“I don’t know. It will depend on what I order.”
The server came with a basket of bread and took their drink orders—chardonnay for Brenda, merlot for him. She promised to take their dinner order when she returned.
“Actually I need to be home by ten,” Cullen said.
“Curfew?” She smiled and arched a brow before she sipped her water.
“Babysitter.”
She choked and then wiped the corners of her mouth with her napkin.
“Excuse me? Did you say babysitter?”
“I did. Although she’s more of a nanny than a babysitter, and the kids would take issue with me saying they were being babysat.”
Brenda leaned forward, her jaw slack. “Whoa. Whoa, back up. Kids. As in plural? Who are old enough to object to being babysat?”
She narrowed her eyes. “Oh, okay. I get it. You’re joking, aren’t you? Very funny, Cullen. You almost had me there.”
“I’m not joking, Brenda.” He raised his right hand. “Honest. I have four kids, ages five to ten, living with me.”
“But they’re not yours,” she said. “You couldn’t have a ten-year-old. We were married then.”
It was a strange feeling the way he wanted to object to her statement that they weren’t his. “Obviously we have a lot of catching up to do,” Brenda said. “Where did these kids come from?”
Cullen picked up his water glass and took a sip. “Do you remember when I introduced you to Greg Thomas, my best friend growing up?”
She looked up from the menu. “Oh, right. He and his wife came to visit right after you and I started dating. They drove that little blue convertible.”
“Yes, he’s the one.”
He told her about Greg’s accident, how he’d promised Megan she could call him if she and her siblings ever needed anything, and how she’d held him to that promise when the adoptive family Greg and Rosa had secured fell through.
“I’m sorry, Cullen. I know Greg was a good friend. That must’ve been difficult for you. But I have to say, four kids? What are you going to do?”
Cullen shook his head. “I’m trying to figure it out, but right now I just don’t see any other choice but to find them a family that will adopt them. I have a family-law attorney working on it. I won’t let them be split up. I refuse to let them get swept up by the foster-care system.”
“You do realize how difficult it will be to keep four kids together? That’s going to be tricky. What are you going to do if you can’t find someone to take them all?”
“I’ll cross that bridge if and when I come to it.”
“Don’t tell me you’re thinking about keeping them, because you need four kids like you need a hole in the head.”
He closed his menu. “Brenda, you haven’t met them. They’re pretty cool. They’re smart and fun. They keep me and Lily on our toes.”
Like yesterday, when he forgot George. Common sense reminded him that there was being challenged, and then there was being in denial. Denial to the point that he was ignoring what was best for the kids.
Then, as if she were reading his mind, she said, “Is Lily the nanny, or is she someone special?”
“She’s very special.”
He surprised himself when the thought morphed into words.
“Oh, I see.” She sounded disappointed. Her gaze searched his eyes, and he could see the wheels in her head turning.
Before he could clarify, she said, “Cullen, you do realize that basically you gave up your right to a normal family life when you took the Hippocratic oath? You’re married to your job. You’d need a live-in nanny if you adopted four kids. So don’t make me come over there and smack some sense into you.”
She smiled at him as if she had just made a joke, but he could tell by her body language that there was at least some grain of seriousness to it. That was the thing about Brenda: she had honed passive aggression into an art form.
Still, her words echoed in his head and gave him pause.
You gave up your right to a normal family life.
“Didn’t you ask me to dinner because you wanted my advice? I seem to remember you saying that.”
“Yes. Yes. I want to know everything you can tell me about working and living in Celebration. But— Look, I didn’t mean to sound like I was telling you what to do. I simply hate to see you make a mistake that might end up leaving these children worse off than they are now.”
They sat in uncomfortable silence for a moment.
And she reached out and put her hand on top of his.
“I’ll be honest. Sometimes I think leaving you was the biggest mistake I ever made in my life,” she said. “The last few months, I found myself thinking about you a lot. About us. Then when I learned of the possibility of the job right here in Celebration, I thought it had to be a sign. And you know me. I don’t believe in signs.”
What? Oh, no. They’d been there, done that, and they’d learned that the two of them were great as friends and colleagues, but terrible as a couple.
“Now that we’re settled in our careers and we’ve both been around the block a bit, maybe we could try again? I mean, we could take things slowly. If I end up taking the job here.”
He suddenly felt a little claustrophobic, as if the walls were closing in. So, this was what she wanted to pick his brain about. Living and working in Celebration with him—a minor detail that she’d forgotten to mention.
“Don’t take the Celebration Pediatrics job for me—or for us. You need to go through with the other interviews you have lined up and not make any decisions until you can compare offers and choose the one that’s best for you.”
She lifted her chin.
“Of course,” she said, but he could see the disappointment in her eyes. “It’s the sensible thing to do. Your saying that is case in point of why we would be so good together. We understand each other so well.”
Funny thing was, Cullen didn’t understand her at all. Never had, never would.
Cullen’s phone rang, and he fished it out of his pocket, wanting to see not only who was calling but the time. His gut tightened when he saw Lily’s name and number on the display.
