Let it Be Me

by Jody Holford

  When he walked through the door, he was surprised by how busy it was, considering it was Monday. Dec was behind the bar, arms folded over his chest, head back, laughing at something a customer was saying.

  Adam approached, slid onto a stool. Dec’s smile was easy, which calmed Adam’s worries that his friend was still supremely pissed.

  Dec put a cocktail napkin down in front of Adam. “Hey. What are you doing in here? Want a soda?”

  “Sure. I’ll have one. I called you this morning,” Adam said.

  “Yeah, I saw that,” Dec said as he scooped up some ice and filled a glass. He winked at Adam. “Was otherwise occupied until noon and then I had to cover a shift. Hope I didn’t hurt your feelings not calling you back.”

  Laughing, Adam loosened his tie. Clearly they were fine.

  “How many times have you used that line?” Adam took a sip of the soda Dec slid in front of him.

  “I try to make sure they leave clear on the score. You know that.”

  “About the other night. I wanted to say sorry.”

  Dec nodded and poured himself a soda. “And you did. Don’t worry about it.”

  Coming over to stand by Adam, he took a long swallow of his drink. Music pumped through the speakers, a little too pop for Adam’s liking, but the patrons were happy. Declan had made great strides in his business venture.

  “I slept with her,” Adam mumbled, looking down at the ice in his glass.

  Dec spit pop out of his mouth, some of it landing on the bar but most hitting the floor. Then he started to cough.

  “You okay, sugar?” one of the waitresses called from where she was chatting with a customer.

  Dec held up a hand. “I’m good.”

  He leaned into Adam, forearms on the bar. “You what? Are you fucking nuts?”

  Adam didn’t look up. Dec wouldn’t sugar coat anything. “Nope. Well, maybe a little.”

  His friends straightened and folded his arms back over his chest. “What about your twenty-seven step plan to a perfect life and unfeeling wife?”

  Adam’s head snapped up. He glared at his friend. “Don’t be an ass.”

  “I could say the same. What are you doin’, bro? You don’t do things like this without thinking them through. You care about her.”

  Of course he cared about her. She was a huge part of his son’s life and the reason he could devote so much time toward his goals, knowing Charlie was in her hands. “I couldn’t stop to think. It started happening, and I didn’t want to pause for all the reasons it shouldn’t.”

  A smile spread on Dec’s lips, making dimples appear in both cheeks. “You don’t say. You’ve met a woman who can turn off that goddamn brain of yours. I say marry her.”

  Adam nearly choked the way his friend had. Marry Megan? No. He was no one’s white knight, and that was exactly what Megan longed for. But maybe there was an in-between. A “for now.” He hadn’t wanted one, but he certainly wasn’t ready to say, “Thanks, that was fun.” No, he couldn’t wait to get her back in his bed. Just the thought of it had him shifting uncomfortably on the stool.

  “I have to go. Thanks for the pop and the stupid conversation,” Adam said, getting off the stool.

  Declan laughed from deep in his belly. “No problem, pal. You know you can count on me. Say hi to Megan for me.”

  Adam resisted the urge to flip him the middle finger on his way out the door.

  Marry Megan. What an absolutely ridiculous idea. Even if she wanted to be with a man like him—someone who preferred practical over playful—she wanted to start a life and a family of her own. He had not one doubt about the depth of her love for Charlie, but caring for Adam’s son and wanting to be his stepmother were two vastly different things. Adam tried to think of a movie where the woman fell for a too-serious single dad. Pretty sure Hollywood didn’t see a profit in that story line.

  “Now you’re trying to come up with chick flicks to strengthen your argument?” He was losing it and thinking of things all wrong. Megan didn’t want to marry him. She’d laugh in his face. Wouldn’t she? She’d feel tied down and trapped when she was supposed to be starting her life. No. They weren’t meant for forever.

  But there was nothing stopping them from having an interlude. In fact, the more he thought of it, the more he liked the idea of taking some time for himself and Megan. Charlie would be away. They obviously connected, on several levels, so where was the harm in a little enjoyment? For both of them. Before they parted ways.

