Until Then

by McLaughlin, Heidi

  NINETEEN

  Rennie woke to the smell of freshly brewed coffee, the sound of birds squawking, and the . . . ocean. It took her a long minute to remember where she was, and when she rolled over to verify her surroundings, she almost fell off whatever she was sleeping on, her back screaming in protest, and her legs flailed about until one planted firmly on the ground. She sat up and looked around for Graham and saw him sitting on his patio, reading the newspaper. The sliding glass door was open a smidge, enough to let the cool ocean breeze in. Next to the couch sat her suitcase. She stood, picked it up, and made her way to the bathroom, afraid to turn on the light. The last thing she wanted to see was how wretched she looked or what Graham had to see when he picked her up last night. Rennie closed her eyes, flipped the light switch on, and braced her hands against the ledge of the counter.

  When she opened her eyes, she saw pain, suffering, and anger staring back at her. Her eyes were bloodshot and puffy, her cheeks stained with makeup.

  When she stared at her reflection, she thought back to the last twenty-four hours and how everything fell apart . . . or had it? Maybe life had finally come to fruition. Maybe there was a deeper meaning to what she was feeling.

  The knock at the door startled her. “I’ll be out in a minute.”

  “The pump’s on so you can shower. There are fresh towels under the sink. Can I get you anything?” His voice was so kind and caring. She owed Graham an apology for how she acted last night—how she ignored him when all he tried to do was get her to talk to him. Yet, he never gave up. She’d heard every word he had said to her.

  “Coffee, please.”

  “Of course, Ren.”

  Because his place was small, she could easily hear him walk the few feet to the kitchen. She heard him fumble around, likely popping another pod into the coffee maker or setting a cup under the dispenser. She turned on the water for the shower, undressed, and stepped into the stand-up. The water felt good, and as much as she wanted to stay under the hot spray for an eternity, she knew from Graham’s stories that hot water on the houseboat didn’t last very long. She washed her hair and body, using his soap even though she had her own in her suitcase. But there was something about the way Graham smelled. It appealed to her, comforted her.

  When she emerged from the shower, she pulled her damp hair into a bun and dried off. She dressed in a pair of lounge pants and an oversize sweatshirt belonging to Graham, which she had found hanging on a hook behind the door. Her cup of coffee was sitting on the counter, along with a blueberry muffin, when she came out of the bathroom. She took her breakfast outside and made herself comfortable.

  “Nice sweatshirt.”

  She pulled the fabric to her nose and inhaled deeply. “It smells like you.”

  “And that’s a good thing?” he asked. Graham closed and folded the paper and set it on the table between them.

  “It’s a great thing,” she replied. “It’s comfort, and I need that right now.”

  He nodded and took his cup back into the house and into the kitchen. Again, she heard him fumbling around, making another cup for himself. She watched the harbor and counted five boats trolling around. There was also a couple in two kayaks who were staying reasonably close to the shore. “Isn’t that dangerous?” she asked when she sensed Graham’s presence. She closed her eyes when she felt a blanket wrap around her shoulders.

  “You’re going to catch a cold with your wet hair,” he told her as he sat down. “And yes, it is dangerous, which is why I’ve been sitting out here since I saw them walk down the dock over there.”

  “It’s too cold, choppy.”

  “And not a lot of people around. If anything, they should be near the pedestrian beaches, where people are running, where they’re visible. They’re risking a lot by being near the marina. Most of the boats around here are for leisure and docked for the winter. Foot traffic these days is very minimal.”

  “I bet they got them for Christmas.”

  “I see you got something new for Christmas.”

  She turned sharply and glared at Graham. What would possess him to say such a thing to her? Her penetrating gaze obviously didn’t faze him as he sipped his coffee.

  “It is hard to miss. It looks like you have a piece of ice hanging from your neck.”