He stood. “Excuse me. I need to take this.”
He answered as he walked toward the restrooms.
“Hi, Lily. Is everything okay?”
“Hi. I’m so sorry to bother you, but Bridget is running a fever. I brought her and the kids home early from the holiday market because she was just feeling lousy. I was going to wait until you got home to ask you about ibuprofen, but there’s no need for her to suffer like this when I can just give you a quick call.”
“You did the right thing. How high is her fever?”
Lily told him and Cullen gave her instructions and said he would be home as soon as he could.
“I’m so sorry to ruin your night. You really don’t have to come home now. I’m sure she’ll be fine.”
“It’s okay. We were just wrapping things up anyway.”
He took care of the check before he returned to the table, wanting to avoid an awkward struggle over Brenda’s insistence on splitting the bill.
Once he got back to the table, he said, “I’m so sorry to do this, but I have to go. That was Lily, and one of the girls is sick. I really should go and check in on her.”
Something flashed in Brenda’s eyes.
“Since we’ll virtually pass your house on the way to my hotel, why don’t I go with you and look in on the child? After all, I am a pediatrician. Usually I don’t make house calls, but for you I’ll make an exception.”
Chapter Eleven
Lily was surprised that Cullen had been so eager to come home. She had warred with herself over whether to call but finally gave in to good sense.
This was about Bridget,
not about them. Her concern was for the girl. If he wanted to take it upon himself to come home, that was his decision.
As she sat in the chair next to Bridget’s bed, she refused to let herself be nervous about seeing him. She also refused to let her mind wander over the reasons that he might have been willing to cut this date short. Sure, she had told him she needed to leave by ten o’clock, but she hadn’t expected him to sound eager to be home early.
When she heard footsteps in the hallway she decided to stay seated.
Bridget was dozing, the ibuprofen finally kicking in, and the children were in the family room watching television. George and Hannah hadn’t balked when Lily put Megan in charge. Of course, the big bowl of popcorn and the movie of their choice put them in a cooperative mood, but they’d also been subdued by the fact that their sister was under the weather.
After they’d lost their parents, it had to be scary when anything was wrong with one of the four of them. How Lily wished she could promise them with 100 percent certainty that everything from this point out would be okay. But she couldn’t read the future. It broke her heart, but she had no idea where the sweet kids would end up after the first of the year. The only thing she could do now was to be there for them and give them the best Christmas they could hope for.
When Cullen entered the room, Lily was ready to apologize again for taking him away from his dinner, but then she realized he wasn’t alone.
Her heart plummeted when she saw the beautiful woman at his side. She knew it was Brenda before the woman introduced yourself.
“You must be Lily. I’ve heard so much about you.”
Maybe Lily was imagining it, but Brenda’s smile didn’t seem completely sincere. It made Lily wonder—had they been talking about her?
Reruns of yesterday’s conversation with Cullen played through her head. While she didn’t think he was the type to talk badly about someone, she couldn’t help worrying about what he might have told Brenda. Still, since she didn’t have any control over that, she couldn’t let herself focus on it.
If she tallied up all of her inadequacies—because Josh had given her a laundry list of every single one of her shortcomings when he broke up with her and they were still very fresh in her mind—she could very well let them get the best of her.
She wasn’t going to do that. So what if Brenda was intimidatingly beautiful and a doctor to boot? Lily was who she was and she wasn’t going to make any apologies for that.
“You must be Brenda.” Lily mustered her most genuine smile. “It’s so nice to meet you.”
“Brenda is a pediatrician,” Cullen said. “She’s going to look in on Bridget.”
“That’s wonderful of you,” she said. Although, she hated for her to wake up Bridget. There was no telling how long it would take the girl to get back to sleep. But Brenda was the pediatrician. She knew what was best. With a heavy heart for the sick girl and, yes, she had to admit, a little for herself, too, Lily knew it would be best to say good-night.
“Now that I know Bridget’s in good hands, I’ll say good-night and go home. Cullen, why don’t I take Megan, George and Hannah home with me? You’ll have your hands full with Bridget tonight.”
And if Dr. Perfect decided to stay the night—to look in on the sick girl, of course—it would definitely be a full house with all of them there. Lily just hoped to God that the woman was gone before she dropped the kids off in the morning.
Or would she be dropping them off in the morning? Things had been so hectic and strange that she and Cullen hadn’t even had a chance to discuss the weekend schedule. Maybe he was expecting her to take the kids to the holiday market. She planned on being there to help out anyway. She might as well take the kids directly there.
Great. And leave the day wide-open with the two to rekindle the romance. Of course, someone would need to stay with the sick girl—
“I can’t ask you to do that,” he said. “You’ve already had a long day.”
Brenda threw them a look over her shoulder as she was checking Bridget’s vitals.
“Let’s go out in the hall so that we don’t disturb Brenda,” Lily suggested.
