by Rita Hestand
Chase staggered for a minute then rushed to his side. He pulled her up and into his arms and looked into her lifeless face. "It's over…"
Hawks lay bleeding from his gut wound, he wasn't dead, but he wasn't able to do anything either. Chase looked at him.
"Finish me off," Hawks demanded his eyes wild, his eyelids already waxing. Blood gushed from his wound when he coughed and yelled out from the pain…"Finish me…"
Chase stared down at him. "The Indian in me wants to let you die slowly, Hawks, but the white side wars and says it isn't human to let a man suffer. Are you sure that's what you want, Hawks?"
"Dammit, finish me…"
Chase nodded, and Katherine turned her head away as Chase squeezed the trigger.
Hawks was dead with a bullet to his brain.
Katherine ran into the arms of Chase and cried. "Why did he have to die…?" She was staring at Mathew's body.
Chase comforted her for a long while, holding her close and kissing the top of her head, happy that she was unharmed.
After a while, he buried Mathew by her folks. The old oak tree seemed to support a yard full of graves now, looking more like a cemetery.
"There's a place in the Bible that says there is a time for everything, a time to live and a time to die. Although I don't understand God's reasoning, I accept it now. Take him, Lord, unto your bosom," Katherine said aloud.
"Amen," Chase added.
Under the oak, they slept for a few hours, from exhaustion. It was almost dawn before either stirred. Wrapped safely in Chase's arms, she finally opened her eyes and she stared into his face.
"I have much to tell you…," she whispered.
He smiled down into her face. He wanted her now but as she said there was much to talk of too.
"I will listen…," he said sighing into her arms.
"I don't know where to start," she said slowly. "Years ago, back in Missouri, my father and Hawks supposedly robbed a bank."
"Go on…"
Katherine related the whole story to Chase. Chase listened, nodding his understanding and not at all surprised.
"It all makes sense now."
"Does it?" Katherine seemed to linger on her thoughts. "I couldn't believe such a thing of my father. I mean, he never let on once that anything like that ever happened. It was hard to believe at first. I'm not sure, but I don't think my mother knew…until the end about any of this."
"And now you believe Hawks?" Chase asked.
Katherine nodded slowly. "Yes…now I believe him."
Chase held her head in his lap and pushed the hair from her face as she spoke.
"I didn't want to at first…of course. I couldn't believe it. But then when we got here, Hawks was so sure it was buried on this land…then I realized he must be telling the truth. Why else would he be here?"
Chase nodded silently, stoking her cheek. "He thought you knew where it was…?"
"Yes," she cried breathlessly. "He had me digging all those holes in the ground, but we found nothing. There is no sign of money here…"
"Shh…" Chase smiled down into her face. "It is all right now. It is over…"
"No…" Katherine got to her feet and looked down at him. "It is not over…"
Chase shifted, and stared at her. "What do you mean…?"
"There's more…"
"Okay, go on…tell me…" he encouraged.
"He told me a story. Another story, I could not believe, and yet…I could." Katherine paced back and forth as though putting the puzzle together herself for the first time. "He said long ago, when my father and mother came out to Missouri, they were attacked by Indians, Shawnee Indians."
Chase's face changed to one of concern now.
She glanced down at him then went on, "He said…my mother was captured by the Shawnee and taken away. And that my father searched for her for several weeks. Eventually he caught up to the tribe and he snuck in and found my mother, in a chief's tent. He tried to smuggle her out of the camp, but she didn't want to go. The reason she didn't want to go…"
Katherine stared down into Chase's face now, "Is because the chief had…taken her."
Chase stood up and came towards her.
But Katherine put out her hands, took his, and she looked at them both. She spread her hands against his and saw the color was the same.
"My father…was….that chief…" she uttered the words aloud, as tears fell down her cheeks. "Can it be truth? I look at you and I look at me, and I see little difference."
"Katherine…"
"You knew…." She gasped. "You knew about me before you came, didn't you?"
"Yes…" Chase answered, gathering her hands in his and kissing them. "I was sent by my tribe to bring you back…Katherine…to your people."
She turned away from him. "How could I not know?"
He came to hold her against him. "Out here…many things happen. You and I…we are the result…."
"But how could I not know all those years…?" She cried and turned to look at him.
"How could you know…?" Chase offered.
Tears fell, and as Chase tried to comfort her, she turned away from him. Until he pulled her into the circle of his arms, and kissed her gently. His hands went around her, cupping her breast, and his fingers pressed gently against them, until they were hard nubs. She moaned aloud, and almost sighed into his arms. His lips sought hers hungrily, greedily, as though he already knew them and had every right to claim her. His hands roamed freely over her as though making sure she was all there. His touch was gentle and inviting and for a second Katherine responded in kind, but when his hands reached to pull her hips up against his she jerked free.
She touched her lips that he had swollen with his kisses. "We have been together…in my dreams."
"Yes…" Chase agreed trying to gather her again into his arms, but she pulled away.
"Known each other…?"
"Yes…my sweet…"
She shook her head. "Those were dreams, not reality."
