Persona

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Persona Page 38

by Amy Lunderman


  She just knows he’s talking smack, because the man is sitting across the room at one of the tables reading a novel. So much for him being her teacher or some crap.

  He glances up at her and clears his throat none too subtly, and she abruptly shuts her eyes closed. It’s too late though; she was totally caught not concentrating. That is what she was supposed to be doing; concentrating.

  On what, she has no idea.

  All he told her was that she had to clear her mind of all thoughts, and just focus on everything else. Sitting here in the quiet room, filled with books that smell strongly of old musty ink; she has to wonder if she is just wasting her time. It should be easier to empty her mind, but for some reason, she just can’t do it. One thing she was great at before any of this was her ability to focus on just feeling her persona. Now, she’s lucky if she even feels it before it take over her.

  She picks up on the fresh scent of herbs laced with a spicy hint of cinnamon, a second before she hears approaching footsteps.

  Opening her eyes, and trying to not look so useless as she feels, she finds that Marshall is now kneeling next to her a good foot away. He doesn’t look disappointed though, like she thought he might, but instead looks thoughtful.

  “Having some trouble relaxing are we?” He says with a hint of a smile.

  Not bothering to lie, she simply nods at him. In returns his smile goes wide as he appears like he already knew that.

  “Try to not completely focusing on trying to relax. Just focus on all of your senses, and let them lead you. Try to take anything and everything in at the same time, until there is just you and your persona.”

  Taking a deep breath, she nods again as he gets to hit feet again and heads back over to the table and his waiting book. By the time he sits down again, Moira closes her eyes and tries to do what he just told her.

  It’s a lot more work than someone would think, just trying to concentrate; but then maybe others have it easier.

  Realizing she is getting distracted again, Moira halt’s her mind from wandering to things that will no doubt trap her. She takes deep and even breathes, and zeroes in on the scents of the room; starting with Marshall, since his is the most powering. Just beneath his spiced herbal scent, she then picks up on the musty ink of all the books again. This time they seem almost stronger to her nose, and as she breathes it in, she scents the leather of the mat under her.

  The leather smells almost like new, still strong, but at the same time there is a used quality to it; like if she tried hard enough she could smell who the last ones that were near it. Before she can even think about freaking over that, something spicy sweet tickles her senses.

  It’s like the smell of a fresh warm wind blowing across an apple orchard in late autumn. She instantly wonders if she smells the trees that are just outside, but then she feels the light caress of tingles dancing across her skin. It has been so long since she felt this, that it takes her a moment to realize that it’s her persona and that isn’t all.

  She vaguely remembers Liam telling her that her persona smells like apples to him. If she smells apples now and at the same time feeling her persona, she has a thought if maybe she is scenting herself.

  She doesn’t try to think too much though, and instead lets the sensations play across her body and senses alike.

  It used to always start like that, like tiny bugs crawling all over her and her skin breaks out in goose bumps from it. Moira thinks of this feeling as a warning system, that she is about to lose control, well she used to anyway, now she lets it be the one to take charge.

  In her mind, she pictures herself sitting here on the floor and slowly envisions her hair changing from wavy strawberry blonde to a silky auburn mass of curls. Brought on by the thought, the tingling travels along her scalp and she feels her hair rising up from her back and settling past her shoulders.

  Concentrating now, she pictures herself standing in front of a mirror so that she is staring into her hazel eyes and see’s that they look like a mix between green and brown. The tingling travels from her scalp to her eyes making them itch and water for a second, and she knows that if she were to look at them, they would be changing to a deep emerald color.

  She keeps her eyes closed though, as to not be distracted by her heightened sight. Taking a deep breath, she empty’s her mind further and concentrates on just letting her persona wash over her with a newfound ease, that she didn’t even realize was missed.

  The next part is a little difficult, but after a while she feels her hands tingle.

  They feel like they were asleep and are slowly waking up; it starts in her palms and travels up into her fingertips. She has to force them to remain still, where they lay draped across her knees. And without any pain, she feels her nails grow out and not having to look she knows they are pointed at the tips now.

  Now that the rest is complete, the tingling travels throughout her body again, and migrates to her neck. It feels like a muscle spasm for a second, and she has to remain calm and control her breathing. From her neck, it lingers up into her jaw so that her gums feel like they are vibrating.

  She feels a stinging sensation almost to the point of pain and then it’s gone, as she feels her teeth push up. Opening her mouth slightly, she makes room for her teeth to elongate into sharpened points.

  Smiling, she finally opens her eyes.

  When she does, she finds that Marshall is kneeling in front of her smiling again. His features are much clearer to her sharpened eyes, and she can physically sense that he is struggling to keep his persona at bay. His grey eyes keep flickering to the bright color of Liam’s own lavender; and she has a great feeling of pride.

  She can’t stop the laughter that pours out of her, because it had been too long since she could call on her persona without having to be past the point of anger. She feels oddly peaceful and powerful all at the same time, and not the crazy untamable powerful as of late either.

  “See, I knew you could do it. Now try doing it in reverse. Concentrate on nothing but letting your persona ease out of you piece by piece.”

