by Marian Tee
Tarif’s jaw tightened.
“And you know why. I know you know why.”
If she had said this two months ago – one week ago, hell, even one day ago – he would have told her no. She was wrong. He had no idea what she was talking about, and he would have meant it.
But things were different now, and unease uncoiled inside of Tarif as he recalled the things he had recently learned about Anisah.
Smiles are a luxury to her, and so are her tears.
She doesn’t believe she has the right to smile or cry when so many people had lost their lives because of our father.
Everything she does is to atone for sins even when she’s a victim herself!
In the beginning, all Tarif had set out to do was to make Anisah regret her unflattering opinion of him. But then he had gotten to know her more, and with it he found himself wanting something different – he had wanted her to realize she was the man meant to take her virginity.
And now, things had changed again.
The things he used to want had lost their value. They had ceased to matter the moment he realized he had achieved something else – something greater and more precious.
He had sought to change her opinion about him, and he had done that. He had sought to seduce her and make her want him the way a woman wanted a man, and he had done that. But one thing he had not sought and yet still ended up doing was giving her a reason to smile.
He actually had the ability to make her smile and laugh the way she made him smile and laugh, and goddammit, if he had to choose – he would rather have her smile than her body.
Life had dealt Anisah the worst card in the pack by giving her a father like Sidqi Kahveci, but she had overcome this with quiet dignity and strength that bordered on obstinacy. While she might constantly exasperate him with her recklessness and defiance, Anisah was also one of the few women in this world he genuinely respected. Her refusal to compromise and her willingness to stand for her convictions were the things he admired most about her, never mind if they were also the same traits that made her fight against the sexual attraction simmering between them.
Anisah of all people deserved to have something to smile about for the rest of her days. He genuinely wanted that for her – but did he want it enough to give up on making Anisah his lover?
Tarif knew it was only a question of time – a matter of when and not if – before Anisah became his. Sooner or later, she would be his woman – but would his honor allow this even if it meant Anisah changing for good? Did he want her enough to risk destroying the very things he wanted about her?
“Sheikh?” The odd look on the sheikh’s eyes made Anisah wary. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Probably because I can’t make up my mind if I want to strangle you or kiss you.”
Her mouth opened and closed.
“Any preference?”
Getting strangled would kill her, but since getting kissed would be just as suicidal, she could only frown at him, muttering, “There is no lesser evil between the two.”
A crooked smile played on the sheikh’s lips. “I see.”
He did?
“I’ll make the choice for you then, anisdi.”
She stilled.
“I promise not to bother you again…if you promise you’ll always find a reason to smile.”
Chapter Ten
Apples were fruits, whales were not fishes, and Tarif Al-Atassi was a selfish playboy sheikh. These were the facts in life that kept the world turning, and disproving any of them were what made the world come tumbling down.
Like hers did now.
I promise not to bother you again…if you promise you’ll always find a reason to smile.
Anisah was almost tempted to treat the whole thing like a joke and pretend she hadn’t heard him right. Excuse me? Say that again, Your Highness? Did you actually let something else overrule your ego and that thing between your legs for once?
Oh, if only she could say such things.
If only she could be so rude.
If only.
But she would not be herself if she had said any of those things, and so an almost helpless sort of laughter started to bubble in Anisah’s throat as defeat became imminently uncertain. She had begged him not to be funny, so the cursed man had chosen to be nice instead, which was a thousand times worse.
She thought of the way they had been circling each other for so many weeks now, sometimes like knights in a joust, other times like a couple about to dance a waltz. Every instance had been as dangerous as it was exciting, with twists and turns that forced them to come into contact, often too close for comfort, so cursedly close there was no way not to see through each other’s souls.
In the course of their swordplay, in the middle of their dance – she didn’t really know how or when exactly it had happened; all she knew was that for such a long time now, the sheikh had ceased being a one-dimensional symbol of her fears.
Tarif Al-Atassi, with his blazing charm and gorgeous looks, his penchant for getting into scandals and overstepping the bounds of tradition and propriety, represented disruption, chaos, and all the things that could undermine the proper and peaceful life she had so painstakingly built for herself and Hyacinth.
And yet…somewhere down the road, she had ceased to care that he was so. Somewhere along the way, he had become something else – something more, and now, with just how every fight and every dance had to end – it was time for Anisah to make a decision.
Did she want to fight and dance with him again?
As her gaze slowly lifted to the sheikh’s, a part of her hoped against hope that he wouldn’t force her to choose. It was cowardly and shameful, but oh, she wished he would simply tell her he had changed his mind and he was not letting her go, after all.
But when the sheikh finally spoke, his soft, polite tone was everything she did not want to hear. “I suppose it’s pointless to ask what your decision is.”
More than anything else, it was that voice of his which told her he was letting her go – and all because he wanted to see her smile? Her fists clenched under the table at the thought. Say yes, Anisah. Let him leave. End it here. But instead she heard herself ask, “Why would you even ask for such a thing?”
“The hell if I know.”
