by Naomi Niles
“–to the back of your head. How your thighs twitch as I rub against your clit with my finger.”
“Babe–” she said as if she were out of breath. I could only imagine what she thought as we stood inches apart from each other. Her smile faded into a passionate, longing desire for physical connection. I slid my hand to her putty-like backside, soft and molded with my touch. As I leaned in closer to her, she abruptly took a step back. “Um,” she said as she lowered her script. “Um, maybe we should have picked a different scene.”
It took me a few moments to calm down. The passion between us had already stirred me to the point of wanting more. “Yeah,” I said as I exhaled a gust of disappointed air from my lungs. “Maybe we should have.” I smiled and tossed the script onto the table.
“How about we try this again another day, but, we will pick up on a less, um, we will try a scene with less sexual tension.”
“Yeah, I think that would be best for now.”
She smiled, grabbed her things, and I walked her to the door. “Well, Hannah, it was good to finally go over the script a little bit.”
“Yeah, it was. It definitely was. But, um, we can try again Friday if you’d like? I’ll make sure we have a scene that won’t be as um, racy… if you’d like.”
“Either way is cool with me. Either way.”
We exchanged quiet smiles for a moment, as if we were both hiding things that we were too shy to say. Secrets dripping from the edges of our lips like honey. Something that I would have sucked off of hers in an instant. “Ok,” she said, breaking our silent exchange, “well, I guess I will see you Friday.”
“I will be looking forward to it.”
I watched her walk to her car as the thunder rumbled above us. The thick, dark clouds rolled in and didn’t drop an ounce of rain anywhere near us, but for some reason, I couldn’t stop thinking about whether or not Hannah had still gotten wet in the process.
Chapter Twelve
Hannah
“Do not put that shit in my eggs, Carrie!”
She spun around with a bottle of beer in her hand as she wrinkled her eyebrows together. “What? This adds flavor, Hannah. Stop actin’ like that.”
She started to pour, but I jolted her, “Carrie! No! I do not want beer in my fucking eggs!”
She held the beer steady as she stood near the stove. The eggs crackled in the pan as I waited for what she was going to do next, although I already knew. Suddenly, she tipped the beer bottle over and poured it into the skillet with the eggs. “Oh, shut up, Hannah. You haven’t even tried it like this before. You see, that is your problem. You just say no to things before you give it a shot. This Corona will liven up the taste, I am telling you. Stop being so bougie!”
“I am not eating those eggs.”
“You will if I have to shove it down your pretty little throat!” She took a fork and pushed the eggs around in the skillet as the steam rose into the air above her like a soul being released from its body. “Speaking of shoving it down your throat, how did the thing go with the guy?”
“The thing with the guy?”
She turned off the eye of the stove and made eye contact with me. “The thing. The guy,” she said, snapping her fingers to help her recollect what she was trying to say. “Um, what’s his name? Hezma?”
“Ezra?”
She grabbed two plates from the cabinet. “Yeah, him. Didn’t you go over there the other day to read the script or something?” She sat the plates on the counter and scooped the eggs out, then loaded the rest of the plates with bacon and biscuits. We usually took turns cooking breakfast when we were both home, and right now, it was her turn. She slid the steaming plate of food in front of me, and then put a jar of jelly front and center on the table. Her housecoat was open down the middle, exposing the middle of her bra. She was so comfortable wearing little clothing, and I knew that I was going to have to find that same courage before we began shooting the movie.
“It went well,” I said as I glared at the eggs. “Um, I went to his house, and he showed me around. He has two young boys, and he apparently wants to kill their mother.” Her mouth hung open as she held a forkful of eggs just inches away from her mouth. “No, not literally. I guess I was exaggerating, but he just doesn’t like her. At all.”
She exhaled a sigh of relief, as if somebody’s life had just gotten saved. She shoved the eggs into her mouth and found a way to allow her words to escape the crowded space, “You know, most guys don’t like their children’s mother and vice versa. I’m sure she hates his fucking guts, too.”
“We didn’t get into that, though. He just showed me around,” I picked up a piece of bacon and snapped it in two, “and then we started reading the script.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. Um…”
She lowered her eyes, “Spit it out, Hannah. You’ve already told me that the man is gorgeous. What? Did yall fuck?”
“No!” I said, tapping the table with my hand. “No! I just met him, Carrie. Geez, what do I look like?”
She rolled her eyes, “Oh, please. Grow up. Adults have sex with other people at the drop of a dime. It happens. It’s called being an adult and being able to make your own fucking decisions. If I see a guy and he is hot? And interested in me? Hell, I am going to approach him, I don’t give a damn. You only live once, and I’m not going to pass an opportunity to fuck a hot guy because of what somebody else might think of my actions. They are not in my fucking shoes, and they are not living my life, so I couldn’t care less what they think.”
There it is, I thought to myself. That boldness. That’s what I need. “Well, no, we didn’t have sex.” I slid the crispy piece of bacon into my mouth. The crunch seemed to reverberate throughout our home as if I were eating alone in a dark cave. “I mean, there was tension, though. A lot of sexual tension as we read over the parts.”
