“I never knew.”
“Of course not. You would’ve ratted me out to Mom and Charlie. You were so damn good. I couldn't risk my fun being ruined. At the time, it was mostly fun. There were some scary moments. I’ve been raped more times than I care to admit, Carter. I’ve done things to get pills…I’m not proud of who I used to be. Hollywood was horrible for drugs. I dabbled in cocaine, took ecstasy whenever I needed a high, and lived on top of the world. It’s all fine and good until your body rebels. Last year I was partying and I ended up in the hospital. My manager insisted I go to rehab then, but I told him no. There was a party after the Grammys, when I won, and I had a reaction to the ecstasy I took at the after party. I guess I got a bad batch or something. It wasn’t good, at all. Since then I have been exhausted all the time.” Sipping my coffee, I waited for him to respond.
“Were the drugs part of your mood swings? You acted like you were crazy sometimes and it was driving me insane.”
“Probably. Mostly I was just into myself and being a bitch to keep you on your toes and wanting me. Not really some of my finest moments...”
“Were you high when the accident happened?”
That hurt like an axe chopping off a limb. “No. I was only using on the weekends, mostly. The night of the accident, after Charlie called and told me about Mom…” I choked up and cleared my throat. “I went to Dad’s house and I told him what I’d been doing. I begged him to let me go to Seattle to live with my aunt. He was mortified and put me on a plane at dawn. The accident scared me straight for a little while. Then I met up with some guys in the music scene and my aunt helped me get a demo tape into a couple labels where she had connections. I was fine until I got big. Then drugs were everywhere and I felt such pressure to perform...they made it fun to perform. I wasn’t doing what I wanted music-wise and I really hated it without the drugs.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Me too. It’s easy to get caught up in peer pressure and believe that people want the best for you. When really they just want to line their own pockets.”
We fell silent for a moment and he piped up, “I meant to say thank you for putting Logan in contact with us.”
“Of course. It’s the least I could do. Logan’s a good guy. He came to see me a few times in rehab. We naturally talked about you and I mentioned you were running the shop…it was nothing.”
“Tell me more about when you were gone,” he asked, genuinely curious. I couldn’t tell him more. Maybe one day.
“Not today. Some things are a little hard to talk about. I’m here now and I don’t want to live in the past anymore. I’m not that Brielle. I haven’t been for a long time.”
Dad walked in the door just then and I breathed a sigh of relief. “Bri, I found kale. I think.”
Giggling, I told him, “I bet you did just fine.” Pulling the kale from the bag, I sighed in relief and turned to Carter. “See?”
“Kale.” He smiled.
“I’m going to make kale chips. Want some?”
“Sure.”
“Awesome, Charlie, you found avocados too.”
Mindlessly, I chopped kale and made my chips. The men chatted behind me and I tried to pretend I felt normal. Exhaustion nipped at me and I considered sleep again, but I wanted to eat first. A little while later, my chips were done and I ate them with smashed avocado and salt. Neither Charlie nor Carter were impressed. “It’s good!” I told them.
“You enjoy it. I want a burger.” Carter groused.
“Oh, come on, you guys need to eat more than meat, cheese, and potatoes. Let me cook for you tomorrow night. I’ll make a vegetarian feast.”
“Do you think you feel up for all that, Bri?” Charlie asked. “You know the doctor said to take it easy and after your dad came and got you upset...”
“Your dad came by? Why did he upset you?”
Sighing heavily, I shrugged. “Yes, he did. He wanted money. I told him no. He got angry and threatened me. He said that he made me who I am and without him sending me to Washington I would've never been famous. He’s broke from gambling too much, and I'm not going to fuel his bad habit. That would be like giving crack to a crackhead. Anyway. Back to cooking. I like to cook. Let me cook for you. But right now? I think I’m ready to go to bed. Carter, can you help me upstairs?” Pushing away my plate, I murmured, “Charlie can you put that away? I’m really tired.”
“I’ve got it honey, you go rest.”