  She wants to argue so badly, as she watches him walk away from her again. And here she thought she finally mastered her skill, but apparently not.

  Knowing she has to bide her time, and let him feel like he can trust her, especially if she really wants to help Marty.

  And getting Marshall’s trust is key, more so if she wants him to agree in helping her in a crazy plan.

  So, even though she wants nothing more than a nap and maybe a glass of water, Moira focuses on her breathing again. She lets the tingling bee hive of her persona flow though her body, and sets her mind at ease.

  ***

  Liam is in his room later that night feeling antisocial, and thinks himself a wuss for not going into the barn to see Moira. He knows he should have, she does have a right to know what is going on. Or more importantly, to know that what he thinks is going on. He would give anything to make it up to her, and even more, it makes him angry that he wants that in the first place.

  Then there is the topping on the cake, in which he didn’t even stand up to his father. Liam totally just let him talk him out of doing anything at all. Like the man said though, it could only end one way, and that would have been the bad way; for the both of them. There is too much going on, to have the only two guys on the bench because of a father and son squabble.

  And so, lying on his bed and aimlessly gazing around him room seems like the best way to stay out of trouble. His room is bland, as he is never at home for long periods of time. He does however, have the amenities of a bed, dresser, desk, and a burrow of a large collection of classic novels. The wall over his desk is littered with maps of the region and tacks representing pack members that live there.

  He knows it’s not exactly the kind of room most guys his age have, but then, he isn’t really the average guy. He does wonder though, if one day he could actually feel normal enough to have some pretty decent digs; he dismisses the thought with a
laugh though.

  He is in no way ever being interested in decorating, anything, ever.

  Wishing he could just go to sleep and wake up with all this crap over and done with, Liam knows he can’t, even if he wanted to. Mostly because, he knows that his trusted ‘friends’ are probably sitting in the woods right this second around a huge smoking fire.

  One in fact that he distinctly remembered telling them not to do; but whatever, he’s only the one in charge.

  He will however, give them a little time to enjoy it, before he breaks it up. And to keep him from doing that, Liam seriously needs a distraction from his empty quiet room. What is a better distraction than finding out what is going on in the world around them?

  Nothing, this is why his cellphone is placed against his ear and ringing. Charles answers at the third ring, even for the late hour.

  “Can I help you with something Morgan?”

  “Good evening to you too Charles.” Liam says with a smile.

  “Hey, don’t try to get cute with me. The boys are in bed and this is the first time Jo and I are alone. So make it snappy, if you don’t mind.”

  Now Liam is not only smiling but, he is laughing now too. Apparently there is a reason his friend answered the phone too fast; he is in a hurry.

  “Sorry, I don’t want to keep you. I just was hoping you have an update for me. I could really use some news.”

  Charles sighs on the other end of the line, and Liam has the feeling that there is nothing to share.

  “There still isn’t anything to share Liam, not even a peep. I even looked into the group you said took the girl, but none of them were even picked up at the scene.”

  Liam clenches the phone tightly in his hand, and has to relax it when the phone creaks from the pressure. Hearing his fears confirmed that it’s most likely that Marty and Gordon aren’t even with Fletcher; makes him seriously want to hit something.

  He wants to storm around the house for his father and scream at the man, but figures that isn’t the best approach. He’ll have to do what Marshall wants, which is to wait; until he has proof anyway. Even if it kills him to do it.

  “Alright, I’ll let you get back to your hot date. Just keep me posted will you.”

  Liam hangs up the phone without saying good bye, mostly because he isn’t even sure Charles was still on the phone. Most likely he wasn’t. Charlie isn’t really knows for his patience, and add a pretty woman to the mix, and he’s done for. And Liam knows he’ll be done for too, if he stays hidden in his room much longer.

  He is on his feet and running down two flights of stairs before he gets to the first floor, and doesn’t stop until he is at the bottom of the back porch stairs. He’d like to think that he came to his senses and decided to just go back inside and not be a dick.

  But no, something that caught his attention made him stop. And that something is in the form of a certain thick spicy scent of freshly cut apples.

  “Where are you running off to boy?” Marshalls voice cuts through the night behind him.

  Liam freezes but jumps on the inside, while he turns around with a scowl on his face. His father is leaning on the doorjamb leading back into the porch.

  The man looks to be at too much ease for his tone of voice.

  “Just going for a run; blowing off some steam.” Liam tries to say nonchalantly.

  “Is that what you and your friends call a bonfire, because I have some other phrases for something like that.”

  Liam’s eyes go wide before he can control his features, and this of course makes his father snort out a short laugh.

  “I’ve known about them for a while now yes, it would take a fool not too. Are you going to join them or shut it down?”

  “Shut it down.” Liam says quickly, like he doesn’t want to get into trouble or something.

  “Good, it’s not exactly subtle now is it?”

  Marshall is turning away back into the house, and Liam knows he shouldn’t, but he can’t help wanting to tell him about his brief chat with Charlie.

