“Need you so fucking much.” he growled, leaning over me.
I lifted my hips as much as I could, inviting him to take what he wanted.
He didn’t disappoint.
The moment that he was pressed against me and slid inside, I felt like everything in my world was right.
He just kept coming, and coming, and coming, until finally his hips met my ass.
“Fuuuuuck,” he groaned.
I couldn’t do a thing.
My body seized, and I wanted him to hold still at the same time I wanted him to unleash the power of his thrusts on my unsuspecting hips.
“Please,” I cried.
I didn’t know what I was asking for.
Honestly, at this point, I wasn’t sure I cared.
As long as he did something.
I felt the pull of the rope, and suddenly the bite of the soft material left my thighs, giving him the ability to pull me up to my knees and get a better angle.
Oh, and let’s not forget the fact that he was able to slide even further inside.
“Oh, sweet baby Jesus,” I whispered. “Oh, God.”
His hands went to my hips, and he pushed them away.
I braced for it, knowing what was coming next, and cried out when he forced himself back inside.
Over and over, more and more, until my pussy couldn’t take it any longer.
I came. So hard that my eyes rolled back into the back of my head, and I was no longer able to hold myself up on my elbows.
My hips stayed where they were by the power in Tate’s hands, but my face met the mattress, and I didn’t even have the strength to turn it so I could draw a full breath of air.
Despite all the other orgasms he’d given me that day, he still accomplished the impossible.
By the time that he started to grunt his release as his body stiffened behind me, my body also followed the same path.
He hit the bed beside me, finally releasing me, but I couldn’t even turn my face to tell him that he’d broken me.
I could do nothing but lie there, sated and so freakin’ confused, that I couldn’t move.
Could do nothing but concentrate on my breathing.
Seconds…minutes…maybe even hours later, I felt the hair at my face slide back, exposing my face and eyes to the harsh bedroom lights.
Once I could see from the surprise, my eyes found Tate’s smug expression.
“What?” I muttered.
He grinned. “Nothing.”
I rolled my eyes, but still didn’t move.
“If you want me to leave, you’re going to have to wait for my legs to start working again.”
His grin kicked up at one side, making my heart skip a beat.
“I don’t want you to leave, pretty girl,” he explained. “I want you to stay right here, warm and limp, and let me continue to enjoy the view.”
I smiled weakly at him.
“I guess I could do that for you.”
But when I can walk, I’m going to get the hell out of here as fast as I can.
Why?
Because something that good—Tate—wouldn’t last. Tate and his amazingness in bed…yeah, that was going nowhere fast. There was no way that I’d keep his interest long enough for me to keep his attention solely on me.
My morose thoughts had me recovering faster than I would have liked, and soon I found myself not only able to move, but also able to sit up.
My thighs burned, and when I looked down, I saw the rope burn there.
My finger went down to trace the lines where the rope had crossed my thigh. Tomorrow, I’d have a raw mark there, but I wasn’t upset about it. If I was being honest, I found it hot as hell.
“You look like you’re thinking some deep thoughts over there.”
I looked up to see Tate still staring at me, uncaring of both his nakedness and mine.
“I’m thinking that I liked this,” I told him honestly.
He laughed.
“Never thought I’d be happy to have some stupid fuckin’ rope.”
My brows rose. “Stupid rope?”
He snorted. “One day I’m going to get you to say another bad word,” he promised. “And watch Boondock Saints.”
“What’s Boondock Saints?” I questioned. “And why did you have rope in here if it wasn’t for…that?”
His chuckle was light as he stood up and started walking to the bathroom.
I watched him as he dropped something into the trash—the condom—and washed his hands, followed by his beard.
Then I blushed profusely thinking about what, exactly, was in that beard.
He came back out moments later and reached for the comforter that’d been on his bed when this had all started, brought it up to the bed, and threw it over my body before climbing under it himself.
I kneeled there under the blanket and stared at the darkness.
“This doesn’t work for me,” I told him, throwing the blanket off.
He started to chuckle, and I got to my feet on the side of the bed while tossing him a glare.
“You mind if I use your shower?” I asked him, pointing to my skin.
Not that I minded having his stuff on me, but it was awkward.
He gestured toward the shower and I took a few shaky steps in the direction before I stopped and turned to him.
“I can do this at my place, too.”
His eyes went lazy.
“If you go back to your place, then I have to follow you there. Right now, I’m pretty content to lay here and wait for you to get into the bed beside me.”
Something that felt a whole lot like hope took life in my belly.
“Okay,” I whispered.
Then I went and showered.
***
“We need to change your locks,” he said.
I looked up at the ceiling instead of staring at the man who was cuddled into my side.
The man felt like a weighted heat blanket at my side, and I wanted nothing more than to cuddle up into him and never move.
