Evie smiled and replied, “Thank you. It is very beautiful.”
“You should have a dress made of it.”
“Oh no! We are here for you.”
“But this would look marvelous on you. It goes perfectly with your eyes.”
“But I…”
“Oh come on! I am having it made for you.”
Before Evie could protest further, Grace was talking with the linen draper about it. Evie did not feel comfortable. She could not afford it on her own and did not want The Duke to be responsible. It did not seem appropriate. Grace then grabbed Evie's arm to head off to the haberdasher for trimming.
Chapter 13
Summertime meant plans of travel. Thaddeus had some associates with whom he needed to meet. Outside of that, he must see to it that his sister make her way about the countryside as well. Thaddeus began to sort out the details in the midst of his other affairs, all of which were not to do with business.
On one night he found himself in the company of a young woman with whom he had been speaking for some weeks. They had come upon each other at the home of one of Thaddeus’ distant relations, one of the more tolerable branches of his family tree. From the first, Thaddeus had been curious about her and she seemed to share in his curiosity. Idle talk turned into determined plans for future correspondence.
Lady Charlotte was a woman whose intended had been struck down in tragic fashion. It seemed that her future plans were being renegotiated by her parents without much of her input. She felt lonely and dispassionate about what lie ahead. Thaddeus thought she might prove to be pleasant company.
The two had arranged to see one another at some society gathering at which the Duke would not otherwise have been seen. They kept their acquaintance discreet, not daring to be seen too closely together. Lady Charlotte was doing some traveling, which her parents hoped would resolve her melancholy. It gave her the necessary free time for rendezvous.
Lady Charlotte had been escorted into the city and was staying in a set of rooms alongside the family of an uncle. Thaddeus was to be about town overseeing the acquisition of goods to be redistributed by one of the family's recently acquired businesses. It had been agreed that he should make his way to Charlotte's rooms afterward. He was aware that she remained in a state over the young man she had lost. It was Thaddeus' hope that she may still be able to provide some decent company.
Once he had completed his official business he was driven to the apartments wherein Charlotte's family were staying. With the assistance of his foot man, The Duke was able to make his way inside unobserved to where Charlotte stayed in wait for his arrival. He was then able to enter her room, where she had been able to secure her solitude.
She had advised him that she told her family that she was feeling ill and could therefore not join them in the night's activities. Thaddeus found her dressed in an understated gown, only lightly powdered. She exuded nervousness, yet Thaddeus was sure it was not her first time in such a manner.
All the same, Charlotte sat at tea, saying, “I know that you can understand my plight. You too have lost someone dear to you.”
“Yes. It is very difficult indeed. I am sorry for your suffering.”
“It can be too much to bear. However do you make it through?”
“I find that with good company the suffering is not so acute. Perhaps I may be of some assistance to you.”
Thaddeus moved closer to her, placing a hand gently on hers in comfort. She stared down at it as if she was searching for something. Thaddeus then drew her into an embrace, placing a hand gently upon her back. At their close range, he could smell her scent and it reminded him of the soft, flowery scent worn by Evie.
He tried to put the fight away as they spoke together softly. Charlotte was looking for comfort, he for pleasure. He indulged her need for intimacy, being as gentle as possible. In exchange, she allowed him to get closer. He did not move too fast as to cause her to shrink away. He wanted to maintain her confidence. She laid her head intimately upon his shoulder. At that point, he placed a hand delicately on her face, sweeping her hair to the side. He then slowly moved to place his lips softly onto hers.
Initially she did not respond. She did not move away, but she also did not answer his kiss. She simply kept her eyes tightly shut. As he drew back slightly and then again placed his lips onto her he felt them move against his, beginning to participate. He kissed about her face, trying to melt any resistance before it got the chance to form. He held her body against him, feeling a slight quiver as his caressed her arm and waist.
He removed his lips, poised to speak her name and hopefully one and for all solidify their intimacy. He paused just before his whisper, feeling the name Evie form upon his lips. He gave his head a subtle shake before whispering, “Charlotte.” In his mind crashed the images of two women: Abigail and Evie. He was careful not to betray this to Charlotte. Withdrawing himself as quickly as he could. He thought heavily as he departed.
He provided for her the touch of a man to rival that of the one she so wished to know. He was able to generate enough pleasure to overcome his own tightly wound yearning for a woman that he could not have; both the one dead and the one living. As he traveled away from Charlotte in the darkness, returning back to the safety of his own halls, he lapsed into a silence in preparation for the dreams he knew would either bring him comfort or torment.
He often found in his sleep some reverie of a time spent with his beloved Abigail. He could clearly see her alabaster skin, the slow rise and fall of her breast, the soft pink of her lips, and the delicate curl of her palm as it rose up to caress his face. Sometimes they would simply lay in what felt like an eternal expanse, until he had his sleep interrupted by the morning wakeup call of his steward. Other times either Abigail would fade away or he would get the sense of some other presence, one he fought desperately to keep from Abigail’s eye. He could not tell who it was, but it was a woman, standing just outside of view, haunting him.
