This was crazy, but she hadn’t had near enough. She drank from his mouth. Every kiss was water from heaven on the cracked, dry landscape of her life.
He backed her against the panel and pushed a button, then went back to her mouth. Years fell away, and they were Hank and Charlie sneaking around, stealing long, lingering kisses that would have to last until the next time they could be together. But now, there was nothing to stop his hands from roaming every inch of her body.
Nothing but the couple that got on the elevator at the sixth floor. They broke apart and he covered her body with his. She wiped her wet eyes on his shirt. Emotions roared through her like a locomotive without a conductor. Sanity screamed that this whole thing was pointless. Her life was in a different time zone and might always be. But her reckless heart was riding shotgun in a rocket ship of excitement and desire.
For eight years, everyone from her mother to the guy who ran errands for the production crew had owned a piece of her. She wasn’t a person, she was a meal ticket. But Hank didn’t care if she was a big-shot Hollywood star or Charlie down the block. And she wanted to be wanted like that. Needed it more than her next breath.
Just Charlie.
He’d never use her. He was good and honorable, everything that was missing in her life.
The whole reason she’d been able to play a girl from a small town with a white picket fence and the perfect family was because once upon a time, on a blanket under the stars, they’d dreamed and planned that kind of life for themselves.
Charlie and Hank forever.
Tears clogged in her throat when her mind repeated what they used to say to each other. Words she hadn’t allowed herself to think, let alone speak, since she left Zachsville.
She burrowed into his body and held on tighter as she acknowledged all they had lost. Robbed. She’d been robbed of all the goodness that being with him brought. Her mother not only took her money, but had taken away her chance at love. She was his. She always had been. And he was hers.
They exited the elevator on what she assumed was his floor. He stepped off first and glanced down the hallway, then reached his hand out to her. The warmth of his palm pressed into hers wasn’t enough. Her arm around his arm, she molded herself to his side as they made their way to his room. They leaned into each other, their steps measured and in sync like they’d always been. She tried to OD on his leather and rosewood scent, dragging one delicious breath after another into her lungs, until they stood before his room. Neither spoke, and the silence was its own aphrodisiac.
He slid the keycard into the slot and turned the handle. He didn’t enter but straddled the threshold and held the door open with his hand. He was giving her a chance to walk away because there was no doubt what was about to happen. It was predestined, forever coming, and they both knew it. The moment dangled between them like the gold ring on a merry-go-round. There was no way she was letting this chance pass her by. She’d grab ahold of that prize and hang on for dear life.
To make sure he understood she was all in, she inclined her body against his, pressed an open-mouthed kiss to his throat, then sauntered into the room.
He followed her.
The door closed.
He leaned against it but made no move to come to her. He was going too slow. She knew why, but her body was at the starting line with its engine revving, while it appeared he was still making leisurely laps around the track. That wouldn’t do.
“Charlie, I need to tell—”
“I don’t want to talk, Hank.”
“But you need…”
Her fingers went to the hem of her top. Whatever he was going to say died before it escaped his lips. Fine with her. Words weren’t necessary anyway—his eyes communicated everything he wanted as they hungrily followed the path of her shirt as she slowly slid it up her body and over her head.
He scrubbed his hand over his mouth. “Fuuuck.” The moaned oath made her bold enough to reach behind her and unhook her bra. The lacy cups fell to the ground, and she gave him what she’d wanted to give him since the first time he’d kissed her, when she was fifteen and crazy in love with him.
In some far-off corner of her head, her brain whispered too fast, but she ignored it. Her heart screamed, faster, faster, faster.
“You’re so damn beautiful.” His whispered adoration nearly took her knees out from under her.
She couldn’t help how her lips curled into a smile. “Really?” The sway of her hips was deliberate as she made her way to him and unbuttoned his shirt. “Tell me more.” Cheesy, she knew. It was a line from one of her favorite movies, but it sounded better than I don’t know what I’m doing. She may talk a big talk, but the tremble that ran from the top of her head to her toes told a different story.
Hank was the only man she’d willingly allow to see her this vulnerable. The only other time she’d been intimate with someone was with a boy from the network. Carousel thought a relationship would be good for ratings. Her mother had sanctioned the whole thing, everything but the sex. That had been her idea. A way to make a point. A lot of alcohol and a crapload of regret later, she’d shown her mother that she couldn’t control every aspect of her life. Sad that her first sexual encounter had been a big F-you to her mom.
“Tell you more?” He laughed, picked her up, and threw her on the bed. “I’d rather show you instead.” Her squeal of laughter was cut off when his hot, wet mouth covered hers. His tongue glided over hers, licking like she was the best dessert he’d ever had. She wasn’t much better. With every swipe and taste of him, the cautious side of her slipped farther and farther away, until she was writhing beneath him.
He broke the kiss and pulled back, his warm, minty breath fanning across her face. “Wait. Slow down.” He sat back on his knees. “We need to slow down. There’s something you should know.”
The dilation of his wild green eyes didn’t look like he really wanted to slow down. She slid her fingers over the tops of his hands resting on his thighs. “I know, Hank.”
