by Jody Holford
Dressed in a long-sleeved T-shirt and shorts, Garrett reminded Megan that her chill was only in her head. He unloaded two pints of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and a Styrofoam take-out container of what she knew were the most delicious doughnuts in Brockton Point. Sugar Sweet, owned by Evie McLaughlin, was the Adam’s kiss of desserts.
“Start with doughnuts?” Garrett popped one in his mouth.
“Don’t be silly,” Megan answered, grabbing a couple of bowls from the cupboard. “We’ll start with both.”
Putting a few sugary rounds of dough into the bowl, Garrett scooped out some ice cream for each of them.
“Presentation sucks. Sorry.”
She scooped up a bite with both and sighed. “You’re forgiven.”
He laughed and put the ice cream in her freezer and shut the lid on the treats. Megan walked to the couch—Parker and Garrett had given her their old one when she’d moved in.
Sinking into the cushions, her balance returned. She’d made too much of it. It had been so long since she’d been on a date or been kissed that she’d blown Adam’s out of proportion. It had just seemed amazing. He was an account manager. It couldn’t have been that good.
Garrett sat beside her and put his large feet up on her coffee table. “Spill, sweet pea.”
Taking another large bite, she leaned her head on his shoulder while she chewed and thought of what to say. When she swallowed, she told him everything, ending with the kiss. Garrett scraped the sides of his bowl and finished off his dessert. Setting the bowl on the table beside where she’d put hers, he put an arm around her shoulder and tucked her into his side.
“He’s scared. You made him feel. You need to do that again.”
Her head snapped up, nearly connecting with his chin. That was so not the advice Parker or even Stella would have given. Megan swallowed, her throat unaccountably dry. “What? No. I do not need to do that again. Ever.”
He smiled down at her indulgently. “So you’re just going to keep helping him find the perfect, non-feeling wife who will also love his child unconditionally, the way you already do?”
Refusing to look at him when she answered, she stared at the photographs on the far wall of her apartment. That was exactly what she was going to do. Charlie didn’t need a roller coaster ride thrown into his path. He needed the stability Adam was looking for—the only kind of relationship he’d let himself have.
“Yes. That’s exactly what I’m going to do. And don’t forget hygiene. She’ll be non-feeling and smell great.”
Garrett’s laugh warmed her in the way her cozy sweater couldn’t. “You smell perfect.”
Tears stung. If his list had only included loving his son, she might have fought harder. But the very fact that he had a list proved how different their needs were.
“No. He doesn’t believe in love, Gar. He gave his heart away, and Reece demolished it. He’s a workaholic. He’s short-tempered with everyone but Charlie, doesn’t like to socialize, hates romance, and travels more all the time.”
Sighing, her brother’s boyfriend pulled his arm from around her shoulder and leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees. Turning his head to look at her, he gave her a tight smile.
“All those negatives and yet you still want to kiss him again.”
Her mouth dropped open, and her own temper shortened considerably—snapping to attention. But she couldn’t deny it. “Of course I want to kiss him again, but that’s just because I’ve had an exceptionally long dry spell. It’s less about him and more about the fact I want to get—”
Garrett covered his ears. “Don’t say stuff like that to honorary brothers.”
She swatted him. “Knock it off. Being able to say that to you is why you’re here and Parks isn’t.”
Getting up, Garrett stretched then picked up their bowls and took them to the sink. Megan sunk back into her couch.
“Your brother said no to me the first six times I asked him out.”
Surprise had her looking up. Garrett stood in her tiny kitchen, arms crossed over his chest, smiling toward the same photographs she’d been looking at earlier. Megan waited.
“We started working together, and the first time it was that, the work thing. Couldn’t date a co-worker. Then it was because I’d just come out of a relationship.”
Garrett looked over at her, but she stayed quiet. Parker didn’t give details like this. Walking to the wall, he stared at a picture she’d taken of him, Parker, and Charlie at the Fourth of July town picnic the year before. Adam had been working. As usual.
