"Excuse me, I'd better check with the boss and find out if he wants me to do anything," I lied.
To be honest, approaching Jordan at this moment was extremely low on my list of things I wanted to do, considering our previous confrontation and his revelation that he knew I was the person in the wretched video. But I needed some excuse to get away from this conversation that was now making me feel icky.
Cari's eyes narrowed and I suspected she'd figured out I was getting bothered. I sent her my trademark hide-everything grin, hoping that would cover for me, and then I crept up to Jordan's side.
He hadn't noticed me, as he was having a discussion with someone next to him. Cari was watching me, so I figured I'd better at least appear as if I were talking to Jordan. I cleared my throat. "Excuse me."
Jordan glanced over his shoulder at me and then turned and continued his conversation. I raised my eyebrows and gritted my teeth. I'd stand here until he acknowledged me, then, damn it all.
He spun suddenly and said, "Weiss, take some pictures of Mia and Kat wearing the equipment. I got video of Adam's demo, but I need still shots. Go up there and ask them to put it on again and model it for you."
"Uh. Okay..."
"You've got your smart phone on you, I presume? You seem to be a big fan of your smart phone..." he said with extra meaning layering his voice. My face and neck heated and I avoided his eyes.
Then he raised his hand and snapped his fingers inches in front of my face. "Quick, get up there before they leave! And email me the photos. Then get back to your filing job."
Did he just snap his fingers at me? I was so mortified--and, to be truthful, terrified--that I couldn't speak, even when I opened my mouth. He'd already turned back to his companion, who happened to be a very beautiful woman--designer suit, Jimmy Choos, expensive highlights and lowlights in her blond hair. She was all decked out. Who was she? I'd never seen her before. Maybe his girlfriend du jour?
I fumed, pulled out my cell phone--the very one that I'd used to tape mystery-man and myself having sex--and walked toward the big screens and the trio standing in front of them, still joking around.
They stopped their conversation, then turned and looked at me when I appeared. "Uh, hi."
"Hey, April," Adam said.
Mia glanced at me and then away, clearly remembering my offensive words about her a few months ago at the party. "Hey," she muttered.
Adam pointed to the red-haired girl. "April, this is Kat. She works in playtesting. April is Jordan's assistant now."
Mia turned back to me, her thin brows raised. "Oh really? You're working for Jordan? God be with you," she said, making a mock sign of the cross as if she were a priest, blessing me.
Kat sputtered a laugh. "Yeah, how'd you screw up to get that position?" I bit my lip. So apparently I hadn't gotten the memo that Jordan had a rep for being a hardass at the office. Kat and Mia seemed to know a lot that I didn't.
Adam gave them both warning looks. "I worked with April's dad at Sony for a little while. She's been in marketing for so long, I figured she could use a change of scenery."
My mouth opened, shocked. I had no idea. And now I realized why I was working in the CFO's office. Not through my own merit. I'd been deluding myself to assume it had been my own hard work that had gotten me here.
I wondered if my dad had something to do with this--maybe asked Adam to move me up. I knew that he felt guilty nowadays. Maybe he didn't feel his generous monthly allowance was enough to absolve him of it.
Dad and I hadn't connected in any meaningful way in a long time. He was lost in his work, and what little time he had left was spent with his new family. It always seemed like I was an afterthought. So instead of attention, he lavished me with money. And now, I guessed, pulling strings.
I glanced quickly over my shoulder, hoping that Cari hadn't heard Adam's comment. But no, she was carefully watching this interaction and appeared to have heard everything. I was uneasy with her knowing any more of my weak spots. She already knew more than enough to sink me.
"Uh, Jordan wanted some photos of you two wearing the equipment, if that's okay?" I held up my cell phone. "I promise to get only your good sides."
Adam turned to them and quietly explained something that I couldn't hear. Both of them nodded and pulled on their goggles before once again stepping onto the platforms. Kat posed like a comic book super heroine, doing arm curls and hulk-like poses. Mia laughed and teased her, dancing in front of her with her dukes up like a boxer while I snapped photos.
