by J. L. Wilder
“So you ran away?”
“I was afraid that I would hurt someone,” Ryker explained. “I was a ticking time bomb. I couldn’t have that around our children.”
She nodded. “I understand,” she said, kissing his cheekbone. “But you can’t ever do that again. Promise you won’t.”
“It won’t ever be an issue again,” Ryker said. “It’s like we’ve been saying. There’s no one left to threaten us, which means you’re not going to get kidnapped again. Nothing is going to happen that would trigger that kind of anger in me.”
“Something will,” Sophie countered. “Eventually, something will make you angry. Everyone gets angry. And when that happens, you have to promise me that you’ll find a way to stay calm and stay with the family. You have to. You can’t run away again.”
“I would have stayed,” Ryker said. “You know I didn’t leave out of a lack of care for them. If anything, it was the opposite.”
“I know,” Sophie said. “But you’re the founding member of this family, Ryker. And you’re right, I probably won’t be kidnapped again. But what if something else happens? What if I die?”
Ryker looked as if he’d been punched. “You’re not going to die,” he said, his arms tightening around her.
“Probably not,” she agreed. “But how can I get by unless I know that my children are completely safe and cared for by their family? They need you. I know how much you love them, Ryker. I know you only left because you were afraid to put them at risk. But I need you to be the kind of man who won’t put them at risk.” She touched his face. “And you already are that man,” she added. “I know you. I trust you with my life. I trust you with my babies’ lives. You have to trust yourself.”
“You really trust me?” Ryker asked her.
She smiled at him. “You know I do,” she said. “You were my first alpha, Ryker. You and I were the first two members of this pack. Before there was anyone else, there was us.”
“That’s true,” he said. “Even if it was only a few days before the others showed up.”
“But we were alone before,” Sophie said. “We were both alone. And we both chose, together, to leave that behind, to trust somebody else with our lives. Yes, you imprinted on me, but it was more than that. I saw something in you that day. When I met you, I believed for the first time that it would be possible for me to survive in the wild.”
“I guess my record for keeping you safe isn’t that great so far,” Ryker said.
“You’re wrong,” Sophie said. “All right, yeah, I’ve gotten into some dangerous situations, I’ll grant you that. But you’ve always gotten me out of them. If it wasn’t for you—and Marco and Burton—I would be dead several times over.”
She could tell by the expression on his face that he knew she was right, even if he didn’t want to admit it.
“I know you’ll keep me safe,” she said. “And I know you’ll always keep our family safe—even from your own anger, if necessary. Just don’t leave. Promise you won’t ever leave.”
He pulled her down and kissed her again, and the kiss felt like reassurance and safety and home all rolled into one. Sophie let herself linger there, taking comfort from it.
When she finally drew back, he was gazing up at her with something like reverence in his eyes.
“You don’t have to worry,” he said solemnly, stroking her cheek with his fingertips. “I’ll never leave this family. I promise.”
Chapter Eighteen
SOPHIE
“I swear,” Burton said, tracing his fingertips over the swollen parts of Sophie’s body, “I think you’re twice as big now as the last time you were pregnant.”
“I feel twice as big,” she murmured, eyes closed, reveling in the sensation of him touching her. Her whole body was so sensitive when she was pregnant. She felt like a live wire.
Burton eased her legs apart and slid down her body, sealing his mouth against her. She sighed as the rough flat of his tongue pressed up against her, her hips rocking up to meet his mouth.
“Easy,” he murmured. “Don’t hurt yourself.” She was so weighed down by this pregnancy that they had decided it was for the best if she didn’t try to move until she gave birth.
But how could she help it when he was tormenting her like this. She took deep breaths and focused on relaxing her muscles, trying to hold still.
He looked up from between her legs, grinning at her. “I can make it an order, if you want,” he said. “If you think that would help you.”
Of course it would help. If he made it an order, she would have no choice but to stay still. His will would freeze her in place.
But she didn’t want that. She wanted to prove to him that she could do what he had asked of her without being compelled. “No,” she said. “You don’t have to do that.”
“Are you sure?” he asked. “You can stay still?”
“I can stay still.”
“Because I don’t want the babies to get hurt.”
“They won’t,” she promised.
“And I don’t want you to get hurt either. You know how Marco worries about putting too much strain on your body.” Burton was still grinning. It was something he and Sophie had joked about over the past few weeks—the way Marco worried every time Sophie sat up or reached for something. He seemed not to want her to move so much as a muscle.
“We don’t want to upset Marco,” Sophie breathed, her heart pounding. Burton’s thumb had begun tracing circles on her inner thigh.
“No, we don’t,” he agreed. “Who knows whether or not he’ll let us have time together again before the babies are born if he finds out we’ve done something he disapproves of. And he’d definitely disapprove of me letting you wiggle around like you were.”
“These babies are going to be here any minute anyway,” Sophie pointed out. She was roughly thirty-seven weeks into her pregnancy, which was already longer than she had carried her first litter, and it was hard to see how she was going to be able to go much longer without giving birth.
