by PE Kavanagh
Ramona shook her head. “Oh, no. Not that. He knows better than to ask, I think. It’s all happened too fast, as it is. And then there’s the lingering scandal with his fake wedding.”
Ramona’s hand flew up to her mouth. Shit. Giddy on honesty, she’d forgotten where the lines were. “I wasn’t supposed to say that.”
Camille bit her lip. “And I’m not supposed to know. But I do.”
“Jackson?”
“Yeah. They talked about it during the move. Jackson swore me to secrecy, so you’re not the only one who wasn’t supposed to say anything.”
Instead of worry, Ramona was filled with relief. She hadn’t realized how difficult keeping everything bottled up had been. And how good it would feel to let it all out.
“Did something else happen with Abigail?”
Ramona considered how much to divulge. Best to tread carefully. “She started calling me. Claiming that I was getting in the way of her being with Lucas.”
“Holy shit! Did she threaten you?”
“Not directly, no. She made some claims about damaging information about someone in the family, but mostly she was trying to convince me that Lucas was lying to me. That our relationship was just a continuation of the scam.”
Camille scrunched up her face. “That’s really frightening, Mo. What did you do?”
“I ignored her, and she stopped. Then my dad got sick and it didn’t matter.”
“Did that cause any trouble with Lucas?”
“Yes. I was angry. The whole situation was so ridiculous, it was hard for me to understand how he could have gotten involved in the first place. It’s taken a while for me to feel comfortable… to trust him.”
Camille kept shaking her head as if the thoughts wouldn’t settle enough to make sense. “You’re not kidding about having a lot going on.”
Ramona wanted to add that there was still more, but held back. It would be impossible to explain all the issues with Connor.
Camille sat back on the couch with a sigh. Ramona gave her a minute to process. “Can I get you something now?”
“Coffee would be great if you have it. Otherwise a glass of water.”
Ramona smirked. “Our coffee machine could launch a space shuttle. Come look.”
She grabbed Camille’s hand and led her into the kitchen.
* * *
The glint of an enormous diamond nearly blinded Ramona as Camille took a sip of her espresso.
“Cam! Oh, my God. I completely forgot to congratulate you on your engagement.”
Camille put down her cup and looked down at her hand. She failed at holding back a huge smile. “Thanks. It’s been, well, Jackson’s been like my fairy tale. He proposed the day we moved back into the house. It was a complete disaster, boxes everywhere, a layer of construction dust that would take days to clean. I mean, not some exotic setting. But it was the most romantic thing that’s ever happened to me.” She beamed at the ring again. “Sometimes, I still can’t believe it.”
Ramona swallowed, the tiniest hint of envy bubbling up from her empty stomach. “You two are perfect for each other. If you’ve been able to tolerate Jackson for all these years, I think you have an amazing future ahead.”
They shared a laugh. “You know, even though we were best friends for so many years, it’s different now. More pressure, which I didn’t expect. Before, I was able to mostly stay hidden, away from his celebrity life, but now it’s me on his arm, with all the cameras flashing. There was a time when I started to feel myself disappear, like all my work and my dreams would just be consumed by his bigger ones. It’s hard to go from a woman who’s basically taken care of herself to the one who only matters in relation to someone or something else.”
Ramona dropped her glass, which surprisingly, didn’t spill. It made no sense that her jumble of emotions had just been summed up more eloquently than she ever could. “How did you manage?”
“It’s a constant dance to get everyone’s needs met. When they conflict, we work it out. Jackson has always made it clear that I come first. I think that’s what makes it work.”
Unbelievable that the exact person who had experience with the issue she’d just had with Lucas was sitting in her living room. “How about if something that would be amazing for him would be terrible for the relationship? What do you do?”
Camille lifted her cup, then put it down. “We haven’t had to deal with that, thankfully. I’m not sure what would happen. But I know that when I decided to work with you on the children’s center, he started turning down clients on the west coast and trying to build more of a base around here. He wanted to make it easier for me to come here as much as I could and for him to come with me.”
This type of relationship was incomprehensible. Not two people having to compromise what they wanted for the sake of a relationship, but two people wanting the best for each other. Trippy.
“You look confused, Mo.” Camille’s sweet face held back a smirk.
“Oh, Cam, I’m way out of my depth here. From free and single to shacking up and family.” That word was so loaded, it made her voice crack. “I haven’t felt this incompetent… ever.”
The doorbell startled her out of the next thought. It was probably a package delivery service.
Ramona opened the door and froze. The petite woman who’d been filling her thoughts was standing in her doorway, complete with silver-streaked hair and eyes the color of night.
“Mom…”
Chapter Nineteen
Doctor Cecilia di Falco Barrett hadn’t aged one bit. Her skin was a bit more tanned, her frame a bit more slight, but otherwise, she looked almost exactly like the woman Ramona had last seen five years before.
“Cariña, are you going to invite me in?”
Ramona nearly tripped over her own feet moving out of the way to let her mother in. “Mom, what are you doing here?”
Cecilia put down her bags and took her daughter’s face into her hands. With a kiss on each cheek, then on the tip of her nose, their special greeting was complete. Something they’d shared since before her mother had enough with civilization and ran to the Amazon. “You are looking too thin, Ramona. I can see all your bones.”