  Thinking of how to approach Megan with this, he pulled into the driveway before realizing someone was parked in his spot. He scowled, not recognizing the vehicle. Putting his car in reverse, he adjusted and parked beside the bright red Honda.

  With his briefcase in hand, he entered his home to the sound of laughter. Normally, that would please him, but since he didn’t know who the unexpected guest was, he slipped off his shoes and went to investigate.

  Charlie was on the floor in the kitchen letting a mini car fly down a long narrow strip of orange track that had been set up beside the table. Megan was loading the dishwasher. A man he didn’t recognize sat at the table, a glass of water in hand. A headache thumped at the base of Adam’s neck.

  “Hope I’m not interrupting,” he said, hating the stiffness in his own voice.

  “Dad! You’re home early. Check out this track Parker brought me. Isn’t it cool? It was his when he was a kid.”

  Relief made Adam feel momentary spineless. This large, dark-haired man with a scowl now on his face was Megan’s brother.

  “That is very cool.” He extended his hand to Megan’s brother. “Adam Klein. Nice to finally meet you, Parker.”

  He shook Adam’s hand, but his gaze was cool, making Adam feel as though he was picking up his prom date. It’s my house. Even if I did sleep with your sister in it. Dropping his hand, he leaned down to press a kiss to Charlie’s head.

  “How was your sleepover?”

  “Fun. We stayed up until midnight.”

  Adam looked at Megan and felt an explosion of lust unfurl in his stomach. The intensity stunned him. “Bet that made for a happy day,” he said, hoping his tone didn’t betray how shaky he suddenly felt.

  “He may have fallen asleep for an hour on the couch,” she said, a familiar smile on her lips. She did not look as though lust had invaded every cell of her body and held her captive. She just looked…like Megan. Closing the dishwasher, she glanced at Parker.

  “I’m ready. Dinner is in the oven. I’ll see you boys tomorrow, okay?”

  Parker stood up, and Adam struggled to get his tongue to work. “You’re leaving already?”

  She met his gaze. “Unless you need something?”

  The hair on the back of his neck stood up under Parker’s “big brother” stare.

  Was she that oblivious to the feelings rioting around inside him? How could she just leave without even asking for a word in private? What? So she can kiss you goodbye like you’re going steady?

  She grabbed her purse from the counter and met his gaze, turning so her back was to her brother. “If you need me later or something comes up, you could always text me. Or email me.”

  Adam sucked in a breath and nearly choked on it. He smiled, wishing she wasn’t increasing the physical distance between them. “I’ll be sure to do that.” Shit. Did his voice sound husky? When he looked at Parker, the guy was still mean-mugging him. Charlie was playing with his cars, unaware of the adult tension filling the room.

  “I’ll make sure my phone is on. My parents just got into town. They’ve been traveling, and we’re having dinner. I’m really excited to see them, so we need to go.”

  Her voice softened, even with her excitement, when she spoke of her family. He’d never once felt that toward his own. He did with Charlie, but that was it.

  “Okay. Have fun. Parker, nice to meet you.”

  “Same. See you soon, Charlie. Have fun in Disneyland.”

  Charlie stood and gave Parker a big hug, surprisin
g Adam. Megan took care of his son every day. It made sense that Charlie would have established bonds with other people. He wasn’t sure why it surprised him so much. Or more, why it bothered him.

  “I’ll bring you back something. And Garrett, too.”

  Right. The boyfriend. Someone else Charlie was attached to. Family doesn’t have to mean related. It doesn’t make you less of a father for your son to bond with other men.

  “Good night,” Megan said quietly.

  “Good night,” Adam replied.

  As she walked away, an emptiness settled into the pit of his stomach. He did want to kiss her goodbye, he realized. More than he should.

  “Want to play, Dad?”

  Charlie looked up, eyes wide and sweet. The emptiness disappeared. “Sure do, bud.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  Megan relaxed into the passenger seat of her brother’s truck, breathing slowly, trying to push down the thrill of Adam’s intense gaze and the memory of his email. Focus on your family; he’ll be home when you get there.

