‘I expect nothing less from you. I’m surprised you haven’t given me a list of ways to make sure we use them correctly.’ She ducked her face at his teasing tone. ‘Hey, what did I say?’
‘Nothing. You’re right. I do want to be safe.’ She knew all too well the catastrophic consequences of taking a chance with contraception, how easily a spontaneous moment could ruin a life. She had no intention of repeating the same mistake, no matter how romantic the setting, how seductive the man. She looked up and forced a smile, but he wasn’t fooled.
‘What’s wrong?’
‘Nothing. I’m fine.’ She grabbed the bag of pastries. ‘These look amazing, thank you.’
Leo’s eyes darkened. ‘You don’t have to tell me, Anna, but neither do you have to pretend. Don’t lie. Not to me. I thought we were honest with each other.’
He was right. She didn’t have to tell him anything. But last night he had bared his soul to her. Didn’t she owe him a secret in return? A balancing of the scales between them? ‘I wasn’t always careful,’ she said eventually. ‘I believed someone when he said it would be fine. Although I was old enough to know better. I just wanted to be the kind of person who took a risk. A different Anna.’ She couldn’t look at him, all her focus on the paper bag, the pastry crumbling under her nervous touch.
‘There’s nothing wrong with this Anna. You don’t need to change a thing. And if he thought so then he didn’t deserve you.’
The controlled anger in his voice steadied her, and for the first time in a long while Anna wanted to confide in someone. Maybe then she could finally heal. Finally move on. And this man who had shared so much with her, who she would never see again once their time was over, was here, asking for her trust. She swallowed, putting the pastries to one side and finally looking up to meet his eyes. ‘His name was Sebastian. You remind me of him in some ways. He was rich, entitled, arrogant, supremely confident. I thought he was Mr Darcy and every Georgette Heyer rake and Lord Peter Wimsey all rolled into one.’
‘Is he the man you fell in love with?’
He’d remembered. ‘The man I was so infatuated with,’ she corrected him. ‘I’d spent my whole life being careful, Leo. Sensible. Things were great when I was little. Dad found Mama’s scattiness endearing, and Mama loved the way he looked after her. But at some point they stopped being amused by each other. Rosa was still small, so I stepped into the role of peacemaker. I tried to make sure things were organised at home so Dad wouldn’t get cross, to cover up for Mama. I was so used to doing it that when she left I just carried on. I didn’t even leave home when I started university, still looking after Rosa, not that she wanted me to, or thanked me for it. And then I met Sebastian.’ Her voice faltered.
‘Your knight in shining armour?’
‘He swept me off my feet. Truth was he was unreliable, could behave appallingly, but I thought I could reform him. I might have been book-smart, but when it came to men I was a naïve fool. For three months I followed him around like a lapdog, did everything he wanted, never allowed myself to question how he treated me, how he acted with other people. Told myself I was living a more glamorous, exciting life, even though at heart I think his arrogant disdain for people not as privileged as him made me uncomfortable. Then I forgot to be careful...’
‘You got pregnant?’
‘I got pregnant.’ She stared at the sheet, remembering how terrified she had been, and yet so hopeful. Even excited. ‘I stupidly thought it might all be fine. That he loved me and that we could make a life together, that he would welcome me into his gilded world. Truth was he was already bored. I just didn’t want to see it. He walked away. A month later I miscarried.’ She took a deep breath as the memory of the darkness swirled through her mind. ‘I went to pieces. Blamed myself for it all. It took me a long time to get my life back, to forgive myself. I swore I would never be that foolish, that gullible, that reckless ever again.’
She took a deep breath. Last night she had wanted Leo to face some unpalatable truths; now it was time to face some of her own. ‘That time left its scars. I nearly lost my place at university, so I dug in, hid behind my studies. Became a scholar because I didn’t know who else to be, didn’t trust myself, trust my judgement. Told myself Dad needed me to stay at home. Truth is I needed him just as much. More.’
Leo sat down next to her, taking her hand in his. ‘You’re so brave, Anna, a survivor.’
