by K. D Clark
A knock sounds at the bathroom door, and I jump.
“Hazel, you alright? I’ve been calling your name.”
I hadn’t even heard him.“Yeah, I’m fine. I’ll be out in a minute,” I’m able to keep my voice from cracking as I speak. There’s a minute of silence as if he doesn't believe me. There’s no way I’m going to be able to keep this from him.
“Alright, I’m in my room if you want to hang out.”
I wait until I hear his footsteps retreating before I shove the pregnancy test in the trash can. I wash my face and blot it dry. It still looks like I’ve been crying, so I put some foundation on. I have the thought that Maverick might be suspicious as to why I’m wearing makeup before bed, but then again, men barely notice that kind of thing. I’ll tell him tomorrow when I’m able to think straight. I can’t ruin tonight. I open the bathroom door and cross my bedroom to open the adjoining door to his room. He wears gray sweatpants and a black t-shirt, flipping through a book as he sits up against the headboard.
I spot the light switch on the wall next to me and flip it off. He doesn’t say anything as I crawl into his bed. The book is set down on the nightstand with a thud. If everything is going to change after I tell him tomorrow, I at least want to feel him one more time. I need to run my hands over his hard body and imprint it on my memory. He scoots down in the bed, his face inches from mine. The moonlight flows through the window, so I’m able to see his face. For a second, I imagine a baby boy with identical deep blue eyes. He places his hand on the curve of my waist and moves it over my hips. His rough hands on my naked skin causes me to shiver.
“Tell me this is really what you want,” he says, his voice coming out husky and almost like he’s in pain. It feels like it has been forever since he was last inside me. He’s such a gentleman, waiting until I felt ready for his touch again.
“I want you,” I say. It’s true. I mostly felt directionless, not knowing what my next step in life is going to be, but I knew I wanted Maverick to be a part of it. I might not be ready to join him in business, but he put his life on the line to save me. He held me at night when I had nightmares. He’d done more for me than any other man had, and I wanted to spend every day with him. I hated that he worked so much, and I was sometimes left alone in the house because I could be spending that time with him.
He groaned before grabbing me and flipping us over so that I straddle his hips. He’s already hard and ready for me. I ground my hips against him, and he reaches up to feel my breasts underneath my shirt. My nipples harden under his touch. His thumb moves over my pointed nipples, and my body heats up. His touch is like lava, and I’m like ice. My body melts into him. My pussy is already soaking wet, I don't need any more foreplay, but as he sits up and closes his mouth over my nipple, I shudder.
“Fuck, that feels good,” I moan. He grips my ass with both hands and moves me against his dick. I hadn’t realized I’d stopped moving. As I ground against him, I remove my shirt and then tug at his. I need to feel his body now. It has been way too long. He breaks away from me to take his shirt off. I lift from his lap so he can pull his pants down. He isn’t wearing boxers, so his cock springs free. Thick and veiny. My eyes widen at the size. I’d forgotten how big and thick he is.
“Lay on your back,” he demands.
His voice is that of authority. I imagine this was the kind of tone he uses to run his arms-dealing business. It shouldn’t turn me on, but it does. I want him to tell me exactly how he wants me. I need him to give me everything he’s offering. Everything feels comfortable with him as if we’ve always known each other.
I lay on my back and shove off my shorts and panties, so I’m completely exposed. It’s dark in the room, so he can’t see everything clearly, but even if he could, I wouldn’t have been embarrassed. There was a sense of comfort with him that I can’t explain. He would never make me feel insecure about myself. I thought he’d climb on top of me, but he takes me by surprise. He gets off the bed.
“Where-”
He grabs my legs and drags me, so my ass is at the foot of the bed. He places his hands on the backs of my thighs, opening me wide for him before lowering himself to his knees. Holy shit, is he going to… His tongue licks a clean line from my entrance to my clit. His warm mouth closes over my pussy, causing my legs to shake.
