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by Janna McMahan


  “We were on a date.”

  “Oh, I see. Did you agree to have sex with this guy?”

  “No. I mean, I don’t know. It’s complicated.”

  Carolyn sat back in her chair and folded her arms over her chest and rocked.

  “Did he force you to have sex with him against your will?”

  Shannon shrugged.

  “Have you ever heard the term date rape?”

  “No.”

  Shannon bowed her head toward her lap where her hands picked the tissue into small wet balls.

  “How old is this guy?”

  “I don’t know. I don’t really know him. He’s in his twenties, I guess.”

  “How old are you?”

  “Sixteen.”

  The nurse sighed. “Did you know that his having sex with you, since he’s over eighteen and you’re under eighteen, is a form of rape? It’s called statutory rape. Sex with a minor is against the law.”

  Shannon focused on Carolyn again and said, “Even if the girl gave in?”

  “Yes.”

  Voices were raised in another room and the nurse said, “Hold on a minute. I’m going to see what’s up.” The voices grew louder and the sound of a scuffle in the waiting room made Carolyn run. Suddenly people were pushing and Shannon grabbed her coat and stood in the hall. A door flew open and on the other side in the waiting room, people were shouting and waving their arms. The smell of burning was pungent and smoke seeped into the hall before the door swished shut again.

  “Shannon!” Liz suddenly grabbed her hand. “The building’s on fire. They said we have to leave.”

  “This way, ladies,” somebody called. They went through an exit into a back parking lot cordoned off with chain link. Women huddled, shivering in blankets and coats. A nurse unlocked a car. “Hurry before y’all freeze,” she said. Shannon sandwiched herself in the back between Liz and a sad-looking middle-aged woman. Three women were in the front. The nurse handed over her keys and said, “Crank it up.”

  All six women sat silently, waiting for a plume of smoke to rise from the building. People were getting into vehicles around them and Shannon realized that the cars belonged to the clinic workers. The woman next to Shannon said, “Does anybody know what happened?”

  A woman from the front seat said, “Apparently one of those idiot people from outside got in and set a trashcan on fire or something. They’ll probably get it under control.”

  Police cars flashed and wailed into the front lot. A fire engine lumbered close behind.

  “What is wrong with these people?” a girl in the front seat said. She had an accent. “In England abortion is not an issue. Why do you bloody Americans have to make such a big deal out of it?”

  Nobody talked then. They watched cops yelling at the protesters in the parking lot to back away from the building. A couple of women were handcuffed and put into squad cars. Firemen hustled in and out of the building.

  “I bet we don’t get to do it today,” the English girl said.

  “Don’t say that,” the woman beside Shannon said. “I have to have this done today. My mother is watching my kids and she’s mad as hell about this anyway.” Her eyes were dull and her voice was so matter-of-fact. “My husband and I have four children. We can’t afford another one. We can’t take care of the kids we have.”

  Carolyn walked out to the parking lot and came to their car. The English girl rolled down the steamy window and Carolyn leaned in. “I’m sorry ladies, but this is beyond our control. The police say this is a crime scene and we have to evacuate.”

  “What does that mean?” the English girl said.

  “Everybody will have to make another appointment.”

  “I can’t! I drove three hours to get here,” the woman beside Shannon said.

  “I’m sorry,” Carolyn said. “We’ll do the best we can to fit you in as soon as possible. Maybe even in a couple of days.”

  “A couple of days?” Shannon said. “But I won’t be here in a couple of days.”

  “I’m sorry,” Carolyn said and moved on to another car.

  “Let’s wait until those people leave,” Liz said. The girl with the baby on her hip jerked away from a police officer and screamed at him. The baby wailed and flailed her arms.

  When they were finally driving out of the parking lot on their way to the mall Liz said, “I don’t ever want to go back there again.”

  “Let’s just wait and call tomorrow morning. See when they can work me in. They said Christmas is going to make it hard to reschedule.” Shannon looked down the light-infested stretch of road, strip malls and restaurants streaking by.

  “There’s always a UK game in town the last week of the year. We could say we’re going to that and come back next week. Lori’s roommates are gone until after New Year’s,” Liz suggested.