‘I’m not.’ Was that really what he saw?
‘Brave, dangerous, compassionate. I’m so sorry that happened to you. That he happened to you.’
‘It was a long time ago.’ But she had been living with the consequences ever since, hiding away, behind her book, her title, her father’s illness. Who would she be if Sebastian hadn’t tainted her life?
Anna had no idea, but maybe it was time she found out.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
ANNA HEADED TOWARDS the villa, unable to believe it was time for the final checklist. Thanks to all the outside help and some truly Herculean efforts by the staff, every bungalow was ready. Fresh paint gleamed white in the late spring sun, the shutters and doors a fresh green contrast. The outside areas were all weeded, the greenery trimmed back to lush from jungle-like, and new cushions and umbrellas had been added to the cleaned and repaired outside tables. Inside looked just as good, every bungalow scrubbed surgically clean and dressed with new gossamer-thin white curtains, fresh white cotton bedding, crockery and artfully arranged mirrors and flower arrangements, keeping the look as simple as possible while adding the luxurious feel Valentina and her guests would expect from their living quarters. More importantly every toilet flushed, every shower worked perfectly and there wasn’t a single dripping tap anywhere on the island.
Although the guests could order food at any of the island’s three bars or two restaurants at any time of the day or night, Anna had also stocked the tiny kitchenettes with coffee machines and a range of exclusive herbal teas. Work was still continuing on the public areas, the last few boats and kayaks needed to be checked, the third tennis court to be resurfaced and Anna was still waiting for the cushions and throws she had ordered for the biggest bar, but the beach bars were rethatched and restocked, the breakfast courtyard was ready for their guests’ arrival, and the pagoda and central courtyard where the wedding and reception were to be held were nearly ready, fairy lights already strung through the surrounding trees.
They’d done a good job, she and Leo. Anna smiled just at the thought of his name, even though she knew she was heading for a fall. Attraction had turned to lust to trust and now she was already in far, far too deep, but she couldn’t, wouldn’t get out now even if someone threw her a lifeline.
She leaned against the doorframe to steady herself. God help her she was falling in love with Leo di Marquez. It was beyond foolish and she had no doubt it would end in her heartbreak, but some things were just meant to be and for once she wasn’t going to borrow trouble, she was going to enjoy every minute she had with Leo and let the future take care of itself.
But one thing she knew was absolute: Leo mustn’t know. She wasn’t his salvation, this wannabe bad boy’s redemption. They had made an agreement and she was going to stick to it. The only person to break her heart this time would be Anna herself. She had sworn that nobody else would ever have that power over her again.
‘You’re looking all doe-eyed. Does Señor Tall, Dark and Handsome have anything to do with that?’ A sardonic voice from the office made Anna stop and grit her teeth. They’d arrived back on La Isla Marina to find Rosa had breezed onto the island while they had gone and, true to form, was already right at home—Anna had seen her sister in a couple of intense conversations with their mysterious guest from which she’d emerged with flushed cheeks and sparkling eyes. It never took her sister much time to stake out her territory.
Not, Anna reflected, that it had taken too much time for her to get close to Leo.
Not that her sister needed to know that. She smiled as sweetly as she could. ‘None of your business.’
Rosa appeared at the office door and Anna’s teeth ground down even harder. How did her sister manage to look so effortlessly cool no matter what she was wearing? Her thick dark hair might look like Anna’s to the untrained eye, but Anna had never managed to get the hang of braids, let alone the thick fishtail plait Rosa had confined her glossy tresses in, strands hanging just so, as if it had been designed by some boho hairdressing genius. She was casual in jeans and a T-shirt, but still managed to look chic enough to walk into the ritziest party, Anna’s own shorts and T-shirt suddenly looking dowdy by comparison.
‘How’s the paperwork? Sorted out the wedding guests into rooms yet?’
It was Rosa’s turn to set her jaw. ‘I don’t understand why you’re being so stubborn. You love spreadsheets and solving problems. I love being outside and fixing things. We should just swap...’