“Thanks.” Standing, I wavered on my feet and almost fell over, but Carter’s strong arms caught me. “Good catch, Carter,” I whispered against his neck.
He scooped me into his arms and I cradled against his chest. It was the best feeling in the world. I’d never felt safer or more secure. Nudging my door open with his foot, he walked across my room and placed me in bed before tucking me in and kissing my forehead.
Catching my hand behind his neck, I pulled his lips to mine. Fireworks erupted in my bloodstream and I tried to pull him closer. I needed him.
Pulling away, he whispered, “Sleep.”
“I’ll be better soon. I shouldn’t have let my manager convince me to go. Are you mad?”
Sitting on the edge of my bed, he shrugged. “I was.”
“I’m sorry. I was emotional after we had sex and then he called and said I could do a short tour, just six shows, and then be off for the month of January. So I jumped on it. I figured I’d be back and we would’ve both had time to think…I just didn’t realize that I was also expected to fit into this stupid dress for the Grammys. It was some designer from Thailand and she made the dress so small a little girl couldn’t wear it.” I rambled on, hoping he would understand what was going through my head. I wasn’t running away, just taking a breath because it was all so much.
Touching his finger to my lips, he sighed. “Don’t explain all this to me. You’re here. You’re off the road, and it’s over, right?”
“Right. I want to just record albums. Nothing else.”
“All you need to worry about is getting rest and feeling better. I’m going to go. Get some rest, okay? Christmas is coming soon and you need to be up and around for Dad’s terrible caroling.”
Smiling tiredly, I nodded. “You got it. I won’t always have bad days…just sometimes.” He stood from the bed and walked to the door. “I love you,” I called, my eyes already closing. I needed him to know how much I cared.
“I love you, too.”
Chapter Sixteen
Charlie really went all out for Christmas. I guessed it meant a lot to him having me home. I doubted seriously he’d taken the ornaments down from the attic since Mom had died. The old plastic tree was coated in dust as were the ornaments. I’d offered to help, but Charlie had refused.
“You rest. I’ll just get these up.”
I considered going out shopping for presents, but frankly, I was enjoying the anonymity of being hidden away in the house. I didn’t want anyone fawning over me or whispering. Not yet, anyway. I’d have to take the guys somewhere special as a late Christmas present or something. Maybe Cancun? Christmas morning I woke early and dragged myself downstairs to make coffee.
I missed my mom, desperately. It felt so weird to be back in the house for Christmas without her. Tears pricked at my lashes and I sniffled over my cup. The door opened and I glanced out the window to see Carter’s car. What’s he doing here so early?
“Carter?”
He peeked around the door and smiled. “Hey, what are you doing up?”
“I’m tired, but I can’t sleep. So I’m drinking coffee.”
“Oh, caffeine is definitely going to help you sleep,” he quipped.
“It’s decaf. Bite me.”
“Where?” He wiggled his brows and I grinned. How I love you….
“Maybe another day.”
“Chicken. How are you feeling?”
“Okay. Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas. I got you something.”
Pursing my lips, I sighed. “You d
idn’t have to do that. I didn’t get you anything.”
“You being here is enough.”
“Well, where is it?” I demanded, placing my mug on the table and holding out my hand.
“Come get it. It’s in my pocket.”
“Wait. Is this one of those I-stick-my-hand-in-your-pocket-and-find-your-dick jokes?” Not that I would’ve minded, of course, but I had to give him a little bit of a hard time. I was thrilled. He’d gotten me a present.
“No, it’s not, but that’s a good one to file away. Thanks for the idea. It’s in my coat. ”
Standing carefully from the chair, I walked to him and slipped my hand in his pocket. Withdrawing a blue box, my pulse accelerated. Holy shit, did he get me a ring? Is he about to propose? “I can’t…”
“Just open it, okay?” he pleaded.
Pulling off the lid, I stared down at a silver charm bracelet and my heart thudded. He’d gotten me a bracelet. Just like the one I’d wanted all those years ago. “You got me a charm bracelet.”
“I did.” He smiled widely.
“I hated that you got that window licker one. I was so jealous. Now you got me one.”
