“Don’t worry. I know how to stay in my lane. Unlike that trollop my father was about to marry. The only thing that brings me comfort about his death is the fact that there won’t be an unholy union between them.”
“Was she seeing someone else?” I ask the question while craning my neck in the direction Jenson took off in.
She laughs. “So you heard the rumors? They were true, by the way. I don’t know what those two were scheming, but I knew one or both of them were going to rob my father blind. And much like my father, I’d do anything to get what I wanted. And I wanted those two apart no matter what the cost.” She glances to the front. “I hope you find what you’re looking for. Good luck with the mattress.” She shakes her head over at Everett. “I can’t imagine you get a lot of sleeping done.” She gives a few hard blinks. “You’ll have to forgive me, Lottie. I haven’t been in my right mind ever since my father’s passing.”
“Please don’t worry about it.”
“Hey? You run the bakery, don’t you?”
“I sure do.”
“Would you mind if I ordered a few dessert platters for my father’s celebration of life party? He hated funerals and made me promise if anything should happen to him I’d throw a big party. It’s at the same house where the bridal boutique was held. I guess it’s fitting to have his final celebration where he breathed his last.”
Odd is more like it.
“Yes, of course. I’ll be happy to supply whatever you need.”
“Perfect. I’ll call the bakery and put in an order.” She begins to step away before pausing. “And make sure you bring some of those delicious cake pops. It seemed he was enjoying them right up until the bitter end.” A dark smile curls on her lips.
She takes off, and I speed over to Carlotta and the spooky bunch having an otherworldly time at the expense of those poor mattress springs.
“Well, well,” I say. “If it isn’t Nell.”
Nell chortles as she bounces onto her bottom before bouncing right off the bed and inspires Carlotta to do the same.
“Here’s the killjoy.” Carlotta makes a face at me before catching Bruiser like a football. “I’d best find me a treat before I miss out on Mr. Sexy’s offer.” She leans my way. “And if Mr. Sexy makes you an offer later, Lot, you’ll have me to thank for it.”
“You goosed him, didn’t you?”
She gives a sly wink. “You’re welcome.” She takes off with Bruiser braying in her arms.
“Nell, I’ve made up my mind. I’m keeping Bruiser. He’s too cute to let out of my sight.”
Her brows hike a notch, and I can’t help but note they look as lavender as her hair.
“And here I thought you were about to say that you were keeping Mr. Sexy.”
“He’s sort of a keeper, too.” I swoon a little as I watch him rifle through a tray of knickknacks.
“He’s certainly not hard on the eyes,” she adds.
“And he’s smart as a tower full of legal books,” I add. “A real gentleman, too.”
“And what kind of a father is he?”
“The best.”
Nell’s entire countenance glows the color of a brand new sunrise.
“Lottie Lemon, you’re glowing.”
“You’re glowing.”
A laugh gets buried in her chest. “I’m simply reflecting your aura, Lottie. You’re in love with that man.”
I sigh as I watch him from afar. “Don’t I know it.”
“And Noah?”
“Oh, I love him, too.”
“But?”
My mouth falls open. “What makes you think there’s a but?” I sag a moment. “Fine. There’s a but.” I shrug. “But I’m married to Everett.”
“I know, Lottie.” She leans in and gives me a kiss.
“I just wish the picture was clear,” I say.
“It’s clearer than you think.” And just like that, Nell does a disappearing act.
Carlotta and Everett head this way. She’s got something that looks akin to a brass tennis racket in her hand.
“All right,” I say. “I give. What is it?”
“A bed warmer. The sign said it’s haunted. That’s what they call added value.”
“Carlotta, both you and I can see ghosts just fine and I don’t see a single one. Not even Bruiser is here at the moment.”
“Party pooper.” She looks to Everett. “I’ll be up at the register. Good luck with the wet blanket. Had I raised her, she’d be landing you horizontally one more time on that bed, and the next time you got up, you’d have a smile on your face.” She takes off, and I glower at her.
“Bed warmer, huh?” I take a breath. “I’ll pay you back.”
Everett has a naughty grin twitching on his face. “I have an idea of how that might work.”
