by Jenny Allen
Lilith melted into him, completely lost as his passionate kiss burned everything else away. She wrapped her arms around his neck, fingers twining into his silky hair. His low moan seemed to bring her entire body to life, awakening every single inch in breathless passion. She softly caught his bottom lip between her teeth and flicked her tongue against it in a languid motion that made his heart beat even faster. She could feel it thundering in his chest, beating in time with hers.
In blind, instinctual motion she slid around, draping one leg on either side of him, facing him in his lap. His strong hands massaged up her back, pulling her tight against him. She caressed her palms over his cheeks, reveling in the feel of his skin and the soft stubble that tickled her fingers. The kisses turned deeper as her lips nudged against his. Her head was spinning, completely lost in sensations, breathing in the rich scent that was Chance. He was bright, warm, delicious and filled with so much passion. The darkness and horror of her nightmares didn’t stand a chance against him, against this. She wanted more, needed more, to drive away all the evil things tormenting her.
When his tongue caressed hers it coaxed a low moan from her lips. Chance pulled back gasping and pressed his forehead against hers. His chest heaved with every pant and she could feel his body tremble.
“I can’t.” He whispered. There was a paralyzing moment that threatened to stop her heart before he continued. “God, I want to.” His eyes opened and if she couldn’t hear the raw need and desire in his voice, she could see it plain as day in his eyes. His fingers trailed feather soft against her neck, up to cradle her cheek. She leaned into his touch with a spark that lit her body on fire and made her head swim. His breath came out in a rush, caressing her lips. “Not like this.” He swallowed hard and fought to keep from shaking. “Not when you’ve been through so much.” He sighed again, like he couldn’t believe he was saying all this. “I…I want you to be sure. I don’t want this if it’s just to make the bad things go away.” His cheeks burned red and his eyes looked past her, unable to hold her questioning gaze. “I would do almost anything for you, but not this. If it’s not real it would just hurt us both.”
Reluctantly he pulled himself away and she felt all the warmth leave with him. It left her shivering on the floor, feeling lost and uncertain. She was torn between anger, frustration and sadness. She would never use him. That’s what he was saying, that she was using him to make herself feel better. Her fingers curled into fists and her wounded finger flared pain right up her arm that made her yelp. With the pain came clarity. He was right. Her chest tightened in shame. It didn’t matter how much she cared about him or wanted him, right now it would only be about chasing away the demons in her head.
Lilith drew her knees in tight and wrapped her arms around them as tears rolled down her cheeks. She didn’t even know what to feel anymore, it was like she felt all of it at once, all the anger, pain, horror, shame, need, all of it. Chance found his feet and steadied his knees before leaning down and scooping her up into his arms. Very gently, he placed her in the bed and stared longingly at her as he brushed her hair back with his fingers.
Lilith caught his hand and slid her fingers between his. “Don’t leave.” She could feel the tears stinging at her eyes again, the tightness in her chest stealing her breath as her voice croaked out in a whisper. “You’re right. We shouldn’t. Not now. But please… just stay. I…I just can’t be alone.” There was a desperate pleading in her voice that brought tears to his eyes.
Chance didn’t say anything else. He simply nodded his head and slipped into the bed next to her. She snuggled into his chest as his arms wrapped around her, shielding her from the night. He rested his cheek against her hair and she listened to his heart beginning to slow. Within minutes the tension leaked from her body and darkness pulled her under, the blissful darkness of dreamless sleep.
Chapter 10
Lilith opened her eyes to sunlight filtering through the blinds. Dust bunnies glinted in the streams of light, slowly floating to the floor. She blinked lazily and her eyes felt impossibly heavy. Her brain slowly started to wake up and she realized that she wasn’t alone. A chill ran down her spine until she caught sight of the tanned hand draped over her hip. A smile curled her lips and the chill melted away as she soaked in the warmth of Chance’s body against her back. His breath was slow and steady, tickling against her neck.
