He took two long strides and backed me against the wall. He pressed his hard body against mine. I shuddered and pressed my hands against his chest to push him away, but instead I found myself gliding my fingers up and down the smooth material of his shirt, wishing it were his bare chest instead.
“I thought it would be enough. It had to be enough. But it wasn’t.” His dark gaze bore into mine. “The thought of you with someone else, the thought of someone penetrating the body I had claimed made me want to murder someone…and that was before I got to know you.” He ran his hand down the side of my face. “Our date changed everything.”
His words burned through me, weakened me. They made me want to cling to him, to yank his perfect lips against my own.
This man followed you, stalked you, invaded your privacy. He moved your best friend away. He made it so you had no choice but to fuck him and you want to reward him? My conscience punched me in gut. Haven’t you learned your lesson from Kevin?
I shoved against Cole’s chest, but he didn’t move an inch. “Get away from me.”
“You don’t really mean that.”
“Yes, I fucking do!” I shoved again and this time he took one step back, but not far enough where I could get away from him.
“You care about me.”
I snorted. “Really? I care about you? I could never care for someone who looks at me as a piece of ass, which is all I have been to you, not to mention the fact that you have been stalking me and fucking with my life without me even knowing about it.”
“Sometimes you have to do bad things to get what you want.” He said the words so matter of factly I almost believed they were something a sane person would say.
“To get what you want, huh? Well, you got it, didn’t you? You got to bend me over and fuck me just like you planned. I fell for your stupid game. I didn’t even know I was being played.” Hot tears built behind my eyes.
“It wasn’t a game, Julia.”
“It wasn’t? Then what the fuck was it?”
“I got to know you. I found out that you weren’t just some—”
“Some what?” I screeched. “Some piece of ass?” I laughed to try to fight the tears back. “That’s what I am.”
The words were meant more for me than for him. I’d told him so in the car. Stripping and fucking were the only things I was good at. For a moment he’d made me reconsider that about myself, yet he, more than anyone, was the one who believed it.
“You’re not, dammit.” He slammed his closed fist into the wall next to me. I flinched. “You’re different. You’re not like them,” he growled.
“Is that what you’re telling yourself to make you feel better about liking me? Oh, poor Cole likes a woman beneath his fabulous lifestyle. He likes a woman who spreads her legs for a living. A woman who grinds against strangers for money.” I enunciated each word. “Well, you don’t get to make yourself feel better about it. I am a stripper and I fucked you because I was paid to do it and you liked it. Better yet, you paid me to fuck you. That’s worse than me fucking Vic. Vic and I mutually benefitted because we needed the money, but you had to own me. So you paid me fifteen grand to take your cock while everyone watched. You’re pathetic.”
I expected him to explode. To yell at me and make this easier for me to walk away, because that’s what I was going to do. I was going to walk away from him before I started bawling.
He didn’t though. Instead he leaned in and put his hands on the wall on either side of my face. “I don’t care, Julia. I think you’re missing what I’m saying. I don’t give a shit about any of that. I would have paid a million dollars to have you on that table, my cock buried deep inside you if it meant I would get to know you the way I have in the last couple of days.” He rubbed his nose against mine. “I’ve never felt like this before. When you left yesterday…I felt so lost.” His voice cracked at the end. The sound almost broke me. Almost. “I want to take care of you, Julia. You don’t need this job. I can provide for you and your gran. You don’t need this life.”
“Excuse me? And then I’d be what? Your paid whore?”
“No, that’s not what I meant. You’re not listening!” He pushed away from me breaking all contact. He squeezed his fists repeatedly.
“I am listening and that’s what you’re saying. But I’d rather work here than be that any day. I won’t be kept by some man because he has control issues!” I huffed and turned away from him. I couldn’t look at him anymore. I wanted to scrub my eyes and brain to get his image out of my mind.
I’d almost made it to the door when he spoke.
“I was going to tell you the truth. Yesterday. I had started to when my phone rang and when I got off the phone you were gone and I found the computer open to your file.” His voice seemed to tremble, but I still didn’t turn around. “Don’t you see it?”
“See what?” I whispered.
“I love you, Julia.” He was right behind me when he spoke, his warm breath caressing my ear. I shivered. The words targeted my heart. I wanted to turn around to pull him to me. No!
“What?” But I didn’t turn around.
“Julia, I—”
“No.” I shook my head. “You don’t.”
“Yes. I—”
“Don’t fucking say it again.” I lurched for the door, my hand wrapping around the silver knob. It was cold against my trembling fingers. The first tears fell as I swung it open. They were hot against my skin, so different from the cold on my fingers. I walked through the threshold. Each step was easier than the last, carrying me away from him. From Cole.
“Wait, Julia. Don’t leave.” His voice cracked.
“I quit,” I said, and even though I desperately wanted to look back, to turn around and run to him, I didn’t.
Epilogue.
It’s been four months since I left Cole in his office. I haven’t seen him since. I figure he left, that he went back to New York or wherever it is he calls home. Some fancy island off the Caribbean maybe. Even though he isn’t around, I know he still watches me.
I’m smarter now and I notice them, the people he pays to keep tabs on me. They’re around me all the time. I can feel them, their prying eyes. But they don’t bother me like one would think. I take comfort in knowing they’re there. That my meager existence still occupies his thoughts and time.
I wonder what he thinks of me now.
Getting paid minimum wage working the night shift at a gas station was far from the luxury life I’d lived. Funny, he thought I couldn’t go any lower. Proved ya wrong, huh? Maybe that was why he hadn’t been at the door of my new seedy apartment building, demanding to see me.
He hadn’t called either. Was it wrong that I’d anticipated that? I thought he’d chase me, to make me see his side. He didn’t.
The bell over the door at the gas station chimed and I glanced up, expecting to see a drunken patron. It was two-thirty in the morning, after all. But it wasn’t. Cole stood there, his hair loose, stubble on his jaw.
He approached the counter with smooth fluid movements. I should have been mad. I should have been outraged that he would dare show his face anywhere near me, but I wasn’t. I drank in his perfection, his lips that I knew so briefly, the dark pools of his eyes…and smiled.
Thanks so much for taking the time to check out Drowning in Rapture. I hope you love Cole and Julia as much as I do! If you liked the book (or even if you didn’t!) I would greatly appreciate it if you left your thoughts on Amazon, Goodreads, etc. (And of course email me, and tell me about! I love hearing from fans.)
Look for book number two in the Rapture trilogy, Clinging to Rapture, in Fall 2014.
To learn more about the trilogy or Megan’s other books, check out her website.
http://www.MeganDMartin.blogspot.com
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
I couldn’t have written this book without the love and support of my badass parents, Drew and Paula. I love y’all!
Special thanks to Kenya Wright and Rosa Sophia for
being my awesome editors and telling me how it is! And to Najla Qamber for her amazing work on the cover.
Last, but not least, thanks to Jade Eby and Dee Little for being my no nonsense beta readers. I heart y’all!!!
Drowning in Rapture: Rapture, Book One Page 11