  Her fingers instantly went to her necklace. Somehow, she had forgotten about it and even showered with it on. It had been hiding under her shirt when she had been analyzing herself in the mirror. Surely, if she had seen it, she would’ve taken it off. No, ripped it off, which was what she was doing now. She tugged until the chain dug into her neck and let out a bloodcurdling scream as she tried to yank it away from her body.

  Graham’s hand stilled hers, and in one swift motion, he had the chain away from her skin. The thin gold metal dangled from her clasped hand, and the diamond cut into her palm. She stood and walked the few inches to the railing and dropped the necklace into the water.

  “How very Titanic of you,” Graham quipped.

  “You can just call me Rose.”

  “As long as he’s Jack . . .” Graham paused. “No, I want to be Jack, but you’re moving over, because I refuse to drown.”

  Rennie found herself laughing as she sat back down. She expected regret to take over, but what came was a feeling of relief, and again, she laughed. She laughed so hard tears came out of her eyes, and she had to bend over to curb the ache forming in her side.

  “Care to share the inside joke?”

  “Oh my God, that necklace was probably a couple of thousand dollars, and I just dropped it into the water.”

  “Want me to get some scuba gear and go look for it? It’s not very deep.”

  “You’re serious, aren’t you?” Deep down, she knew he was.

  “For you, yes.”

  She shook her head. “No, I don’t. I don’t ever want to see it again.”

  “You could pawn it,” he told her, and while the thought was appealing, her desire to never lay eyes on it again was stronger.

  “I think I’m good.”

  “Well, now that you’re talking, want to tell me what happened?”

  She tore her eyes away and looked out over the water. The kayakers were still in the area and hadn’t ventured far enough out where they’d need to be rescued. “Do you ever wish you could take your house sailing?”

  He laughed. “No, the thought has never crossed my mind.”

  “Oh, because it’s crossing mine right now. I want to be out there, away from the world.”

  “Okay,” he said. He got up and went into the house. She heard muffled voices and wondered who he was talking to. He came back to the patio and rested against the railing. “We need to go to the store, or I will, but three docks down is Bowie’s boat. We can take it out.”

  “Did you tell him I was here?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why?”

  “Being as I’ve picked you up in Canada when you’re supposed to be with someone else, I imagine that someone is going to come looking for you. It’s better this way. Bowie and Brooklyn won’t tell anyone where you are.”

  “How long can we be out there for?”

  “Depends on what we’re doing. What do you want to do?”

  She stood and pointed. “I want to be away from people.”

  “Okay,” he said. “I can do a couple days until Krista will need a day off. I might have to send her to Hawaii or something after this. She’s been covering my shifts a lot lately.”

  “She’s a good employee.” Rennie paused and then looked at Graham. “Okay, can we go?” She felt like a heel asking him, but she needed to get away. She needed to be someplace where no one would find her.

  “Of course.”

  Together, they walked over to where Bowie’s boat was and undid the tarp. They worked as a team to fold it as small as they could get it for storage. Graham stepped onto the transom and stowed the tarp in one of the cabinets and climbed the steps to the bridge to start the engine. Rennie fo
llowed, and Graham asked her to go down the stairs and into the accommodation area to see what they would need for blankets and such. She made a mental note of items to take from Graham’s and met him back in the upper salon, where the galley kitchen and primary living space was.

  “We need some bedding,” she told him. “There’s only one bed, though.”

  He laughed. “There are two rooms down there, and the couches fold out,” he told her.

  “Oh, okay. Well, there’s some bedding, but I’m not sure how long it has been in there.”

  “We can bring some from my house—come on.” He placed his hand on her arm and helped her step off the boat. He left it running, likely because they weren’t going very far and were coming right back.

  At his house, they gathered what they needed, and Graham packed. She heard him make a phone call, and while she wanted to listen, she kept herself busy instead, rummaging through his cabinets.

  “What are you looking for?”

  She jumped at the sound of his voice, almost like she had been caught snooping. She wasn’t, and she hoped he knew she would never do something like that. “Provisions.”