  “That sounds like a plan.”

  “I don’t believe in this, but I’ll help you if I can. It’s what Will would have done.”

  “Thanks for not judging me. I really need a friend right now.”

  27

  The morning was crystal, the sun blinding as it flashed through bare branches of trees sheathed in ice. Virginia’s breath was thick vapor. The car’s heater blew hard, but she was still freezing. Virginia drove into the hospital lot as fast as she dared and scooted across the sheet of ice to the emergency entrance. She started when a tree splintered nearby. Limbs cracked off and fell to the ground showering tinkling shards.

  “She’s fine, Mrs. Lemmons,” the emergency room receptionist told her. “I think they took your daughter to X-ray.”

  Virginia hurried down the hall to the place she had taken her son on the occasions when he was sprained or broken by some sport. The X-ray technician was talking with Shannon inside the dark room. Virginia lightly tapped on the doorframe. She caught her breath when she saw the blue-purple patch on her daughter’s temple.

  “Oh, Shannon, baby,” Virginia said.

  “She’s going to be okay,” the technician said. “Just a bump on her head and maybe a broken wrist. We’re going to have a look-see. Can you wait outside for a couple of minutes?” He smiled reassuringly. “I’m going to close the door now.” Virginia slipped into a chair beside the door and strained to hear inside. The man’s voice was audible, but Shannon’s was faint.

  “You’re not pregnant are you?”

  “No.”

  “Okay. I’m just going to put this lead blanket over you to protect your insides anyway.”

  Breathe, Virginia told herself. The dispatcher said Shannon had wrecked on Muldraugh’s Hill—that trees had caught the truck just before it skidded over a ridge. What made Shannon think she could drive that old truck over those slick hills? That girl was crazy to go to the UK game, had made such a big deal out of it. But then Liz had called to say that her parents wouldn’t let her drive because of the ice and it hadn’t occurred to Virginia to tell Shannon not to go by herself. Anybody with any sense should have figured that out without being told.

  The tech wheeled Shannon out and down the hall saying “Come with us,” as he slid by. He took her to room 201, where a nurse helped him lift Shannon onto a hospital bed.

  “Her wrist does have a fracture so she’ll need a cast. She’ll be staying the night for observation,” the tech said. Virginia nodded.

  A fine mist of perspiration edged Shannon’s eyebrows.

  “Are you in pain?” Virginia asked.

  “A little,” Shannon whispered.

  The chirpy nurse went about checking vital signs. “She’s had pain meds, so she’ll get groggy in a minute. They’ll come to take her to get her cast real soon.” The nurse snapped her chart closed. “I’ll leave you two alone.” Her white shoes squeaked softly on the floor.

  “How do you feel, sweetheart?” Virginia smoothed Shannon’s hair.

  “Like I’ve been in a wreck.”

  “Very funny. Do you want me to call your daddy?”

  “Right. What I need right now is you
and Daddy fighting in here.”

  “Never mind. Since you’re so wide awake, why don’t you tell me what you were doing when you knew the road was ice?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it.” She touched her forehead. “Ow, I have a headache.”

  “You’re lucky you didn’t kill yourself.”

  Virginia heard movement behind her and found Roger standing sheepishly, his lanky body half in the room. “Hey,” he said. “Is she okay?”

  Virginia’s stomach tightened. She hadn’t seen him since Will’s funeral.

  “Daddy,” Shannon said through parched lips. Virginia poured her a cup of water, stuck in a straw and brought it to her daughter’s mouth.

  “Hey, baby girl,” he said stepping up to her bedside.

  Shannon smiled and then slowly closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep. Her splinted hand was hugged to her chest. Her breathing was deep and long, a hard, drug-induced sleep.

  “She drifted off,” Roger said.

  “Pain pills,” Virginia said. “She’s going to be out for a while.”

  “How long?” Roger asked.

  “Long enough for a cup of coffee,” a nurse said from behind them. “Why don’t you two go down to the cafeteria. I have to take her to get her cast.”

