“Have you talked to Madeline since dinner?” It was a random question for him to ask, but I appreciated the distraction. A normal conversation helped make this whole situation feel a lot less weird.
“Yeah, she called me to see if I wanted to have dinner with her and some of the other women this weekend while you guys are traveling.”
“Oh nice. That will be fun.”
It was really nice of her to reach out. She could have just had Chloe ask, so it meant a lot to me that she would make the effort.
“Yeah, where are you guys going again?”
I knew it was Colorado, but I couldn’t think of anything else to ask.
“Denver. We’ll only be there for one night.”
I smiled and looked up at him. I heard clicking behind me, but I pushed it out of my head. “So, I only have to miss you for a little while.”
He looked surprised but quickly recovered. “Yeah baby.”
He leaned down and kissed my forehead and I pretty much died right there. In front of him and our entourage.
Who knew a kiss over a beanie could be so amazing? I was embarrassed by how much I enjoyed it. I hadn’t been kissed in over a year.
That realization made me pause. Had it really been that long? Life had picked up. I’d been busy, but surely it hadn’t been a year.
I thought back. It was senior year. Before the holiday break. Yeah. Over a year.
“You okay?”
I nodded and kept walking. Words had left my brain. I knew how to speak, right? Had his kiss caused brain damage?
Focus Colby!
“Um… Do you want to get a coffee or hot chocolate?”
He grinned. “Of course.”
His smile reassured me. This was Noah. My friend. I blew out a breath and smiled. “They better have sugar free.”
He laughed and changed our direction. “I saw a little shop this way.”
“Is it this cold in Vancouver?”
“It’s close to the coast, so it doesn’t get quite as cold, but it snows.”
“Do you miss it?”
He shrugged, bringing my hand up with his. “A little bit. I miss my family.”
“I’m sorry. When was the last time you got to see them?”
He looked away. “The draft.”
That was almost two years ago. “I’m sorry.”
He shrugged. “It’s the life I choose. I moved around so much as a teen for different teams that I haven’t really lived at home since I was about fourteen.”
“Wow. I knew you were in the major juniors, but I didn’t make the connection of what that would mean for you.”
“I was home for the summers, but even then, I was off at camps or training with specialized coaches.”
“That must have been hard as a kid.”
He nodded. “I grew up fast.”
“Yet, you need help grocery shopping?”
He laughed. “I had people around to help with that kind of stuff. I haven’t ever lived completely on my own. Back in Boise I lived with three other players. I contributed to the grocery fund and they took care of shopping.”
“Oh Noah. That’s pathetic. I have so much to teach you.”
He turned a corner, then opened the door for me to a small café. Luckily, our shadows didn’t follow us in, so we had a short break.
When we got to the counter he turned to me. “What would you like?”
“Oh. I can get it myself.”
He shot me a look. “The cameras are on us. I can’t have my girlfriend buy her own drink. Plus, I wouldn’t have you do that anyway. I asked you out. I pay.”
“This is out? Like a date?”
He nodded. “Yeah. It’s our first date.”
That made me smile. It was a simple date, but it was perfect. Once we got our drinks we went back outside.
“I saw a sign for the aviary, do you want go?”
I froze. He was a few steps ahead when he realized I wasn’t next to him. He turned around and gave me a weird look.
“What’s wrong?”
I started shaking my head and closed my eyes. I needed to calm down. No freaking out with multiple cameras pointed at me.
“I’d rather not go.” I opened my eyes to see his narrow. He took a few steps closer to me.
“Okay, that’s fine. We don’t have to.”
I nodded, not trusting my voice to speak without shaking. He came closer and put his hands on my shoulders. “What’s wrong?”
I swallowed and looked up to his eyes. “I don’t like birds.”
I expected him to laugh or at least smile. He didn’t, he pulled me closer and wrapped his arms around me, resting his head on mine. “I finally found a weakness. I was getting worried. I thought maybe you were perfect.”
I laughed into his chest. I appreciated him being understanding and not making fun of me. Trying to take my mind off it helped.
“I know it’s lame, but I’ve had a real fear of them for as long as I could remember.”
“Then we’ll stay far, far away.”
He kissed the top of my head and moved to the side, still keeping an arm draped over my shoulder. I missed feeling him around me. That was the closest we’ve been, and I liked it. Probably a little too much.
This was fake. We weren’t really together. The clicking of the cameras behind us reminded me of that.
“Let’s go take a look at the pond.”
“It’s frozen.”
He rubbed my arm. “All the more reason to check it out. We can come back in the spring to see the difference.”
He thought we would still be together in the spring?
Wait. Of course, I was his personal assistant. I would still be around, but that didn’t mean we would be an us, a couple.
He placed his arm around my shoulders, pulling me in. We’d only gone a few steps when he paused and looked at me. A smile tugged at his lips a split second before he bent down and kissed me. Again.
I was frozen. His hand left my shoulder and cupped my cheek. That was enough to break me out of the fog. I lifted my arms and wrapped them around his neck.