“You never know,” Burton said. “You might have a few more days left in you. And you know I can’t go a few days without you.”
“You’re insatiable,” she said.
“You have only yourself to blame for that.” He inhaled deeply, as though taking in the scent of a bouquet, and then tasted her, his tongue moving slowly.
Sophie felt a shudder of delight pass through her, but she forced herself to lie still.
He raised his head again. “If you weren’t so delectable,” he said, “maybe I would be able to resist you.”
“I don’t want you to resist,” she said quietly.
“We’re in agreement, then.” He pushed her legs wider apart, giving him better access to her.
Her stomach was so large that she couldn’t see what he was doing down there, but she could feel it, of course. The way his tongue continued to work her over as his fingers slipped inside her, stroking her gently, almost as if his hand was making a request. It was all she could do not to respond, not to rock her hips into the gesture.
Instead, she lay as still as she could and focused on her breathing.
And the pleasure mounted.
When she had the freedom to move, it was easy to fall into the habit of pursuing her orgasm, chasing the moment of release. But today, she had no choice but to wait for it to come to her. It built in waves, crescendos and decrescendos, accelerating and slowing, and she knew that he was doing it on purpose. He was deliberately driving her mad.
She could have cried, but she forced herself not to say anything. Not to make a sound. That was the one thing that was still fully under her control.
She couldn’t help fisting her hands as he pressed his tongue firmly against her, as she felt herself throbbing in his mouth. He held still there for an agonizing minute, giving her no friction, no relief. No release. Sophie was sure he could feel the blood pulsing through her, causing her to swell and grow sensitive to his every touch.
Then
again, she had been so sensitive lately that she had been ready for this moment as soon as he had lain down beside her.
As soon as he moved his tongue, she was going to come. She was so close.
And all it would take would be a quick twitch of her hips to get herself there. By the time he knew what she had done, it would be over. She would have what she wanted so badly. She could take it, right now.
But he’s testing me.
She breathed out slowly, holding herself absolutely still.
And Burton dragged his tongue slowly upward until the tip flicked against her, coming into contact just as her orgasm crashed over her.
Then she was screaming, fingers clawing at the floor of the cave, and Burton’s lips were sealed around her, sucking desperately, pulling every last ounce of pleasure from her body until she lay trembling, clenched tight around the fingers that were still buried deep within her.
She kept her eyes squeezed shut as he withdrew, knowing that this wasn’t yet over, that he had more to give her. And sure enough, she felt the warm weight of him settle behind her as he rolled her onto her side. She felt him nudging up against her, his body as desperate to be inside her as she was to have him there. She felt as hot and dizzy as if she were running a fever.
“Burton,” she murmured. Alpha.
He entered her slowly. Somehow, despite the fact that her alphas had hardly left her alone over the past few weeks, despite the fact that there had almost always been someone to fill her up and make her feel complete, she still craved him. She would have spent every moment of her pregnancy astride one of her alphas, if it had been possible.
“How do any omegas do this with only one alpha?” she asked, her voice raspy and broken, as his hips came flush against her. “How does anyone get through pregnancy with just one man?”
“I don’t know,” Burton said, tracing a hand down the length of her arm, wrapping her fingers in his. “I know what you mean. Right now, it feels like I could lay here with you for a solid week and never get enough, but at some point, I have to sleep. And you never do seem to stop wanting it.”
“Not when I’m pregnant,” she agreed. “My hormones must be...must be crazy. Totally out of control.”
He began to move inside her. “Remember last week?” he asked. “You fell asleep while I was fucking you.”
She nodded. “You asked me if you should stop, but I begged you to stay.”
“I’m glad,” he said. “It would have killed me to leave.”
“I dreamed of you the whole time,” she said. “Maybe I was only half asleep. But God, you should always fuck me when I sleep.”
“You wouldn’t be able to sleep,” he murmured, pressing his lips against her shoulder. “You only fell asleep that time because you’d been awake for so long, and because your pregnancy is tiring you out.”
“I don’t feel tired now,” she whispered.
His arms wrapped around her, his hands coming to rest on her breasts. He drew small circles with his thumbs around her nipples, and she groaned, feeling them begin to pucker and grow hard.
“I love how your breasts feel when you’re pregnant,” he said. “So fucking heavy. You’re so beautiful.”
He began to stroke her nipples. Sophie felt her eyes roll back in her head.
Burton groaned, his hips stuttering. “You’re going to kill me, Soph,” he said. “Fuck, I love you so much.”
She felt her muscles tightening up. “Please don’t stop, Burton. Please.”
He pinched her nipples and rolled them between his fingers and thumbs. His hips found their rhythm again, fucking her harder, taking her deeper. “Oh, God,” he groaned. “I’m gonna come, Sophie.”
They fell over the edge together, incomprehensible noises and grasping hands, both of them pressing their bodies together where they were joined as forcefully as they could in an attempt to become even more a part of one another.