“That won’t help,” I murmured, knowing where he was going with the locks. “That’s what I did last time. I called the locksmith in town, and they came out and changed them. My father just called them and got them to give him a key. He’s the pastor, after all. He seriously can’t be shady, at least in everyone else’s eyes.”
He rolled off the bed and got to his feet, reaching down almost casually to pick up the condom—our second of the night—he’d thrown there, and toss it into the trash can, before he put his underwear on. The next thing to follow were his pants.
“I have some new locks that I was going to put on here,” he said. “We’ll go install them.”
I felt my belly tighten.
“That won’t stop him,” I repeated. “He’ll just do the same thing with the locksmith that he did the last time.”
He grunted. “Maybe, but he won’t be able to get in in the middle of the night for now. That’ll give us enough time to set up the alarm.”
“I can’t afford an alarm,” I told him honestly. “Alarms cost monthly, and I don’t have that option right now. I’m having to pay for the alarm at work, as well as insurance, and school loans. It’s just not feasible. I have it in savings, but that needs to be saved in case of an emergency.”
He buttoned his pants and then went down on a knee in the bed, leaning over me where I still lay in his bed.
“Then you’ll stay with me.”
I looked at him with barely concealed anger.
“I’m not doing that,” I told him.
“Then let me worry about the alarm. I know a guy.”
He knew a guy.
Wonderful.
Chapter 15
I regret every single nap I never took.
-Tate’s secret thoughts
Tate
The next morning, I was in a much better mood than when I’d spoken to Rosemary the last tim
e.
I was even halfway excited to be eating at Bord’s again.
It was good that I was going there. I’d been avoiding it, just like I’d been avoiding the rest of my life that I’d left behind—IE my mother.
Before I got out of my truck, though, I pulled out my phone and made a phone call to a man about an alarm.
Once I’d gotten the time and setup scheduled, I shoved the phone back into my pocket and got out of the truck.
My eyes went to the building that held what felt like so many memories—some of those memories being good, but most of them being bad.
I wasn’t saying that all of my time with Ariya was bad, but I couldn’t remember a time when it was truly good, either.
“Are you going to come in, or stay out here all day?”
I looked up to find Rosemary standing in the entrance staring at me. She was holding the glass door open with her hip, and she had her arms crossed tightly over her chest.
She’d changed quite a bit while I was gone…since she’d been that annoying little sister of Ariya’s. Not that she was ever annoying to me as much as she was annoying to Ariya.
It would be a cold day in hell before the two of them ever got along.
“Yeah, I’m coming in,” I said as I started through the parking lot and headed in her direction. “Did you make me breakfast?”
Rosemary had started working with Ariya’s father out of necessity when she was younger, and obviously had never found anything better to do since. Though, she was one hell of a cook, or had been.
Rosemary’s eyes went a little shadowed as she shook her head.
“I was going to, but…” She paused. “I have something to tell you, and I can’t wait too long or Ariya will be here to stock soon, and then she’ll see you here. I have…” she shook her head. “I can’t believe she never told you.”
I was confused. “What was she supposed to tell me?”
She gestured for me to follow her inside the empty bar and grill, and I did, wincing only slightly when I saw the stupid photo next to the door.
It was an old one of Ariya and me when we were younger.
She was beautiful. Then again, she was beautiful now, also.
That likely would never change.
“Take a seat,” Rosemary instructed.
I did as she asked, and then listened as she promptly changed my entire life.
“You have a daughter.”
***
Three hours later
I walked into the first bar that was open; the only thing on my mind was getting a beer, and drinking away my current state of mind.
“You have a daughter. And she’s dying.”
I never, ever thought I’d hear that first statement, let alone the two that followed it.
“Carolyn had a CT scan last week of her abdomen and chest. Dr. Mottle told me this morning that the cancer has filled her liver and her chest is covered with the tumors. Her lower spine has also been affected. The tumors span the length of her spine, and they don’t expect her to walk for much longer. Palliative chemo will stop. They’re going to start hospice soon to make sure she’s kept comfortable.”
Tomorrow, I’d be strong.
Tomorrow, I’d make plans.
Tomorrow, I’d figure out what the hell I was going to do.
Tomorrow, I’d meet the child I didn’t know I had.
Tomorrow, I’d process the fact that she was dying, and there wasn’t a damn thing in the world I could do about it.
Tonight, I’d drink. Tonight, I’d forget. Tonight, I’d ignore everything in this world but the state of my beer mug.
Chapter 16
Unless you’re a pregnancy test, I don’t need you to be negative.
-Hennessy to Krisney
Hennessy
“Did you hear?”
I stared at Krisney in confusion.
“Hear what?”
“Hear that Ariya and Tate have a baby together.”
My entire being, everything that I was, froze in complete, abject horror.
“What?”
It was said so softly that it took me a few minutes to realize that my single word had frozen Krisney in her tracks.
“You didn’t hear?”
No, I hadn’t.
“They have a kid?” I asked, a little more loudly this time.
