by Lori Maguire
New Beginnings
By L. E. Maguire
Copyright © 2013 L. E. Maguire
Cover design © Arijana Karčić, Cover It! Designs
Formatting by Angela McLaurin, Fictional Formats
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction.
Kindle Edition
Copyright © 2013 L. E. Maguire
This e-book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This e-book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Amazon and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Chapter Thirty-Four
Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Six
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Chapter Forty
Chapter Forty-One
Chapter Forty-Two
Epilogue
Bonus Chapter
Acknowledgements
About The Author
To everyone who read and enjoyed Starting Over, thank you! This one is for you! ;)
To my husband, Michael, because he believed that I could.
Standing at a window in Renatta’s apartment, I admired the view of Lake Union as I waited for her to put the finishing touches on her make-up. It was Friday, December second, and the usual blanket of gray clouds covered Seattle. The cold wind was whistling as it blew by the window. I placed my palm to the smooth, cold glass secretly hoping for some snow.
I turned and glanced around the room that was once mine and snorted. I had only slept here a handful of times even though I’ve been living in Seattle for over three months now. Once again, I found myself marveling over how much my life had changed.
I sighed heavily thinking how the last year had been an exhausting whirlwind of ups and downs. I divorced my husband of sixteen years after finding out about his affair with an old high school sweetheart. Renatta encouraged me to move from New Jersey to Washington to help her with her growing photography business. We are both currently and happily employed for a company that supplies photos of houses for sale to real estate companies. Renatta still enjoys doing weddings and portraits on the side. I am more interested in nature photography, and Washington State is full of nothing but beautiful locations to satisfy my needs.
But perhaps the biggest and best change of all is Xavier. A wide smile spread across my face like it always does when I think about that beautiful man, and my mind easily drifted back to our first meeting.
Before I even made it to Washington, I had met my soul mate and didn’t even realize it at the time. He sat next to me on the flight from Newark to Seattle. A pulsating energy was evident between us as soon as we made eye contact on that fateful flight. My skin tingled just thinking about it.
I never was a believer in love at first sight. I never thought such a strong connection could exist between two people. Until him.
Glancing down, I admired my beautiful heart-shaped diamond engagement ring with two round diamonds nestled on either side of the heart. Even without the sun shining, it still sparkled beautifully in the muted light cast from the window.
Xavier knew about, and experienced firsthand, my tendency to be intensely jealous often to the extreme, and yet he still wants to marry me. He accepts me and loves me for who I am. How did I get so lucky?
Then my ex-husband, Stephen, relocated to Seattle. He violently pursued me, which resulted in Xavier becoming overly protective. Not that I could blame him. Once I found out that an ex-boyfriend, who then turned the gun on himself, gunned down a former fiancé of his I understood his strong desire to keep me safe.
But I think the biggest shock came when I found out that Stephen had lied to me about the reason why we were unable to conceive a child. For years he made me believe that the problem was because of me, but that all changed the day I found out I was pregnant with Xavier’s baby. Sadly, it wasn’t meant to be though.
An altercation with Stephen abruptly ended my pregnancy, oddly enough, on the very day that I found out about it. The doctor couldn’t confirm that the altercation was the reason why I miscarried, but Xavier and I blamed Stephen. My hand floated down to my abdomen like it always did when my thoughts turned to the life I had lost.
Looking back on all of it now, it almost seemed like I was remembering events that had happened on a daily soap opera rather than recalling events that had actually occurred in my own life. How could so many life-altering events transpire in such a short time?
I shuddered knowing that Stephen was still out there. He was currently involved with an old friend of Xavier’s, Carline. How could I be certain that he would leave Xavier and me alone? All I wanted was a chance to start over with Xavier. A new beginning. I just wanted to leave Stephen and the hurt that he caused behind me. But the more Stephen kept resurfacing in my current life, and the more hurt he kept inflicting, led me to believe that he had no intention of allowing me to move on.
Glancing at the wall clock, I gasped at the amount of time I had been waiting. “Renatta!” I hollered. “Aren’t you ready yet?”
“Almost!” she hollered back, sounding exasperated. “Don’t worry. The boys can’t start the wedding ceremony without us.”
Wedding. Damn it. Just the mere uttering of the word had me breaking out into a cold sweat.
Before I headed out to the living room, I stopped at the mirror over the dresser in the bedroom to check my hair and make-up. A light sheen of sweat had formed on my brow. I quickly swiped at it, and then ran my damp, sweaty palms down the pale pink, knee-length chiffon dress.