"Perhaps, but we were brought together by one much more powerful than you or I, Katherine. It is right that we are together," Chase assured her.
Katherine faced him now, looking at every inch of him and blushing to her toes.
"You are not my husband and I do not know you…," she said as tears streamed down her face.
"Katherine…." He called but she walked away from him and didn't look back.
"You are mine, Katherine, you will always be mine…" he whispered the words, and wondered why Wos-so mon-nit-to or the Great White God had not blessed this moment of truth.
Chapter Twenty-One
Dawn brought no reprieves. Katherine made herself busy about the station, as though there were things that needed doing. There was nothing. She felt empty inside.
Rejecting Chase proved a hard thing to do, but the way he knew her body frightened her. Never had a man touched her so and to think he was real and alive and wanting more, scared her witless. Although at times she felt herself weakening, wanting him too. His love had been so gentle.
There was no mother to talk to her, explain to her that everything would be all right. What scared her was she knew this man, and he her. And they were not married.
The day wore on, and as Chase had found them food, she prepared it without question. She skinned the rabbits and cooked them as though she had done it many times, but the truth was, she had never done such a thing. The action seemed to come naturally to her. This too scared her. Nothing seemed real any more. She was doing things she had never done before.
When darkness came again, she was afraid he might take her to his bed, and in reflection she almost hoped he would. For she realized with clarity, she wanted him too. But the white man's shame felt heavy on her too. And her mind warred. Was this what it was like to be a breed, to have two different sets of values to deal with all the time?
But he surprised her, he came to sit on what was left of the burnt out porch, and pulled her against him. "Do not be afraid of me, little one…," h
e whispered gently.
"I'm not afraid of you. Only what you do to me when I look at you."
He smiled.
"Hawks said I was part Indian, is it true?" her voice was low, husky.
"Yes…you…you are a breed Katherine," Chase said with a long sigh. "I know it is hard to accept. You grew up thinking differently. But according to Burning Tree…"
"Burning Tree?" she turned her head and his mouth was a mere inch away from hers.
He gasped for a second, tensing himself against the need to be with her once more. "He is the medicine man, the Shaman of our tribe. He says you are the great, great granddaughter of a mighty chief and you have powers you know nothing about."
"And you believed him?" she asked looking into his face.
"Yes…I guess I did. For it was he that sent the dreams to us, Katherine. So that I might find you and bring you back to the tribe," Chase explained.
"But there is no one there that I am kin too?" she questioned.
"No…no one." He seemed to relax, but he loosened his hold of her.
"Then why should I go…?" she questioned.
He shrugged, his hands going down her arms and stretching hers against him. "You do not have to go, but Burning Tree says you will…"
"And you believe him?" she looked into his face.
It was hard being this close to Katherine, knowing her as he did, and not having her. But he steeled himself to his strength. "I believe him…"
"He's wrong; I do not possess special powers. If I did I would have saved my mother…," she said lowly.
"He said you know not of these powers, but they are there, and he will help you find them."
"Why did he…why….were the dreams…so…personal…?" she shuddered.
Chase hated to see her reject what they shared, but he understood her thinking. She had thought like a white so long, that was the only way she could. And he could not fully explain why Burning Tree chose to unite them, only that he did. She was his, whether she knew it, or understood it. And he would protect her to his death.
She turned to stare into his eyes, but he did not reply to this question.
"I must know now, you have not spoken of it…my brother…is he…?"
"Yes," Chase rushed to say before she spoke the words. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I could not save him. When I came back to the cabin, the Captain was lying on the floor, his head bleeding, Lee was shot, and no one else remained but Josh. I went to him, hoping he was better somehow. He was worse. He said he didn't want to die, didn't want to leave you…."
Katherine felt the tears falling on her cheek, but she was not ashamed to shed them, for she had loved Josh maybe more than any of her other siblings. They were so close.
"He was so…young…"
"Katherine," he took her hand in his, his thumb absently caressing the top of her hand. "He wanted you to know…your mother told him about you. But…it didn't matter to Josh. He loved you truly as a brother should. He wanted to live to help you…he didn't want you to be alone."
Katherine couldn't stop the tears now, like long ropes of water coming, slipping down her cheeks. She wept openly, and Chase rose to his feet to take her into his arms again. It felt so right to hold her close and love her so. Strong emotions tied him to this woman.
"I loved him, truly," she whispered against the shoulder Chase offered.
"He knew you did. His last words were of you, Katherine. Nothing speaks more highly of love than that," Chase assured her.
For a long time she sobbed against him, as he held her, combing the long strands of her hair with his fingers. She had been through so much, and still she was strong, and he fed her his strength too, to go on, for he knew it would take much courage to keep going now.
Some time later, Katherine raised her head from his shoulder and backed away a bit. "And Lee and the Captain?"
"They are okay. They might be here soon. They will be out of water soon. They can't last without it. I left them back on the trail after the last dream I had of you."
"You should have listened to me…," she whispered.
"I would not, could not let Hawks kill you, Katherine… Whether you understand me or not, you are bound to me, and me to you. I will always take care of you Katherine…" he pledged and held her close.