  “Not here. I wasn’t planning to be home much, so I don’t have anything except a couple bottles of beer.”

  His words gave her pause. She was keeping him from something or someone, and she couldn’t do that to him. “I’m sorry, Graham. This was a mistake. I don’t mean to keep you from your plans or whatever.”

  He chuckled. “If you call working at the bar plans, I must really live a sad life.” He went to her and leaned his hip against the counter. “Krista is going to cover for me. It’s going to cost me extra, but it’ll be worth it.”

  “How do you know?”

  “Because you’re my best girl, Ren, and you need me right now.”

  She moved toward him until her head rested on his chest. She wrapped her arms around his waist, and he did the same to her. She felt his lips press to the top of her head, and her body relaxed against him.

  “Come on.” He let go of her and removed her hands from him. “We have enough gas to get to Kiket Bay. There’s a marina around there somewhere. We can get gas, food, and the provisions we need.”

  “Are you sure you want to do this, Graham?”

  He didn’t say anything as he reached for her hand. He led her out onto the front porch, closed and locked his door. They picked up their bags, with Graham carrying most of them, and made their way over to the boat.

  When they arrived, Bowie’s slip neighbor was getting ready to untie his boat as well. “Morning, Mr. Reser.”

  “Morning, Graham. Taking the Holmes Forty-Two out, I see?”

  Graham’s hand pressed into Rennie’s lower back, and he helped her onboard but didn’t follow. “For a few days at least,” Graham told the man. “What about you?”

  “The missus wants to spend New Year’s Eve out on the water, away from the crazies.”

  “Sounds smart. Have a good time, Mr. Reser. See you next year.” Graham climbed aboard and winked at Rennie as he passed by her and disappeared down below. Rennie was climbing down the steps to get the last bag when the man spoke up.

  “He’s a good man.”

  She paused and looked from the man to where Graham had been a few moments before and back at the man. “I know he is. Someone like me doesn’t deserve someone like him—that’s for sure.”

  “Happy New Year.”

  “You too,” Rennie said. She bent down and picked up the last bag and gave the man a wave before ascending the stairs to the upper salon, where she found Graham putting a few things into the locking cabinets.

  “I put your suitcase in the bigger room. I’ll take the smaller one or sleep up here. The view from the boat at night is pretty spectacular.”

  “Oh, okay,” she said. She went downstairs and into the master bedroom and decided to unpack. She felt the boat start to move and chided herself for not helping Graham pull buoys. He was doing everything for her, and she had nothing to offer in return.

  She came out of the room and found him behind the steering wheel, playing with the navigation equipment. “You know, Brooklyn never told me how nice this boat was. It reminds me of the boat my parents had when I was growing up.”

  “Maybe that’s why.”

  “Yeah, I guess.” Rennie sat down across from where Graham sat and looked out the window. “How long until we’re at the other marina?”

  “Not long. I thought we’d fuel up there, grab a few snacks or something for lunch, and head to Friday Harbor. It’s a great island. It should take us about four to five hours, depending on the wind.”

  “No one will find us.”

  They made eye contact. “He won’t find you, Ren.”

  She nodded. Her purse was beside her, and she felt her phone vibrating. She dug for it and glanced at the notifications. Over one hundred missed calls from Theo and work. One thing she couldn’t stand, and the other got on her nerves lately. She stood and walked to the edge of the boat, cocked her arm back, and heaved her phone into the water. She expected to feel some sort of relief, but she felt only anger.

  “Don’t need it?” Graham asked after she sat back down.

  “The only person I care to speak with is standing next to me,” she said while staring out the window. It was cold, and she tucked her legs under Graham’s sweatshirt. He briefly left the helm and pulled the sliding windows shut all around them and turned on the heat. “I guess boats are really meant to only go out in the summer.”

