by B. B. Hamel
I turn and my older brother Michael is standing in the doorway to the kitchen, frowning at me.
“Are you just getting home?” he asks me.
I pause, not sure what to do. “No,” I say, shaking my head. “I just went for a walk around the building.”
His frown deepens. “I didn’t hear you leave and I’ve been down here for an hour.”
Shit. What the hell is he doing? I’ve never been close with Michael, not even when we were kids. Maybe it’s because he’s four years older than I am, or maybe it’s because I’ve always preferred Peter.
Or maybe it’s just because Michael is a lot like my father. He shares all those values and doesn’t seem to question anything about our family. Michael is the ideal son, at least according to my father, and that’s bad news for me. I know he believes that if my parents think I should be married off to Milo then I should just do it, because that’s what’s best for me and for the family.
“I guess you weren’t listening,” I say, and turn to head upstairs.
“Wait,” he says, coming toward me. “Hold on.”
“What?” I ask him, heart hammering in my chest.
“Are you wearing makeup?”
I laugh a little bit, nervous and afraid. “I always wear makeup.”
“No, you don’t,” he says, watching me quietly. “Where are you coming from, Sadie?”
He knows. I can see it in his eyes. He put it together already, but he wants me to admit to it. He wants me to come out and say it.
“I was out,” I say softly. “And it’s none of your business.”
He shakes his head. “Father will be angry if you were with that Gavin man.”
“Why do you even care?” I ask him.
“Because I’m worried about you.”
That catches me off guard. I expected him to say something about duty to the family and upholding the family honor, but his response is totally not what I thought. He looks sincere as well.
“Don’t be,” I say to him.
“That man is a lot older than you,” he continues. “And he has a bad reputation. Sadie, I know we haven’t always been close, but I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“I’m okay,” I say to him softly. I can’t believe I’m having this conversation with Michael, of all people. I always thought he only cared about me because he had to, but this seems like genuine concern.
“Just be careful,” he says. “There’s a reason father doesn’t want you with this man.”
“Don’t worry about me,” I say to Michael. “I’m being careful.”
“Okay.” He shakes his head. “Mom and Dad are asleep, so just be quiet.”
I nod to him gratefully and hurry upstairs, not wanting to push my luck.
I partly expected him to start yelling, but that concern was totally unexpected. I feel incredibly fortunate and grateful as I get into my bedroom and shut the door, forgetting about Michael almost as soon as the lock clicks into place.
I should get to bed, but there’s one last thing I want to do. I head into my bathroom and take a picture for Gavin, something sexy, something I’ve never done before. I’m smiling to myself as I hit send, all concern and worry completely gone.
The next morning, I wake up from a single text from Gavin.
“Good morning. I’ve been looking at your picture all night. I need to see you again.”
I smile to myself and respond. “Soon,” I type, and hit send. I toss my phone aside then get up and get ready for the day.
I leave my phone behind when I head downstairs for breakfast. I’m feeling good, totally sure that I didn’t get caught. Mom and Dad were asleep and so they never heard me come in.
But as soon as I walk into the dining room, I know something is wrong. Mother and Peter aren’t there. Michael looks up at me with a frown then glances at father.
“I’ll leave you two alone,” Michael says.
My father nods. “Thank you, son.”
Michael gets up and walks toward the door. When he’s on his way out, he pauses and looks at me. “This is for your own good,” he says softly, and then leaves.
Terror rings through me. I look at father and I know.
Michael freaking told on me.
I can’t believe it. That’s the most childish and awful thing I’ve ever heard in my life. I was starting to think that he was a real older brother and I totally misunderstood him, but clearly I’ve been right all along. He only cares about the family and about doing what father tells him to do.
“Let me explain,” I say, but he stands.
“No, let me explain.” His eyes are cold and angry. “You’re forbidden from leaving this apartment. You’re forbidden from seeing that man ever again. You may not communicate with him. You may not do anything that I don’t approve of. Do you understand?”
I stare back at him and I have to hold back my tears. I’m so freaking angry I could scream. I don’t want to cry because I’m sad, I want to cry because it’s taking so much effort not to scream at him.
I’m not a little girl. I’m not some child that he can push around. I’m an adult, and I need to start acting like one.
I nod my head once. “Whatever you say, father,” I respond, practically spitting the words at him.
“Good.” He sits back down. “You’re dismissed.”
I stand there for a second, staring at him. “One day, you’ll realize that I’m not a child anymore,” I say softly.
“Unfortunately, you are still a child, and you will behave.” Father looks down at his paper. “Go back to your room. I’m finished with you.”
I stare at him, shaking with rage, but I turn and leave. I don’t want to scream at him, because I know it’ll only make things worse.
I don’t know what I’m going to do. Michael is a traitor, an asshole, and a bastard. Father is going to crack down on me harder, probably get some staff members to spy on me or something. I bet he’ll turn off my WiFi or change the password or something like that. And I’m sure Thomas is already taking away my phone.