She nodded her head. “Yeah, apparently Ariya’s sister told him, and then he told everyone at the bar last night that would listen.”
I tried my best to ignore anything and everything that had to do with Ariya, so it came as no surprise that I wouldn’t know that she had a kid. Nor that she had a kid with the man I was currently sleeping with.
Son. Of. A. Bitch.
“How far along is Ariya?” I murmured.
When had he had time to be with her? Was it that time that I saw them out at the taco shop while I was on my date with the vegan that wasn’t really vegan?
Could I forgive him for sleeping with an ex before he was sleeping with me? Then again, we didn’t have an agreement of any kind. What we had was borderline illegal.
Oh, my God.
I’d slept with a man that was sleeping with other women, and I could lose my job!
I had to transfer his care to another psychologist. Right this very minute.
“Hey!” Krisney cried out as I stood up in the middle of our breakfast. “What are you doing?”
“I’m going to be right back,” I lied.
I wasn’t going to be right back. I was going to my office and I was going to call my mentor, and I was going to ask her just what in the hell I was supposed to do next.
“But we haven’t even finished our pancakes yet!” Krisney yelled at my back.
I waved her off and continued to walk, pulling my phone out as I did.
Krisney would pay. She’d also eat the rest of my pancakes, but I didn’t have time for that right now.
The moment I was outside, I came to a sudden, bone jarring halt as I looked in the parking lot next to my car.
But I knew in an instant that Tate, who was standing so close to my car that I could barely breathe, wasn’t there for me.
He was there for the woman that was standing so close to him that they could likely smell each other.
I dropped my head and allowed my hair to spread out over my face, concealing everything but the path in front of me.
I made it to my car and unlocked it with the fob, immediately dropping inside and locking the doors as I started it.
If I rolled my window down right now, I could literally reach out and touch Tate’s ass with my hand.
I growled at myself and clenched my hands into fists, so angry that I could cry.
How could he sleep with her, and then me, all within a two-month period? Seriously, the man had been out of prison for all of two months! He’d been seeing me for one of those months—though we hadn’t been actively fucking all of that time.
But still!
Angry and a whole lot hurt, I speed dialed my mentor’s number as I put the car into reverse.
Looking in my rearview mirror and not at the man that I knew had to have seen me by now, I backed out and dropped the gear shift down into drive.
Just when I was about to leave, I couldn’t help but look to the side, and what I saw made my stomach clench.
Tate was staring at me, as was Ariya.
Tate with pity, and Ariya with not a little bit of hostility.
I instantly felt bile rise in my stomach, and would’ve screamed at the both of them if my mentor hadn’t answered the phone.
“Hennessy, my dear. To what do I owe this pleasure?”
I bit my lip to keep the strangled sob from breaking free of my lips.
“I’m in so much trouble that I don’t even know where to start…”
Thirty minutes later, I was telling my mentor goodbye, no surer of what to do now than when I placed the phone call.<
br />
“I know you don’t want to hear this,” Joan murmured quietly. “But this needs to be taken care of swiftly. His care needs to be handed off to another psychologist, and I would be glad to take it if that’s what you decide. However, this is a line that you need to determine if you only crossed for him, or because you’re letting your emotions get the better of you when you shouldn’t be. I realize his situation isn’t ideal, and that he didn’t do the things he did because he was truly bad, but that doesn’t make him innocent. He needs the care that you can give him, and if you can’t give him that care, then you need to pass him off.”
I knew she was right.
I bit my lip, then blew out a breath while staring at my front door through the windshield of my car.
“I’ll have my assistant send his file over,” I said. “I’ll tell Isidra to also call him and tell him an appointment time. Send that info over to me via email, and I’ll get Isidra on it…if she actually comes in today. She’s been off for two weeks thanks to the flu.”
Joan started to laugh. “Must be going around, because mine has been out almost the same amount of time. I don’t even know how to function without her. I didn’t realize how much work she was doing until I had to do it myself.”
Wasn’t that the truth? Isidra had called a few days ago to say she was on the mend, but still couldn’t stand to be in an upright position for more than an hour. She expected to come back at the beginning of the week, which would mark almost a full three weeks she’d been gone.
Though, I guess I had to admit that I was glad she wasn’t there, because she’d definitely have been suspicious of my and Tate’s relationship. Isidra was a life resident of Hostel, Texas. She’d been there for thirty-seven of her thirty-eight years of life, and likely wouldn’t ever leave.
Though, her husband was also the head football coach for Hostel High School.
She was very intuitive, and she loved to gossip with the best of them, which was why I was wary of doing anything in front of her that would likely get straight back to my father thanks to the Hostel gossip mill.
“I’ll send over the time that works best over a text message. I haven’t tried to touch the emails, and I’d like to avoid doing that. Me and electronics don’t get along all that well.”
Burn in Hail (The Hail Raisers Book 3) Page 14
