John turned back to Maggie again and she gave a slight nod.
“Okay then. If you’re sure.”
Clearly pleased John would be joining them for the holiday, Rickey began chattering about his plans for both the day—and for John.
“I bet you can’t wait for Santa to come,” John said.
Rickey appeared to deflate before his eyes. “I don’t believe in Santa,” he said glumly. “Santa is for babies.”
John was surprised to hear that the little boy no longer believed in the jolly old elf. He was only five. When he glanced over at Maggie, he could see the concern on her face. He abruptly changed the subject. “Rickey, about this snowman you want to make… What do you intend to use for the eyes, nose, and mouth?”
Rickey perked right up and began discussing his plans for the snowman he was determined to build. John gave him his rapt attention as he talked animatedly until dinner ended.
“Honey, run upstairs and get Pocomo. He needs to go outside. I think he’s laying on my bed.”
“Okay, Mama!” He rose from his chair and turned to go. He abruptly paused and turned back, noting John was rising from his chair. “Are you leaving, John?”
“I’m afraid I have to,” he said.
Rickey rounded the table and threw his arms around him. “Be careful at work, okay.” He suddenly frowned. “Your job is really dangerous, huh?” He grew quiet, lost in thought for a moment. “Even more dangerous than…” His words trailed off, his voice barely a whisper.
Maggie’s heart broke for her little boy. She knew he was remembering his father.
John understood as well, and he bent down and lifted the little boy into his arms.
Rickey wrapped his arms around his neck. “Be careful at work. Okay?” he whispered.
John squeezed him tight. “I’m always careful,” he whispered back. “And you sleep good tonight. Okay?”
Rickey pulled back and smiled into John’s face. “I’d sleep better if I had a lamb…”
John chuckled and settled him on his feet. “I’ll see you later.”
Rickey grinned and charged up the stairs to retrieve the dog. Maggie walked John to the door. There, he gathered Maggie into his arms. “Your husband died around this time of year, didn’t he?”
She nodded without speaking.
“And that’s why Rickey doesn’t believe in Santa Claus?”
“He believes Santa let him down…”
“In a big way,” John finished for her.
“This is supposed to be the happiest season of all, but when you lose a loved one during the holiday…” She shrugged and sighed sadly.
“It forever taints the time of year,” he finished with understanding, and then pulled back and looked into her eyes. “Let’s try to make the holiday especially festive for Rickey. Let’s try to replace the sad memories with happy ones. He was only three…” He words dropped off, as it occurred to him that Rickey wasn’t the only one suffering from sad memories. He pulled Maggie into a hug again.
“You’re right,” she said resolutely, as she stepped away from him and met his gaze. “It’s time to make happy memories again.”
John smiled and kissed her gently on the lips. “I want to be part of those memories,” he said, knowing with his whole heart that the words he’d spoken were true. He wanted a future with Maggie and her son. In a short span of time, he’d fallen in love with both of them.
If only they could fall in love with him too. If only he could show them they could count on him.
“May I call you later?” he asked.
“Please,” she said.
***
“What are you doing, son?” Maggie called.
Rickey was standing at the sliding glass door, with his nose pressed against it. He’d pulled the drape back, and she could feel the cold permeating the glass.
“I’m looking for a camel, or a donkey, or a lamb,” he told her.
“Honey, I think they’ve got the animals pretty well corralled now. I don’t think any other animals are coming. So please close the drape. It’s so cold outside.”
Rickey stepped away from the window and the insulated drape fell into place. He gave a sigh. “I just wish the animals would come back. I miss them.”
“Honey, the only animal we need is Pocomo.”
When he heard his name, the Chihuahua thumped his tail. Rickey crossed the room and sat down beside him. Distractedly, he began petting the little dog.
“Is something on your mind, honey?” Maggie asked. She walked into the family room and sat down beside him. She took his little hand. “Well?”
He gave a fatigued sigh. “I’ve been thinking a lot about Daddy,” he told her.
Maggie’s heart gave a thump and she braced for what was coming. Rickey was only five, but she knew he’d been thinking a lot about his father. She’d found a picture of the two of them, normally kept on his bedside table, under his pillow. “What about Daddy?” she prompted.
He frowned worriedly. “Mama, will Daddy’s feelings be hurt if we...?”
“What, honey?”
He sighed. “Mama, I like John a lot. Sometimes I think…”
“What, sweetie?”
“I think I’d like it if he was my daddy. Is it wrong to think like that?”
Maggie reached for him and pulled him into her arms. “No, honey, it’s natural that you miss your father.”
“No, but… I mean, it’s more than that. I love John a lot. Would Daddy be sad if he knew that I love John too?”
Maggie sagged in the chair. She knew Rickey cared about John. She knew that he idolized him and that he talked about him constantly. She wondered—had she made a mistake letting Rickey get so close to him so soon?
She had to acknowledge she hadn’t sought to know John, but that he’d appeared in their lives. Had she been seeking a relationship, and been attuned to the natural progression of a relationship, she would have protected Rickey better. She wouldn’t have introduced him to any love interest until she deemed the timing right.
