
“I’m sorry,” was all she could come up with.
“Me, too.” He stretched his long legs down the steps in front of him. “We got married during my last tour. She seemed full of life and energy, and me? I was stupid in love—or lust—or whatever the heck was going on in my head. It sure wasn’t brains. I missed all the signs. One day the Red Cross contacted me. I’d just come in from a two-month field assignment. They said I had a family emergency; that my wife was in premature labor with complications. I flew home on compassionate leave. It wasn’t until she delivered that I wised up to how bad things really were. Her doctor let me have it.”
“What complications?”
“Tyler was addicted when he was born. Poor little guy screamed for months. God, he suffered.”
A picture of sweet little Tyler waving to her at the gym and telling her ‘See you later, alligator,’ flashed to her mind. She wanted to cry at the thought of him suffering for the stupid decisions of his mother. “That had to be awful.”
“It was. That’s why he talks like he does. We live a very structured life at home. I work with him every night on his numbers. Speech. Letters. Everything. I enrolled him in preschool, but they wanted him on medication before they’d let him attend. Said they couldn’t handle him because he wouldn’t sit still. He’s got Attention Deficit Disorder and hyperactivity as a result of his addiction. That’s all. He could’ve been a lot worse.”
“Me, too,” she admitted. “It’s not as bad as when I was younger, but there are ways to deal with it.”
“I won’t medicate my son, so I tutor him myself.” Dark blues scrutinized McCormack’s lavish brick design. “That’s why I’m protective of Tyler. No one will ever hurt him again.”
“That’s why you don’t take overseas assignments, isn’t it?”
“Right. Alex has been real good to work with me. He knows I’ll pinch hit when necessary, like the op into Mexico last year, but mostly I handle day jobs, bodyguard or escort assignments. I’m his least valuable asset.”
Ember couldn’t believe the change in her companion agent. “You are not. I’ve heard him. You got shot in Mexico. You kept shooting even though you’d taken three hits. You saved Mark’s life. Alex thinks the world of you. Everyone does.” And I knew there was a reason I liked you.
“If you say so.”
“It’s true.”
He didn’t answer.
“So I’m the only one who knows?” she asked quietly.
“Connor and Izza do. They’re good friends. And Alex.” Rory looked directly at her. “Sorry. It’s not something fun like belonging to a party-all-night club.”
“It’s nice you’re telling me all this, though,” she said thoughtfully. “Your private eye guy located your wife in New York, then?”
Rory blew out a weary sigh, his tongue stuck in his cheek. “The first time she was in Detroit. She said she had family there, if that’s what you want to call her customers, you know, all her johns. Then Cleveland, New Jersey, New York. Last I heard she had a pimp. I quit looking.”
“So, umm, you’re divorced?” Ember cringed when she asked. She’d always been attracted to Rory. His single status had a lot to do with that attraction. If he was still married, even in what sounded like a really bad marriage, she didn’t want to entertain the notion. Married men were hands off. Trouble.
“I had to divorce her. She was killing me. She racked up more debt in a couple of months than I’d had in my whole life. I had to cut her off to save Tyler. He’s the one who needs me. Not her. All she needs is a fix and a cheap place to sleep it off.”
“But you still love her.”
No answer. Dumb question. Of course he still loved her. Ember backpedaled, afraid she’d passed the limit of covert agent propriety, whatever that was. “You have a son to be proud of.”
“I do. I am. He’s the best part in my life.”
“If you don’t mind me asking, what was her name?”
“Elizabeth Winchester Calhoun Dennison.” He grunted like the memory didn’t hurt. “Everyone called her Ellie.”
Hmm. That meant he called her Ellie. And he loved Ellie once upon a time, enough to make a baby with her.
“That’s a beautiful name. What did she look like?” Ember cringed again, not sure why she needed to know what his ex-wife looked like. It wasn’t important, but if he was willing to share....
“It doesn’t matter. She’s gone.”