Careful inch by careful inch she slipped out of Chance’s embrace. When only his hand on her hip remained, she twisted to peek at his face. He was sound asleep, dreaming. The beautiful line of his mouth was quirked up in a smile and his eyes were moving rapidly behind his lids. She didn’t want to wake him, especially from a good dream. She, of all people, knew how rare really good dreams were. Last night’s nightmare may have been the worst, but it definitely wasn’t her first. It was something that regularly plagued her dreamtime ever since college.
Most people assumed that it was just something that came with the job, but the truth was it had started long before she landed her job in forensics. It went all the way back to her college days at UCLA. The thought flickered through her mind, that horrible morning and she pushed it away. Today she had other things to worry about.
Lilith slid her hand under Chance’s and very slowly lowered it to the bed. With one last lingering look at his chiseled face, she slipped off the bed and tip toed to the bathroom.
When she saw the mirror, she suddenly wished she’d stayed in bed. The lavender t-shirt was longer than most, but still only came to her hips. Smooth lavender boy cut panties were the only other thing she’d been wearing last night. For some reason she felt more mortified about that than Chance breaking down the door to save her from nightmares.
Lilith closed the bathroom door and leaned against the counter. She felt exhausted and used up. She’d cried more in the last 72 hours than she had since her mother died. Not to mention the head injury and the increasing feelings of dread and gloom. Her hair was a matted, frizzy mess of flaming curls and the circles under her eyes were so dark that they looked like black eyes. Her skin was frightfully pale and her clothes felt itchy.
She stripped out of them and leapt into a hot shower, scrubbing away all the grime as fast as she could. Once her hair was clean from two rounds of shampoo and conditioner, she stepped out of the shower feeling a million times better. She wrapped herself in a nice fluffy towel and when she cleared the fogged over the mirror, even the dark circles under her eyes looked lighter.
After a little bit of makeup and the use of Miriah’s hair dryer, she looked like her old self again. Lilith bit her lip softly as she slowly cracked the bathroom door open. Chance was still passed out in the same position on the bed with the sheets twisted around him. She leaned in the doorway, holding her towel tight around her, and smiled softly.
Her entire world had changed in the past few days, most of it for the worse. The people in her life that she thought she knew were revealing themselves to be completely different, shaking her faith in family. Chance was a bright spot. She’d had such a crush on him when she was younger, but he never seemed to really see her. She was around him all the time, but it was always in the shadow of her father. She’d never even known his last name until Gregor gave her the plane tickets. In a way, she’d never really seen him.
When she was a teen she’d been twitterpated by the idea of Chance, not the reality. As she leaned against the door frame, watching him sleep, she wished she’d taken the time to get to know him. She thought back to his apartment and how shocked she’d been. Now, after the past few days, she saw how well the apartment fit him. He felt isolated, alone, separated from the life he wanted, but he didn’t have to be. That was the sad part of it. What if he’d told her back then? Back when Gregor brought down the hammer?
With a sigh she realized that it wouldn’t have been more than a teenage romance, doomed from the start. Maybe Gregor was right, even if his motivations were wrong. She was never interested in really knowing about Chance when she was a k
id. It just wouldn’t have been the same. Perhaps he wouldn’t be as compassionate as he was now if things had gone differently.
All the complicated philosophy made her brain ache. She pushed away from the door frame and quietly grabbed her small suitcase, before tip toeing into the living room. After rummaging through her clothes, she picked out a pair of jeans that hugged every curve, a dark green fitted blouse and a pair of tan strappy heels.
Once she was dressed, she searched the kitchen for something to make for breakfast. It looked like Miriah and Malachi never ate at home. There were a few odds and ends like canned olives, mayonnaise, a stick of butter and can of tomato paste. No matter how creative she was, that was never going to be appetizing. She remembered seeing a little coffee shop on the corner across from the apartment building. She wrote a quick note and left it on the dining room table, just in case Chance woke up while she was gone.
