“I wonder how strong I am,” the user said to himself and looked around his flat. He had a piece of “furniture” made by a wooden plank sitting on two cement blocks. He emptied the plank of his various stuff and picked up the cement block with his new second-hand cyberarm. He could actually lift the block by himself, even back before the accident, but he would need to put both arms to it and struggle. This time, he just picked the thing up as if it was a balloon. His knees protested a bit though.
armd> I’m such a badass.
The user put the cement block back down in front of him and sat down on the floor. He pulled up his smartphone and searched for “karate chops.”
parrotd> The user demands videos!
httpd> Already on it.
The user and his daemons studied the video of a man in a karate suit breaking a cement block with his hand. He mimicked his actions and brought down the cyberarm in… well, a karate chopping motion. The matte black hand went through the cement as if it was slapping water, sending bits of concrete flying across the room and raising up dust and particles.
eyed> What’s happening?
parrotd> Everything’s red all of the sudden!
The user lay still for a few seconds, holding his breath and gritting his teeth. Then he held his prosthetic arm to his chest and fell on the floor in a foetal position and yelled out till his throat dried.
parrotd> What the hell man?
armd> He didn’t send me the command to switch off the pain receptors! Read the fucking manual dude!
parrotd> Don’t you know? Humans never read the manual!
walkmand> Are you trying to kill -9 our user?
armd> Woo hoo! Show me that blow in slo-mo. I obliterated that thing!
httpd> The fridge is sending that order in again…
parrotd> Just swipe it away…
The user simply cried on the floor and decided not to try that stupid shit ever again.
Chapter 5:// Going over
The user walked out again and drew a familiar path, spacing out along the way. Lovely tunes from his childhood blurted out to his ears and he let the music glide him to his best friend’s house.
Thoughts came and went to his mind.
He had no money left. That sandwich at the clinic’s cafeteria had taken a big chunk of his cash, but he needed it. He had just recovered from a serious accident after all.
He needed to get to work first thing in the morning. Mr. Robertson would not let him take any more paid leave after he had been out of the hospital. The insurance company had gone in and legally taken every bit of savings he had in his account.
His fridge was empty, and his landlord would demand the rent any minute now.
He was lost in thought but his reptilian brain demanded his attention and made him jerk up. A snake charmer, some Indian guy with a turban on his head was sitting by the side of the road and blowing his tunes with his flute. A cobra snake, big and fat almost as the user’s thigh, was swaying slowly to the music. The snake charmer’s gaze fell on the user with almost a palpable weight. The user shuddered. The snake charmer had one glass eye, or at least it looked like it was a glass one. White like milk, giving him a very scary look, especially when contrasted with his dark brown skin.
The user leaned close carefully as the snake charmer carried on his tune, as if holding the dangerous reptile by auditory reigns. He took out his paycard, and touched it to the street peddler’s device that was laid out on the pavement. A soft gling confirmed the transaction, and he pulled his hand back quickly.
He laughed at himself as he remembered that his carbon fibre prosthetic arm had little to fear from a snake bite, but decided not to test it anyway.
He wished the snake charmer a good day, and the cobra to try not to eat people today.
The cobra hissed.
The user walked on quick and steady to his buddy’s house.
Chapter 6:// Catching up
They logged on the wifi babesbabesbabes. It was horrible, cheap, routed from a device with no recent updates or security fixes, hidden under a mountain of discarded clothes.
A young man opened the door. He was wearing a bright red lifeguard suit and nothing on top, sweetly tanned muscles all over the place and had loose medium-length golden hair. “Hey bro, heard you were coming out today. Oh man, soz, couldn’t wake up at all, you know? Why didn’t you call?”
“It’s fine,” the user said. “I needed to stretch my legs anyway, too much lying around.”
fingerd> Finally! What a cheap slow connection this is… I fingered her.
armd> Ugh… I think you are bugging out or something. This isn’t a female.
A stream of social media selfies popped up of a juicy mature woman, posing in hundreds of different places and locations, with lattes, shopping, friends, bags, shoes, all triple filtered as if a toddler had spilt drool on the lens and taken up photography.
fingerd> I think you are right. Two fingers at once! What a day!
armd> Heh. Heh. Heh.
The user swiped away the stream of silicone boobs and selfies that popped up on his vision and asked, “Do you have company?”
The young man stroke a proud pose and said, “Of course I do.” Then he whispered, emphasising with his hands, “perfect boobies man!”
fingerd> Got it! This man is [email protected] and he has recently changed his relationship status to “in a relationship” with [email protected]
A stream of last night’s photos that the “couple” had uploaded last night became the digital ghost of the party. The user looked around the living room and could only see the aftermath, but the online evidence completed the picture just nicely. Drugs, thongs, booze, fondling in various positions and selfie taking for two. Lots and lots of selfies for two. The young/old couple had the body and the social media following to attract hundreds of likes and shares from lonely, envious people. It was kinda artistic in a certain way.