"Okay, look up, please, and smile."
They posed, their arms around each other's shoulders. Mia raised her fist and said, "Girl Power!"
"Word," Kat agreed.
Jordan and the blonde approached our group. Adam turned to Jordan's lovely companion and smiled. "Hey, Lindsay, glad you could make it."
"That's some pretty impressive stuff you were just flashing there, Drake. I've got my checkbook out. Where do I sign on to invest?" she laughed. "And you're looking gorgeous today, Mia. How are you doing?"
Adam, Mia and Lindsay continued to chat briefly. They all seemed to know each other so well that I really did wonder if this Lindsay woman was Jordan's girlfriend. She looked older than him by about five to seven years. Maybe the bad boy was settling down. They appeared to make an attractive couple, though that thought irritated me so I didn't dwell on it.
After a few minutes, Adam said something to Mia, kissing her on the cheek, and then he, Jordan and Lindsay moved away to talk to a couple of guys from developing.
I turned back to Mia. She was a very pretty woman, tall and thin with short dark hair and brown eyes. Those eyes suddenly fixed on me as she seemed to realize that I was still there, waiting.
"Hey, Mia," I started nervously, tucking my phone into my pocket. "Could I--um..."
"Hello, Mia..." Cari said, bumping up against me. She threw an arm around my shoulder and I stiffened. "April and I were just talking about you."
Mia's lips thinned. "Funny, I didn't feel my ears burning."
"I think--" I began.
"Yeah, we were saying that you look so good, considering. I mean, you are looking a lot better than you were."
My face burned, and Mia and Kat exchanged a long look.
"Also, I wanted to get a close-up glance of your gorgeous ring. You are so lucky. Can I?" She reached out her hand.
Mia paused and then hesitantly held it out so Cari could get a closer look. "Wow, Mia. Just wow. You sure are living the dream."
I stared at Cari, mouth open, and pulled away from her. Mia was already turned toward Katya, and they began to walk away with their heads close together as they talked. I took a step forward and Cari put a hand on my arm. "Hey, April. We should hang out. Maybe tonight..."
"I have the project from hell to work on--for the boss from hell." I glanced in Jordan's direction. He and the blonde were leaving the warehouse, and Adam was going off in a different direction with the developers.
I grasped at that in order to get rid of Cari. "Oh, look at that, Adam's leaving..."
Cari spun and waved for Ingrid to join her. "Gotta go! See ya." She and Ingrid fell into step behind Adam and his group, as I suspected she would.
I watched her go and my heart sank. I'd let Cari spoil my opportunity to apologize to Mia. And I'd thought up all the things I wanted to say, too. About how I shouldn't have said what I had, how I was so sorry I'd hurt her feelings. I clenched my teeth in frustration and turned, dejectedly making my way back out of the warehouse.
Taking responsibility for my bad behavior toward her would have felt good, even if it was scary. I had no idea if Mia would reject my apology or laugh at it or whatever. But I was angry that I'd allowed Cari to railroad my attempt so easily. I also knew that, deep down, I was too chicken to stand up for myself. I didn't make waves. It had always been like that.
Having to go from one reluctant parent to the other every other week while growing up had taught me that if I wanted to fit in,
I'd have to tell them what they wanted to hear and show them a smile while doing it.
What was worse was that this might have been my only chance to apologize to Mia, since my job future was extremely uncertain. It occurred to me that I owed Jordan an apology, too. Maybe this was one I could find the courage for.
During the entire walk back to his office, I rehearsed what I was going to say to him. By the time I arrived there, I had a beautiful speech all planned in my head. It sounded poetic and perfect, like another of my favorite book heroines, Anne Shirley from Anne of Green Gables.
When she'd practiced her lovely apologies, she'd charmed the old town gossip, Rachel Lynde, who had been prejudiced against the new orphan girl in town. I could do that. My words, like Anne's, would need to be heartfelt. I could definitely do that.
It was only with a slightly shaky hand that I raised my fist and knocked on Jordan's closed office door. He grunted for me to come in.