Three little lines slashed across his brow. “You do?”
“Yes.” She yanked on his shirt and pulled him to her. Her mouth went to his ear and licked the outer rim. Once. Twice. Three times. “I know we’ve always belonged together.” She teased a moan from him when she nipped the skin below the lobe, then smoothed her tongue over the spot. “And now that we are together, it’s so much more than we thought it would be.”
When his lips touched hers this time they were soft and reverent. Each disappointment from the last eight years, each night she’d cried herself to sleep missing him, each dashed hope fell away as he licked and sipped at her mouth then trailed kisses down her neck. “Hank.”
He raised his head and his green eyes pinned her to the bed. “It’s always been you, Charlie. Always.”
She took his face in her hands. “For me too. Charlie and Hank forever.”
For a brief second sadness passed across his handsome face. She knew how he felt. Too much time had been stolen from them. No more.
How will that work?
They’d figure something out. Besides, the only thing that mattered right now was the feel of his mouth and hands as he explored her body. Fire flashed everywhere he touched. It burned away the bad and left promises of hope in its wake.
All rational thought flew out the window when he sat back on his knees. His shirt hung open and his gorgeous chest glowed in the soft light from the small lamp on the desk. She sucked in a breath when his fingers tickled her stomach as he unbuttoned her jeans. The slide of her zipper freed something inside her.
Her hands went to his belt and greediness made her clumsy. His laughter irritated her. “It’s not funny. I want to see all of you. I deserve that.”
The soft kiss he planted between her breasts cooled her irritation. “I promise you can see anything you want, baby. I just need to get you out of these jeans.” His hands went to the waistband of her pants. “Shit.”
“What?”
“I don�
�t have a condom.” He rested his hands on his knees and dropped his head. “Damn it.”
“It’s okay. I’m on the pill.”
He squeezed her legs. “I had to be test—I mean, I was just tested, and I’m clean. But you shouldn’t just assume that, Charlie.”
“Don’t lecture me, Hank.” The fact that he was still protecting her shifted the caustic bands constricting her vocal chords, leaching any annoyance from the words. “I’m a grown woman. I know about safe sex.” Not that she’d had much of a chance to use the knowledge. “And for your information, I’m clean too.” She raised her hips from the bed. “Now get these jeans off me.”
Slow, sexy amusement kicked up one side of his mouth. “Yes, ma’am.” He did as she directed and shimmied her pants and underwear down her legs until he was standing at the foot of the bed.
His raspy breaths filled the room.
What if I don’t measure up to the hype?
Heat burned up her neck to her face and she raised her arm to cover her breasts. He didn’t say anything, just stared, until she couldn’t take it. “I know I’m too thin. I don’t eat when I’m stressed, and I was sick last week.”
“Shut up. Just…shut up.” The emotion in his voice cut off the next words she would’ve uttered. “You’re perfect.”
Her muscles relaxed. She let her arm fall to her side. He still wanted her, imperfections and all. She waved her hand at his jeans. “You have too many clothes on.”
He complied in record time. Beautiful. The word played over and over in her head. He was everything that was beautiful in the world. She lifted her arms. “Come here.” His body over hers was where he belonged. “Make love to me, Hank. Please.”
With the grace of a big cat, he crawled onto the bed to join her. His finger started at the hollow of her neck and slowly made its way down to one breast. Time hung suspended somewhere between heaven and hell while she waited for it to slide over the tip. Round and round he traced, coming close but never giving her what she desperately wanted. With each swipe around he wound her up tighter and tighter, until she teetered on the edge of sanity. He chuckled watching her squirm beneath him. Finally, he brushed across the sensitive tip. An electrical surge burned through her core, obliterating any rational thought. There was only him. She gripped at the sheets and arched her back.
“You like that?”
Words were beyond her. Her response was an exhale followed by a deep throaty moan when he closed his mouth over her nipple and circled the nub with his tongue. Ribbons of pleasure crisscrossed her body, lacing and tying her to this man. She clawed at his back and whimpered as his hand slid between them and found the place that longed for his touch. “Yes.”
“I’ve got you.” He gave her other breast the same attention. All the while he continued teasing pleasure from between her legs. Higher. Higher. Higher. The wave crested, and she was flying.
“Ahhhh.” Where had her ability to speak gone? Who the hell cared? She just wanted more of him, more of this for the rest of her life.
Soft, sweet, kisses brought her back to the here and now.
“Hey.”
The look of triumph in his eyes made her smile. “Hey.”
“You ready for me, baby?”
“Way past ready.” And she was. This should’ve been their reality, would’ve been their life if her mother hadn’t pulled them apart.
He entered her in one smooth motion and the pleasure of it caused sparks to flash behind her closed eyes. Perfect wasn’t a big enough word. He filled her. He covered her. He possessed all her parts, seen and unseen.
“Open your eyes. I want to see you while we’re together.” The tension in his command made it impossible to ignore.
Her lids slowly raised, and she was swept up in the green fire of his eyes.
He thrust, then withdrew, then thrust again, over and over until they both were slick with sweat and she was drunk on him, over the legal limit of pleasure one person could stand. And still she wanted more.