  “I’ll sit with her.” Kerry Rucker was in the doorway, clad in a flannel work jacket and dirty softball cap. “Is she okay?” Virginia saw that spark that she’d seen so often when this boy looked at Shannon. Like a tree split open with its pulp bared.

  “That would be nice,” Virginia said.

  Virginia and Roger walked the nearly empty hospital corridors to the cafeteria. Steam escaped the paper cups and swirled up between them as they sat opposite each other in a booth.

  “I wonder if there are any babies in the nursery,” Virginia said.

  Roger smiled. “You always were a baby-crazy woman.”

  “They’re just so sweet when they’re little like that. They don’t talk back to you or tell you how stupid you are. They don’t run off and wreck trucks or get killed in rivers. They just let you hold them and love on them as much as you want.”

  “They all grow up eventually.”

  “Not for a long time.”

  “So Shannon wrecked the old truck?”

  “Seems she was headed to the UK game in Lexington and didn’t have enough sense to know that the road was slick. You know, she’s not a very good driver.”

  “Did they tow the truck?”

  “I have no idea.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of it. I’ll figure out if we can get the truck back on the road for her. That is, if you’re ever going to let her drive again.”

  “I don’t know. Maybe I won’t.” Virginia leaned her face into her hands and drew in a giant breath and when she let it out her body shuddered. Her eyes ached with tears, but she fought them back. “I thought she was dead, too. God, Roger, I did. I thought, this is it. Now she’s gone, too, and I’m not a mother anymore. I don’t have anyone in the world.”

  “Nothing’s going to happen to Shannon.” He moved to touch her arm, but she held her hand up to stop him.

  “Don’t,” she said.

  “Look. Nothing’s ever going to happen to Shannon.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “We could all die tomorrow, that’s true. But you can’t live life that way, always wondering what’s going to be the next bad thing.”

  “This wrecks the Junior Miss preliminaries next week. She can’t very well go with a big bruise on her forehead and a cast on her arm.”

  “She’ll be torn up about that.”

  “Guess I’ll have to call that DeSpain woman and let her know.”

  They fell silent again, sipping their coffee. Virginia blew her nose on napkins and dabbed at her eyes.

  “I heard you’re living in a trailer out in Green County,” she said.

  “Out to Stewy Baxter’s place.”

  “That Airstream?”

  “Yeah. It’s cozy.”

  “I bet. How’s the meals out there?”

  “I’m used to better.” He grinned. She ignored it.

  “I see she moved her shop.”

  “Yeah, but I stayed. The front part of the building ain’t been rented out yet and I got a good deal. I figure to stay there awhile. Things are picking up.”

  “That’s good, because I’m going to need help paying this hospital bill.”

  He sighed. “Yep, that’s probably going to be a whopper. I’ll find the money. I’ve got a commission coming in. Big game, bear and elk. That’s at least a couple thousand.”

  Virginia twisted the question she really wanted to ask around in her mind. She couldn’t find a way that seemed casual enough, so she finally just said point blank, “Why’d you two break up?”

  Roger lit a cigarette and gently tapped his first ashes into a gold metal tray on the table. “She’s not the kind of woman a man wants around that long.”

  “What kind of woman is that?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Is that the kind of woman I am, one you don’t want around long?”

  “No. You’re the kind of woman drives a man crazy with want.” He raised his sky-blue eyes to meet hers and she turned away. “Crazy because he wants you to wrap around him every night, but you don’t. Crazy to make you happy, but you never are.”

  She shot him a look then. “I admit that I’m not the most cheerful person in the world, but I stuck it out. I’m not the one that left.”

  “I just got wore out with trying.”

  “You never tried that hard. You were gone all the time—hunting, fishing, trap shoots.”

  “The more I stayed away, the better we got along.”

  “I guess it’s a good thing we’re not together, then.”

  “You don’t miss me at all?” He smiled his sad, crooked grin. He was almost charming when he tried.

  “Don’t look at me like that, Roger Lemmons. If you think that you’re going to come crawling home now that the whore has kicked you out and you’re living all alone in a trailer you can forget it.”

  He took a hard drag. “Believe me. That thought never crossed my mind.”