The following morning, Thaddeus awoke from such a dream, rising up to face another day. It was a light day and no sooner than it had begun had he decided that he would not be leaving the grounds. He felt as if he needed a reflective day without the usual distractions. He followed his usual morning routine, which led him to the dining room for breakfast.
He entered just as Grace and Evie were coming in. They both greeted him brightly, he returned a distracted reply. They each settled down into their chairs. Grace and Evie spoke animatedly, apparently there was an upcoming affair of great import and excitement. Thaddeus may have heard of it, but he was not yet ready to think about anything in particular. He allowed the delicate buzz of his unfocused mind to warm him as he was served his coffee. Once he settled himself with a few sips he said, “What is it that you two are talking about?”
Grace replied, “The affair at Haddington Park. Everyone has been talking about it. It is said to be the event of the season. Surely you plan to come.”
“I had not yet planned for it, but it sounds as if I may be obligated.”
“It shall be an affair to remember. I cannot wait.”
Thaddeus nodded faintly and continued to eat his breakfast. Grace eventually went off to have some discussion with her maid. Evie dawdled behind. Thaddeus was aware that she was staring upon him intently and move his face into her direction. She looked slightly alarmed. After a moment she said, “I should like to speak with you about something of a delicate matter.”
“Yes? What is it?”
“Well, as you know, Grace and I recently went about getting her some dresses for this summer.”
“Why yes, I received the bill.”
“While there, Grace insisted that she might get one for me also. I realize that it is not proper and should like it to come from my income. I do apologize.”
“It is quite alright. That will not be necessary.”
“But…I do not wish to take advantage.”
“I assure you that you are not. In fact, it is probab
ly more proper that you do retrieve dresses in keeping with Grace. You shall be escorting her about and it would be unfortunate if you were not in keeping with the other ladies. Have Grace’s maids send for more proper attire for the upcoming season.”
“Oh that is far too kind. Really, I could not accept.”
“If you are to continue on as Grace’s steward there are certain appearances that you are to maintain. You are after all representative of her when you all go on from here. I must insist that you look the part.”
Evie looked to be speechless. It was clear that she had entered the line of conversation expecting to be reprimanded. She was not prepared to be rewarded. Thaddeus did mean his words, but he had to admit that he quite looked forward to seeing Evie in the latest fashion. He knew that she would look beautiful and could not keep himself from insuring that she be at her best. He would not pretend with himself that his motives were not selfish, no matter the outward logic that he applied.
Evie seemed to be struck speechless and quietly excused herself. Thaddeus wondered vaguely if she would follow his instructions. Anyway she would see to it that some member of his staff, be it steward, valet, or footman, would see that his instructions were followed. He got up from the breakfast table and made his way into his study to read over his correspondence. He found a letter from Sarah’s parents with a formal invitation to come to dinner soon. He also received an invitation from Phoebe to come and dine with she and Martin.
The remainder of the day passed along in a blur of normalcy. The only turn was when his steward came to him and asked about the landscaping. It was to be his first summer without Abigail and it had not occurred to him that he would need to oversee the finer details of maintenance. He could not even begin to contemplate his options and therefore left the finer points to the steward and gardeners.
Thaddeus felt himself sinking into somewhat of a slump. He could not quite place what was afflicting him. It may have been some effect of his grief, still not fully expressed, or perhaps some other emotion hitherto unrealized. Either way he found himself walking down by the lake, contemplating to himself. He came upon Evie, who was seated upon a bench not far from the edge of the water. She was staring into the water, unseeing. She jumped as he came nearer. Thaddeus said, “Excuse me.”
“Oh no, excuse me. I was just deep in thought.”
“As was I. It seems to be one of those days.”
“Yes, the changing of the seasons can bring about contemplation.”
“I suppose you are right. Do you mind if I sit?”
“Oh no. Of course.”
Thaddeus took a seat beside her on the bench, a bit closer than need be. For a few moments, they each stared towards the water. Evie broke the silence saying, “I want to thank you again for the idea for the gowns. That is very lovely of you. Far too kind.”
“Really, it is nothing at all. If Abigail were here, I would have needed a full suit of new gowns.”
There was a beat where he thought on this. It was so odd all of the things that could be missed in a person’s absence. There was no end to the things in which would no longer be necessary with Abigail gone. It brought him a pang of sorrow to consider it. Out of the cloud of his thoughts he found himself wondering aloud, “What will this summer be like without Duchess Wellington?”
Evie moved to place a hand on his and said, “I am sure it shall be quite difficult. I do pray that you find solace somehow.”
Her hand remained atop his and for a time he became aware of only the feeling of her touch. It brought him back out of his thoughts and fully into the moment. He dared not to move as not to displace her hand. After a few more moments, however, she removed it herself.