Carrie scooped a pile of jelly onto her plate. “Tension because of the script or because you two are hot for each other?”
“Um, if I had to guess, I would say… the latter?”
She swirled her biscuit around in the jelly. “Well,” she said, “there is only one way to find out for sure or not.”
“And what is that?”
She smiled as she chewed her food inside her mouth. She bounced her eyebrows onto her forehead like a basketball, and from there, I knew what she was thinking. “Fuck him,” she said after she swallowed her food. “Fuck him. Or let him fuck you. Either way, just make sure you’re fucked.”
“Really?”
“I am serious. That is the only way that you’ll know if there is real chemistry between you two. Hell,” she said, snapping a piece of bacon in two, “that is how I judge it. Besides, you know this movie has sex scenes in it. Now, I don’t know if you two will actually be having sex or not because there are ways to trick the camera, but if you two are really having sex, then umm… it might be a problem. You haven’t had sex in how long? You know your pussy gets tighter when you go so long without fucking, and that shit might hurt the first few times. Well,” she said with a smirk, “I guess it depends on the size of his dick.” She slid the other half of the bacon around the edge of her lips as her eyes drifted around the room.
I thought about what she said. Everything was happening so fast, and there was a reason I hadn’t had sex in so long. Mainly because I hadn’t found the right guy. I nervously tapped my foot on the ground beneath the table. Well, this can be considered work, I thought to myself. And besides that, he is attractive, and it seems like we have a little more going on between us because of the way we are connecting. I looked down at the eggs as they sat peacefully on my plate, more beige in color than the normal bright yellow I was accustomed to seeing.
“Hannah, just try them. Damn it! You have to stop hiding behind that fucking shell and try new things! You just might like it!”
I thought about Ezra when she said that. Yeah, she is right. I just might like it. With him in mind, I scooped the eggs onto my fork, took a d
eep breath, and slid them into my mouth. I could taste the hint of Corona inside my mouth as I chewed. I smiled and nodded my head as if it wasn’t bad. “See,” Carrie said with a smile. “I told you that you just have to–” Suddenly, I spat the food out of my mouth and gagged from the little bit that I had swallowed. Carrie laughed, “Well,” she said, “Beer is an acquired taste. But at least you tried. At least you tried.”
Chapter Thirteen
Ezra
Friday came as a blur. I had spent all week in anticipation of seeing Hannah again. I was disappointed that things didn’t go a little further the last time she came over, and honestly, it was the first time that I had a woman over here and it we didn’t end up in my bed. Hannah was different, though, and I didn’t want to apply that kind of pressure to her because I didn’t know how she would react. On top of that, we still had to maintain a business relationship, and I didn’t want shit to be awkward between us because I came on too strong. If things were going to go further between us, then it was going to have to be a natural progression. As much as I didn’t want to, I knew that waiting was the name of this game.
I grabbed my phone and dialed her number. “Hello?”
“Hannah. Hey, Ezra here. I was just calling to see if you were still going to come by tonight so we could go over the lines.”
“Oh, yeah. Of course. I have a few errands to run and then I will head that way, around 7-ish?”
“That is fine. I’ll be looking forward to seeing you again. Did you get a chance to read through the script and find a scene a little less racy?”
“Um,” she said with hesitation, “yeah, I looked through it. I was just thinking, though… maybe… it wouldn’t hurt to graze over one of those scenes, you know? Go all the way through with it. I mean, one way or the other, it is going to happen, right? I figured that the best thing to do is just get myself used to it so that it doesn’t all hit me at once, you know?”
I sat quietly on the phone as if I were trying to convince myself that I heard her correctly. Words hid from my mouth like a twisted game of hide and seek as she sat on the other line. “Um, Ezra? Is everything all right? Did I say something wrong? I mean, we can just keep it the way–”
“No,” I said as if I gasped life back into my body. “No. That’s fine. We can do that. I mean, you’re right, it is going to happen eventually. I just didn’t want you to be in an uncomfortable situation, you know?”
“Yeah, I’ve thought about it a lot since the last time we saw each other, and I figured that I should just stop being so um, bougie, and just get my mind ready for what is to come next. So, yeah, I’m good. I will be good. Um, I’m good. Yeah.”
I laughed at her multiple affirmations. “All right. Well, I will see you later tonight.”
“Absolutely.”
I slid the phone onto the couch and leaned back with a smile on my face. I guessed I wasn’t going to have to wait as long as I thought. I remembered what Jeff told me about not falling too fast for Hannah, but shit, you can’t control what your heart wants to do. It wasn’t just a physical thing with Hannah, though. It was the fact that she had become the personification of everything I thought would never exist. A woman with her attitude and sense of humor added to the sex appeal that bubbled from her body like a sauna. The test came when I showed her my boys’ room. I thought she would have felt some kind of way about it and if she did, that would have ended any possibility of us going further with each other.
But she seemed open to the idea. Like the fact that I had two young boys wouldn’t be a hindrance to anything that could develop between us. That right there was the icing on the cake, because if she didn’t have a problem with them, then the sky would be the limit for us. But maybe I was thinking too far into things, or perhaps, just misjudging shit all together. Maybe she just wanted to get her career off the ground, and she was willing to do whatever she could to make sure this movie was a booming success. If that was her angle, I couldn’t be mad at her for it. Hell, now that I think about it, I wanted the same thing, but I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to see what could become of us. Lying through my teeth.