The Dennison wall was back up, but Ember heard the real reason. He didn’t want to tell her. Ellie must’ve been beautiful. Ember couldn’t imagine him with anything less. “I’m sorry. I’ll shut up. It’s none of my business anyway.”
The silence between them lasted only as long as his next sigh. “No, you’re good. It’s just that she never saw Tyler, not even once. He wasn’t breathing when he was born. The nurses grabbed him and rushed him away. Scared the hell out of me. She was in the birthing room getting cleaned up. He was in the NICU, the neonatal intensive care unit, while I was getting my butt reamed for letting her do drugs. Like I had anything to say about the crap she did while I was deployed. By the time I got back to her room, she’d taken off. Left a note on her pillow. Said she never really wanted to get married in the first place; the kid was my fault. My problem. She was out of there. Here she’d given birth to the most perfect little guy in the universe, and she threw him away like trash.”
A tear slipped out of her eye. What a stupid trade-off, leaving a guy the likes of Rory and a son as sweet as Tyler for drugs. Gold for chaff. Ellie was just plain stupid.
All at once, Rory’s hand was on her shoulder. “Sorry. You don’t need to hear my problems.”
She stifled a sob, wanting to rush back to the gym and snuggle sweet little Tyler. He and his father both needed a hug. She did, too. If only.
“Come on, don’t cry,” he persisted, his hand gently massaging her shoulder. “Guess I need to learn when to shut up, don’t I?”
And I need to stop jumping to conclusions.
“Give me a minute,” she said through her sniffles. “I’m sorry I gave you such a bad time before. I never knew.”
“There was no way you could’ve. I run a pretty tight ship. Mark and Zack don’t even know. Harley might. He’s more intuitive than most guys.”
She wiped her nose on the sleeve of her hoody. “Sheesh. I wish tear ducts were on the bottom of our feet, don’t you?”
Unexpectedly, he put his arm around her. With a gentle swipe of his fingertip, he wiped the moisture from her cheek. “But think of all the soggy socks you’d have.”
Her breath hitched. For once, she couldn’t meet his handsome gaze. Time stopped ticking. She couldn’t have heard it anyway the way her heart was hammering like it needed to get out of her chest. Sheesh. His breath on her cheek sent shivers down to her toes. She blinked. He didn’t. Wow. He has really thick lashes.
“If I still had my phone, I’d show you the pictures from Yellowstone. They’d make you smile again.”
“Oh?” Right now everything out of this man’s mouth made her lips want to smile and do a couple other things, too. Like kiss him. Taste him.
“Yes. I got a real cute shot of Tyler sitting with his Sizzly Bear at Fishing
Bridge. I was going to frame it and hang it in his bedroom. Guess I missed my chance.”
“His what?” She wiped her face with her hoody sleeve one last time.
“I bought him a stuffed bear at Yellowstone. He couldn’t say Grizzly Bear, so it became Mr. Sizzly Bear, only he says it kind of like Sizz-wee Bear.”
“I didn’t know you went to Yellowstone,” she said, still enjoying the feel of his arm around her. Wow. He’s so strong. And solid. And warm. Her nose twitched. She couldn’t remember him buying men’s cologne when they’d stopped for new clothes, but damn. He smelled good. Kind of like soap. Body wash. Him.
“Alex gave everyone involved in the Mexico operation quite a bit of time off when we got home. While I was recuperating, Tyler and me headed west. We camped out, did some fly-fishing in Montana, about everything two guys could think of. Went through the east gate of Yellowstone and had a ball seeing the sights.”
“How’d you do all that with your leg injury? Weren’t you shot in the leg?”
“Guess it’s the Marine in me. I’m never too banged up I can’t make my son happy. ʼSides, I used a cane for awhile.”
“Why are you telling me this?” she asked, his lips close enough she could taste them if she wanted to. Her tongue involuntarily responded to the thought, moistening her bottom lip. Just in case he was thinking the same thing. His eyes were extra blue right now. Extra deep. Dark. Sexy. Her heart fluttered. He licked his bottom lip. Wow. He just might be thinking the same thing.