Anne liked to get down on one knee to profess her apology. I wouldn't go that far, but I made sure to stand front and center before his desk. Luckily, this time he was sitting down--he was much less intimidating that way. I clasped my hands in front of me.
"Well? Did you get the photos?"
"Yes, they're already in your inbox. I just--"
"And the files? What about those?"
"About halfway done. I'll stay late and finish them, but--"
"Then what are you standing here for? Get back to them. It's five, for Chrissakes."
"Um, I wanted to say something first, please. If you'll let me get a word in."
He stood, narrowing his eyes and clenching his teeth. He slowly came around the front of his desk, sat on it and folded powerful arms across his wide chest. So much for not feeling intimidated. I literally gulped.
He raised a brow and then held out his wrist to look at his watch. "You have three minutes. Starting now."
I blinked. Had Rachel Lynde timed Anne during her speech? In a panic, the words came rushing out of my mouth in no particular order at all. "I just wanted to say that I know you don't know me at all, but I've always tried to do the right thing. I've...um...I've had some judgment lapses lately and made some serious mistakes that I deeply regret, but I want to do the right thing and that includes this video situation."
I was rambling, I knew, but I couldn't stop myself. I took a deep breath to continue on. "I never do stuff like that. I'd never done anything like that. I mean, it was amazing sex--no idea it could be that good--but with all this trouble it's caused..." My voice faded out for a moment at the cocky smirk that hovered on his lips. Oh God, I couldn't believe I said that. I sounded so pathetic.
"I--I never set out to hurt anyone or the company. But I was in a pretty dark place at the convention. There was this thing--I don't want to get into it, but my family is kind of screwed up and I let it mess with my head and I did a really stupid thing. And I feel terrible that the company has been dragged into it so--"
"Time!" he said, cutting me off. He hadn't taken his eyes off his watch the entire time I'd been speaking. I swallowed.
"Weiss, you just said absolutely nothing to me. All I heard was 'blah, blah, blah.'" He held up his hand, opened and closed it like a quacking duck. "Get back to work."
I sucked in a painful breath. It had taken a lot to say all that. I'd spent twenty minutes summoning up my courage to get it out.
My cheeks heated. "I resign," I said.
His handsome features did not change in the least. "What?"
"I said that I'm resigning."
"No, you're not."
"Yes. I'm giving you my resignation, and all I ask is that you keep my identity secret as long as possible. So I might be able to find another position to intern somewhere else."
He stood and now towered over me. I was on the shorter side of medium height--okay, five-four. And he was at least six feet tall, probably taller.
"You're not interning somewhere else because you're not resigning."
"I just did."
"No, you said 'blah, blah, blah.'" He opened his hand again. I wanted to slap that damn hand. "Now get out here and finish my goddamn files."
"But--"
"And you are not allowed to talk to anyone about that video. Ignore that it exists."
I opened and closed my mouth several times, positive I looked exactly like a carp. He stepped up to me, standing less than a foot away. Then he bent and got in my face. He could have been saying anything to me, but all I could do was reel from how good he smelled. His scent was warm, like cinnamon, and dry like the white sage that grew in the Southern California coastal hills. My nostrils twitched.
His eyes narrowed. "Knock off the fish face and get the files done."
I closed my mouth, pivoted and walked out of the office. What the what?
He left an hour after our talk, not even saying goodbye, simply nodding in my direction as he walked by. I sat in a daze for several more hours as I finished my pain-in-the-ass task.
So, that was interesting. My Anne Shirley apology didn't work on him...or did it? Maybe he would have fired me otherwise? I wasn't quite sure. All I knew was that I'd divulged way too much information--information that it bugged me he now knew.
Maybe my apology had been so pathetic that he'd taken pity on me and decided against firing me for that very reason. Well, whatever it was, I still had my job though I'd likely never find out why.