The kiss deepened, and my knees turned to mush. This was too much. He was too much.
Kissing a client shouldn’t feel like this.
It shouldn’t come as naturally as breathing.
He pulled back and smiled. “Sorry. I couldn’t resist.”
I wanted to tell him to take it easy, but words were hard. My brain was off on cloud nine.
Part of me wanted to distance myself. Protect myself from the impending heartbreak and pain, but the longer I was around Noah the harder that would be.
He was kind, and thoughtful, and saw me. He didn’t think of me as an employee. He didn’t think I was plain. He seemed interested in me as a person.
That should be enough.
But each day, I wanted more.
I pushed that thought away. It couldn’t happen. It wouldn’t. We were living in different worlds. We could be friends, but anything more than that was unrealistic.
“The pond’s right over here.” He led me along the path until he stopped us at a bench overlooking the pond.
It was frozen, covered with a thin layer of snow. The plants around it were dead and there were no cute ducks around. But it was beautiful. Serene.
I scooted closer to him, for warmth of course.
He put his arm around me, it was so easy to let myself melt into him. “See, this is nice.”
I nodded and forced myself to think about anything other than how hard his body was. “It is.”
He looked around for a minute before facing me. “What do you want to do with your life?”
I chuckled and turned enough to look at him. “What do you mean? I’m already in a career.”
He shrugged, looking ahead, not at me. “True. I plan on being a hockey player for as long as I physically can, but that’s fifteen, maybe twenty years at most. I don’t know what I want to do after that.”
I watched him. H
is focus was somewhere far away. “Well, you could coach or host a show or run a foundation. You could still get a degree if you wanted. You could do anything.”
“Maybe you’re right. I just never thought past playing. Now I’m here.”
“So, enjoy the moment.”
He was quiet for a little while. “Do you want children?”
That caught me off guard. “I’m not sure. I guess I always assumed I would, but now that I’m at a point in my life where it’s a real possibility, I’m not sure. I couldn’t do my job with a child. I’d have to put it in daycare, which is fine. But I worry I would miss out on things.”
“Neither of your parents were home, right?”
“No, they both worked.”
“Do you feel like you missed out? Or they did?”
I looked down at my hands. “Yeah, but they were pretty good about being there for major things.”
“That’s what matters.”
I nudged him. “What about you? Do you want kids?”
“I think so. At least one.”
“How many siblings do you have?”
“Two. An older brother and a younger one.”
I smiled. “You’re the middle child?”
“Yeah.” I could hear the smile in his voice.
“You miss them?”
“I really do. I feel like I’m missing so much of their lives. We’ve always been as close as we could be, with the distance, but it’s different now that we’re older.
“Me too. My sister was my best friend growing up.”
“And now?”
“Now she has her own family.”
“You miss her.”
I was surprised he noticed. “Yeah, I don’t see her as much as I’d like.”
“Why not?”
“My job is to manage other people’s lives. That doesn’t give me a lot of time to take vacations or time off. Before that I was in school and didn’t have the money to fly home.”
“Growing up sucks.”
I laughed. “It really does. No one tells you when you’re a kid or in school the harsh reality of what life is like.”
Not that I would have changed any of my decisions. I loved what I did. I loved my college experience. Growing up was an unavoidable part of life and even though it was hard, and a little bit scary, it was worth it.
He was quiet again, and after a moment I looked up at him to find him watching me. When our eyes connected he smiled.
“You’re different from what I expected.”
“What do you mean?”
“When Bryce told me I was getting a PA I thought it would be some stuffy guy who was on his phone all the time and ignored me. I wasn’t expecting you.”
I smiled and looked away. “I wasn’t really expecting someone like you either.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. Bryce told me there was a new player who needed some help. I was expecting some eighteen-year-old punk who would spend all his money in a week. I thought I would have to babysit, you know, more than I already am.”
He laughed and squeezed me closer. “Wow. Harsh.”
I fell against him with a laugh.
“But I'm not like that?”
“Well, you’re more than that.” I paused, not knowing if I should tell him what I was thinking. It wasn’t exactly within the bounds of a professional relationship. “I think of you as a friend.”
I watched for a reaction, but he gave none. He just looked into my eyes. “I think you might be one of my first real friends.”
“Really?”
He nodded. “I don’t let people in very often, but with you I didn’t stand a chance. You bulldozed into my world and planted yourself there.”
“Do you mind?” I teased a bit.
“Not at all. I can’t picture my life without you now.”
“That’s just because I buy your food.”
He smiled and shook his head. “It’s a little bit more than that.”
I felt breathless. “Really?”
He nodded and slowly, painfully slow, he lowered his head and tilted my chin up with his hand. Our lips met, and a sudden warmth spread through my body. I sighed and leaned into him, needing to feel closer.
His lips were soft, gentle, but met mine with a passion I hadn’t expected.
The sound of cameras filled my ears and I pulled back.