After grabbing her wallet from her case and Miriah’s keys, she quietly slipped out of the apartment. She made it down the stairs without seeing anyone and stepped out into the morning sunshine. It was a gorgeous day with brilliant blue skies and only a faint chill in the air. It was still early morning and carloads of people were bustling about on their way to work. She made her way up to the crosswalk at the light instead of taking her chances with the hectic traffic.
When she finally made her way across, Lilith popped into the quaint little coffee shop. Nearly twenty minutes later she finally emerged with a bag of croissants and two coffees. It was a mom and pop little bistro that baked everything fresh, which was a bit of a change from the corporate chains that choked out the competition in most towns.
Lilith was crossing the busy street again when she spotted Ida shuffling toward the front door of the apartment with an armload of groceries. Lilith jogged down the sidewalk and up the stairs, grabbing the door and unlocking it before Ida made it to the top. She swung the door open and smiled at the elderly neighbor.
Ida looked up in surprise and her weathered face curved into a smile. “Oh, thank you, sweetie.” She shuffled through the door and waited for Lilith. They both started up the stairs and Ida smiled at her again. “It was Lily, right? David’s fiancée?”
Lilith nodded. It suddenly occurred to her that the police would almost certainly question the neighbors. If they were caught giving false names, it would look suspicious. “Actually his name is Chance, David is his middle name. He always thought his first name sounded too…hippy.”
Ida let out one of those polite old lady laughs that you are never quite certain is because you said something funny or something stupid. “Are you two staying with Miriah and Malachi?”
“For a couple of days. Miriah sent us the key, but I haven’t seen her or Malachi yet. We’re actually a little concerned.”
“Oh dear.” Ida’s face darkened as they started up the second set of stairs. “I haven’t seen either of them since…” She paused to think. “Well, it was on my way out to meet my granddaughter at the theatre, so four nights ago, Monday night? They were in quite a hurry, so we didn’t really chat.”
Monday night, so the night before their flight from New York to Knoxville. She wondered when and how Malachi wound up in New York. The timeline still didn’t make much sense. There was far too much they still didn’t know, especially with the possibility of two killers out there.
“Do you have enough space for sleeping arrangements?” When Lilith looked confused, Ida decided to clarify. “Spencer? Well I saw him, when was it, late Wednesday morning. He had a suitcase with him, so I assumed he was staying there as well.”
Lilith forced a smile. “We actually haven’t heard from him since last night. He was checking into some things for Malachi. Are you quite sure it was this Wednesday?” If Ida was correct, that meant he was carrying a suitcase into Miriah’s apartment just before meeting them down at the Madisonville house. Why didn’t he tell them about it and what could be so important? Maybe he was dropping something off for Miriah after chasing down those leads, but then why had he said he hadn’t been to the apartment here in weeks?
Ida paused at her door. “Oh I’m quite sure, dear. Wednesday afternoons I have a class at the senior center. I was on my way there when I saw Spencer.” Her lips curled and the edge of her nose scrunched. It was subtle and lightning fast, but definitely a show of contempt. Her face brightened in a crinkling smile suddenly, like changing a channel. “Well thank you, dear, for walking an old woman to her door. I do hope you hear from Miriah and Malachi. They are such lovely people and they’ve been through so much.”
Lilith was turning toward the apartment door when that stopped her in her tracks. “I’m sorry?”
Ida’s eyebrows soared. “You didn’t know, dear? Oh…well I suppose they might have been too embarrassed to say anything to the family.”
Lilith stepped closer, the little hairs on her neck standing on end. “Embarrassed by what?”
“Well the tests. Miriah, she found out a year or two ago that she was unable to have children, bless her heart. The poor darling was really upset about it. Then, last week, they found out Malachi was sick. She wasn’t specific, but I got the impression it was something very serious.”
She hadn’t heard about any of this and she wondered if anyone besides Ida knew about it at all. It wasn’t the kind of secret that Gregor would keep from her. Or was it? She really didn’t know anymore. He’d already kept things, important things from her.