Then it was over, and Burton slipped free of her, his hand on her hip, his face pressed into her back.
Even at that moment, the loss of him inside her left her feeling empty. She knew Marco or Ryker would come soon, and that they would take his place and she would be satisfied once more, but these intervals were always painful.
She reached back and took his hand. “Thank you,” she said quietly.
“Thank you,” he countered. “That was amazing. That was just what I needed.”
“Was it?”
“You know it was,” he said. “You know how I can’t stand to be without you, Sophie. I would do this all the time if there was any way my body could keep up. I would skip sleeping and eating to be with you.”
She chuckled. “Don’t do that,” she said. “I need you strong.”
“Because how else am I going to handle these babies, once they arrive?” he agreed.
“Speaking of which,” she said, “where are the other children?”
“The nine? They’re out with Cam and Petra playing some kind of game in the clearing.”
“A game?” Sophie shook her head. “They’re not even two years old. What kind of game could they be playing?”
“I don’t know. Group hide and seek?” Burton shrugged. “But it’s good for Cam and Petra to practice with them. I’m glad they’re spending time with the kids.”
Sophie agreed. Though Petra was only in the third month of her own pregnancy and had barely begun to show yet, she knew she wasn’t the only one reassured by the thought that both Cam and Petra would have plenty of parenting experience by the time their baby came along. They had both mentioned to her how grateful they were that she so often allowed them to spend time with her babies, to practice their skills.
“They’re going to be amazing parents,” she said.
“And they’ll have us to help them,” Burton said. “Not that they’ll need it, especially.”
“You don’t think so?” Sophie asked.
“Even if they were the worst parents in the world—and they won’t be—they’re only going to have one child. That seems easy to me.”
“You’re probably right,” Sophie agreed. “But remember what it was like when our first litter was born? It was overwhelming. Everything in our lives changed in the blink of an eye. Everything that was important before suddenly came second to protecting the babies. Every decision each of us has made since then—even Ryker running away from the pack—has been with the babies’ best interests in mind. We’ve had to completely change the way we think of the world. And Cam and Petra will have to do that too.”
“I think they’re ready for it,” Burton said. “After seeing the way becoming parents affected the four of us, I’m sure they can handle it.”
Sophie smiled. “You’re right,” she said. “And it will be fun to watch them grow their little family within the larger family of the pack.”
“Someday, maybe their child will mate with one of ours,” Burton suggested. “And then the pack can grow even more.”
It was a thought Sophie liked. When she looked into the future, she could see nothing but question marks for most of her children. Would they be able to find love the way she had? Would they be able to find mates—perhaps southern wolves who had come north, looking for something other than the life they had known? Or perhaps wolves who had been feral all their lives and were ready to be tamed by a lover?
She hoped so. She hoped her children would be able to find love, as she had. As her alphas had, and as Petra and Cam had. Being imprinted upon, finding her mates, was the defining experience of Sophie’s life. Even if she had managed to survive the wild on her own, she knew that the life she would have eked out for herself would never have been as rich or as fulfilling as the life she had with her pack was.
This was what she wanted for her children. Love and family.
She hoped they would be able to find it.
She started to roll over toward Burton, but he stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. “No moving,” he said, mock sternly. “I thought we had an agreeme
nt.”
“I want to be able to see you,” she protested.
He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and eased her over slowly, first onto her back, then onto her other side so that she was facing him. He pushed the blankets into position around her so that she had some support. “Is this comfortable?” he asked.
“As comfortable as anything is,” she said. She hadn’t found a fully comfortable position in which to lie in weeks, but with the help of her alphas, she did the best she could.
He scooted in close to her, cupped the palm of his hand behind her head, and kissed her gently. She surrendered to his lips, knowing that she would allow him to do whatever he wanted with her.
He was her alpha. He could have her any way he wanted her, and she would always submit to him. She would always be his.
He pulled back and looked her in the eyes. “Have I told you lately how much I love you?” he asked.
“You might have mentioned it,” she allowed with a smile.
“Well, I love you,” he said. “Don’t ever doubt it. I’ve never regretted joining this pack. And when you went missing, I knew that there was no way you’d left willingly. I knew that I had to go and find you.”
“Seems like you’re the only one who did,” Sophie said.
“Don’t blame them for not understanding right away.” Burton cupped her cheek. “We were all overwhelmed. No one wanted to believe you had been taken. Maybe it was just too much for Ryker and Marco to accept. Maybe they needed to believe you had left of your own free will, because at least that would mean you were still okay.”
Sophie nodded. “Maybe so,” she allowed. “I guess that would be easier to live with. I know I’d rather think one of you had left me willingly than that you had been forced away, even if it hurt me to let you go.”
Burton nodded. “But the important thing is that we’re all back together now,” he said. “And nothing will ever tear us apart again.”
And once more, he leaned in to kiss her.
Chapter Nineteen
BURTON