Maybe this was all too much for Rickey. Maybe she should slow things down a bit, for his sake. “Maybe we shouldn’t see so much of John,” she mused under her breath.
She hadn’t realized she’d said the words aloud, until Rickey cried, “Mama, no! Please don’t send him away. I love him! And he loves us!”
“Honey…”
He leapt from the sofa. “I prayed for him, and God sent him!” He shook his head abruptly, as if warding off the idea of losing John. “No, Mama. You don’t mess with God’s plan. He sent him to us…”
“Rickey…”
The little boy charged up the stairs and Maggie heard his door slam behind him. She rose and began walking slowly up the stairs.
What had she done? She’d let a man into their lives. And if things didn’t work out between her and John—and did she even want them to?—Rickey was going to be devastated.
Chapter Fifteen
“I figured you’d be spending the day with John,” Gloria said.
It was Saturday, and she and Maggie were presently sitting at a table in a popular fast food restaurant. They were beside an expansive window that afforded a view of the massive, undercover play structure nearby.
“I’m spending part of tomorrow with him,” she said.
“Oh, that’s right. Are you sure you don’t need a sitter? Justin is spending the night, and he and Rickey get along famously.” By way of demonstration, she pointed out the window at the two boys, who were chasing one another around the structure.
“I love you for offering, but he’s going over to a friend’s house for a few hours.”
Gloria nodded. “You seem glum,” she observed. “What’s on your mind?”
“I’m worried about Rickey. He’s so taken with John…”
Gloria wrinkled her face. “And … this is a problem…how?”
Maggie sighed, and followed by taking a deep breath. “The other night, he asked me if it’s okay to l
ove John? He also asked me if I thought his dad would be hurt that he loves John?”
Gloria shrugged. “He’s a bright, sensitive little boy. He’s just trying to work things out in his own mind.”
“But…” Maggie sighed again. “I’m afraid this—this thing with John—sort of took us by surprise.”
“Well, he did come into your lives via a call to the police department,” Gloria said drolly.
“I know, and because he sort of took us off guard, I didn’t proceed with caution, as I would have otherwise.”
Gloria scoffed. “You are the poster child for caution, my dear. You haven’t jumped into anything.” She narrowed her eyes and leveled them on her friend. “Maggie, sometimes, life has a way of taking us by surprise.”
“I know that better than anyone,” she said sadly.
“But honey, you can’t choreograph life. You can’t wake up one day and announce, ‘I’m ready for a relationship’ and expect Prince Charming to appear. Honey, I’m afraid Officer Charming has already appeared, and you’re railing because you didn’t choose the timing of his arrival.” Gloria fixed her with a gaze. “Did you ever think God might have a plan for you, my friend?”
Maggie sat silently for several seconds. “Rickey told me he prayed to God and that God sent him.”
“Well, there you go!” Gloria cried. “God sent him.”
“But I’m not ready,” she moaned, and dropped her head onto her arms.
“Who says?”
She raised her head slightly. “Me.”
“From what I’ve observed, and from Rickey’s response to the man—not to mention yours,” she added pointedly, “I think you are ready.”
“…So, have you finished all your Christmas shopping?” Maggie asked.
Gloria scowled. “That was the most pathetic ‘change of subject’ attempt I’ve ever heard,” she said in a surly tone. “But, okay, I get it. You don’t want to discuss your love life any longer. So, yes, I’m done shopping. You?”
“Except…”
“You’re supposed to go shopping with John tomorrow.”
“I’m pretty crummy at changing subjects,” Maggie acknowledged. “About shopping with him, I should cancel.”
“No, you shouldn’t,” Gloria said in measured tones. “Maggie, please. Give him a chance. I agree with you that you need to take things slow. So take things slow. But don’t eject John from your world. If you do, I’m afraid you may end up regretting it.”
“Regrets…” Maggie mused.
She had her fair share of those.
***
John rose early Sunday morning. He ate his breakfast quickly, since he’d made a decision late last night. He decided he was going to attend a church service at the church near Maggie’s home, where the nativity scene was set up.
He had appreciated the pastor’s quick response to the donkey’s destruction of Maggie’s backyard. He had remembered that the pastor and several of the men who had come to help with the cleanup had invited him to a service. He’d always attended church as a kid, but his church going had tapered off considerably during his marriage to Kim. She hadn’t wanted to attend church, and had chided him when he did.
As he sat on his bed and tugged on his shoes, he considered calling Maggie. Would she want to go with him? He suspected Rickey might enjoy attending Sunday school.
He decided to broach the subject later, rather than call her now. It was early and he hated to wake her if she was sleeping. He knew how hard she worked both on the job and at home. He marveled at how well she managed to maintain a home when she had so much on her plate.
He felt his heart swell just thinking about her. She was everything a man could want in a woman, yet he sensed she wasn’t ready for a serious relationship right now. He could also sense she was torn about him, as if trying to determine what her next move should be, or if she should be making any move at all toward a relationship.
He knew better than to push, since he didn’t want to destroy the trust he was building with her. As a mother to a young son, she knew better than to take any chances with Rickey’s well-being, and he respected her for that. He knew full well the only reason he’d gained any access into her world was that he was the officer fortunate enough to receive the call from dispatch about the camel.