Ramona ran a hand over her belly, then felt self-conscious and dropped it to her side. “Mom, why are you here? Is everything alright?”
Cecilia walked a slow circle around the room, looking, touching, making small noises of approval. Ramona was about to blow when her mother finally decided to speak.
“I tried to get here for your father’s funeral, but I couldn’t extract myself quickly enough.” She picked up a small wooden carving of a meditating monk. “I came to see you, of course. Connor told me you’ve been having a hard time.”
“Connor? You talked to Connor?”
Cecilia’s brows drew together. “Of course, dear. I talk to both of you. He is in a meeting right now, so he told me to come here. I think he will be along later.”
Ramona could not get a grasp on her scrambles thoughts.
Cecilia peered toward the entrance to the kitchen. “Oh, hello!”
Camille had stepped into the room, eyes darting from one of them to the other.
“Cam, this is my mother, Cecilia.”
The two women embraced while Ramona tried to figure out what was happening.
“Nice to meet you, Camille,” said Cecilia.
“And you.”
“You remember Jackson, Mom? Lucas’ cousin? Camille is his fiancée.”
Cecilia’s face lit up. “Oh, wonderful! Congratulations.” She turned her attention to her daughter. “It seems all you young people are settling down.”
This was too much. “What can I get for you, Mom?”
“It has taken nearly three days to get here, so I would love to lie down for a bit.”
“Of course. Let me take you to the guest room.” Ramona picked up her mother’s bags and headed down the hallway.
* * *
When Ramona returned, Camille hadn�
�t moved. She might have not even blinked.
“Uh… were you expecting your mother?”
“Ha! One never expects my mother. She comes and goes as she pleases.” Her appearance, at this time, with everything going on, felt more than coincidental. And frankly, unwanted. There wasn’t a single thing about Ramona’s new life that her mother would approve of. Or agree with.
Camille crossed her arms. “Maybe I should go.” Her eyes flitted down the hallway. “So you can have some time with your mother.”
Time with her mother was the last thing Ramona wanted. “No, please stay. It’s been so nice having you here. She’ll probably sleep for a while. And I clearly need to be picking your brain about how to not ruin a relationship.”
Camille laughed, then caught herself. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be so loud. Anyhow, I’m not sure why you’re worried about your relationship, Mo. You and Lucas are so well suited, and clearly in love. I imagine it all feels too fast, especially since something like this is new to you, but trust yourself. Trust that you’re going to do what’s best for you and your family.”
Ramona’s eyes dampened. Don’t start crying, Ramona. Again. “You are amazing, Cam. Why didn’t I meet you years ago? Maybe I wouldn’t be so relationship stunted.”
Camille hooked her arm through Ramona’s and walked them back to the couch. “Don’t forget what a smart, strong, capable woman you are. You got this.”
With a high five that felt great and ridiculous in equal parts, Ramona settled back and smiled.
* * *
After an afternoon of laughing, planning, and even eating a bit, Ramona found herself in an silent house once again. Camille had headed off to meet Jackson and Mom was still sleeping. Might as well see if she could sneak in a little nap.
Sleep did not last long, as Ramona’s thoughts filled with all the dangling threads around her. It was time for serious list-making. There was Lucas and his Dubai offer. There was Connor and his run for Senate. There was Abigail, whose sudden silence had begun feeling less and less settled. And there was her mother, whose reproach was imminent.
Each would require their own set of options and tasks. There had to be a logical way to handle all of this, while still managing the children’s center project, keeping her man happy, and growing a human being in her body. A rush of terror forced the air from her lungs. The ever-present option, of course, was to run. Nothing was irreversible, and she had mastered the art of the exit. Getting out would solve most of those problems.
Ramona was forced to abandon her plotting and panicking as loud noises emanated from the kitchen. She found her mother puttering around, opening and closing cabinets, stirring something on the stovetop.
Cecilia lifted a white ceramic bowl from a neat stack and set it on the counter. “Not working today, dear?”
It hadn’t taken long for the judgy questions to start. “I’m just taking a break, Mom. I’ve been very tired lately.”
Dark eyes scanned her from head to toe. “Yes, I can see that. You don’t look as well as I would have thought, considering.”
“Considering?”
“Well, your life has slowed down quite a bit, hasn’t it?” Cecilia turned off a burner and slowly poured a thick saffron-colored soup into her bowl. Ramona wasn’t aware they had soup in the house.
“Actually, Mom, I’ve been working on the biggest project of my career.” Ramona reminded herself that she had no reason to get defensive. “Dad’s death hit me hard. I’m still reeling.”
Cecilia brought the bowl to the table and sat down. “I’m sorry I wasn’t able to be here for you.” She blew on the spoon and looked up. “I hope I’m not too late.”
Ramona’s stomach growled, but it wasn’t clear whether from hunger or frustration. Her mother’s ability to see right through her had not lessened one bit.
Cecilia put down her spoon. “Would you like me to heat up some soup for you? I’d love for you to sit and eat with me.”
“No, I can do it. Please start. You must be starving.”