“Maybe it’s because I can finally see you instead of all your make-up.” Playfully, he tapped the end of her nose, breaking the spell.
She was speechless, but he wasn’t done.
“Nima said something before. She told me that if I keep hiding, no one would ever find me. I got the oddest sensation I should tell you about Tyler, that I didn’t have to hide him from you anymore. I usually keep him to myself.”
Wow. Rory trusted her? She’d just become part of a very private club.
She heard a light knock on the door behind them. Rory reached back and turned the knob. Out walked a sleepy Nima straight for Ember’s lap. Thankful for the interruption to his heady revelations, Ember leaned away from him and snuggled the girl into her arms. “Are you feeling better?”
Nima stared straight through her with those spooky eyes of hers. Ember’s breath caught. She had to clutch Rory’s elbow for support. The oddest sensation of being violated swept through her, but at the same time, she was infused with peace.
Nima’s calmer than calm voice radiated all the way to her unorthodox, free-spirited toes. “If you seek to heal your own tears, seek first to heal the sadness of another.”
Ember reeled. The words pierced her heart. That’s what she’d felt for Rory and Tyler—like she’d wanted to ease their sadness, but how could Nima know? How could a tiny little person even form that kind of a sentence when she hardly spoke any other time in any language? Why now? Ember shivered, feeling suddenly stripped bare and exposed.
“What did you say?” Rory turned the child to face him. Nima only smiled while her countenance returned to normal. Her lips sealed again, she snuggled into Ember’s arms like an embarrassed little girl.
Ember’s heart beat like a full brass band in her ribcage. She glanced over at Rory, sure he could hear it, too. “This kid is too much. Wow.”
“What did she tell you?”
Right on cue, the wind came up. Leaves blew across the driveway in a swirling bluster of dust. Dark clouds closed in from the west.
“Looks like it might storm.” He picked Nima up and helped Ember to her feet. “Let’s go in, ladies, then we’ll talk.”
Ember glanced skyward. The air was charged with electricity that made the hair on the back of her neck stand up. A sharp crack of lightning hit somewhere close by, too close for comfort. Most children would have been scared to death at the display Mother Nature unleashed, but not Nima. She smiled that same mysterious smile again and peered up at the sky as if she’d been looking for the rain, and it was late.
Was the little girl somehow in tune with Mother Nature? Did Nima anticipate the storm? As quickly as Ember shook the foolish notion from her head, another materialized. Had Nima simply requested the storm and Mother Nature obeyed?
It feels true, but wow. Who is this little girl?
Rory shut the door behind them as the fury of the storm unleashed. Lightning stabbed the green field and woods. Trees bent to the earth as a wild wind raged, pillaged, and thunder roared. Pounding sheets of driven rain hammered the house.
“Whew! Just in time.” He stomped his feet at the door, shaking the rain out of his hair. “That came up in a hurry. Hope Maxwell and Fred don’t get lost. They should’ve been here by now. So what’d she say?”
Ember didn’t answer. She couldn’t. Still speechless from what she thought she’d witnessed, she went straight to the couch, needing to sit before she fell down.
He came to sit beside her with Nima. “You okay?”
Maybe. Maybe not. Seek first to heal my own tears? Wow. Where to begin?
Todd Chandler’s handsome smiling face came to mind. Losing him had literally pushed her into the deep end. She’d gone dark. Darker than dark. Immersed her body in the blackest clothes and her hair in the deepest, blackest dyes, her heart in soulless music and unholy thinking. She’d sought for an end to the pain gnawing from the inside out, but settled for lesser ways to vent the anguish.
In the end only work kept her sane. The guys on The TEAM kept her returning to the job she loved; her real family. Not her mother. Never her father. Only the ones who valued her when she didn’t value herself. Alex. Harley. Mother. Zack. That real family. It dawned on her that Rory was part of that same good family. Aloof maybe, but present even when she was not there for herself.
Wow.