“You’re sure? Malachi is a pretty healthy guy.” One thing that was true for the most part is the fact that diseases don’t affect vampires. They’re immune systems are extremely healthy, so for a disease, a serious one, to take hold in a fairly strong bloodline like Malachi’s was completely unheard of. Malachi came from a family in Austria that was almost as pure as Lilith’s. He definitely wouldn’t be susceptible to any disease she knew of. Maybe she could get Alvarez to get a blood sample from Malachi and drop it by the lab there in New York.
Ida was trying to balance her groceries and get her door unlocked without much success. “I’m quite sure. Miriah was distraught and she seemed to think it was someone’s fault. Oh, she didn’t say that of course. I can just tell. The way she sounded so angry, as if there was an actual person to blame.”
She’d have to look into that. It may have nothing to do with their immediate problems, but if Ida was right, it was a very big threat. “Well, I won’t tell Miriah you told me. Here let me take those.” Lilith smiled sweetly at the old woman and grabbed a bag of groceries so Ida could unlock her door. “If Miriah chooses to confide in me, I promise I will act surprised.”
Ida took her other bag from Lilith and set them both inside the door. When she turned back, her wrinkled cheeks spread in a smile and she patted Lilith’s cheek. “You are a dear, sweet woman. That boy is a lucky man indeed. You will be a wonderful wife.”
Lilith stood there in a surprised, humorous shock as Ida shuffled inside and closed her door. She turned and unlocked Miriah’s door with an amused little smirk that pushed all the problems and gloom to the back burner. As soon as she had the door open, she pushed out of her heels and tip toed toward the bedroom with the coffees and croissants.
Chance hadn’t moved a muscle and was apparently still dreaming if the smile on his face said anything. She crept around the bed and very slowly sat down on the edge. She placed the cups and the bag of buttery goodness on the nightstand and leaned over to brush a stray strand of hair away from his face.
Chance snatched her wrist with a lightening-speed that actually scared a yelp out of her. His drowsy eyes slowly opened and seemed to eventually register her face and the fact that he had an iron grip on her wrist. “Shit, sorry.” He pulled her wrist to his lips with a lazy smile and pressed a kiss against the back of her hand. “I’m not used to people waking me up.”
Lilith crooked an eyebrow and chuckled. “Don’t let them stay the night, huh?” Her smile faltered just a tiny bit and she pulled her arm back. “On second thou
ght, don’t answer that. TMI.”
A wide yawn cut off any response he was going to make and left him blinking. “Did you sleep at all?” He asked finally.
“Yes, and thankfully, dreamless.” Lilith twisted behind her to grab the coffees and the bag of croissants. “And I got breakfast.” She flashed a bright smile and took a long sip of her overly sweet coffee.
Chance didn’t smile. He stared at the cup of coffee in his hand and then the steely stare turned on her. “I hope they delivered.” Lilith took another deep sip, stalling. Chance just closed his eyes and breathed a heavy sigh. “Do not tell me you actually left the apartment by yourself.”
Lilith sat a little straighter, her jaw clenching just a touch. “Fine. I won’t tell you.” She pointedly dug into the bag and wrestled out a huge flakey croissant.
“Don’t be a smartass, Lily.” He kept staring at her while she took a huge bite.
When she finally swallowed it down, and it was absolutely delicious by the way, she stared right back at him. “It’s just across the street. I had my pepper spray in my pocket. I think I can handle grabbing breakfast without an armed escort.”
“Yeah I bet Miriah felt the same way.” As soon as he said it she saw regret flash across his face, plain as day. She wanted to be angry but she knew he’d be harder on himself for the callous comment than she ever could be. Still, logic or no, her feelings were hurt.
“You’re welcome, for breakfast.” Lilith rose from the bed, coffee and half eaten flaky delight in hand, and sauntered toward the living room. “When you’re finished being an ass and then feeling bad about it, maybe we can talk over some things in the dining room.” She didn’t look at him, just walked out the door. The bottom line was she’d tried to do something nice and gotten her ass chewed for it. No matter how right Chance was, it still hurt. Logic doesn’t solve everything.