“Don’t forget the flowers,” Renatta reminded me. She stepped out of the bathroom looking gorgeous. Her blond hair was piled high on the top of her head with some loose tendrils falling down and around her face. Her pale blue dress highlighted her big, dark, blue eyes.
“Wow! You look stunning,” I gushed at my best friend.
We hurried out the door. Stewart was waiting with the limo at the curb. He jumped out of the front passenger seat when he saw us coming and quickly opened the door for us.
As the limo approached the Municipal Court building in downtown Seattle, I quickly pulled out my compact mirror from my c
lutch. For the second time since driving from Renatta’s apartment, I checked my appearance in the small compact mirror.
“You’re gorgeous,” Renatta said, rolling her eyes at me.
“And you’re biased,” I replied.
She lifted a perfectly plucked brow at me. “So you keep telling me.” She handed me a bouquet of pale pink roses. “Are you ready?”
I took a deep breath. “As I’ll ever be.”
“Xavier and Tom are already here, Ms. Martin. They’re waiting for you both on the twelfth floor,” Stewart said, as Renatta and I climbed out of the limo.
“Thank you!” I said a little too brightly. I’m just moments away from seeing Xavier. I tried to hide my excitement, but failed miserably. Stewart just smiled at me.
It was customary for the bride and groom to be separated the night before their wedding, so I had stayed at Equinox with Renatta while Tom stayed with Xavier at his condo. I missed Xavier terribly, and neither one of us liked to be away from each other for any length of time. Otherwise, we both found it difficult to concentrate on even the simplest day-to-day activity. Impatiently, I grabbed Renatta’s hand urging her to hurry as we walked up the courthouse steps.
It wasn’t until the elevator began to move up to the twelfth floor that the butterflies started to assault my stomach. I couldn’t stand still in the small confines of the elevator. Just knowing that I would be seeing him in a few short moments had my skin tingling with anticipation.
I looked over at Renatta and was in awe of her composure. She looked so calm and serene as she stood and watched the number indicator rise as the elevator smoothly glided up.
Soon the elevator dinged announcing our arrival on the twelfth floor. The doors smoothly rolled opened. Suddenly, I was frozen on the threshold, remembering why we were here. Renatta frowned and grabbed my arm in an attempt to pull me out of the elevator. Then I heard Xavier’s hearty laugh.
I bolted off the elevator and there he was. My second chance stood there looking heart-stoppingly beautiful in his two-button, black Armani suit with a crisp white shirt and simple black tie. Those brilliant cerulean blue eyes stood out against all the black and white, and right now they were fixated on me in such a way it had me blushing. His cheeks were slightly flushed from laughing, and a huge smile spread across his face as our eyes locked. I couldn’t help but mirror his smile as I walked over to him.
He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed me gently. “I’ve missed you,” he whispered in my ear. I tightened my arms around his neck in response. Closing my eyes, I leaned into his neck. I breathed in Xavier’s familiar woodsy scent and sighed. Home. He smelled like home.
The room in which they conducted marriage ceremonies in the courthouse was huge. There were floor-to-ceiling windows and, being on the twelfth floor, they supplied breathtaking views of Seattle. A courthouse judge was standing in one of the corners with Tom and Renatta. Xavier and I made our way over to them.
Tom was dressed in a simple, black suit. What truly made him look so handsome was the adoring look he was giving Renatta. He looked at her as if there was no one else in the room.
Tom said hello and kissed me on the cheek. I handed Renatta her bouquet of white roses that were accentuated with pale blue carnations that had been dyed to match the color of her dress. Xavier and I dug out the rings. We held them until they were needed during the ceremony.
The judge was a small Asian woman dressed in a black robe holding a black leather portfolio. She cleared her throat to indicate she was ready to begin.
“Today we are here to join Tom and Renatta in marriage and to share in the joy of this occasion, which should be one of the most memorable and happy days of your lives. Now will you please face each other and join hands.” She paused for a moment as Tom and Renatta turned to face each other. Renatta handed me her bouquet so she could hold Tom’s hands.
At that moment, Xavier stepped closer to me and put his hand on the small of my back. I looked up at him and was rewarded with his adorable half smile. He then mouthed the words I love you.
Suddenly, without warning, I was transported back to the day Stephen and I were married. I gasped when Xavier’s face morphed into Stephen’s. I looked away quickly, confused as to why I would think such a thing when I knew in my heart that Xavier was the only one for me. He immediately brought his mouth to my ear and whispered, “Are you all right, sweetness?” Afraid to look at him for fear of seeing Stephen’s face again I just nodded in his direction.