“Oh shit, Maverick.” My words come out breathless. I grip his hair on instinct, needing something to hold onto. He continues to lick and explore while his grip on my thighs tightens. I’m on edge. I can feel the tingling building up in my body.
“Maverick...I… Fuck...I’m about to-”
He removes his mouth from my pussy, and the coolness of the bedroom air hits me. I was about to complain, but he stands to his feet and shoves his dick inside me. The fullness takes me over the edge. My legs shake, and my vision blurs. He keeps my legs spread open as he stands over me and relentlessly pounds. His hard body hits my clit with each thrust. His balls smack my ass, filling the bedroom with a consistent slapping noise. It isn’t long before he lets out a low groan and finishes inside me. My pussy continues to throb as he fills me up. I never want him to pull out of me because as soon as he did, I’d have to come back to reality.
***
I wake up to the bright sunlight peeking through the curtains. My head is on something hard, and it takes me a minute to realize it’s Maverick’s chest. I’m still naked from our session last night, and my body clings to his.
“Are you awake?” he whispers, the sound making his chest vibrate. I slam my eyes shut.
He chuckles. “We could sleep all day, but I thought you’d at least want breakfast.”
At the word “breakfast," I slide off his chest and back to my side of the bed. I look up at his face. He has some stubble along his jawline since he hasn’t shaved yet this morning. His skin is bright and relaxed, exactly how it should be while on vacation.
“What time is it?” I ask.
“Almost ten.”
My eyes widen. “I’m surprised you slept in.” Usually, he was up and at the gym before the sun came up.
He shrugs. “I don't want to wake you.”
He climbs out of bed and stands to his feet. My eyes zero in between his legs; he hadn’t bothered to get dressed after our session either. His lips lift into a smile.
“Maybe we can come back to bed after we eat,” he suggests.
I nod my head like a dog waiting for a treat. He laughs before pulling on his sweatpants, kissing me on the forehead, and then heading for the kitchen. I lay back in the bed and look up at the ceiling fan above my head. I have to tell him today. A baby is growing inside me, and I don't want to keep it a secret. Even though I’m utterly terrified of the possibility that the father might be Miles. I can’t help but also feel a hint of excitement. I’ve always wanted to be a mother, and I had accepted the fact that it might never happen for me. No matter what, I’ll love my child with all I have. If Maverick doesn't want anything to do with me, I’ll take all the money from Miles’s estate and move back to America. Start my life over again, maybe live in a nice suburb and work during the day at a law firm. I could do that. It isn’t ideal. Maverick has become such a big part of my life in this small amount of time, but it’s comforting to know I’ll be okay. No matter what the outcome, I’ll be able to stand on my own two feet. It has been so long since I felt like I was able to do that. I’d been under Miles’s control for so long that I forgot what it was like to be independent.
With a deep breath, I get out of the bed and walk into Maverick’s bathroom. After taking a shower, I go back into my bedroom to change into an outfit for the day; then I walk down to the kitchen. Maverick stands at the island, filling up two plates with eggs, toast, and bacon. His naked chest is on display, his lion tattoo big and prominent.
“I thought you might have fallen back asleep,” he jokes.
“I thought about it.” I sit at the long wooden table, and he walks over with both plates. He pushes one in front of me.
“Thank you.”
He nods and starts to eat. I eat slowly, picking at my food as my stomach knots up. My stomach was rumbling earlier, but now all I can concentrate on is the words that are about to come out of my mouth. No matter what his response is, I'll be okay. I remind myself.
“You’re not eating,” he notes. I look up from my plate to see his dark eyes on me. They’re filled with amusement.
The words are lifted from my chest and thrown across the table. “I’m pregnant.”
“I don’t think it happens that fast,” he says with a playfulness in his tone.
“I’m serious, Maverick.”
He stares at me. The realization must have been sinking in because his face starts to fall. His eyes turn dark, and his lips flatten into a deep frown.
“I took a test last night.”
The kitchen is so quiet you could hear a pin drop. I stop breathing as I wait for him to say something...anything.