  Excitement was winding itself into a ball in her stomach. She missed her parents and couldn’t wait to see them. They rarely went so long without talking, and though they’d been sorry to miss her actual graduation day, they’d celebrate today. As a family.

  “Your boss was looking at you like a starving man at a buffet,” Parker said, switching lanes before stopping at a light.

  Megan’s entire body went rigid. She turned her head, tried to play it cool. “As if.”

  Parks sent her a big-brother glance. She looked away so he didn’t see too much. He wouldn’t want to know, and she had no intention of telling him. Her life. Her business. And her nonstop memories on replay in her head sending a warm rush through her body.

  “You like him.”

  Looking out the window, grateful for the air conditioning, she laughed. “Uh, yeah. I wouldn’t work for someone I didn’t like.”

  Or spend the night in his bed learning everything he liked. She didn’t have a bucket full of experience, but Adam had far surpassed anything she’d imagined. That single-minded nature of his, along with his attention to detail, were attributes she’d never fully appreciated until now. And after the email that had made her smile for the rest of the day, she fully planned on appreciating it as many times as possible before they parted ways.

  “No. You girl-likes-boy-like him.”

  Scrunching her brows together, she turned her head again. “We’re sure you’re older? Because honestly, sometimes I think you’re still twelve.”

  “What? That’s a thing.”

  “Okay. If you say so.”

  “You didn’t deny it.”

  There wasn’t much she could say, so instead, Megan hoped she wouldn’t betray just how right he was. She dug her sunglasses out of her purse and put them on. “There’s nothing to deny. Did Mom and Dad say how long they were staying?”

  “Less than a week, and nice try. Stop skirting around the conversation. Thought he wasn’t the kind of man you’re looking for.”

  In the beginning, she’d thought so too. And you still think so. You know so. He’s not forever. Parker was only saying what she already knew, but irritation blossomed beneath her ribs, filling her chest like air in a balloon. “Oh? The kind of man who’d do anything to make sure his son had everything he needed? Loyal? Funny? Incredibly sexy and driven? Yeah. Definitely not a keeper,” she snapped.

  Realizing everything she’d just said, heat washed over her face. Parker stopped at a light and stared at her, his mouth forming a small O. “Holy shit. I thought you were sleeping with him. I didn’t know you were in love with him. Jesus Christ, Megan. When the hell did this happen?”

  Panic replaced everything else, and she couldn’t breathe. She did not love Adam. She loved Charlie, and she cared for Adam. She’d miss him when she was gone, just like she’d miss Charlie, but she knew they were temporary. Very temporary.

  Forcing out a breath, she was relieved when Parker had to focus on driving again. “I’m not in love with him.”

  “Right.” Parker made a loud scoffing noise. “Been there.”

  “This isn’t like you and Garrett, Parker. It’s not like that at all. We’re just…having fun.”

  “Give me a second. I want you to be able to talk to me, but I just gagged in my mouth.” He breathed out, one corner of his mouth tipping up when she smacked him in the arm.

  “We acted on our attraction. I’ve been so busy thinking about and working toward the future that I forgot I’m allowed to have a now.”

  “You’re definitely entitled to a now.”

  She didn’t need his permission.

  “I’m just not sure you’re built for that,” he added.

  There was no way Megan would admit it out loud, but she wasn’t so sure, either.

  Turning to look at her big brother’s profile, she thought again of him and Garrett. They were a definite happily ever after. But the path hadn’t been as smooth as she’d believed. What did that mean? Nothing. It means nothing because in the end, despite the bumpy path, they both wanted each other for the long haul. Stop. Stop overthinking everything. It was an amazing night, and given the chance, I’m going back for more. Screw ever after.

  “Maybe you don’t know me as well as you think you do,” she said, hoping her voice sounded stronger than she felt.

  “You’re the worst liar ever. Just so you know,” Parker said, pulling into his underground parking stall.

  Getting out of the vehicle, they shut the doors, and he locked the car. He swung an arm around her shoulder and pulled her close.