Chapter 4
Jordan
Goddamn, this woman was murder on my blood pressure. I'd felt like strangling her during that speech of hers--okay, except when she was talking about how good the sex was. So the not-so-poor little good girl had gone slumming and done a naughty thing. I knew her type. A woman who needed to tie one on and sow her wild oats, then cry and wring her hands afterward when she realized the consequences of her actions had hurt other people.
I knew that type all too damn well, as a matter of fact. I gripped the steering wheel on my drive home, tense with anger. It didn't help that she was so goddamn beautiful--that hot body, that angel face, those blue eyes. I told my brain to stop noticing it, but my body hadn't gotten the memo yet. Every time she walked in the room, instantaneous reactions would hit me between the eyes--that fine ass, those hot tits, that shiny hair. And I'd remember how one quick hookup had only given me a taste of what I could no longer have. Instead of getting her out of my system, which had been the original plan, I now wanted her more than I did before.
I rubbed my forehead forcefully, trying to shove her out of my thoughts.
And goddamn but if I didn't have a shit-ton of work to get done tonight. I would have liked to blow off a little steam, but I couldn't afford the time or energy.
Something had to give. This lifestyle had to give. The empty hookups. The drunken parties. The rock star way of life. Was it worth it? Was it even doing anything for me anymore? It all felt so hollow and unfulfilling. Or maybe I was just getting too old.
It was dark when I got home, but I grabbed a bottle of beer and went out onto the back patio of my house, which opened directly onto the sand of the primest stretch of famed Newport Beach surfing real estate in Orange County.
I always liked to end my day to the sound of the sea. Though I had hours of work yet, I needed this now. This evening was busy with people strolling by on the paved bicycle and walking paths that paralleled the shoreline. I was hidden to them, tucked away in my covered patio. Their conversation grew and faded, but the ever-present rhythm of the ocean was what calmed me.
My phone chimed and I checked it.
Hey lover. Haven't heard from u in a while.
It was Lyla, the cover model I'd recently "dated." Her text was accompanied by a nice shot of her very lovely rack. I smiled, licked my lips and actually considered it for a few minutes. A good roll in the hay with her might be a welcome diversion from thoughts of the unattainable and unbelievably frustrating intern.
Lyla was the type who wouldn't mind getting down to business and then letting
me get back to mine. I had to admit that I was sorely tempted. But before I could allow myself any more of those thoughts, I keyed in my reply.
Sorry, beautiful. Have a shitload of work to do. Maybe another night?
Her reply came less than a minute later.
But I'm horny tonight. :(
Well, shit. So was I. But my careless actions this past weekend really had me thinking. I'd fucked up. Literally. And somehow that had ended up all over the Internet.
Because of that, I'd had to lie to my best friend--the best friend who had gone through some major crises in the past year. Now my stupid move had added to his already heavy load. With a deep breath, I suppressed the guilt that had me second-guessing myself and my persistent goal to get the company on the market.
I miss my fav set of rock hard abs.
I humored her, pulling up my shirt and snapping a pic for her then hitting send with the message:
This will have to do for now. Sorry babe.
Her reply made me grin and almost had me hitting the call button to get her over here.
I just licked the screen. Don't judge.
Before I could even control it, the image of that intern licking me flashed into my mind--her dark head moving across my chest. It had been hot sex, but I'd kept my clothes on the entire time. I really could have stood for her to lick my chest. And my--
What the hell was I thinking? Had I learned nothing from the past twenty-four hours?
I was starting to doubt myself--to the extent that I was considering the unthinkable. To punish myself for my stupidity, I was going to abstain from random hookups--and for getting drunk, for that matter. Hell, if the CFO thing fell through, maybe I'd join a monk order or something.
With a sigh, I went inside and pulled out my laptop to bury myself in the paperwork I'd brought home with me. I had to go over the legal documents that had been filed by our investment bankers to see what loopholes they might try to exploit. I also had to call my Internet security guy and find out what he could do about this viral video, if anything.
Once something went viral, though, it was like pissing into the wind to try and stop it. There were recourses we could take, like the takedown notices. But the risk of exposure made those recourses of questionable value.
For the Win Page 5