‘If you’d hadn’t arrived over two weeks late then you could have had your pick of jobs. As it was I had to get on and do what needed doing most. You keep going with the wedding planning and helping Mama with the office. It’ll do you good to stretch yourself.’ Back then Anna would have jumped at the chance to swap responsibilities with Rosa, now she wanted to see the repairs and decorating through, proud of what she and Leo had achieved.
‘Of course you dropped everything and rushed straight here.’ The scorn in her sister’s voice hit Anna right in the gut, just where it always did.
‘It’s a good thing I did. Look at what your stand back and let them make their own mistakes plan has achieved. This place was chaos...’
‘Chaos until St Anna turned up and fixed it all?’
‘Yes. Actually.’ Besides, Rosa had turned up eventually; she must have felt a little guilty to have put her plans to one side.
‘Dragging Dad with you? Couldn’t trust him on his own for a month?’
‘Dad turned up on his own.’ Anna folded her arms. ‘You do know he nearly died?’ she said almost conversationally.
‘What?’ The smug look disappeared off Rosa’s face. ‘Nonsense, he looks fine.’
‘He looks fine now. He looks fine because he has no stress outside work, his meals are prepared, he takes his pills, he gets reminded to take regular walks. Not because I’m a saint, not because I’m a martyr, but because someone has to do it—and no.’ Anna raised her hand as Rosa tried to interrupt. ‘Don’t tell me he’s an adult, I know that. I also know that when he wants to be he’s the most organised man alive. But his health isn’t a priority, work is. And he would forget, just like Mama forgot to take care of the basics here. So what do I do, Rosa? Swan off to Harvard and let him get ill and Mama sink? Is that your answer?’ The offer for a semester at the prestigious university had recently been renewed, not that Anna had allowed herself to consider it, worry over her book, over her father making the move an impossibility.
‘I don’t understand.’ Rosa paled—as much as she could with a truly enviable tan. ‘I was ten before I realised other families didn’t get given their own individual holiday itineraries and checklists two weeks before they went on holiday, and most families didn’t stock check their cupboards monthly. How can he not remember to take his pills?’
‘Things changed after Mama left.’ Anna blew a frustrated breath. ‘You were still at home then, Rosa. I know how self-centred you are, but surely even you noticed?’ But then again maybe she hadn’t; after all, hadn’t Anna stepped in to run the household, juggling A-levels with housework and trying—trying and failing—to motivate her sister.
‘I know you got bossier and more self-righteous than ever. I know you refused to move into halls during term time, staying at home to prove what a good daughter you were. At least until you started seeing that guy, then suddenly we saw another side of Anna...until he dumped you, that is. Then you got even more boring than before.’
Anna’s chest tightened at the smirk on her sister’s face. Would things be different if she had confided in Rosa then? Confided in anyone? When had she decided it was safer keeping the rest of the human race at arm’s length, caring more about the lives of people long dead than those who walked next to her? Until the last couple of weeks, that was. Somehow she had found herself allowing Leo further in than anyone ever before. At least he was upfront with her. He always walked away. He didn’t want marriage, children, any emotional ties. That was fine with her. She wasn’t equipped for any of that either. How could she be when she had barely lived?
‘It’s always lovely catching up with you, Rosa, but I have a lot to do. Good luck with those spreadsheets.’ Anna turned, refusing to let the memories Rosa had stirred taint the sweet island air, the short time she had left with Leo. It would be nice if she and Rosa could spend ten minutes together without reverting to the squabbling children they had once been. It would be nice to have a sister, not an adversary.
‘I’m just worried about you, Anna.’ Rosa’s voice stopped her in her tracks. ‘Leo di Marquez isn’t the kind of man you’re used to...’
‘I’m more than capable of handling Leo, thank you,’ but even as she said it, Anna knew she wasn’t being completely honest. Not with her sister and certainly not with herself.
‘I just don’t want a repeat of the Sebastian situation. I mean, he was an utter idiot, and Leo doesn’t appear to be quite so arrogant, or as sleazy, but he broke you, Anna. I don’t want that to happen again.’