I’m not letting this stop me. Maybe I can’t do anything about it right now, but I’ll figure it out. I’m smart and a grown ass woman, and I need to get the hell out of this house. If I want to see Gavin, I’m going to see Gavin.
I won’t be used as some political piece by my family, and I won’t be treated like a little child.
I take a deep breath, steady myself, and then begin to plan.
13
Gavin
I don’t hear from Sadie for a week.
At first, I figure it’s just because she’s busy, or maybe because her family is pressuring her to stop seeing me. But her phone goes straight to voicemail and my messages are ignored. I try writing her, and I even send her another present, this time a box with a new computer inside of it, but everything is ignored. There’s no reply. She never comes back on Skype, and she never answers any of my written letters.
I don’t know what the fuck to think.
“Seems pretty obvious to me,” Chuck says. We’re out to lunch exactly one week after I last saw Sadie.
“I’m sure it does,” I grunt at him.
“She got sick of looking at your ugly face.”
I sigh, shaking my head. “Too soon.”
Chuck frowns, sipping his whisky. “Damn. I’ve never seen you like this before.”
“Like how?” I ask.
“Acting like a heartbroken little girl.” He grins at me.
I glare at him. “I’m not fucking heartbroken. I just don’t understand.”
“I don’t know, it seems obvious to me. The girl’s family hates you with a passion. And she’s clearly being controlled by them.”
“Yeah,” I say, shaking my head. “The fucking Tillmans.”
“That’s right. The fucking Tillmans.”
I sip my beer, not in the mood to be out right now, but Chuck insisted. I’ve been moping around too much, or at least according to him I have been.
I�
�m not fucking moping. I don’t mope. I just want to understand why Sadie disappeared after sending me that text in the morning, just a single word. The night before was so damn good, and things felt really perfect, and then she suddenly just disappears on me like a ghost.
“You have to admit,” Chuck says. “There’s a little irony in this.”
“Guess I don’t see it.”
“I mean, you’ve done this to plenty of girls.”
I can’t help but grin a little bit. “No way. I’m more tactful.”
“More tactful?” Chuck laughs, shaking his head. “Remember that Slovenian model you were dating for a little while?”
“Oh yeah,” I say, grinning back at him. “What was her name?”
“Who cares? She was hot as fuck. But when she wanted you to meet her family back in her country, what did you do?”
“Shit,” I say. “It’s not like that.”
“You didn’t call her again. Cut off all contact. You ghosted her ass so fast.”
“She was asking me for money,” I say, but Chuck isn’t having it. In my defense, that is true. She was asking for a loan so she could start her own modeling company. Plus, she was something of a head case. I definitely ghosted her, but for good reason. I was afraid she’d try and stab me.
“You’ve done this to countless women,” Chuck says. “Not just one crazy model.”
“They all know the score,” I say. “They know they get one night and that’s it. I thought it was different with Sadie.”
“Maybe,” he says, a little softer. “Maybe it was supposed to be that way. But look man, she’s not answering you anymore. She’s gone. Let it go.”
I glance down at my drink, not sure what to say.
I can’t accept that. I’m not some heartbroken little puppy dog blubbering into his beer, but I’m not just going to roll over and die either. Chuck thinks I’m moping, but the truth is, I’m trying to figure out my next move.
Clearly, I’m not getting anywhere trying to contact her through traditional methods. I’m betting her family has her on lockdown. My current theory is that she got caught coming home that night, but didn’t know it until the next morning, after she texted me. That’s when she disappeared. Her family hates me so much that maybe they sent her away, out to a convent or some shit like that. The Tillmans have enough money to make their daughter disappear.
Which is actually terrifying. But fortunately, I have enough money to make her reappear, I just have to figure out how.
Chuck thinks that’s a bad idea. He thinks I should just swallow my own medicine and move on. But he never really thought this thing was a good idea to begin with.
He’s afraid of the Tillman family, and for good reason. They practically own this city, or at least have politicians in their pocket. If they wanted to go after my business, they absolutely could. Their businesses are strong and deep, and they have a lot of ties in the community. They could hurt me if they really wanted to.
I just can’t worry about that stuff. I’ve been through so much in my life that I can’t imagine letting some rich assholes push me around. Besides, I know Sadie wants me, it’s her piece of shit family that’s holding everything back.
“I get where you’re coming from,” I say to him eventually. “I really do. Maybe from your perspective, she’s not worth all this.” I pause and then look up at him. “But man, when was the last time you saw me give a shit?”
He looks at me, eyes narrowed. “I don’t know,” he admits finally.
“I haven’t given a shit about much of anything in a while. Business is booming and I have pretty much no problems.” I shake my head slowly. “And yet, I haven’t been happy.”
“I’ve noticed that,” Chuck admits.
“Women, money, it all comes easily to me. But Sadie, she’s different. I don’t know what it is, but I feel something around her.”
“But she’s gone,” Chuck says, still frowning.