“Yeah, I can see that,” the user said and swiped it away.
walkmand> Oh don’t! Hey, did you cache any of that?
parrotd> How many times has [email protected] been coupled anyway?
httpd> He has changed his relationship status to “in a relationship” and back to single again 67 times.
armd> Busy guy.
“She’s asleep. Not to brag, but I got stamina. Come on in,” [email protected] said and threw some pizza boxes on the floor to clean up a spot in the sofa.
The user checked carefully for stains before sitting down.
Amazing Jimmy, that was his name, brought a couple of cold beers from the fridge. It was the only thing set on his priority list for the smart fridge’s automatic ordering, so he never ran out. He had ran out a few times to be honest, but he had to really, really try and then had to belch really, really loud. He had legally changed his surname because of the old Amazing Spiderman comics that he’d dug up in his dad’s old comicbook subscription service. He thought it would help bring in the girls. Not that he needed any real help in that matter as he was a lifeguard, working in the popular Greek islands during the summer and at an expensive 5 star hotel’s heated swimming pool during the winter. Jimmy had a year-long suntan and the body male swimsuit models only wished they had. Loose hair and a dentist’s masterpiece of a smile brought in the girls alright.
It wasn’t uncommon for ladies to drown on purpose just to be saved by Jimmy.
He wasn’t very bright, but he was a good friend.
“Hey, have you seen that snake charmer next street? Really weird guy. He has a cobra. A big one,” the user said.
Jimmy leaned out the window, but the snake charmer was around the corner so he couldn’t see. “Really bro? How awesome is that? We should check it out with Bibi when she wakes up.
“So, who’s the new girl,” the user said mocking his own choice of words.
“Tease all you like bro, this lady, is like, experienced man,” said Jimmy, bobbing
his head up and down. “Like, years of experience, ya get my drift?”
“She looks damn fine for her age. Where did you meet?”
“At work. By the pool. You know how it is, she was bathing nearby, we chatted, then got a drink, one thing led to another…”
“I don’t know how it is, honestly. Never happened to me before. I usually have to chase them with a harpoon or something.”
“Ya just gotta smile more ofter bro,” Jimmy said and flashed his amazing smile. “Anyway, she’s some bigshot manager or something. She really likes me. Like, really-really likes me. She told me she wants me to go with her to her niece in France or something.”
“Nice. Nikaia in Greek. It’s a gorgeous Mediterranean city in France,” the user corrected his friend, but there wasn’t any trace of mockery in his voice.
Jimmy the Amazing opened his can of beer and recalled his conversation with Bibi, staring idly. He pointed at the user and sipped deep. “Yeah. Yeah, that makes more sense now that you mention it. Nice the city. Do they have lifeguards there? They must have, right?” He whispered, “she’s loaded bro. Like millionaire. Like a one with a million after it.”
The user rubbed his chin and said wearily, “Now that you mention it, I have a favour to ask…”
He told his friend about the financial situation he was in, and that he would show up to work tomorrow morning and beg for a shift at the construction site. Jimmy had already visited him at the clinic and had seen the extend of the damage to his body, there was no need to embellish things at all. He was in no better financial condition than Leo, but the weekend was still far away so he wouldn’t have blown it all on partying and booze yet.
“Sure thing man, whatevs. I’m here for you,” [email protected] said and rubbed his strong chin.
He went dead serious. “There is a price though. I can’t just hand you the money, you gotta earn it for yourself.”
Chapter 7:// Paying back
The PAN was abuzz.
walkmand> I don’t get it.
rfid> CF02032533139342DFDC1C35
armd> It’s crystal clear. Our beloved user wanted a testament of my superiority in arm-wrestling.
parrotd> Ok. I can understand that. Man has always had a fascination with machinery. But what about the rest?
The daemons metaphorically looked up at the row of photographs [email protected] had posted up only minutes before. The first one was of the two men, sitting across on the table, doing arm-wrestling and the user clearly beating the life-guard in strength.
The rest were like this: the user with a “Vader” black helmet, angrily choking the air and the life-guard struggling for breath on his knees. The user with an outstretched hand, a mean face, and the subtitle, “talk to the hand.” The user and his friend next to each other doing a “Vulcan salute,” whatever that was. A 6 sec video of the two headbanging with metal music in the background and doing a gesture with their hands. And on and on.
armd> The user loves me.
walkmand> I provided the soundtracks!
parrotd> Shut up everybody.
No one did.
Chapter 8:// Calling on
Back in the cafeclnc wifi the datarate was still low even though there were barely any users this time of day.
Leo the user checked the email he got from the Apollo Clinic. It said to come pick up his dog. It wasn’t actually his dog, but he had had to claim ownership for them to perform surgery on the poor creature.
parrotd> The user needs instructions!
httpd> Coming, coming. This connection is slow.