The doorbell rang just after 7 pm. I had just gotten out of the shower 30 minutes before, and there was a cloud of body spray following me throughout the house. A smile was plastered on her face as soon as I opened the door. “So, here we are again,” she said as she stood in front of me. She had on a skirt that stretched to her mid-thighs and a tight shirt that curved to her torso like spandex. Her hair was pulled into a tight ponytail, and her face was smooth, highlighting her best features. Her lips were coated with gloss as my eyes wandered to her breasts. If she didn’t clear her throat, my imagination would have had her undressed within a matter of moments.
“I’m sorry,” I said, floating my line of sight directly into her eyes. “But you look beautiful.”
She smirked, “Oh, please. You don’t have to butter me up. I’m already here.”
She entered into my home as if she owned it, and sashayed over to the couch as I watched her behind jitter with each step. She crossed her leg over the other after she sat down. “So, are you going to stand by the door all night or are we going to get things started?” She had a different attitude this time around. She was straightforward and a little more matter-of-fact with her tone. I gently pushed the door closed.
“All right, boss. I’m on my way.”
She smiled as she removed the script from her purse. “Good.”
She glanced at the script as I sat down on the couch, doing all I could to keep my eyes away from her breasts. The sat perfectly beneath her shirt. Round and inviting with an alluring separation line in the middle of her chest. “So,” I said as I reached for my script, “how has your week been so far?”
“Uneventful,” she said as she paged through the stack of papers. “I haven’t done much since I was chosen to do this movie. Just hanging around the house with my roommate and prepping myself for our movie.”
“Yeah. Have you read the book?”
She laid the script onto her lap. “Yes, I have. Not the whole thing, but I’ve read enough to know what type of movie this will be.”
“Are you cool with it? I mean, have you done anything like this before?”
She sighed. “No, I haven’t. This will be my first time, and honestly, if it wasn’t for my roommate, I wouldn’t have even taken the chance to audition for the role. I always had a thing about um,” she looked away from me, “showing my body, you know? I mean, I didn’t even take showers after gym class in high school because I didn’t want the other girls looking at me. I know that was a long time ago, but some things never change.”
“And you’re comfortable with doing this movie?”
“Well,” she slowly turned back towards me. “I am getting there. I mean, being with you helps.” Her eyes bucked open as she put an embarrassed hand on my leg. “Wait, I didn’t mean it like that. I meant… you know,” she hesitated, “you just have a way of making me feel comfortable. That’s all. I think if I was with anybody else, I might be more apprehensive about what was to come next. But I can honestly say that you are helping me with that. I don’t know if you are doing it intentionally or not, but you are helping.”
I smiled. “Honestly, I don’t see what your issue is as far as your body goes. You are put together flawlessly from my point of view, you know? Most men would kill to have their wives or significant others’ body to resemble yours. I know I would.”
She smiled bashfully and lowered her head towards the script. “Thank you,” she said without looking up. “My roommate says the same thing. I think I am the only one that has to be convinced.”
I watched her page through the stack of papers, searching for something that she couldn’t seem to find. “So, do you have a place in mind that you want to pick up?”
“I figured we could go back to the scene we left off on a few days ago. And… maybe we can just go through until the end of the scene.”
I g
lared at her as she kept her eyes down on the paper. I knew what that entailed, and as my heartbeat sped up in the silence, I admired her beauty. The way one lonely strand of hair had wrestled its way free and laid down the side of her face. The French tip manicure on the edges of her fingernails. The way her eyebrows arched perfectly at the edge. “Yeah,” I said with a smile. “Yeah, we can do that.”
“Ok.” She stood up, “This time, I am going to step out of the room so I can walk back in. That is what the scene calls for.”
I stood up next to her, “Yeah, all right. Do your thing. Just let me know when you are ready.”
My eyes fell on her backside once again as she walked towards the hallway. I smiled to myself, and as she disappeared around the corner, I quickly reached beneath the cushion of the couch to make sure the condoms I left were still in the same place. I was prepared just in case things went in another direction, and it felt like they were about to. “I’m ready,” she yelled from the hallway.
“I’m in here, babe.”
She walked into the front room confidently without the script in her hand. It made me feel like I was slacking on my job because I hadn’t memorized anything yet. She spoke in the middle of my thoughts. “I’ve been calling you for the past few minutes. What were you doing?”
“I’m sorry, I guess I didn’t hear you.”
She rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Look, can you button this dress up?” She lifted her hair and turned her back towards me as I pretended to latch the buttons on her dress. She continued, “You know, I am going, to be honest. I hate going out with your sister and her boyfriend. I mean, your sister is fine, but that guy is just no good for her. At all.” She dropped her hair back to its place, then spun around to me.
“Yeah, I know; I feel the same thing. He is a fuckin’ loser, and I’ve tried to tell her about him, but you know how that goes. It does nothing but push her closer to him.”