“We started becoming friends, so then it was that. Didn’t want to wreck a friendship.”
“You remember every reason?”
He looked at her over his shoulder. “Of course. You always remember the roadblocks that tried to stop you from getting what you know you have to have. I had to have your brother, so every new roadblock was my chance to either stop or push past. Fourth no was because he’d started dating someone. Man, I was pissed over that one. Didn’t talk to him for a week. We worked every night together, and I couldn’t even look at him.”
“I didn’t know that.” Parker was an idiot if he almost let Garrett walk out of his life. She couldn’t imagine being given a real chance at forever and turning it down. Not if the person truly loved her the way she knew Parks and Garrett loved each other.
He came back to the couch and sat beside her. “Fifth no was finally the truth. He was scared. I wasn’t a one-night deal. He said he knew that the minute he met me. And he didn’t know if he’d ever be ready for a serious commitment.”
Megan sidled up to him and squeezed his arm. “I had no idea he was so stubborn. I’ve told you before, you should have picked me.”
Garrett kissed her forehead. “If only life was that easy.”
“Sixth time, he said no, and I said fine. I was done. He showed up at my place that night. Said he was done, too. Done fighting it. That was six years ago. It beat me down every time he said no. But one of us had to believe enough for the both of us.”
Megan nodded. She got it. She understood. It just didn’t apply here. Megan had waited years to fulfill her dream of being a teacher. She could do the same with her dreams of being someone’s wife and mother.
“I’m so glad it worked out for you guys, Gar. You know I am. But this is different. For one thing, there’s a kid involved. A kid I already love. I can’t stand the thought of him getting caught in the middle of anything. But also, you and Parker wanted each other. You were both fighting the inevitable. Adam doesn’t want me.”
Garrett scoffed, and heat warmed Megan’s cheeks.
“Okay, he might want me. But I’m everything he doesn’t want. For real. He’s not emotional like we are. He’s very…analytical.” Megan lifted one hand, palm up. “On this side of the scale, there’s chemistry and heat. Maybe even a possibility for genuine friendship and laughter. But no guarantees.”
She stopped and looked at Garrett, lifting the other hand, palm up. “On the other side, there’s no risk, no fuss, and all reward. Someone for Charlie, someone for him. A mutual agreement of contentment.”
“That’s bullshit. No one wants that.”
She dropped both of her hands. “You’re wrong. He does. And there may be women out there who want it, too. But he doesn’t really need anyone other than Charlie to be happy. And as happy as Charlie makes me, I need so much more than that.”
Garrett crossed his ankle over his knee and pursed his lips. “You deserve all of that, and I’m glad you can see it. But still, Megs, are you really okay with always wondering what if?”
Megan stared. Waited. Then huffed out a breath. “What if, what ?”
“What if you’d pushed him, fought harder to see if what you’re feeling is two-sided? What if I had stopped with Parks? All those stories you hear about the one who got away—you don’t want that to be Adam.”
“But Adam knows what he wants and has very strong feelings about what he thinks is bes
t for Charlie. If he thought, even for a minute, that it was me, he’d have said so. In his robotic, slightly awkward way, he’d have told me I’m what he needs.”
Garrett stood up and pulled her to her feet. “Ahh, but you’re more than what he needs, honey. In fact, I think that’s what has him so scared. It might even be what is making him take this idea of a Stepford wife too far.”
Megan’s brow furrowed. “What might be?”
“The fact that he doesn’t just need you. He wants you. The combination is enough to make any man feel vulnerable. I’m guessing that isn’t a combination he’s particularly comfortable with.”
She bit the inside of her cheek. “He’d push me away before he let himself fall,” she whispered.
Garrett frowned. “Then he’s an idiot and doesn’t deserve you.”
Megan laughed. “I think you’re biased.”