His words were a mixture of irritation and self-disgust, as if the sheikh himself couldn’t believe he had made such a suggestion, and Anisah’s hands flew to her mouth in an effort to prevent hysterical laughter from spilling out. You and me both, Your Highness.
He started to stand, and she let him. He started to turn away, and she let him. But then he started to walk away, and that was her undoing.
“Where are you going, Your Highness?”
Tarif slowly turned to face her again, lip curled in contemptuous disbelief. “Where do you think?” he snarled. And what the hell did she think she was playing? Had his pursuit of her gone to her fucking head and made Anisah think she could toy with him like he was a fucking –
“I h-haven’t even given you an answer yet.”
The sound of her stammering was so damn rare it had the sheikh frowning. It was not like her at all, and he found himself wondering again if perhaps this was just a game to her. “I don’t need to stay behind to hear it, anisdi. I’m not some wimp who’d expire from lack of closure.”
“I k-know that.” Anisah tried to placate the sheikh even as she fought off a nervous smile at the sheikh’s disgusted tone.
“Good. Then if you’ll excuse me---”
“But Your Highness---”
“Maehdina, anisdi,” the sheikh apologized coolly, “but I do not see any point in continuing this conversation.” But as soon as he swung back, he heard her speak.
“Even if it’s to tell you I want you to stay?”
Tarif stiffened.
“I was never the selfish type, Your Highness, but I guess it’s your bad influence rubbing off---” Her voice ended in a gasp at the speed in which the she
ikh had abruptly turned to face her.
“What the hell are you saying?” Tarif growled. “And I want a fucking straight answer this time.”
“Or what?” she challenged unthinkingly and stiffened when she saw the way the sheikh’s eyes flashed.
Oh no.
In one swift movement, the sheikh had slid back into the booth next to her, pushing her back against the window. Apprehension flickered in her eyes. Good. But then her lips parted, and he was stunned to hear her repeat tremulously, “Or what, Your Highness?”
What the---
But before he could even get over the sheer audacity of her reply, Tarif was in for another shock of his life as he felt Anisah’s soft, slim fingers curl around his cock.
WHAT THE FUCK?
His phallus grew thick and rigid in an instant, and it swelled even more when he saw the way Anisah’s eyes flew wide open at feeling his erection grow between her fingers.
For one long moment, they stared at each other, his gaze demanding for answers while hers were clouded and unreadable.
Her fingers suddenly squeezed his throbbing cock, catching Tarif by surprise, and he sucked his breath in hard. What the hell was this? It was like finding himself thrown into some kind of parallel universe where manwhores like him played the coy virgin and prim and proper damsels like Anisah suddenly became bold seductresses.
Anisah stared down at her fingers as they started to move again of their own volition. It was a strangely mesmerizing sight that left her thoughts in shambles. Could she really do this, Anisah wondered dazedly. Could she, really?
“What the fuck’s going on, Tory?”
Creamy moisture lined her folds at the roughness of the sheikh’s voice, and she bit her lip hard as every stroke of her fingers over the sheikh’s manhood left her feeling increasingly heady.
I promise not to bother you again…if you promise you’ll always find a reason to smile.
He wasn’t supposed to be able to say such things, but he had. He wasn’t supposed to even want to say anything like it, but he had, and now nothing was the same again.
She had once thought that the sheikh’s kisses were his most potent weapon – that his ability to seduce her would be her downfall.
But she was wrong. Maybe it was because she was not like most women, and he was not like most men, but oh, how wrong she had been – so, so wrong on that score. In the end, what she never saw coming until it was too late and it was impossible to run away –
I promise not to bother you again…if you promise you’ll always find a reason to smile.
It was that gentle, rarely seen side of Tarif Al-Atassi that ended up destroying her in a blink, like a tiny taste of the forbidden---
Anisah’s fingers curled tightly around the sheikh’s member in reflex: steel under denim, power and heat, heaven and hell.
And she was ruined for good.
Anisah’s fingers started moving just a little faster, and she heard the sheikh mutter an expletive in a voice thickened with desire. It was a gloriously delicious sound, and butterflies spread its wings inside her tummy. A part of her was still reeling from her decision, but a larger part of her knew that it was as the sheikh had said. It was…inevitable.
And so she heard herself say, “You must p-promise me three things first.”
“Anything.” The sheikh meant it. At this point, he would do anything and everything she asked for as long as she kept stroking his cock like that---
Her fingers squeezed his throbbing arousal, and Tarif groaned in pure, raw need.
Oooooh. Seeing and hearing the sheikh experience pleasure over her touch had Anisah’s toes curling, and she loved the sound of it so much that she found herself squeezing his manhood one more time.
The sheikh groaned again.
Aaah. Maybe one more time?
But just as her fingers started to tighten, the sheikh rasped, “Your conditions, my sweet. Tell me what the hell they are so we can get to the fucking bit.”
Oh! Right! Embarrassed at how easily distracted she was, Anisah started to yank her hand away, but the sheikh swiftly gripped her hand and made her fingers curl around his erection again.
“Don’t stop touching me.”