  “If you knuckle my hair, I’m going to tell Garrett,” she warned.

  “Tattletale,” he mocked.

  But he didn’t touch her hair.

  Megan’s heart knocked against her chest when her brother unlocked the door to his apartment. Her mom was waiting there to greet her. Her dad stood just behind her mom. Both had wide smiles on their familiar faces. With her lungs feeling too tight to pull in air, Megan rushed forward into open arms. It had really been too long this time.

  If Megan were lucky, she’d age as well as Helene Carter. With her dark hair—colored frequently—cropped short and her slightly angular face, she looked young. The lines around her blue eyes only served to make her look happier.

  “I’ve missed you,” her mom whispered, rocking Megan from side to side.

  “Me too. You kids need to stop the whirlwind traveling and settle down near your family,” Megan teased.

  “One day.”

  “My turn. Outta my way,” her dad joked, nudging her mom aside.

  His hugs were like curling into a blanket on a rainy night. A cocoon of warmth and the illusion of safety from the storm.

  “Hi,” she whispered.

  “Hi, baby girl,” he replied.

  The familiar scent of his cologne closed around her just like his arms. He picked her right up off her feet and squeezed her tight. Like her mother, Richard Carter wore his age as well as his tailored clothing. Fit and trim, he spent his days golfing, hanging out with his wife, and sightseeing. It suited him.

  Back on her feet, she stepped away and clasped her hands to her chest. She couldn’t hold back the emotion that pushed to the surface. “I’ve missed you guys.”

  Her mom took her hand and pulled her into the living room where Garrett was putting out some delicious-looking appetizers. “We know, honey. We’re sorry we missed your graduation.”

  “Hey, Garr. Let me take one of those off your hands,” Megan said.

  She grabbed a bite-sized pinwheel and bit into it with a happy sigh as her mother sat down on the couch.

  “Whole family is here. Finally,” he said, tapping her on the nose.

  “Come sit,” her mom said, patting the couch.

  Both of her parents took turns showing her multiple photos of their trip on their iPhones. Most of them were the exact same pictures, which Megan thought was cute enough; she “oohed” and “awed”
anyway.

  “Where to after this?” Megan asked, feeling a pang of loneliness, even though they’d just arrived.

  “We’re thinking of Europe, actually,” her dad said.

  Megan sank back into the couch. Garrett and Parker brought in some chips and homemade salsa, which her dad helped himself to.

  “You can’t take an RV there,” Parker said.

  Megan rested her head against her mom’s shoulder and felt her laughter.

  “True, you can’t. But we’d like to do a big trip, something really special, and then we were thinking of buying a house again,” her dad said.

  Hope fluttered in her chest. How great would it be to have her whole family right here in Maine?

  “Anywhere in particular?” Megan tried to keep her voice even.

  Her mom squeezed Megan’s hand. “Somewhere close enough to see you guys.”

  They exchanged an interesting glance over the top of Megan’s head. Megan smiled at Parker and Garrett before gripping both her mom and dad’s hands.

  “What aren’t you saying?”

  “We found an adorable little house in Providence. We did look closer, but your mother fell in love with this one, and we thought, it’s only an hour,” her dad said.

  “Found like bought?” Garrett asked.

  Her mom nodded. “Yes. It’s like a fairy tale cottage. You guys are going to love it.”

  Megan released both of their hands, happiness surging inside of her. “But what about traveling?”

  “We’ve done a lot of it. We’re ready to settle in and be around for grandbabies,” her dad said, winking at her and then at Parker.

  “Ha. There’s as much chance of me giving you one as there is of Parks getting pregnant,” Megan said, wishing the truth of her joke didn’t make her feel hollow inside.

  “Speaking of that,” Garrett said.

  Megan’s eyes widened, and she pointed at Parker. “You’re pregnant?”

  They all laughed, and Parker stuck his tongue out at her, just before he took Garrett’s hand. “No, smartass. But we’ve started the process to adopt.”

  Megan opened her mouth, ready to squeal her excitement, but Garrett put a hand up. “One more thing,” he said.