“For good reason.” He sighed. “I gotta go. You have all the power right now. It’s up to you. Find him and Charlie a Stepford wife or show Adam that his heart still works just fine.”
He kissed her cheek, and as he pulled the door open, she saw her shoes sitting, side by side, on the step. Garrett arched a brow, looking down at them and picking them up. He handed them to her, his silent question screaming at her.
“He must have dropped them off,” she whispered, more to herself than Garrett.
Megan looked up to ask Garrett what he thought, but his smile—the slightly cocky and nearly proud one—said everything he felt. Without a word, he looked at the shoes again, then shook his head and gave a low chuckle right before he left.
Was it possible Adam could open his heart again? Could she make him see that they could have a really good life together? A real one? Did she even want that? She was just starting her own career, her own life. The one she’d waited and worked for. She hadn’t even had a boyfriend in years. Megan was too close to having it all to settle for the kind of relationship Adam wanted.
Despite being tired, she took her phone to bed with her and scrolled through some of the profiles on different sites. Could she do anything to show Adam that risking his heart again, even if it wasn’t with her, didn’t have to end badly? Surely, he realized that Charlie deserved a chance to see his dad truly happy. Megan thought of Adam finding happiness—true, bone-deep happiness—and it was like a knife twisting in her side. She wanted that for him. But, alone in the quiet darkness of her cold bed, she could admit a little piece of her wanted him to have it with her. All the years of looking at him as just an employer had gone up in smoke tonight. It would make working for him the rest of the summer harder. The sooner she found him the woman he wanted, the sooner she could quiet the part of her heart that wanted it to be her.
Chapter Ten
Adam lay in bed staring at the ceiling, trying to get the memory of Megan’s lips out of his head—and failing miserably. Charlie shuffled into the room, and Adam welcomed the reprieve from the incessant loop of his thoughts. Charlie rubbed his eyes and crawled up onto the bed, plopping his head down into the crook of Adam’s arm. Squeezing him close, he kissed his son’s head.
“Morning, bud.”
“Morning, Daddy. Didn’t know you were home.” He yawned loudly and snuggled further in.
“Got in late last night.” Then made out with your nanny and it was fucking awesome. No. Not awesome. Totally wrong and over the line. Over? You obliterated the line.
“You gotta go to work?”
“It’s Wednesday, so yeah.”
“When I grow up, I’m going to work from home,” Charlie mumbled.
Adam laughed, glanced at the clock, and gave his boy a tight hug. “I do that sometimes, right? I have to get up. Meg will be in shortly. I have to shower. You going to stay in here?”
“Mmhmm.”
Pulling himself out of bed, surprised by how badly he wanted to just crawl back in with Charlie, he ran his hand over his bare chest. Megan had done the same last night, only he’d been clothed. Fully. And thinking of how incredible it’d be to get her naked. Jesus, fuck. What had he done?
“When am I going to Mom’s?”
Adam stopped in his tracks on the way to his bathroom. Like last night, just the mention of Reece was enough to douse any desire that had burned low in his gut. Turning, he saw Charlie was lying on his pillow, eyes open.
“She called last night. Wants you to come next week. Her shooting schedule got moved. You still okay with that?”
Charlie nodded. “I can’t wait to go to Disneyland. I wish you could come with us.”
Two weeks with Reece. Not a chance. “I know. We’ll go another time together, okay?”
“Yeah, but can you and me and Megan do something special? Like before she leaves? Could we go on a vacation?”
Adam’s heart twisted at the same time his stomach tightened with the thought of being away with Megan. Not a good idea. “We could maybe plan something—a special day, but you don’t really go on vacation with your nanny, bud.”
You don’t really kiss the hell out of her on the couch, either, but that didn’t stop you.
“She’s not just a nanny.”
Your kid is smarter than you. “I know.”
“I could ask Parks and Garrett to help plan something for her,” Charlie said, sitting up now.