“Let me guess, a bed warmer for a bed warmer?”
“Good guess.”
The sound of arguing emanates from the front, and I glance that way to see both Debbie and Jenson going at it again.
Bruiser said they were fighting over something that had to do with the investment deal on the property—about greed.
Debbie said she’d do anything to keep Jenson and Analise away from her father. And now I wonder just how far she’d go.
Jenson isn’t exactly wiped off my list either. And it makes me wonder if the killer is indeed in my midst.
Chapter 13
There are many recipes out there on how to make the perfect cake pop.
There are specialty baking pans and irons you can purchase to help cultivate the perfect round shape needed, but my recipe doesn’t call for a pan or a specialty iron of any kind.
My favorite way to create these sweet wonders is to bake a sheet cake of any flavor. Today I’ve opted for luscious red velvet. There’s just something special about biting into a cake pop and seeing that gorgeous crimson shade on the inside. And the cocoa-infused cake complements the white chocolate base of the candy coating on the outside.
Once I have the cake baked and cooled, I simply pull it apart into a large mixing bowl. Then I add frosting, lots of frosting, in the exact flavor needed to complement the cake at hand. For this lovely treat, I’ve opted for my thick velvety cream cheese frosting. And that’s where the fun begins.
I simply mash all of the ingredients together and begin rolling walnut-sized balls onto parchment paper. And just like that, the cake pops are ready for their final act—a bath of melted white chocolate in any shade of pastel. I secure each ball of red velvet cake onto a lollipop stick and dip it into the liquefied magic, then I simply land them individually on an acrylic stand specially designed to hold them upright while they dry. And like clockwork they sell out each and every day—every day of the year.
Of course, now that Mr. Pemberley perished with a bouquet of these cuties in his hand, they’ve been selling out twice as fast, thus the increased production that has these round balls of devilish delight chasing me down in my dreams. I’ve had to slow down production on the usual cakes and cookies I stock in my shop just to keep up with the intense demand.
It’s morbid when you think about it—people charging through my bakery doors asking for the murder special of the month. It makes me cringe to hear it. And more horrifying than that is the fact some people have accused me of drumming up business by planting my sweet treats on the deceased. Even worse than that, they’ve accused me of actually offing the deceased.
It’s still relatively early. The bakery has just opened and Lily is working the front counter for me. I’m alone in my kitchen, my safe haven, my only reprieve from reality on most days when a swirl of glorious light infuses the room to my right. Inside of a vat of tiny lavender stars, Nell appears in all her afterworld glory.
“Oh dear,” she muses as she looks to the island covered in tiny little cake pops in every shade of pastel. “Someone has been very, very busy.” She plucks a fresh cake pop from the stand and indulges in a bite. “Mmm! Lottie.” She closes her eyes and shakes her head. �
�I knew you would be a spectacular baker when you were a child. You showed so much promise. But this?” She wags the half-eaten treat my way. “You’ve outdone yourself.”
“That’s because you taught me everything you know. I wasn’t just working with you at the Honey Pot Diner. It was an apprenticeship. And I would have still been happy as a clam working as the pastry chef if you hadn’t opened up this bakery.”
“I opened it for you.” She plucks another cake pop from the stand. “And I’m glad it’s still in your possession.”
“Of course, it is. You left half of Honey Hollow to me in your will. And speaking of Will, my new uncle wasn’t pleased, but that’s all in the past. The judge sided with me and all of your final wishes have been granted. How does it feel to know you finished life on top, Nell?”
“Oh, the beat goes on.” She waves me off. “There is still lots of living to do on the other side. People think once they pass from this life to the next they’ll be seated on a cloud strumming a harp, but that’s simply not true. We’re quite busy there, too, you know.”
“But there aren’t any bills to pay, no worries that you’re going to meet some awful demise, or lose a loved one.”
“No, but we think often of those still living.” She tips her head my way. “And we are concerned to an extent. We don’t have to worry because we know all things will work out just the way they’re supposed to in the end—that our loved ones will end up with the exact people they’re destined to be with.”