“Mine?” he asks.
“I don’t know,” I admit, my voice coming out small.
I jump as he stands up from the table. His chair scrapes against the tile floor. The side of his jaw twitches like he’s clenching his teeth together. My heart races. This was it. This is when he would change. Where his behavior would switch, just like Miles. I hadn’t noticed I’d started crying, but the tears hit my lip, and I can taste the saltiness. Maverick turns away from me and walks away.
A moment later, the front door slams shut, causing the paintings on the wall to shake. The middle of my chest feels empty. As if he had ripped my heart out and thrown it on the ground. Covering my face with my hands, I allow myself to sob. This will be the last time I cry over a man. When we get back to Tahiti, I’ll call my real estate agent and ask her to lower the price on Miles’s estate so it can sell faster. Then I’ll get a plane ticket out and go back to America. I’ll stay in a hotel for a while if I have to while I wait for the estate for sale. I would be okay.
Chapter Twelve: Coping
Maverick
She’s probably freaking out that I’ve been gone for hours. I wasn't mad at her. How could I be? Miles raped her, and in return, he paid with his life. But it’s like even from the grave he’s found a way to fuck up our lives. I had started to see a future with Hazel. We would stay in Tahiti. I could run my company while she did whatever she wanted. I was ready to support her if she wanted to continue practicing law. Maybe down the line, we would talk about marriage and kids, but now I don't know where to go.
“Otro?” the bartender asks. Seeing if I want another three fingers of whiskey. I shake my head.
I need to go home. When I left the house, I told my security to stay with Hazel. It’s foolish for me to be out in public, buzzed, and without protection, but I hadn’t been thinking straight. All I could focus on was the baby. It could be my child. I had never thought about kids too much, but I knew one thing. My mother stayed with my dad because of me. She suffered his abuse because she felt obligated to stay. Hazel didn't want to go into business with me because she didn't want to feel stuck. If she was pregnant with my child, that was probably exactly how she’d feel. If down the line, we started to hate each other, I didn't want to end up forcing a relationship just because of a kid. Children shouldn’t have to witness a broken relationship.
I had always been careful with other women. Even if they said they were on birth control, I always wore a condom. I’m worth a lot of money and I know some women would like to have some sort of hold on me. But with Hazel, both times we’d had sex, a condom was the furthest thing from my mind. Now, look at the situation I’m in.
The tug of war in my mind festers like moldy cheese. I stand from the barstool, glad to see that my mind is still sharp enough to drive. It would be embarrassing to have to call Mike to pick me up.
Once I get home, I go straight up to Hazel’s room. The rest of the house is dark. The only light comes from the bottom of her bedroom door. I knock, but don't wait for a response before turning the knob and walking inside. She’s sitting on the bed cross-legged. The TV across from her is playing some kind of home decorating show. The window in the bedroom is open. The sound of the ocean acts as background noise. I wonder if she’s gone down to the beach today. This vacation was supposed to be a celebration. Guilt settles in my stomach. She looks at me like a stranger. As if we hadn’t woken up in the same bed this morning. All the crying has made her face puffy, but she still looks beautiful to me. I want to pull her in and breathe in her goodness.
“Can I come in?” I ask, even though I’m already half-way in the room.
“It's your house.”
Damn, that hurt. I don't want her to feel like a charity case, far from it. She’s a very wealthy woman. I take a seat on the bed.
“Listen,” she says, breaking through the tension. “This isn’t ideal, and I understand that you’re mad or confused or whatever, but that’s your issue. If you don’t want anything to do with me, then fine. But if this child is yours, don’t expect me to come running back. I don’t expect you to raise another man's child, that’s not what you signed up for when you helped me. But no matter what, I’m going to love my baby, so just tell me if you want me to leave and I will.”
She’s giving me a way out. I could tell her to leave, and I could go back to my life. A life that consisted of running my business and having sex with whoever I wanted. That lifestyle doesn't appeal to me as much as it used to. What kind of father would I be if I turned my back on her completely, knowing that she could be carrying my kid?