Cullen shut the bedroom door behind him and the two of them were alone in the hall. Lily could hear the faint sound of the movie the kids were watching. One of the girls, probably Hannah, giggled at something funny. Lily wished she were down there with them. Actually she wished she were any place other than where she was right now—standing face-to-face with this man who had broken her heart.
“You seem upset,” Cullen said.
Well, yes...
“I’m just worried about Bridget. Like you said, it’s been a long day.”
“Please stay,” he said. His face looked anguished.
Lily blinked. Just a moment ago he had been acknowledging how tired she must be. Now he was asking her to stay?
Her chest felt tight and her words were having a hard time getting past the lump in her throat. Oh, dear God, please let her keep her composure. The last thing she needed to do right now was lose it in front of this man who had made her place in his life perfectly clear yesterday. What made it even worse was that his ex-wife was in the next room.
No. Just no.
He’d set his boundaries yesterday. Tonight she would set hers.
“Cullen, I’m happy for the kids to come home with me, but I need to leave. I’m going to go tell them to get their stuff ready. Maybe Brenda will stay and help you with Bridget.”
She turned toward the stairs.
“She’s going to be leaving in a few minutes. Please stay.... I need you.”
Lily paused at the top of the stairs. She turned and looked at him. The way he was looking at her made her want to believe he really did need her. But she had to keep it in context. He had made himself perfectly clear yesterday.
Still, she couldn’t stop herself from saying, “Don’t. Cullen, please. Don’t.”
“I made a mistake yesterday.”
Oh, no. She felt the tears welling in her eyes. She reached up to swipe them away before they could take on a life of their own. “How was your date?”
“Let’s just say that it was a dinner between old friends.”
Lily gave him a look.
“That’s all we are. All she and I will ever be.”
A hiccuping sob escaped Lily as a tear crested and rolled down her cheek. Cullen reached up and brushed it away.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m so sorry.”
Brenda cleared her throat. She was standing in the hallway watching them. “Well, it appears to be a virus. She should be fine in a day or so. I think my work here is done. I guess I’ll go wash my hands.”
* * *
“Brenda, please let me drive you back to your hotel,” Cullen said as he and his ex-wife stood face-to-face in the upstairs hall. Before Brenda had emerged from the bathroom after washing her hands, Lily had excused herself to go downstairs with the other three kids. Bridget was sound asleep and they were both visibly relieved that her prognosis was good.
“Don’t be ridiculous.” Her voice was eerily calm. “I’ve already called a cab. It should be here any minute. But please do come wait with me outside until it arrives.”
It was the least he could do. He wasn’t going to let her stand out there alone or awkwardly in the foyer waiting for her ride.
She buttoned up her coat and twisted her scarf into place. Cullen shrugged into his jacket and they stepped into the cold night air.
They stood a respectable distance apart and were silent for a moment. He could virtually hear the wheels turning in her mind.
“Lily is a beautiful woman. She seems to genuinely care for the children.”
“She’s a second-grade teacher. She’s great with kids. I was lucky to find her.”
Bre
nda made a skeptical noise, half laugh, half derision.
“To care for the children, I mean,” he clarified.
Brenda sighed and gave a dismissive wave of her hand. “Some women are cut out for motherhood. I’m not. That’s just how I’m wired. I can deal with sick children, but I’m always happy to give them back to the parents.”
Cullen shoved his hands deeper into his coat pockets. It was so cold he wouldn’t be surprised if it snowed tonight. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Sure. Ask me anything.”
There was a note of resignation in her voice, as if she were willing to play along but didn’t expect much.
“Why did you become a pediatrician if you’re not fond of children? Never could figure that out about you.”
She snorted. “One of the many mysteries of me. Let me say this—I don’t think it’s strange that you don’t necessarily want to live with your patients.”
“Touché.”
The cab pulled into the driveway. Brenda paused before she got into the car. “You know she’s in love with you. It’s written all over her face. I think you’re in love with her, too. Am I right?”
“Good night, Brenda,” he said.
She laughed again, though it sounded humorless. “Goodbye, Cullen.”
He stood there for a moment watching the cab’s taillights grow smaller as it carried her away. As the car disappeared into the night, he felt a weight that he hadn’t even realized he’d been carrying vanish with it.
When he got back inside, Lily was in the kitchen finishing up what he guessed were the dinner dishes.
“It’s late,” he said. “Don’t worry about those.”
“I only have a few more left to do. It’s not a problem, really. I got the kids to bed while you were outside.”
He walked over and turned off the water she had running in the sink to rinse the dishes. She looked up at him, a startled expression on her beautiful face.
He looked at her, searched every inch of her face, needing to verify what Brenda saw. He needed to see it for himself, because he knew what he was feeling. He was in love with Lily Palmer, despite how he’d tried to drive her away, hoping that she would take the strange feeling that had been growing in him with her when she went.
Harlequin Special Edition November 2014 - Box Set 2 of 2: The Maverick's Thanksgiving BabyA Celebration ChristmasDr. Daddy's Perfect Christmas Page 35