Of course.
How could I have been so stupid? That wasn’t real. He was doing it for their benefit.
I turned my head and looked up to keep the tears from escaping. How could I have forgotten? How did I get so wrapped up in the moment?
I was so stupid.
None of this was real. It was all for show.
“We shouldn’t do that.” I barely got the words out without my voice cracking.
He leaned forward, trying to meet my eyes, but I looked away. “We shouldn’t kiss.”
“You’re supposed to be my girlfriend. We agreed it was part of the rules. ”
This was the worst idea ever. I thought I could fake it. I thought I could go through with this, but I was an idiot. There was more between us than just work. I could feel it. I knew he could too.
Maybe I was lying to myself. Maybe it was all one sided.
“Fine, but at least warn me next time.” I stood and started walking back to his building. The stupid cameras were there, waiting. I smiled so they didn’t think we’d just fought and waited for Noah to catch up. I couldn’t storm off. That would make things look bad, and I wasn’t ready to do damage control.
He put his arm around me and continued walking. “I’m sorry, Colby. I promise not to kiss you again without your permission.”
I didn't want that. I didn’t want to have to tell him when and where it was okay. I wanted to kiss him now, and five minutes from now, and tomorrow. But this wasn’t going to work without boundaries.
Kissing him had been the best and worst thing to happen to me. It showed me how much I felt about him, but it reminded me that none of this is real.
I waited until we were close to the front doors before speaking. I didn't want any of the paparazzi to overhear. “We’ll just have to be respectful of each other. I don’t want either of us getting hurt.”
“Why would we get hurt?” He held the door open for me and I stepped inside.
“Hopefully, we won’t.” I forced a smiled and walked to the elevator. I really, really hoped we could do this without me breaking.
Chapter Eleven
Noah
I was worried after the day at the park that things between me and Colby would be awkward, but she went on like nothing had happened. Nothing. Like no walk, no moments, no kiss.
She was back to business and I wasn’t sure I liked it, but I didn't want to hurt her. That was the last thing I wanted.
I needed to ask her. To make sure we were on the same page, but I didn’t know how to bring it up.
I left for practice without seeing her. She normally came by in the mornings, but she left me a message that she was running errands and would be at practice. Even though it seemed valid enough, I felt like she was avoiding me.
There was nothing I could do about it now. I had to push her out of my mind and focus on practice.
After I got to the arena and put on my pads, I was one of the first on the ice. I wanted to warm up a bit since these practices were still killing me.
I was on my second sprint when Coach Rust walked onto the ice and waved me over. I stopped in front of him, feeling a bit of trepidation.
“Morning, Coach.”
“Noah, Coach Romney wanted to have a word with you before practice. Would you mind coming with me?”
“Of course.” I followed him off the ice and slapped on my blade protectors before walking through the tunnels with him. He didn’t give me any hints of what Coach wanted to talk about. No smile or frown. Nothing. His face was completely blank, and I couldn’t figure out what that meant. Was I in trouble? Was I getting kicked off the te
am? My NHL career had lasted one game. That had to be a new record.
He pushed opened the door to the office and gestured for me to enter. I did, and he shut the door behind me.
“Noah, how are you?”
I looked at Coach sitting behind his desk for any sign of his mood. He was too hard to read.
“I’m good, sir.”
“Good. Go ahead and take a seat.”
I moved in front of one of the chairs and sat down. I rubbed my hands over my thighs and waited.
“I wanted to tell you that we’ve noticed how much work you’re putting in. It hasn’t been all smooth, but your dedication has never wavered.”
“Thank you, sir.” I swallowed and waited for the inevitable ‘but’.
“The guys have been talking about you, too.”
Oh no. I knew going to dinner with them was a mistake. I ran through that night at fast forward, trying to remember what I could have said or done. Had I offended Madeline somehow?
“They’ve been impressed with your dedication and the skills you’ve displayed during practice and the last game.”
Wait, this was good news? They liked me?
“Grant sustained a minor sprain yesterday during practice.”
My heart stopped beating. He was one of the defensemen from the first line. This wasn’t happening.
“We’re moving you to the first line.”
No. Way. I was starting? I’d be on with Brassard, Hartman, Murray, and Schultz. There was no way.
“Really?”
I knew I sounded like an inexperienced rookie, but I was. This was amazing. I never would have thought I would get to this point. Not for a few years.
“Yes, Noah. You’re going to be practicing with the first line and starting with them in this weekend’s game.”
I stood and extended my hand. “Thank you, sir. I won’t let you down.”
He smiled, just a fraction of an inch, but I saw it. “I know you won’t. Now get back out there. Practice is starting.”
I nodded and walked out of his office feeling like I’d just won the lottery. I was floating. Nothing. Absolutely nothing could be better than this.
I wanted to go to the locker room and send Colby a text. I wanted her to know. I knew she would celebrate with me. She knew how big this was.
Line Change: Utah Fury Hockey Book Three Page 8