“Please repeat after me,” the judge said, as she started to recite the traditional vow.
Tom’s voice revealed his nervousness by cracking occasionally as he said his vow. The tears that welled up in Renatta’s eyes were her only sign of emotion. There was no hint of nervousness in her voice when it was time for her to recite her vow.
Renatta had two previously failed marriages, but as she stood here before us today, she looked so sure and confident with her decision to marry Tom. Despite the hurt she had been through before, she still gave her heart to Tom fully trusting him with it.
Peeking up at Xavier, I was relieved to see his beautiful face. Deep inside I knew that he loved me as much as I loved him. I glanced down at the flowers in my hands. I love him, but was I ready to marry again? Could I survive the pain if my heart were to get broken again? Did I rush into things with Xavier? Would he be willing to wait a while before we got married? Was I getting cold feet? Was I having second thoughts?
“Ella,” Xavier said, effectively snapping me out of my reverie. He was frowning at me with a look of concern on his face. “It’s time to exchange the rings.”
“Oh, right. I’m sorry,” I said quietly. I shook my head hoping to dispel my sudden erratic thoughts.
Xavier handed the ring he was holding to Tom, and I handed the ring I was holding to Renatta. The rings were simple gold bands with their names and the date engraved on the inside.
After exchanging rings, the judge continued. “Your rings, by their very shape, are symbols of eternal unity without beginning or end. Let them always remind you of the commitments you have made today.” The judge looked at Tom. “You may now kiss the bride.”
Tom and Renatta beamed at each other as they came together for a chaste kiss. The judge congratulated them before moving on to the next excited couple. Xavier and I hugged and kissed our friends giving them our congratulations.
“Is everything all right?” Renatta whispered in my ear when we embraced each other. Before I could answer, she pulled away but didn’t release me. She frowned as she intently searched my eyes.
I did my best to smile widely at her. “Yes, everything is fine. I’m so happy for you.”
When I turned back to Xavier, he wrapped his arms around me. We stood embracing each other for several long seconds. He pressed me closer, holding me tightly to him as if I was in danger of being blown away at any moment. Before he pulled away, he whispered in my ear. “I can’t wait for the day when I get to hear you say I do to me.”
I pulled back to look him in the eyes. Love, passion, and adoration were all I could see in their clear, blue depths. I also saw the same look of confidence and surety on Xavier’s face that Renatta’s face wore during her wedding ceremony. There was no denying his feelings for me. But did he have it in him to have an affair like Stephen did? Was he capable of hurting me like Stephen had? I wanted to believe the look in his eyes, but the pain in my heart left me feeling wary.
“Me too,” I mumbled, smiling weakly at him. He just frowned at me in response.
Xavier turned to Tom and Renatta asking if they were ready to go. Apparently, he had reservations at the Metropolitan Grill for seven o’clock.
As we were riding down the elevator, Xavier’s thumb kept running over my knuckles in a soft caress. I could feel his eyes on me. He knew something wasn’t quite right, but he wasn’t pressing me about it since we were with Tom and Renatta. It was only a matter of time though before he was able to corner me. I had no idea
what I was going to say either. Knowing how much Stephen had hurt me with his betrayal, and given how quickly Xavier and I started our relationship, would he understand my reasoning for wanting to wait?
Stewart was at the curb with the rear passenger door of the limo open and ready to welcome us. He congratulated Tom and Renatta before they climbed in.
Suddenly, Xavier’s hand tightened on mine almost to the point of pain. Alarmed, I looked up at him only to find he was staring at something across the street. His face was ashen and his firm grip was cutting off the blood circulation to my fingers. When I flexed my hand in an attempt to free it, he hustled me into the limo.
I looked out the window across the street to see if I could find what caused him to react the way he did, but I didn’t see anything out of the ordinary. All I saw were regular people setting out on a Friday night following a busy workweek.
As we were driving to the restaurant, I felt my phone vibrate in my clutch. I quickly dug it out thinking it might be my mother or father calling since the only other important people in my life were currently in the limo with me. Surprised to see that it was restricted, I cautiously answered the call. After saying hello several times with no response, the line disconnected.
“Who was it?” Xavier asked, frowning.
“I don’t know. It came up restricted, but there was nothing but dead air.” I shrugged, placing my phone back in my clutch.