The only sounds in the kitchen as she heated up more soup were the clang of pots and utensils, as well as a soft hum from her mother. Ramona thought of Leni, singing along to her music while cooking. Under different circumstances, the two women might have gotten along very well, but Ramona wasn’t about to test out that possibility. There was already enough conflict in the house.
She took the seat next to her mother and swirled her spoon through the thick soup. She had no idea when Lucas had made a batch of her favorite coconut curry soup, but there it was, in the fridge. It would be impossible for him to be any more thoughtful. If only she could figure out how to do the same.
The two women sipped their soup.
“Are you going to tell me why you’re really here, Mom?”
Cecilia crinkled the corners of her eyes in an expression that made her look even more like a devilish pixie. “I told you, Cariña, I came for you.”
Ramona groaned. “Please, Mom.”
“You’ve become so cynical, sweetheart. I don’t understand why you doubt me. You know that I can feel you. And what I felt told me you were in trouble. Of course, I was not sure until I saw you.”
“I’m not in trouble, Mom.” The double entendre of those words did not go lost on Ramona, but she let it pass. “I’m grieving my father. I’m adjusting to a new life. I’m embarking on a challenging phase of my professional life. That’s all.”
Cecilia gave her a half-smile. “Hmmm. This soup is wonderful, by the way. You’re lucky to find a man who will always keep you well fed.”
Ramona resigned herself that she’d get nothing more from her mother. Demanding an explanation from the woman who never explained herself was futile. “Yes, I am very lucky. Lucas is the most wonderful man I’ve ever known.”
“I heard that he left some woman at the altar.” An eyebrow rose. “For you.”
Ramona swallowed the story that wanted to come out. “Yes, it was a difficult situation.”
Her mother burst out laughing. “You must think that I’ve gone daft in the jungle. Quite the opposite, my dear daughter. Regardless, I won’t force you to talk about it.” Cecilia spun in her chair and bore her ebony eyes into Ramona’s. “There is something I need to tell you. More importantly, you need to hear it.”
Ramona tipped back in her chair, an involuntary fear response creating a tightening in the center of her chest. The confrontation she knew was coming had arrived.
“I know I’ve always told you to fight your own battles. What matters is being able to stand on your own two feet. Don’t depend on any man. And, dear daughter, you’ve excelled. You’ve kept yourself clear of any of that nonsense that took me down and has destroyed many women before you. But-”
“Hey there! Anybody home?”
Both women jumped up at the unexpected sound of Connor’s voice.
He appeared in the kitchen, picked up his mother, and spun her around. “So sorry I’m late, Mom.” He put her down and stroked her hair. “I’m so glad you’re here.”
“I had a good rest and have been spending time with your sister. No trouble at all.”
Connor tipped his head toward Ramona. “Hey.”
Her mouth set in a hard line. “Hey.”
He turned back to his mother. “Are you ready?”
“Yes, sure. All my things are in the guest-room.”
Ramona pushed down the urge to cross her arms and get into fighting stance. “Ready for what?”
“Bringing her to my house. She’s staying with me.” He turned to his mother. “I’ll go get your bags.”
Ramona blinked at the sight of him heading toward the bedroom. Those two together, like a flashback to childhood. Connor and Mom, as it had always been.
Her mother clutched her arm. Not gently, either. “We’ll continue our conversation another time, sweetheart. Maybe I’ll come over tomorrow morning.” She kissed her on each cheek, then on the tip of her nose. “I love you.”
Ramona
stood at the front door well after Connor’s car had driven away. The whole thing felt like a prank. He probably knew their mother was coming and never said. She wondered what they were up to, the winter air adding a shiver to the growing anger rippling through her.
Ramona crossed and uncrossed her hands. Perhaps she should have taken her mother’s comment the day before about coming over more seriously.
Since her mother walked in the door that morning, she wouldn’t stop staring, as if she was looking straight into her soul. Ramona blinked. There was nothing there she wanted her mother to see.
“Are you sure you don’t want to eat, Mom? You know Lucas always has something delicious in the house.”
“No, dear. I don’t want to ruin my appetite for Connor’s luncheon. It’s a special occasion, you know.”
Ramona bit her tongue to not start railing against her brother, who’d neglected to extend her an invitation to his special occasion. Even Lucas hadn’t mentioned that her brother was holding a party at the restaurant. In any case, complaining about her brother to her mother was a lost cause. Everyone knew which child was her favorite.
“I was hoping we’d have a chance to finish the conversation we started yesterday, but I don’t want to be late.”
“Don’t worry, Mom. Winston’s is only a few minutes away from here. We have plenty of time.” Which Ramona didn’t actually want.
“Ramona, I’m worried about you. Your brother has been telling me that you haven’t been yourself, and now that I see it with my own eyes, I think it’s even worse than he described.”
“Worse? Wha-”
“You’re bone thin and your eyes are dark. Like you haven’t been sleeping or eating. And there’s the fact that you seemed to have thrown away the entirety of your hard-won success and independence to come back to this evil place and play house with Lucas, of all people.”
Ramona prepared several responses in her head, but none made any sense. It was impossible to know where to start in that ridiculousness her mother was spewing.