The clinic’s instructions popped up on his veil, in his field of vision. He was to walk around the back of the building, where they had brought in Aibo, his newly acquired responsibility.
The user saw the instructions but looked towards the cafeteria.
parrotd> Did he crash?
armd> No, he is hesitating again.
parrotd> Must be a processing speed issue. Was there any head injury in the patient file?
walkmand> Oh, he wants to see the girl [email protected]! I’ll give him a tune.
A rap song with the words, “Go for it” in angry repetition blasted the user’s ears. He took a step forward, then another. A nurse blocked his way and stared at him for a minute but it didn’t deter him. He went to the cafeteria and looked around.
She wasn’t there.
The user slapped his forehead and looked at the time. Her shift must have ended. He did a u-turn and headed around back to get his dog.
Chapter 9:// Checking out
Around the back of the clinic was an employee, who was tired and yawning constantly. The user showed him his ID and swiped it on the man’s device. He presented a tablet with terms and conditions, the user scrolled down at the bottom and signed with his fingerprint. Then the employee asked for a check-out fee and the user swiped his paycard with the money he borrowed from his friend. He picked up the key to the cage and stepped outside in the chilly afternoon.
The user whistled and hopped a bit as he sang to the tune of “Who let the dogs out.”
He stopped in surprise when he saw the waitress from earlier, sitting by the cage, snacking on her dinner.
“Who… Em…” he said eloquently.
“Oh hello!” she said, her stuffed cheeks turning into a cute smile. She covered her mouth as she chewed down.
The veil showed her social media presence, the one he had seen before. [email protected] seemed to be a sweet ordinary girl who wanted to visit Spain someday. A perfect match for a blue-collar construction worker with no real prospects or career to speak of?
Not really.
But, to his luck, he had a dog.
“Hey, I saw you earlier right? No Mayo guy,” she said and pointed at him, putting her meal down on her lap.
“Yeah, that’s me. No Mayo guy.”
eyed> This is going horribly.
fingerd> She doesn’t like our user’s mayo? Let’s feed her some more, maybe she’ll change her mind.
armd> *snort*
eyed> I got this.
A picture of his dog popped up on his veil. The user shook his head, remembered what he was here for and said, “I came to pick up my dog, Aibo.”
[email protected] pointed at the plate in the cage next to her and said seriously, “You can’t do that yet, we are still having lunch he and I.”
The user hesitated. “Oh, OK then. I’ll come back later.”
He took a step back and almost turned around.
She giggled. “Come join us you silly!”
The user walked close and petted Aibo. He licked his hand and then went back to slobbering his dinner.
Aibo was a brown mutt, one of those uncharacteristic stray dogs that roam around the streets. He was friendly and quiet. He had been hurt extensively, with cybernetic replacements in both his front legs, his chest and half his face. He looked like a borg. A dorg? No, let’s not call him that, it’s horrible. Aibo was an irrelevant name before but now was ironically fitting. He was still a fuzzy pet underneath all that, a living being.
“I come around the back sometimes and bring the pets some leftovers from the kitchen. They don’t stay long, this is a humans-only clinic. The veterinarian one is at the other side of the city,” she said and snacked small lady-proper bites instead of the gulps she did before.
The user sat next to her and said, “Yeah, I know. They moved him to do the surgeries elsewhere. He was brought a few hours ago for me to pick up. So, here I am, picking him up,” he jingled the cage key. “After you two finish your dinner, of course,” he added.
“Such a gentleman, Mister No Mayo.”
He didn’t know his name. She wasn’t wearing any glasses, and she mustn’t have had the eye implants that Apollo Medical has advertising everywhere. He took in her eyes, they were a lovely shade of dark green. If she had access to the veil, the Shared Augmented Reality that overlai
d public information over anything and anyone, she would have seen that the man talking to her was [email protected], his workplace, recent photos (yes, the embarrassing cyberarm ones he took with Jimmy a few hours ago), and any other info Leo had let public like the important one at this moment, that he was single.
But now, he had to actually exchange names like in the olden days.
“I’m Leo,” the user said.
“Nice to meet you, I’m Katerina,” she smiled.
“I know,” Leo said, and regretted it. He tried to explain his stalkiness away, “These eyes, they are veiling automatically. I don’t even know if there’s an off switch yet.”
eyed> How rude! I’m shocked. Shocked, I say!
Katerina was bothered for a second but then sighed, seemed to accept that explanation and carried on talking. “I don’t like the tech much. I’m not a purist or anything, I just think that we should use it only when it is absolutely needed, like your arm for example,” she said and pointed, Leo becoming aware of it and feeling embarrassed. “Or your dog, sure, the poor thing was in horrible shape, it’s marvellous that you could help him recover. But not the other stuff, like adjustable shape penises or glowy boobs and such…”
Myth Gods Tech - Omnibus Edition: Science Fiction Meets Greek Mythology In The God Complex Universe Page 16