“See, what’s even more special? This one’s real silver. And the charms I picked just for you.”
“Hold the box,” I ordered, and he chuckled as I looked over the bracelet. “A wrench and a heart?”
“You said you needed a mechanic to fix your heart. Last I checked, I’m qualified to do the job.”
Carter...Oh, Carter…“You deserve better than me.” I placed the bracelet back into the box and closed the lid. I still wanted to give him the chance to go. It would only hurt a little bit. I wasn’t exactly whole and healthy anymore. I was damaged. Who wanted damaged merchandise?
He tossed the box on the table and cupped my face in his hands. The emotion in his eyes made me breathless and as he touched his lips to mine, I froze. Fire flickered through my belly again and I was consumed by him. Like a dry piece of wood, I sizzled in his embrace. Kissing back, I pressed my body to his. I didn’t care if he wrecked me. I couldn’t resist him, not any longer.
“I saw Carter kissing Brielle,” Charlie sang off-key as he walked into the kitchen and I jerked out of Carter’s embrace, my cheeks hot.
“It’s not what you think.”
“Oh, please. I’ve known since you left the first time. I really knew you two wanted each other before that. I don’t have a problem with it. Lisa wouldn’t have cared either. As long as the two of you are happy…now, where’s the coffee? Carter, take your coat off and have some breakfast. It’s Christmas morning, both of my kids are here, and I’m bound and determined to celebrate.”
“Put it on,” Carter insisted, pointing at the box.
Charlie had known? “I-I…”
Dad turned to us and sighed. “Bri, accept that this boy loves you. You’re worth being loved. Carter, accept that this kid’s a runner. She doesn’t know how to stay when things get bad. The rest of your lives you’re going to be working on that. Put whatever it is he got you on, unless it’s lingerie, I do not need to see that. Then please, make me happy and let’s enjoy the day.”
He held out the box to me and I took it with a sigh. “It’s beautiful.” It was. It was perfect.
“Let me help you put it on,” he offered, taking the bracelet and slipping it around my wrist.
“It’s perfect. I’m sorry I didn’t get you anything.”
“I don’t need anything.”
“He does,” Charlie broke in. “He needs a woman to warm his bed.”
“Dad!” Carter yelled, his cheeks pinking in embarrassment.
“What?” he shrugged. “It’s true.”
“Move so I can make bacon.” Carter grumbled.
“No way in hell. You burned it last time,” Charlie argued.
“You both move. I’ll make bacon. But I’m not eating it. I’ll eat oatmeal.” I loved them but they were on my nerves, it was too early for shenanigans. “I need a skillet.”
“Here you go,” Charlie handed me one then sat at the table. “Where’s my present?” He asked Carter.
“Who said you got one?”
“You didn’t get your old man a gift? Well that’s just shitty.”
“I did. It’s out in the car, though.”
“Go get it. I’m waiting.”
While Carter disappeared outside, I flipped the bacon. “I wonder what it is?”
“Hmmm….” Charlie muttered.
“Here.” Carter tossed a shirt box on the table.
“It better not be underwear,” Charlie warned.
“It’s not.”
Turning, I watched Charlie open the box. “What’s this?” he asked.
Carter toed the floor and looked down at his shoe. “I was thinking…since you’ve gotten so much better, it’s time you came back to the shop. Your shirt says Father. Mine says Son. I want to change the shop name to Father and Son Auto. It’s always been yours. I just held it until you were ready to take back the reins.”
I gasped. Carter! That’s perfect!
Charlie touched the embroidered patch on the shirt and sniffled slightly. “I don’t know what to say.”
Pointing at them with the spatula, I gave them a dose of their own medicine. “Charlie, accept that the shop is where you belong. I’m so tired of talking with you about cars. Take Carter’s offer. Carter, understand that your dad is still struggling and you can’t put too much pressure on him.”
“Hey, I’m the one with the five cent psychiatrist stand,” Charlie objected.
I rolled my eyes. “Whatever.”
“So, what do you say, Dad?” Carter pressed.