Her nose detected the men’s body wash from the safe house, mingled with that other smell—that all American, he-should-have-been, could-have-been a model smell. It was in the wind they’d run in from. Fresh. Clean. Full of life. And power. Wow. Ember gulped without enough saliva in her throat to actually swallow. In one fell swoop, Nima had tied Ember’s heart to another. To Rory. To Tyler. Why now? Why him?
Yet he sat oblivious to the revelation, waiting for an answer. Just like a man. A good man.
When she could speak, her voice sounded far away, as if someone else was speaking for her. “If you seek to heal your own tears, seek first to heal the sadness of another.”
Nima scooted from his arms to hers. “Yep,” she said quietly.
“It’s like she knows us inside out,” he said, his voice full of gentleness. “But what tears could you possibly need to heal?”
“I, umm, guess everyone’s got some sad days in their past. I’m no different than you,” she said quietly, wondering why the deep connection with him all of a sudden. She’d thoroughly enjoyed her relationship with Todd. It was easy. Uncomplicated. They’d loved and played together, but Rory? Nothing about him seemed easy, not from the start. A connection with him would bring pain. There’d be no easing of sadness. There might even be—love. And that’s what scared her the most. She’d been down that road with Todd Chandler. Love meant pain. The greater the love, the harder the hit when it ended, and it always ended. In the front yard. In foster homes. At Arlington.
“How about if I start a fire?” he asked softly. “You look cold.”
Ember shivered. She was definitely cold all right, but Mother Nature had nothing to do with the change in temperature. Ember wasn’t on her safe, comfortable path anymore. Her paradigms had changed, and she knew it. She wanted her cat. Maple Syrup was huggable. Comfortable. Safe.
Rory knelt at the fireplace. When the gas flame sprang to life, he was caught in the silhouette of the orange-gold glow. He turned back to her with a grin and a wink. “That was hard. You gotta love a gas fireplace, huh? Just flick a switch and bam, instant cozy.”
She couldn’t make her eyes move off of him. The spot
light of gold behind him rattled another paradigm. Just when her life was predictable, the universe opened wide and out dropped—Rory Dennison. And Tyler. And Nima. A ready made family. Wow....
He came back to sit with her and Nima, and with one fluid motion, rested his arm along the back of the couch. It felt completely natural behind her and Nima’s shoulders. Like a father’s arm around his child and his—
Ember jumped to her feet. “Anyone want a bowl of ice cream? I think I spotted some in the freezer.”
“Sure. I’ll help.” He was agreeable all of a sudden. What happened to the rude guy who’d snapped her head off every time she opened her mouth yesterday? She wanted him back, and she wanted him now. And why did the glow from the fireplace stick to him?
He pulled three bowls from the cupboard and three spoons from the drawer while she’d gone from eight fingers to ten thumbs. Her trembling fingers would not lift the lid off the carton of chocolate almond ice cream. What is wrong with me?
“Do you think Nima has ever tasted ice cream before?” he asked. “Do they have ice cream in India?”
Whoa. Even his voice had changed. It was somehow deeper and stronger and—
No! No! No! This was so not happening! It had to stop, but when she glanced sideways at him, prepared to snap his head off for being so—nice, her stupid heart got stuck in her throat, suffocating any denial from squeaking forth. Her resolve melted like the chocolate almond ice cream in the rain.
“Hope so,” she said, as sweetly as if she meant it.
Eight
“Shit!” Rory growled. “Grab Nima. Now!”
Ember blinked at him like he’d suddenly spoken Greek.
“We’ve got company. Move it!”
She got the message. With a mad dash, she grabbed Nima off the couch. Ember looped her arm through the plastic bags of clothing they’d bought. “Hold tight, baby girl. Don’t let go.”
“There’s a couple of men outside McCormack’s back door,” Rory growled. “Not Maxwell and Fred. Damn it. Where are they?”
Lightning detonated outside, the bright flash followed swiftly by booming thunder. Rory had his SIG drawn, his back flat to the wall beside the front door. He motioned Ember to his side. She looked plenty scared, and for the first time, so was he. How were these guys tracking them?
Rory (In the Company of Snipers Book 6) Page 9