My mouth falls open. “Like me? Nell, you know something! Which one do I end up with? Everett or Noah?”
She glances to the ceiling. “Life isn’t so cookie-cutter, Lottie. Some people have more than one soul mate. It just so happens that you found both at the very same time.” Her brows furrow. “An unusual case, and perhaps a regrettable error as far as fate goes. But, nonetheless, it was bound to happen at one juncture of time or another.” She pauses for a moment. “But in this, too, there is a reason.”
“So they’re both my soul mates,” I say just as Carlotta wanders into the kitchen.
“Ah-ha!” She claps her hands as she points my way. “I knew it.” Carlotta slaps Nell on the back and poor Nell bucks as if she felt it. “Our little Lot Lot is going to have the first reverse harem Honey Hollow has seen. Don’t worry, Lot. Once that three-way scenario catches on, you won’t be such an anomaly. In fact, I’ll take one for the team and join in on the endeavor early. There’s no better way to normalize crazy than to pull a few more people onto the bandwagon. I’ve already got Harry in the bag. It’s time for me to hunt down the third partner in my tawdry trifecta.”
Both Nell and I shudder.
“I’m not normalizing threesomes, Carlotta. And I’m not in one of those reverse harems. This is about love, about matters of the heart, and I will do whatever I need to protect both Noah and Everett from any ugly rumors that this town has to offer.”
Carlotta gives a stiff nod. “Spoken like a woman in command of two men. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you lifted that verbatim out of Ms. Snow and the Seven Plumbers, chapter seven second paragraph right before she called them all to her love den and—”
Lily waves as she walks into the room. “Naomi’s out here. She wants to speak with you, Lot.”
“Saved by Naomi.” Words I never thought I’d say. I scuttle past both Nell and Carlotta to find that not only is Naomi out here, scowling my way, but her bubbly twin, Keelie, is seated on a barstool at the counter noshing on a cake pop. “Morning, ladies!” I reach over and hug my bestie. “You look amazing.” It’s true. Keelie’s skin just picks up a little more of an ethereal glow with each passing day. “How are things on the dress front?”
She cowers a moment. “Great?”
Naomi holds up a hand. “My sister is a liar. Things are not great. We’re going to have a naked bride on our hands.”
Carlotta lets out a whoop as she files out of the kitchen after me. “Another trend we’ll be starting, right here in Honey Hollow. The way you girls are going at it, we’ll be the trendsetting capital of the world.”
Naomi giggles to herself. “Lottie’s got the market on dead bodies. I’m shocked no one has sent a news crew to document your deadly debacles. My guess is you’ll be implicated in one of your slaughtering shenanigans one day, and it will be revealed you were behind each and every murder.” A satisfied smile rubber bands across her face.
Lily looks my way. “How exciting to have a serial killer in our midst.”
Naomi scoffs at Lily’s admiration of my nonexistent slaughtering skills. “It would figure you’d be the first to kiss her behind. You either want a raise or are secretly afraid you’ll be next. I’m thinking both.”
Lily shoots me a look. “She’s right. I’m both. Don’t do me dirty, Lottie. Nine times out of ten, I close for you at night.”
I make a face. “I know that, Lily. I also know that you and that new boyfriend of yours have been fooling around in my kitchen. Do it again and you won’t like the outcome.”
She sucks in a quick breath and I try not to giggle. It’s true. Now that every inch of both the outside and the inside of this shop is covered with security cameras, I’ve had the distinct privilege of witnessing more than a few coital exchanges between Lily and Seven, her beefy security guard boyfriend. Everett hired Seven to watch over me a few months back. And while Seven was doing time here at the bakery, Lily set her sights on him.
Carlotta slips a few more cake pops onto Keelie’s plate. “Speaking of doing the nasty, it’s time we shore up details of this little chickie’s bachelorette party. What are we going to do, girls? Start off the evening in Leeds at some dicey male strip joint, go bar-hopping, play some strip poker with a few good men before having a friendly cop arrest the bride-to-be for looking too sexy? Don’t worry, Keels. He’ll be hot-to-trot and let you get up close and personal, and he’ll put on quite the gun show while he’s at it. I’ve already enlisted Meg to put out a call to all the naughty hotties in the banana hammock industry.” She looks my way. “Of course, I already promised Evie she could sneak out and join us. There are some things we don’t need to tell her daddy.”