“I-I…I’d love to.” He jumped up from the table and pulled Carter into a hug. “God dammit, you’re such a good kid.”
“He’s the best,” I agreed. “He always has been. We just didn’t always appreciate it. I know I didn’t.”
“Can I start Monday?” Charlie asked.
“Absolutely.”
“My manager dropped me. So did my label,” I blurted as I turned over a strip of bacon. They’d dropped me the night before. Patrick called me in a fury, blaming me for everything. I hadn’t meant to say anything but it just came out before I could stop it like word vomit. Good job, genius, ruin Christmas morning…
“What?” they cried in unison.
“I told them I didn’t want to tour anymore. I just want to make music. They told me no.”
“So what are you going to do now?” Carter asked.
A small smile played at my lips. “I don’t know. Maybe hang around Marysville, Nebraska for a while.”
Smoke billowed out of the pan and the smoke detector went off. “God dammit, Bri! You burned the bacon!” Charlie yelled, grabbing the skillet and throwing it out the back door into a snow pile.
We ran upstairs. Carter pulled me along behind him until we ended up in his old room. I giggled as I ran into him. “Ow.”
“You mean it. You’re staying?” he asked hopefully.
“I am. I might look into a smaller label that will let me write what I want to and only do albums, no touring. But for now, I’m disillusioned with Hollywood. It’s not as glamorous as it seems. I just want to heal my body and be at peace with myself. I’m getting there. I don’t want to play any more games. I don’t want to sneak and lie. I just want to be right here. With you.” Leaning into him, I smiled softly.
“I don’t want to hold you in one place, though. You’re too wild to be tamed. You’re too bad to be wholly good.”
I loved him, too much for my own good. “I’ll be bad when it’s necessary. But I don’t want to be your evil stepsister anymore. I just want to be Brielle. A girl you’re in love with. I don’t want you to be Carter, my good stepbrother, either. I just want you to be Carter, a guy I’m in love with.”
“I can live with that.”
“It’s a good thing, because I think you’re stuck with me. You gave me a charm bracelet and you said you
’d be my mechanic. You know I’m rough on brakes.”
He pulled me into his arms and kissed my forehead. “I’ll always change your brakes for you. Always.”
“Good. Keep me safe. That’s what you were best at.” It’s what he’s always been the best at.
***
Weeks passed and Carter and I didn’t set beds on fire, although there were times I thought we might. We were explosive. I had a secret, and I couldn’t wait to tell him. No, I was not pregnant. I had a present for him. He loved cars…well, I had the best car for him anyone could get.
“Hey, I have a question for you.”
“Shoot.”
“Do you know how to work on Porsches?”
He shrugged. “I guess so. A car’s a car, pretty much. Honestly, I’m a lot more interested in learning how to work on you…” Sliding down the bed, he buried his face between my legs. He’d been a quick learner and I was constantly having orgasms thanks to him. Not that I was complaining but he was exhausting!
“Be-be-be serious!” I stuttered, my thighs quaking as he flicked his tongue against my clit.
“I am,” he murmured against my skin. “I’m real serious about you, Brielle Harper.” Sucking on my clit firmly, he slipped one finger deep inside me and I was close to coming. For the fifth time in the last hour.
“Carter, you can’t make me come again. I-I-I can resist your charms, you know!” I was a liar. A terrible, horrible liar. I was right on the edge and he knew it.
Raising his head, he smiled slowly. “Is that so?”
“It’s so. I taught you all you know and I am the sex master.”
A second finger plunged into me and I hissed softly. He smiled wider. “What was that?”
“I can resist…um…” I hummed softly as he lowered his mouth back to my clit. I came undone when he licked figure eights on my clit and flickered up against my g-spot. My thighs spasmed and I screamed his name. “Carter!”
He grinned against my thigh. “So, what was that about being able to resist me?”
“I hate you! You’re exhausting!”
“You created this monster.” He climbed up to lay beside me and kissed my nose. “It’s your fault.”
Good Stepbrother (Love #2) Page 16