Anna swallowed as the tears rose up, hot and ready. She had sworn never to cry over Sebastian again, but it was harder not to cry for the girl she had been, the naïve little idiot who believed in love and happy ever afters. ‘Sebastian didn’t break me, Rosa. I did that all by myself.’
* * *
It all looked so beautiful it almost hurt Anna to walk across the island, knowing all this was just temporary, that her life would soon revert to libraries and lecture halls. Over the last few weeks Anna had been probably the happiest she had ever been and that happiness wasn’t just because of Leo. It was because the island felt like home. She loved putting it back together, planning for the future, knowing that everything she did made a difference. The thought of leaving physically hurt her.
But, if the island was home, then what was Oxford? Her old goals made no sense any more; she didn’t care about being a youthful success or how many papers she could author. She wanted something real. Leo was right: she needed to find her story, not try and create one.
Not much of Valentina’s lavish deposit was left, but the advance publicity had done wonders for bookings and it looked as if this would be the best summer for several years. Anna just hoped Sancia would be able to cope. At some point she would need to broach the island’s future with her mother, but not till after the wedding, not while she was still this Anna, the Anna who went sailing out into the sea every evening once work finished, the Anna who had actually swum nude the other evening, the Anna who fell asleep wrapped around a shirtless pirate.
‘Hey...’ Speaking of shirtless pirates.
‘Hey, yourself,’ Anna said, unable to stop the smile spreading over her face as she drank Leo in. His tan had intensified over the last few weeks, his muscles gleaming under his golden olive skin, his hair grown out so it flopped over his forehead, adding a boyishness to his good looks, a boyishness that in no way diminished his aura of danger. ‘Forgot your shirt again?’
‘I know you like me half naked.’
Anna’s knees weakened at the gleam in his eyes. She did prefer him like this, sweaty from the sun and manual labour, so different from the polished, fashionable playboy the world knew. ‘You do add a certain aesthetic appeal to the island.’
Leo’s grin broadened. ‘You look remarkably empty-armed. I thought you went searching for the Final Checklist Clipboard.’ Anna could hear the capitals in his teasing tones. Maybe she had put a lot of emphasis on just how importa
nt the checklist was.
‘The clipboard? Oh, yes. That. You know, I think we can just as easily do the last walk through in the morning.’
‘Oh?’ Leo arched an eyebrow. ‘You’ve changed your tune. I thought it was imperative we did that this afternoon or the whole timetable would go up in flames. What did you have in mind for the rest of the afternoon instead?’
‘We-ell. I was thinking we could be spontaneous...’
‘Spontaneous?’
‘You, me, the boat.’
‘Oh, that kind of spontaneous, mi cariño. Much as I was looking forward to inspecting every single one of the fifty-two bungalows, maybe I could be persuaded.’
Stepping closer, Anna ran a hand down his arm, enjoying the play of muscles under her fingertips, how soft his skin was, hot under her touch. ‘Not in public,’ she said softly. ‘Boat first, persuasion later.’
His eyes darkened, flickering lust heating her through. Anna loved how her words, how her touch could elicit this response, how powerful Leo made her feel. ‘Is that a promise, Anna?’
‘A definite promise—and you know I always keep my word.’
‘In that case,’ Leo said, taking her hand in his, ‘let’s go. Right now.’
Just a few more days... Anna intended to make the most of every single moment.
* * *
Leo knew that Valentina’s arrival would change things, he just hadn’t realised how much, nor that he would find himself wishing for those halcyon days when it was just Anna and himself most of the time. Even though the main body of guests were still to arrive the island felt alive, buzzing, and it was impossible now to wander around and not see a living soul. Instead the maids bustled around, keeping the bungalows and public areas pristine, the groundsmen worked full time taming the greenery and ensuring the pools and courts were safe and inviting, and Leo couldn’t sit down without a smiling server offering him a drink and snack. It was all very impressive, but not a patch on the informal friendliness of the island out of season.
Baby Surprise for the Spanish Billionaire Page 12