The sheikh’s rough voice made her shudder in reciprocal need, and she bit her lip hard. “O-Okay.” Her voice came out a faint croak, and she winced at the sound. If this was how he could make her feel with just her hand around his manhood, how much worse could it be if---
“Your rules, Tory.” The sheikh’s voice was a mixture of impatience and hunger.
Frazzled at the way he so easily distracted her, she blurted out, “No cheating.”
Tarif’s eyes gleamed. “Possessive, aren’t you?”
She pretended not to hear him and instead said firmly, “It’s non-negotiable.”
The sheikh inclined his head in agreement. “Very well. You have my word, anisdi. I hereby solemnly swear that I shall use your body exclusively to slake my insatiable lust.” He saw color sweep over her cheeks, and the sight only made him want to tease her even more. “Morning, noon, and night, I shall make sure to call upon you for all of my sexual needs---” The sheikh smirked when she started squirming in her seat, but his tone was gently solicitous as he asked, “Are you okay?”
“Yes, Your Highness,” Anisah managed to bite out even though they both knew she was not okay. How could she when his words had her all wet and messed up?
“And have I covered everything to your satisfaction? Or would you like me to further elaborate---”
Fearing she’d end up having an orgasm if she heard more of the sheikh’s intentions, she said hastily, “No, thank you, sheikh. I would like to move on to my next condition if I may?” And because his eyes still had that dangerously wicked gleam, she didn’t give him a chance to torment her further and said quickly, “My second condition has to do with the end---”
Tarif couldn’t help but shake his head. “We haven’t even started anything yet, and you’re already considering the end of our relationship?”
Anisah was bemused. “Why would you say something like that?”
And now the sheikh was just as bemused. “Are you saying I’m wrong?”
“You know you are. I would never propose a relationship with you, Your Highness. You are one of the king’s vassals, and I am nowhere as important. Such a relationship would not be proper!”
Tarif’s lips swiftly pressed together to contain his smile. “Let me get this straight, anisdi. It is not proper to have a relationship with me---”
“Naturally!”
“But it is, err, proper to have your fingers wrapped around my cock?”
Anisah turned red, and she stammered, “No, of course not, you know what I---” Oh, curse him! Annoyed at the way he seemed to delight in twisting her words, she decided to surprise him by letting go of his manhood and was rewarded by the sheikh’s groan of disappointment.
He immediately reached for her, but this time she hid both her hands behind her back, and her lips curved in a sweet smile when she saw the grimace on the sheikh’s handsome face. “May I now continue, Your Highness?”
“If I say yes, will it mean having your hand back on my cock?”
“Only when we are done discussing my conditions---” Anisah’s voice was prim. “And you swear to agree to them.”
“Then I don’t have a choice, do I?” Tarif asked dryly. “So go on. You were saying about the end of our, err – how do you wish for us to refer to this if it is not a relationship?”
She shot him a suspicious look – she had a feeling the sheikh was secretly laughing at her – before saying finally, “I believe the term ‘affair’ is more than appropriate.”
“An affair that’s appropriate,” he reflected pensively. “Isn’t that an oxymoron of sorts?”
He had a point, but Anisah decided it was also a point best left ignored, and so she asked quickly, “May we resume, Your Highness?”
“Of course, anisdi.”
His lips twitched as he spoke, but Anisah decided to take the higher road and ignore this as well. “Going back to my previous discussion, Your Highness, I was actually referring to how I would prefer you to end things.”
“You wish to specify the way I should terminate our affair, is that it?”
“Nem, alshaykh.”
“And your preference is?”
“To end it, I only ask that you tell me so privately, and I will accept your decision without question.”
“And if you were the one who wished to end it first?”
“I will show you the same courtesy, of course.”
“Then I agree to your second condition as well.”
“Shukrahn, alshaykh.” And now here came the most difficult part. “As for the last condition – I would just like you to know that this is the most important one for me.”
Tarif’s gaze narrowed. “Go on.” The word ‘money’ came to mind, but he shoved it aside as swiftly as the thought occurred to him. This was Anisah, after all. She could never be so crass, but she could be adorably odd---
“You must promise not to do anything that will make me fall in love with you.”
And he was right.
Tarif stared at Anisah.
Was she serious?
But when the silence continued, he said incredulously, “How do I even---” He saw her start to square her shoulders in a combative stance, and he changed his mind, saying instead, “Alright, I understand.” It was a lie, but he knew it was also the only way to get Anisah to stop scowling at him.
“I mean it, Your Highness. This is non-negotiable---”
“Is falling in love with me that bad?” he couldn’t help asking.
“We both know it is,” Anisah said seriously. “And because you’re more experienced and somewhat irresistible---”
Tarif frowned. “Somewhat irresistible?” he couldn’t help echoing. That rankled a bit, especially since he had a feeling if it were another Al-Atassi sheikh in front of her, she would not have even needed such a qualifier. In her eyes, those damn men could do no wrong, while Tarif could do nothing right.
Anisah ignored the interruption, declaring, “It’s your job to make sure it never happens, sheikh.” And because the sheikh seemed to be taking things too lightly, she added warningly, “I am not joking, Your Highness. I know of women who have literally fallen into depression after you broke up with them.”