  Virginia arrived back at the hospital early the next morning, but it took the doctor and nurses most of the day to get around to discharging Shannon. At home, she seemed achy and stiff as she climbed the stairs to her bedroom. Virginia and Patsy took turns checking on her, but there wasn’t much to do. Shannon slept through the day and night and woke up the next morning with another headache and a grouchy attitude. Kerry called half a dozen times over the next few days to see if he could visit, but Virginia put him off, told him she’d let Shannon call when she felt like it.

  Virginia fixed a tray with cheese, crackers, and chicken noodle soup and took it up. An hour later Patsy brought the tray back down with the food barely touched. She lowered herself into a chair and pulled her tatting from a pocket on the front of her housedress. Virginia always marveled that her sister’s thick fingers could make such quick, delicate movements.

  “That girl’s got to eat or she won’t get better,” Patsy said as she worked.

  “She’ll be all right.” Virginia began to wash dishes as she peered through the lacy frost that edged the kitchen window. “She never eats good when she’s sick. Something inside her just turns off to food. She’ll get over it in another day or two.”

  “This is a bad way for her to have to spend New Year’s.”

  “Maybe she’ll learn a lesson from this.”

  “You going to let Kerry come over today? I think that boy’s going to go crazy if you don’t.”

  “If Shannon’s awake he can stay over and they can watch that 1981 ball drop in New York City.”

  “We’re having a sleepover at church. Kids get to sleep in the parsonage. I’m a chaperone.”

  “How’s Brother Philpott? His wife’s been dead, what, a year now?”

  Patsy blushed and b
ent her head closer to her tatting. “He’s fine.”

  Virginia put her hand on her hip. “Patsy, what’s going on with you?”

  Her sister began to wrap tufts of her hair around an index finger. Each curl sprang back to life, smooth and round. “Well, I got to tell you sometime. Brother Philpott and me’ve been sort of courting.”

  “No!”

  Patsy nodded. “Nobody knows.”

  “How long?”

  “Since after Will’s funeral this summer. I went in to talk to Lewis—I call him Lewis now. Anyway I went to talk to him about it. I couldn’t sleep. I was worried about you and Shannon and he was just so sweet. He’s a good man.”

  “Patsy, I can’t believe you! No wonder you’ve been spending so much more time at church.”

  “You should come. It’s a good little church and they’d all welcome you with open arms.”

  “Don’t change the subject. I want to hear about you and Brother Philpott.”

  “Well,” Patsy flushed again. “He finally kissed me the other day. He’s been really proper so far. But he kissed me and said that he wanted us to start real dating so everybody could know.”

  “I’ll be.”

  “I know. Who would of thought I’d ever get another man?”

  “Why do you say that? You’re still young.”

  “I know, but I ain’t felt young in a long time. But now I do. Lewis makes me feel young. He makes me happy.”

  “Do you think you two’ll get married?”

  “Oh, Lord, I hope so. I’d marry him in a heartbeat.”

  The phone jangled.

  “Bet you five dollars that’s Kerry again,” Virginia said.

  “You shouldn’t get in the way of young love.”

  “Humph, you just lost your perspective in that department.”

  The two women laughed.

  Virginia ripped the shiny green wrapping paper and red ribbons from the front door and wadded them into a ball. The Christmas tree looked tired and thirsty. She’d have to drag it out to the fire pit tomorrow. Every year she put the tree up by herself. Every year she took it down by herself. This had been an especially lean year for gifts and decorations both. Every effort had been a burden for Virginia.

  Things weren’t always this way. There was a time when she couldn’t wait for Christmas. Virginia always spent more than she should on the kids. Christmas morning, presents tumbled from the tree, covering a quarter of the room. Roger was always great when it came to Christmas presents. He put together bicycles and sleighs and dollhouses. The holidays brought out the kid in Roger. He’d get down in the floor and play with Shannon and Will. One year, they kept a Matchbox race track up for two months, the cars schlooping and schlooping around the track. Another favorite was the red and blue Rock’em Sock’em robots. They played for hours, always laughing and yelling, “Oh, you knocked my block off!”

 

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