“Hazel, I’ve been walking around for hours trying to make sense of all of this. It’s not the kid’s fault, regardless of who the father is. I don’t want you to leave. Outside of that, I don’t know what to tell you about us...”
She stands from the bed and walks toward the window. Her back is to me as she speaks.“I don’t know either, Maverick. I mean, thanks for everything. I don’t know how I feel right now.”
Shit’s hitting the fan, and it pretty much feels like a doomed situation. We’d started on the wrong foot. I mean, I found her buck naked with another man.
“I just…” Her voice trails off.
“I think we should just cool it for a minute. Let’s take a time-out.” The words burn as they come out.“I’m not abandoning you. I just need time to figure this shit out.”
She waves me away. “Don’t explain anymore, Maverick. I get it.”
***
“Don’t touch her!” I screamed at my father. He wore one of his white t-shirts with beer stains all over it. The stench of alcohol filled the room. He turned to face me, and suddenly I started to shrink, or he seemed to grow taller. He loomed over me, his eyes red-rimmed and full of anger.
“Shut up, boy. Get the fuck outta here and go to your room, you little runt.” He pushed me back into the corner of the room. I hit the ground hard. Something sharp stabbed into my leg, and tears filled my eyes. When I looked up, he’d turned his focus back. I came at him again, ignoring the pain in my leg, as he raged upon my mother. He was lunging for her throat.
“You bitch,” he spat, his voice full of rage.
“Get off her!”
“Mav, just go in the other room, honey,” my mother begged me.
“Now you’re gonna get it. I told you to stay out of my way!” I don't have enough time to duck the punch or the flurry of them that followed. He pummeled me to the ground, then stormed out. My bloody and swollen face was left as evidence.
Sweat covers my body, and my heart is pounding out of my chest. It takes a while for me to realize where I am. Home. I kick the blanket off me so I can cool down. The darkness of the room puts me at ease. I can’t remember the last time I’ve had a nightmare. It was before Hazel got here. Although it wasn’t really a nightmare, more like a memory. One I’d have liked to forget.
Running a hand over my face, I let out a sigh. There’s no way I can go to sleep now. My phone reads that it’s four in the morning. Grabbing my sweatpants off the gro
und, I pull them on and walk down to the gym. I slow down as I pass Hazel’s room, listening to see if I can hear any movement. We’ve been home for a week, and we haven’t spoken a word. I know she has a doctor’s appointment coming up. I’d overheard Isabella making the appointment, but Hazel hasn’t said anything. Did I want her to invite me along? I still couldn’t figure out what the fuck I wanted. I wanted her in my bed. I knew that. And I don't want her to be pregnant with that fucker’s baby. When I realized she was probably sound asleep, I continued down the hallway. Grabbing my headphones that sit on the small table near the door of the gym, I turn my music up and start to work out. I won’t stop until I’m completely exhausted. It’s the only way I’d sleep.
Chapter Thirteen: Planning
Hazel
I sit cross-legged on the made bed with a notebook in front of me. I’d woken up with the idea this morning, and now this notebook is full of scribbles of my brainstorming. Since I had been avoiding Maverick, I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my career. If this doesn't work out between us, I will have to go back to work. But I know it’s also ideal for me to be home with my baby as much as possible. That’s the reason I quit my job in the first place; because I thought me and Miles would have a baby and I’d stay home for a while.
Consulting. It’s something I can do from home most of the time, and if a company hires me to be in the office, it will be short-term. I’ll have the ability to pick and choose what projects I want to take on. If I, for some reason, stayed in Tahiti, I could work entirely online by skyping clients. It’s the perfect business model for my new life. There’s a lot of work I’ll have to do to get set up. I need to become an LLC and get all the correct licenses. There’s also a ton of stuff I have to research, but I’m happy to have something to occupy my mind other than Maverick.
A light knock sounds at my door, and I know it’s Isabella.