A rash of words sped to Thaddeus’s tongue, words he knew he should not say. He kept his mouth closed, not daring to open it and risk betraying himself. He would have liked to hold Evie’s hand and tell her what it meant to sit with her in that way. He would have liked to sweep her into an embrace and close the space between them. His every impulse seemed dangerous, he could not trust himself to remain in his space.
Instead, he regained himself, saying mildly, “Nonetheless, we shall need proper attire for my brother's impending nuptials.” He tried to effectively change the mood. Evie's expression remained one of concern. She went on, “Yes. Well, thank you again. I should be going. I believe Lady Grace has added more travel to her plans.”
Evie left the lake, leaving behind an uncomfortable silence. Thaddeus lamented having lost his composure in front of Evie. There was something about her that evoked emotion that he did not wish to express. That was how it had been with Abigail. In most capacities, he remained solemn. He was stoic and proper. As a youth he had been considered incorrigible, often unserious.
However, once he had grown up and particularly once he married Abigail he took on the formality of a Duke. Proper decorum was an earmark of nobility. Being emotional was far too common for one in position. Yet with Abigail, his laughter had been grand and even at times his sorrow. With just the two of them it could not be helped. She had been a safe place like no other before her had been. He could not even begin to think of Evie in such terms. She was a member of his staff. He simply must not forget that.
Thaddeus got himself up and decided to handle his affairs. He needed to regain the solemnity of one in his position. He would venture out into the city and join his fellow Lords for raucous debate and other more manly gestures of status. He knew how the season could get to others and he would not succumb himself. He thought about finding the company of a lady, one of more liberal sensibilities who would giggle too much until she faded into low murmurs of secret pleasure. As he passed from the lake, he walked through the cloud of fragrance Evie had left behind. He knew he must take his leave before he allowed the storm of desire building within him to spurn action.
Chapter 14
Following their meeting by the lake, Thaddeus and Evie spoke with much more frequency. They would cross paths at different areas of the manor and stop for a short chat. For Evie, those chats became her favorite parts of the day. She had never been in such an informal association with a Duke or any man other than her father.
They would find themselves keeping company in the drawing room, on the terrace, or along the grounds. She found that Thaddeus was to be found in the manor more and she was happy to see it. With Grace more frequently visiting either family or friends elsewhere, she had more time of leisure. That time was being filled with engaging conversation.
She was still not completely comfortable with the manner of which she and the Duke engaged. It did not seem proper. While they simply talked, it was the way in which they talked that had her convinced that she may be acting improperly. The Duke did not seem so self-conscious, but she was aware of his lack of formality in such manners.
It seemed that she was not alone in the enjoyment of their conversations. He seemed to be of much better humor than he had been before. It put her in the mind of Grace’s descriptions of him when Abigail had still been living. She thought perhaps he simply needed some acquaintance with whom to express his more common place thoughts. As far as she knew, the only other person with whom he spoke regularly beyond business was Lord Martin. Yet correspondence by letter could not compare to a simple face to face. She was glad to be of service.
One afternoon when Lady Grace was actually to be found lazing about the house, she and Evie took to the music room. Grace had good form at piano and Evie began to accompany her in song. Lady Grace played an elegant sonata as Evie sang along. Evie did enjoy singing and was often asked to do so when about those who were familiar with her. She would so often become engrossed in the music and close her eyes, communing with the accompanying instrument.
On this day, she was taking away by Lady Grace’s expert play. When she had sung the final note, she opened her eyes and there stood Thaddeus. A blush moved down her cheek and she said, “Excuse me. I do hope we were not disruptive.”
Thaddeus replied, “Oh no
! It was very lovely. I wanted to listen. Do not let me interrupt.”
Lady Grace interjected, “We are done. I have letters that I must complete. Excuse me.”
Lady Grace took her leave, leaving Evie standing beside the piano and Thaddeus just inside of the door. He moved inside saying, “I did not know you had such a beautiful voice.”
“Thank you very much. I do so love to sing.”
“Is it what you do when you are about friends?”
“Yes, I am often asked to accompany my sister Lucy who is quite accomplished at piano as well.”
“I took piano as a youth. I also played violin. I’ve always found music to be enjoyable, although I have long since lost the time to make it.”
Thaddeus sat down at the piano and began to play. In spite of his proclamation that he had not done so in a long time, he was quite good. He expertly moved his hands about the keys, not missing a single note. Before Evie knew it, she was singing along, taking up once more. She was so entranced she did not noticed until the final note had left her mouth that Thaddeus was no longer playing. He sat there staring at her and she once again felt embarrassed. She felt that she needed to quite the room at once. She cleared her throat and said, “You play beautifully as well. If you will excuse me I have some correspondence that I should also return.”
Regency Diaries of Seduction Collection: A Regency Historical Romance Box Set Page 10
