by Wu Cheng-En
“Brother,” said the third demon, “perhaps he can eat up some bits and pieces, but I don't know where is he going to set up his pan.”
“The collar bone is an ideal stand,” replied Monkey.
“This is terrible,” said the third demon. “If he sets up his pan and lights a fire won't the smoke get into your nose and make you sneeze?”
“That'll be no problem,” said Monkey with a laugh. “I'll use my gold-banded cudgel to push a hole through his skull. That'll be a skylight for me and serve as a chimney too.”
The old demon heard this and was most alarmed despite saying that he was not afraid. All he could do was to summon up his courage and call, “Don't be scared, brothers. Bring me some of that drugged wine. When I down a few goblets of that the drugs will kill the monkey.”
At this Monkey smiled to himself and thought, “When I made havoc in Heaven five hundred years ago I drank the Jade Emperor's wine and ate Lord Lao Zi's elixir, the Queen Mother's peaches, the marrow of phoenix bones and dragon livers. I've eaten everything. What kind of drugged wine could do me any harm?”
By then the junior devils had strained two jugfuls of drugged wine, a goblet of which they handed to the senior demon chief, who took it in his hands.
Monkey, who could smell it from inside the demon's belly, called out, “Don't give it to him!” The splendid Great Sage then tipped his head back and turned it into the bell of a trumpet that he placed wide open below the demon's throat. The demon gulped the wine down noisily and Monkey noisily received it. The demon swallowed the second cupful and Monkey noisily drank that too. This went on till Monkey had drunk all of the seven or eight cupfuls that the demon downed.
“That's enough,” the demon said, putting the goblet down. “Normally my stomach feels as if it's on fire after a couple of cups of this wine,” he said, “but this time my face hasn't even gone red after seven or eight.”
Now the Great Sage was not a heavy drinker, so after taking these seven or eight cupfuls he started to act drunk in the demon's stomach, propping himself up, falling flat on his face, kicking about him, swinging on the demon's liver, doing headstands and somersaults, and dancing wildly. This caused the monster such unbearable pain that he collapsed.
If you don't know whether he lived or died listen to the explanation in the next installment.
***
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Document creation date: 13.12.2008
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