It was getting closer to seven a.m., and Adam wanted to get into the office.
“Who?” Parks. Parker. Brother. Who the hell was Garrett? The friend she’d had over last night? As if that hadn’t pissed him off to see headlights in his driveway and some wide-shouldered guy heading up to Megan’s place. Good. She should find someone. Someone that suits her because it’s not you. It was embarrassing to think he’d even tried to get a closer look by bringing her shoes to her door. What had he thought? That they’d exit the house and he’d just interrupt their visit?
“Dad,” Charlie said, rolling his eyes and emphasizing the “a” in “dad.” “Parks is her brother, and Garrett is his boyfriend.”
Oh. Why did that settle his stomach? “Right. Okay. Bud, I have to get ready. Can we talk about this later?”
Charlie flopped back onto the bed. “Fine.”
Adam hurried to the shower and did his best not to think of Megan while in there. Another epic fail. How was he supposed to face her? Would she stay the rest of the summer? Would she still help him find a suitable wife? A stepmom for Charlie? Was there another woman who could even come close to giving Charlie what Megan did? Then why not her, you idiot?
Because he cared about her enough to know that what he was offering wasn’t enough for her. She deserved more than a man several years older than her who not only didn’t want that kind of love, but didn’t believe in it. She was barely twenty-five and had her life ahead of her. He wasn’t that much older than her, but he couldn’t stand the thought of being the person who broke something inside of her the way Reece had with him. Megan had an innocence about her—an unjaded softness that scared him. He didn’t want to disappoint her. And that was humbling.
Or maybe the whole idea is ridiculous. He scrubbed over his wet skin harder than necessary. Here he was thinking about women and wives when all he should be thinking about was nailing the next account.
“Do not complete the next thought about nailing anything else,” he said aloud.
By the time he was dried and dressed, Megan was in the kitchen stirring something in a large silver bowl. Adam’s stomach flip-flopped the second his eyes landed on her. He hated the sensation. It was like free falling, and he didn’t want it.
“Morning,” he said, not looking at her as he grabbed a mug for coffee.
“Morning, Mr. Klein,” she said.
The cup nearly tumbled from his hand. Was she fucking serious? He looked at her, only to see that she was grinning and her eyes, far more awake than he felt, were dancing.
“Funny,” he said.
“I thought so. You want pancakes?”
“No thanks.”
He poured the coffee, a
nd since Charlie was probably in the living room watching TV, he took the moment to quietly speak with her.
“I’m sorry about last night.”
She was grabbing a pan from the lower cabinet, and he was not checking out her ass. Because that was completely unprofessional and wrong.
“I know you are,” she said, standing straight.
His heart stopped at her words. How the hell did she know? Setting the pan on the stove, she turned to face him.
She doesn’t know you were checking her out. Get it together, man.
“Don’t worry about it. It happened. It meant nothing. It’s over. I’m still going to stay and help you find someone for Charlie. And for you.”
Wait. It meant nothing? What the hell? No. Stop. That’s good. That’s what you wanted. But still, a kiss like that? It’d kept him up most of the night. Hardly nothing.
“Thank you. I was worried about that.” She’d said everything he wanted to hear, so why did he feel unsettled?
She nodded and went back to heating up the pan. “I’ve left a list of candidates on your desk and took the liberty of reaching out to one. Her name is Elizabeth. Thirty, attractive,” she said, glancing back over her shoulder. “Very hygienic, I think. Not a huge social media presence. You’re meeting with her tonight at the steak house near your work at seven.”
He stared at his coffee and felt like the liquid sloshing around in the cup. “You set the date up for me?”
“It’s seemed more efficient. Is that okay?”
Adam took a drink, hoping the caffeine would make him feel less like he’d stepped into an alternate reality.
“Of course. I trust you.”
There weren’t many people he could say that about. He gripped his cup, pushing down the urge to reach out and tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “Are we really okay?”