“Maybe,” I admit. “But if she’s worth all this, at least to me, shouldn’t I pursue it?”
He sighs and shakes his head. “I don’t know, man. For me, it’s not worth any of this, but what do I know? I’m just a single asshole.”
I grin at him. “You’re definitely an asshole. I’m just saying, I can’t give up so easily.”
“All right. If that’s what you want, obviously I got your back.”
“I appreciate that.”
“Now, let’s talk about something that’s not so fucking boring,” he says, a big grin on his face.
I agree, and we change the subject easily. We have a decent lunch, Chuck grabs the check, and I decide to head back home.
I keep thinking about Sadie as my driver drops me off at my apartment. Once inside, I check my messages and my email, but there’s nothing from her of course.
I need to figure out what to do about this. So far, the only thing I can think of is to hire a private investigator and have him track her down. Maybe that way, he can get a message to her in a way that I can’t.
But I don’t know any PIs, and I’m not sure there are many that will be willing to go up against the Tillman family. I’m sure if there’s a PI out there worth his salt, he’ll know all about the Tillmans and be smart enough to stay away.
Still, I have to try, and so I end up spending the next couple hours making phone calls, trying to track down someone who’s willing to help out.
I almost don’t hear the knock at my door. I’m so consumed with finding a PI that I nearly totally ignore the knock. Only when it comes a second time do I finally snap out of my trance and quickly head to my front door.
I pause for a second before opening it. I don’t know who to expect, but I’m tired and impatient. It’s probably just the doorman with my packages or something.
I don’t expect to see Sadie standing on my doorstep, looking out of breath.
“Hey,” she says.
I stare at her. “Sadie.”
She smiles. “I’m sorry I haven’t called.”
“It’s okay.” I step aside. “Come inside.”
“Okay. Just for a minute.” She steps into my hallway and I shut the door behind her. She looks gorgeous, so goddamn attractive, just like I remembered.
“Where have you been?” I ask her.
She shakes her head. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to disappear. It’s just, I got caught after the last time I saw you.”
Of course. I step toward her and take her hips, pulling her against me. She wraps her arms around my neck and I kiss her deeply, feeling so fucking relieved.
Some part of me did believe that she simply didn’t want anything to do with me anymore. That was something I didn’t really want or maybe couldn’t really handle. But that’s not the case. She didn’t ghost because she just didn’t want me, she ghosted because she had no other choice.
The kiss finally breaks off and I can feel my heart hammering. “What happened?” I ask her.
“My older brother, Michael. He was awake when I got home.”
“Shit,” I say. “Your own brother dimed you out?”
“He didn’t mean it,” she says, brushing me off. “He wanted to do what he thought was best for me.”
I nod slowly. Her family structure is complicated, and I know she doesn’t get along well with her older brother. I decide not to press it.
“I’m glad you’re here,” I say to her.
“I can’t stay long. I’m out on a shopping trip and I ditched my chaperone to come up here.”
I grin at her. “You’re going to get in trouble.”
“Probably.” She shakes her head. “I don’t care. I’m sick of being a prisoner in my own family.”
I grin and kiss her gently on the lips. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too.” She kisses me back, long and slow.
Slowly, we break off the kiss. She looks gorgeous with her flushed cheeks, a little tired, still a little out of breath. I want to take her back into my bedroom and fuck her deep a
nd slow, reward her for coming to see her Daddy even when she knows she shouldn’t.
Instead, I content myself with holding her, however briefly.
“I don’t know how I’m going to contact you again,” she says. “I just want you to know… no, I need you to know, that this wasn’t my choice. I want to see you.”
I nod my head slowly. “I understand.”
“They took away my phone, my laptop.”
“Are you getting mail?” I ask, though I know the answer.
“No.” She pauses. “Did you send something?”
“Letters. And a package.” Her face is horrified. “But nothing inappropriate,” I say quickly.
“Good,” she says, a little relieved.
I grip her hand for a second. “Wait here.” I quickly turn and head back into my bedroom, smiling to myself. I find an old phone that’s tucked away in a drawer. There’s also an old SIM card in there, which I grab and slip into the phone’s slot. When I’m done, I meet her back in the hall.
“Here,” I say, handing it to her.
She takes it with a little smile. “A flip phone?”
I grin. “Better than nothing.”
“Why do you even have this?”
“I don’t know,” I admit. “Just one of those old things I kept around.”
She laughs a little. “Does it work?”
“It will,” I say. “Just find a charger for it. Any little USB charger will work fine, I think. I’ll have the SIM activated as soon as you leave.”
She bites her lip. “Okay,” she says. “This is perfect.”
“Keep it safe. Call and text when you want. I’ll get you a better one as soon as we see each other again.”
“Thank you.” She kisses me softly on the lips. “I have to go now.”
“Okay,” I say. I walk her to the door and open it for her. She lingers in the doorway until I kiss her one last time. She smiles at me then hurries away.
I watch her get into the elevator. She blows me a kiss and laughs as the doors shut on her and she disappears.