His mouth covered hers in a kiss that made her forget her name. His big hand slid to her calf and he wrapped it around his back. He surged in deeper, thrust harder, coiling her tighter and tighter.
The rhythm changed to a frantic, desperate pace. Never once did he take his eyes off her. Faster they went, until she was sure she couldn’t take the intensity of him. She came undone again with a cry. Unlike the slow winding release from before, the orgasm detonated, ripping her apart and reconfiguring her, changing her very essence.
His hips continued to piston in and out several more times, until he lost himself with her name on his lips. A long, low moan escaped his mouth as he poured himself into her waiting body. “Charlie.”
If eyes were truly the window of the soul, he’d laid his bare. Then the moment passed and he collapsed on her spent body. Happiness washed through her as her hands went to the back of his head when he buried his face in the crook of her neck. It was everything she knew sex should be, but would only ever be with him.
He pulled back and rested his forehead on hers. “Are you alright?”
“Perfect.” She kissed him slow and deep. Making a promise with her lips and sealing it with her tongue.
He rolled to the side, snuggled her to him, and pulled the blanket over them. “I’ve missed you, Charlie.”
“I’ve missed you, Hank. So much.”
“We should talk.” Sleep was thick in his voice.
She ran her fingers over the hand resting on her stomach, then interlaced their fingers. “In the morning.” They did need to talk. She wanted him to know that she was all in, no matter what. “Sleep and dream of me.”
He pulled her closer. “Always.” The whispered word was the last thing she heard before sleep claimed her.
Chapter 3
The morning sun teased open Charlie’s lids. She stretched her well-loved body and remembered that she was in Hank’s bed. Blissful sparks fired through her and, if it were possible, she was happier than she had been last night and more hopeful than she’d been in years.
Hank was singing in the shower. Badly. And it was the most beautiful sound in the world. She gathered the sheet around her and made her way to the bathroom. “Hey, good-looking. You sing real pretty.”
He pulled the curtain back and grinned. “Liar. You’re the one who sings pretty. I sound like a dying goat.”
She shrugged. “True, but I like waking up to it anyway.”
“Why don’t you get in here and show me how much you like it?”
Lust raced through her belly and pooled between her legs. “I’ll do that, but let me call the hospital first and check on Pops. Save me some hot water.”
“No promises, but I’m pretty sure we can make our own heat. Hurry up.”
She laughed and went to find her phone. The call to the hospital was quick with no extra bad news. “I’ll be there later this morning,” she told Pops’ nurse.
“No problem,” the nurse replied. “He’ll be here when you get here.”
“Thanks for taking such good care of him. See you in a bit.” She sat for a moment and enjoyed the happy, hopeful glow she was floating in. Hank’s phone pinged with several messages one right after the other. Dang, she hoped it wasn’t the sheriff’s office calling him back home. She checked the screen in case she needed to pass a message to him, and her empty stomach seized.
On the screen were three messages. The display read, Wife.
Hey baby, it’s me.
Surprise!
I’m in the lobby.
Wife, baby, lobby? The words slammed into her and beat the hell out of her. Her hopeful heart shattered with each vicious blow.
He. Was. Married.
He’d said they needed to talk. Now she knew why. While she’d been planning a future, he’d been married.
“Oh, my…” Her skin burned from the inside out when she thought of all the ridiculous, immature assumptions she’d made. They were nothing but pathetic teenaged romanticizing. She was too
stupid to live.
“Charlie. I’m waiting.”
The words floated through the steam to where she sat, paralyzed. Nauseous bile burned her throat. She’d slept with a married man. Hank was married. Married. Married. Married. The words were on a warped playback loop like the soundtrack from some screwed-up carnival fun house.
Panic drove her to dress in record time but also made her movements uncoordinated and jerky. She ripped the blankets aside and the sheets smelled like sex. Their sex. It smothered the last flicker of hope in her chest. None of it had been real. Hank was just one more person in a long line of people who’d used her for what they wanted. You’d think she’d have learned by now.
She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror above the desk. Devastation etched every curve and hollow of her face. The last vestige of the trusting young girl she’d been before those three texts evaporated before her eyes. Another tear slid down her already wet cheeks. “I’m so stupid.”
“Charlie?”
The urge to run, to flee from him, her miserable life, and most of all her stupid self, burned her gut. Where could she go? With her last speck of dignity, she made her way to the bathroom. “Hank.” The word wobbled and barely stood on its own.
His head popped out of the shower curtain. The expectant smile he wore broke her heart all over again and another tear tumbled over her lashes.
“What’s wrong? Is it Wardell?”
She swallowed twice before she could speak. Years of pretending to be someone else kicked in and she was able to say the words. “Your wife is waiting for you in the lobby.”
The shock on his face told the entire story. She nodded. “So, it’s true. You’re married.” Not a question. She knew by his expression it was true. “The boy I knew would never have done this to me. I guess the man isn’t nearly as honorable as the boy.” Her teeth clamped down on her trembling lip, and she shook her head. “I thought better of you, Hank.” She hefted her bag onto her shoulder. “Tell your wife I said hello.”
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