  “We’ll be fine. I checked the forecast, and there isn’t a storm in sight. I’ll keep watch.” Once Graham was out of the no-wake zone, he pulled the throttle and picked up speed. Rennie longed to feel the wind in her hair, so she went outside, closing herself off from Graham. She stood at the bow, with her hands gripping the railing, and screamed until her throat hurt, hoping Graham couldn’t hear her.

  TWENTY

  It took about an hour to reach the marina. Rennie helped when they came to the dock, pushing the buoys out to protect the boat, and while Graham fueled it up, she went inside and started to shop. He found her down one of the four aisles, with a basket resting on her arm. Graham went to take it from her and hold it, because as soon as you put one item in, those metal bars dug into your skin, making them unbearable to carry.

  “Why’s it empty?” he asked.

  “Everything is jacked up in price,” she whispered as her eyes darted toward the front. Graham chuckled lightly at her obvious concern that the clerk would overhear her.

  “Once you leave the mainland, prices skyrocket. I’m glad you didn’t see what I just spent on gas, because your eyes would’ve bugged out.”

  “I’ll pay for everything this weekend,” she said.

  “You will not. We can be a team. Go Dutch. Is going Dutch still used these days?”

  Rennie laughed. “I don’t even remember using that term. Wait, doesn’t that mean . . .” Her eyes went wide, and she slapped Graham on the shoulder. “That’s gross.”

  “What?” he asked, as if he had no idea what she referred to. “Do you remember—”

  “No, I’m not playing the do-you-remember game. You boys were gross in high school.”

  Graham laughed. He took the empty basket from Rennie and grabbed her hand with his free one. He stopped at the stand near the door and set the basket down and walked toward the deli counter,

  “Okay, this is more my speed, but what will we do for food later?”

  “We’ll get some sandwiches, grab a few things to tide us over on the ride out, and we’ll shop when we get on the island.”

  Rennie leaned into Graham. She placed her lips on his shoulder and kissed him. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Graham Cracker.”

  Graham put his arm around Rennie and pulled her close. He pressed his lips to her forehead and held her there for a moment. “You’ll never have to know, Ren. I’ll always be here for you.” He spoke the truth. They may have been out of touch for a goo
d chunk of time, but now that they’d found their way back to each other, being in Rennie’s life made sense to him.

  They placed their orders, and while they waited, they picked out a bag of chips and grabbed a couple of waters and a few pops, and Graham tossed in a box of cookies for good measure.

  Back on the boat, Graham went to the cockpit and started the engine. As he backed away from the dock, Rennie lifted the buoys and set them on the deck.

  “Can they stay out?”

  “Yeah, might as well, because we’re not anchoring; we’re docking.”

  Rennie worked in the galley, putting their sandwiches and chips onto plates, and brought everything over to where Graham was. She sat next to him in a seat that was meant for one person and maybe a small toddler. Graham didn’t care, because he enjoyed her company and they had always been like this, back before they grew up and became adults with real-life problems.

  “Sorry, I know this isn’t ideal.”

  “It’s perfect,” he said to her. He set his plate down on the compass display, his bottle of water in the drink holder, and picked up a quarter of his sandwich.

  “I thought it would be easier to eat if the halves were smaller.”

  She was right. It was easier. “Thank you.”

  They ate in silence for the most part. Rennie would point out another boat or tell him she saw a whale, but the built-in sonar wasn’t showing anything on the screen. He wouldn’t tell her that, of course. If she thought there was a sea animal out there, and there might have been, he was going to let her believe it.

  When they had finished, she got up and took his plate to the galley. He would glance over his shoulder every so often and wonder how things could have been different for them if life had gone their way. He saw her in ways no one else ever would, and despite the fact she was with him, cruising their way out into the middle of nowhere, he wasn’t about to let himself think things were completely over between her and Theo. They fought; that was what Graham kept telling himself. By tomorrow, Graham expected his friend to ask him to take her back to Cape Harbor so she could not only buy a new cell phone but find Theo. And he would because she asked.