“Well, as her mommy, I say no. We’re not taking a fifteen-year-old to a strip club.”
Keelie lifts a cake pop. “None of us are going to a strip club. I promised Bear I wouldn’t do that to him.”
“Aw!” Lily clucks her tongue as she looks my way. “Can’t we go ahead and have the bachelorette party without her? What are we supposed to do? Sit in a circle and knit?”
“Ooh!” Keelie nods as she finishes up a bite. “I’m working on a blanket for the baby with a pair of Grandma Nell’s old knitting needles.”
“Gracious, that’s sweet,” Nell mumbles from behind with a mouthful of cake pop.
Naomi, Lily, and Carlotta all groan in unison at the thought.
“Fine.” Keelie tosses her arms in the air. “I’ll go with whatever you ladies have planned, but go easy on the strippers and the banana hammocks. I don’t want to be touched by any of those men, and I want all the cake pops I can eat.”
“Will do,” I say.
Carlotta glances down at her phone and sighs just as Noah walks into the bakery.
“Excuse me, ladies,” I say as I make my way over to him and pull him into a warm embrace. For some reason, having Nell officially tell me that both Noah and Everett are my soul mates has centered me and has given me an odd sense of peace. But it was no cosmic secret. She was only confirming what I already knew.
“Hey, handsome.” I land a chaste kiss to his cheek and Noah’s dimples dig in deep, but his smile is short-lived. I recognize this look on his face and it sends a knot straight to the pit of my stomach. “What’s wrong, Noah?”
“It’s Luke Lazzari and his men. The ATF couldn’t make the charges stick. They get to walk, all of them. All that work for nothing. That sting was years in the making.”
My fingers fly to my lips. “I ruined it, didn’t I?”
“No,” he’s quick to contest it as he wraps his arms around me. “No, I promise you did no such thing. I was just on the way to the precinct when my phone went off. I parked down the street to pick up the line, and after I got the news, I lost my enthusiasm to head to work. Some days I wonder if what I do makes a difference.”
“Noah, you’re a great detective.”
“Name one killer I’ve brought to justice, Lottie. You can’t because you were directly responsible for catching them all.”
“Well”—I think on it a moment and come up empty—“okay, so I may have stumbled upon a few killers, but it’s always you who cuffs them.”
He makes a face as he digs out his handcuffs from his jacket and hands them to me.
Carlotta crops up next to us. “Ooh, looks as if things are about to get kinky. Hold that thought, Foxy. Lot Lot, take off your apron. You’ve got somewhere you need to be.”
“If it involves banana hammocks, count me out.”
Carlotta snickers. “It may not involve hunks with more junk in their trunks than you’d know what to do with, but it does involve a gaggle of curvy cuties and maybe a very grateful mobster who insists on seeing you.”
“No way,” Noah says it gruff and rough as if he means business.
“Yes way,” Carlotta is quick to tell him. “You can come with us or stay behind, Foxy. Because nobody says no to Luke Lazzari.”
Chapter 14
In a show of appreciation only a mobster can provide, Luke Lazzari sent a limousine to pick me up outside of my bakery and take me all the way to a fine town known as Leeds, to a themed establishment called Macho Camacho’s Bar and Girls—yes, Girls. I have a feeling those girls won’t be wearing too much either.
“I’m glad I showed up when I did,” Noah says, looking up at the fifty-foot tall cutout of a woman that stands on the roof of this skeezy-looking bar.
Carlotta taps me in the ribs with her elbow. “Should we invite Mr. Sexy to the party? Something tells me Luke will be rolling out the red carpet for yours truly. This is a once in a lifetime, Lot. We’re going to see things in there no human eyes have yet to see. We’re going to do things in there no human mind has ever conceived. And we’re going to eat things in there that your palate will never forget.”
Cake Pop Casualties (MURDER IN THE MIX Book 22) Page 11