  “Charles hasn’t heard anything still you know. Gordon and the kid may not have been arrested and you know what that means.”

  His father pauses mid turn and goes stock still. Liam can physically feel the old mans persona before his earthy plant spiced scent fills the space around them.

  “You know where I stand on this Liam. So go and break up your friend’s party before we have to worry about the police showing up here.”

  His father springs into motion and walks back into the house in a blur without saying another word or even looking back at Liam. Who by the way is feeling shot down at the moment.

  Clearly he didn’t play it cool and ended pissing the man off, but dammit, they do have a time sensitive situation on their hands. With Marshall gone from the area, his scent leaves as well and Liam is left with the freshly cut apples of Moira own scent again.

  It doesn’t take a genius, to know that she isn’t even close by though, but he isn’t worried about not being able to find her. Using the scent as a trail, and feeling very much the hound dog, Liam walks out into the yard and uses his nose to find her.

  He picks up his pace the closer he gets to the woods, and even more so when her scent changes to the sharp tang of something sour. He knows now, that the scent change is attributed with her moods apparently.

  He is running full out.

  ***

  Sitting outside on a cool night, on logs surrounding a pit full of fire with a bunch of teenagers, isn’t exactly Moira’s idea of a good time. That can’t be said for her traitorous friends though; they seem to be loving the whole out door motif.

  She would too, if it wasn’t a cool fall night, where she is currently being attacked by mosquitoes; and the occasional bug too.

  The mosquito in question is a buff blonde guy, who introduced himself as Lucas. Not that she really cares who he is, only because she’d prefer to be back in her room practicing with her persona again. When she finally left the library, Marshall had her convinced that she was packing some serious persona heat.

  Ignoring the boy trying to talk her up, Moira takes in her surroundings more properly. The clearing is larger than she would have thought, but then again, they are in the woods. It was a pretty short trip once they all left jumped the fence. And it was very comical watching everyone leap over a fifteen or so foot fence.

  She and Raven with Daisy and Ray, at met up with William just outside the main house some time ago. Together, they all trekked to the fence and were met with about twenty kids their age. That was when she met Lucas, who seemed to zoom in on her almost instantly.

  If she wasn’t known for the fugitive freak, she might have thought she was looking good tonight. As it was, she with the help of Raven and Daisy had decided to dress up.

  She really needs to give who ever shopped for her some major props, because they were certainly on point with her size. She really hopes it wasn’t Marshall, because that would be super weird.

  Regardless, she is decked out in a short jean skirt with a long sleeved sheer lavender top and of course with a cami under that. She even found a pair of lavender flats that fit her perfectly, courtesy of Daisy. Where the girl had those hidden of their cross country trip, she has no clue.

  And, for a bonus, her strawberry blonde curls actually decided to behave tonight. That makes going out in public almost worth it. It hangs over her shoulders with its usual limp way, but the curls are more curly than usual. If she knew she wouldn’t stand out, she’s try to only change her hair, and let her auburn curls come forward.

  But she would never though, it would be to stand-outish and that is the last thing Moira needs right now.

  Getting over the fence was a little tricky in the skirt, but she couldn’t back out. Especially since there were a few others with shorter ones than hers; and they didn’t seem to have a problem. She did notice they flashed more than a smile though when they jumped to the top; so waiting to go last was pretty wise on her part.
r />   The boy Lucas kept trying to help her, so she could go before him. It was laughable the way he kept insisting, but now way was she going to show him some skin. After finally getting him to go before her, and that she would be fine; she had noticed that it was just her with her friends now.

  A sinking feeling had formed in her gut; that this night was as close to a date night, which any of them had ever had. It’s depressing to know that the last date she had, ended badly.

  What’s worse is that said date is what lead up to all this crazy she calls her life now. One dumb boy and a prank later, and she still finds herself all alone and boyfriendless.

  It’s no fault but her own she knows. She had all the time in the world to be with the one person she clicked with, and she went and ruined it all over a jock that looked good in running shorts. When Ray and Liam help the girls over the fence and quickly joined then right after, only then did she snap out of her thoughts.

  Now really alone, she heard the others on the other side; wondering if they would wait for her or not. Best not to find out though, who knows what, could happen being lost in the woods; maybe eat a bear for dinner?

  Using the freshly honed practice of her persona again, Moira closes her eyes and clears her mind of everything but where she is. It didn’t take long for her to focus on just the scent, mostly because she is in the woods and the whole place is fresh with moss and something like a cool breeze as it passes over water. Taking deep breaths, she can feel the familiar tingle of her persona playing across her skin now.

  Rather than letting it come forward for a complete change, she just welcomes the light kiss of it and opens her eyes to gaze up at the fence. Fueled with her persona, she slowly bends at the knees while focusing on the tiniest tipped point of the fences top.

  Before she can think about how scared she would be to fall off, she uses all her strength and pushes off the ground.

  With strangely cat like reflexes, Moira flings herself through the air and somehow manages to land with a soft touch at the top of the fence. Not bothering to hold back her laughter, she peers over the side to see Raven and Daisy waiting for her.

 

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