She pulled away. "That was only a dream…"
Chase considered her words, and understood. She did not recognize their coming together as a marriage, and she was right, there were no promises, only love which reached beyond promise.
Yet he understood her. She thought like a white, and it would be difficult, even if he did manage to get her back to the tribe to convince her that God Almighty had deemed them as married.
Understanding was one thing, living with that understanding was quite another. He wanted her and she was his, there was no denying it. But she rejected him. So he would have to learn to live with that too. He only hoped that Burning Tree would bring them together again, somehow, and make her see.
Perhaps the night would have been painful but Lee and the Captain appeared out of the darkness. The Captain pulled Lee just as Chase had done, and he was wobbling as he stomped into the camp.
Katherine ran to Lee and immediately started doctoring him. Lee seemed better after much sleep. The Captain was worn to a frazzle, but happy to finally reach the station.
"What happened?" he didn't hesitate to ask even as out of breath as he was.
Chase offered him water. "Mathew Tyler showed up before I came into the station. I convinced him to wait till nightfall and go in. But Hawks had seen us and had the upper hand. He captured me, and Mathew made it to the barn to warn Katherine, but as he came out, Hawks shot him. Thinking him dead, Hawks made the mistake of walking around him. Mathew got off one shot, and killed Hawks. I'm kinda glad it was him that did it. Seems only right," Chase added sadly.
The Captain bowed his head. "All the Tyler boys, killed, by one man. And what was Hawks after?"
Katherine came around to look the Captain in the eye. "It seems he and my father had stolen money from a bank back in Missouri. After the robbery, a deputy was shot and presumably killed. The posse lit out for them. So they separated. Hawks went to Indian Territory, my father came here. Hawks was convinced the money was here, buried in the ground somewhere. We didn't find it, Captain…but I reckon it's here, somewhere."
Chase looked at Katherine then the Captain. "She knew nothing about this, all this hit her like a twister gone bad."
Katherine nodded. "Hawks was full of information I knew nothing about."
"We'll make a full report when we get to the fort," The Captain predicted.
"Am I under arrest, Captain?" Katherine held out her hands.
The Captain cleared his throat. "No…Miss Katherine, I've a few things to look into, but I don't think it will be necessary. Although I won't forget that trick for a long time."
Katherine smiled and the Captain smiled back.
Chase felt his gut wrench as Katherine was almost flirting with the Captain now.
Chase eyed the Captain as Katherine cooked his quick finds in the desert for supper. "You pulled Lee, yourself?"
Lee chuckled. "I told him I could try to walk now, but he insisted."
"I'm not saying I did it as well as you, but we got here…" The Captain laughed now although he was definitely ready to cave in for the night as soon as he ate something.
"You know I'm getting quite accustomed to eating snake now. I almost like it," Lee laughed.
"It kept you strong…" Chase smiled.
"That it did, my friend." Lee laughed.
***
Flames licked the darkness, crackling like a bird as they ate. Katherine watched them all with new eyes. She wished she understood herself, but she didn't. She felt so misplaced, so confused by all the new information.
Thoughts of Josh filtered through her head and she felt the knot in her chest to cry, but she held it tight.
The men talked for hours, and Katherine bade
them goodnight. She found a spot under the old oak tree and made herself a pallet as she had when she was with Hawks. She had one thing here that she wanted, and tomorrow she would hunt for it.
Tears slipped silently down her cheek as she closed her eyes, it had been a long day.
Chapter Twenty Two
"What are they doing?" Katherine shouted when she saw the Captain digging the grave of Mr. Bowlins.
Chase studied Katherine a long moment, and then explained, "The Captain wanted to have another look at the bodies, to clear you of all the charges."
"To clear me…." She looked stunned.
"Yes, he said if he identified the bullets he could clear you of all the charges. It is in your interest that he does this," Chase informed her.
"Then…he won't press charges against me?" She asked tentatively.
"No, he won't." Chase smiled now at her perplexed look.
"So we won't have to stand trial at the fort?" She began to smile.
"You won't," he concluded.
"But…what about you?" she asked, her voice rising with indignation.
"I was scheduled to hang for killing a Sergeant. I'm probably going to hang…" Chase walked away.
But Katherine followed. "But there must be something we can do…"
Chase turned to look at her, "There's nothing, Katherine… The Captain agreed to speak up for me at the trial, about trying to save Lee and then helping to catch Hawks, but I'm already tried and convicted on the other charge, there is nothing he can do…"
Katherine stared at the Captain long and hard, wondering what it would take to convince him to just let Chase go, let him escape. It was worth an effort to try and persuade the Captain to let Chase go.
Slowly she moved towards him. "Captain, Chase told me what you are doing, and I thank you for it."
"I'm a fair man. And it sounds as though you've been through enough for a while. If what I find is the way Chase Rivers said it, then, you are not going to be charged with anything."
"That's more than fair, Captain. I appreciate you taking the time to investigate it. And Lee…?" she asked.
"Lee is still with me, still under my command. There will be no charges under the circumstances," he explained. "The station was burned down as Rivers said, he fought the Indians as he would have had he been with me during the time. I'll not accuse him of desertion."