Indeed, he would tread softly and carefully. He knew in his gut she was worth the wait.
Rising from the bed, he reached for the jacket he’d draped on the back of a chair. He was just shrugging into it when his phone rang.
Who would be calling him early on Sunday? Work?
“Hello.”
“Johnnie?”
He cringed. It was Kim, and calling him ‘Johnnie’ meant she wanted something. He raked a hand through his hair. “What is it, Kim? I don’t have much time.”
“I…” She took a shuddering breath. “I’ve left Alex.”
“What do you want me to say?” he asked tiredly, as he checked the clock beside his bed.
“Johnnie, why do you sound so … unconcerned?”
“Because, Kim, I am. You made a choice. I’m afraid you’re going to have to live with it.”
“But…” She gave a sly laugh. “You know that’s not true. Come over. We’ll talk. I know we can fix what went wrong between us.”
This time he laughed, and it was without humor. “I’m not interested, Kim. Please hear what I’m telling you. We’re done. I’m talked out. I wish you the best.”
He hung up the phone and strode out of his bedroom. He was eager to get to church, and later, to go Christmas shopping with Maggie. He hoped she was as eager to spend the day with him.
As John pulled up to her house, Rickey was just bounding out the front door and toward his friend, who had exited a small sedan.
When he spotted John, he detoured, and dashed to the curb. John was also driving his sedan, and Rickey stood beside the passenger door, bouncing up and down. “John, you’re here!” he cried eagerly.
“I’m here,” he concurred with a grin, as he closed the car door and strode around the hood.
Rickey practically launched himself into John’s arms. He hoisted him up with an exaggerated groan. “Did you grow since I saw you last?”
“I did! Gloria’s fudge gave me a growth spurt.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“You should eat some too!” Rickey told him.
John spotted Maggie then, as she walked toward them.
“Do you want some fudge, John?” Rickey asked. “Gloria brought some over yesterday.”
“I do, but I’m afraid I’ll have a growth spurt too, if I keep eating all the cookies and fudge at your house.”
“Are you getting taller too?” Rickey inquired.
“No, I’m getting rounder,” he answered.
Maggie reached them and appeared to assess John’s girth. “Yeah, right. Why is it some men can eat goodies galore and never put on a pound, but we women…”
He reached for her hand. “You look perfect,” he told her. And she did look great in slacks and a white, cable knit sweater.
She colored slightly at the compliment, but tugged him gently toward the other car. Rickey’s friend’s mother had climbed out of the sedan to greet them.
“Hello, Kathi,” Maggie called. “Thank you so much for picking Rickey up. He’s so excited for today, he can hardly stand it.”
“John, I’m going to Kevin’s house,” he announced. “We’re going to play cops and robbers.”
John chuckled. “Let me guess. You’re going to be the cop.”
“Yep.”
John lowered the little boy to the ground. “Be good,” he told him.
“I will.”
“Kathi, this is John. John, Kathi.”
“Good to meet you,” John said, and Maggie didn’t miss the speculative glance Kathi sent his way.
“You too,” she answered, and then ushered both boys into the backseat of the car.
Maggie leaned in and helped the boys into their boos
ter seats. “Have fun, and be a good boy,” she directed to Rickey.
As the sedan pulled away from the curb, Maggie watched after it. She was actually grateful John was holding her hand. It was difficult letting Rickey go on a weekend, when she missed so much time with him during the workweek. She gave a sigh.
“He’ll be fine,” John assured her, though he had to admit to himself, he also felt a tinge of worry watching Rickey being driven off. He suspected he would be a protective parent like Maggie if he had a child.
Maggie hesitated curbside and he kissed the top of her head. “We can always go after them. He’d probably enjoy shopping with us.”
“Except I’m shopping for him,” she said with a smile. “Of course, it’s not as if he believes in Santa Claus...”
John gave her hand a shoring squeeze and they walked toward the house. He stepped aside to allow her in first, and he followed, closing the door behind them.
“I’ll get my coat,” she told him.
A couple moments later, they were sitting in his car and he was pulling away from the curb. Maggie sent him a hesitant glance. She’d been doing a lot of thinking about him, and had resolved to slow things down a bit—though nobody could accuse her of rushing anything. She certainly wasn’t going to rush a physical relationship, since her belief system precluded it. She wondered how he would feel about that if they did embark upon a serious relationship.
She suddenly wondered about John’s ex-wife. He’d been divorced one short year. As such, was he even ready for a relationship? Was he even seeking one? What did he want?
They’d known each other such a short time, it didn’t seem appropriate to even pose the questions?
He turned and caught her watching him with a questioning gaze.
“Is everything all right?”
She nodded her head slowly.
“Did you need to ask me something?”
She took a deep breath and plowed ahead. “I was wondering if…”
“What?” he prompted with a smile.
She decided honesty was the best policy. “I want to ask you about your marriage, but it’s none of my business. But too,” she said with a shoring sigh, “I don’t want to hurt you by bringing it up.”
The Happiest Season Page 13
