by Gina Austin
Nick sat down and prepared himself for another one of his captain’s speeches.
“You decided on another solo act again. You broke protocol by running into a burning building, confirmed reports of top floors losing stability, not waiting for a ladder and not taking your partner with you. Explain yourself.” Captain Miller asked calmly.
“Pardon me Captain, but aren’t we here to save lives?” Nick replied sarcastically.
“You’re kidding me right? That’s all you got for me?”
“As far as I’m concerned I was doing my job so I really don’t understand why we’re even having this discussion.”
“Then allow me to refresh your memory, a month ago you jumped between two buildings and you didn’t even have a safety line tied around you, two weeks ago you had 15 min. left in your air tank and you stayed in that warehouse until your partner threatened to report you, now he didn’t so don’t go blaming him, I’ve got my ways of finding these things out myself. And then today’s stunt.”
“Captain, I made the decision to go back into that building and it was mine alone to save that little girl!” Nick argued back.
Speaking powerfully now, Captain Miller yelled, “You don’t have the authorization to make that decision. I make that decision and you never ever tell your partner to stay put when he’s there to back you up. Every fireman in this company works as a team; as one. Did you ever stop to think that the floor would have given out on you? Did you ever stop to think of the men whose lives could have been lost if I had sent them in after you?”
Nick knew the captain was right, he should’ve waited for the trucks aerial ladder and never have gone in alone. The captain wasn’t done yet but what he said next took Nick by surprise.
Lowering his voice, the captain asked, “Gates, do you want to die? Do you want to end your life and join Amy? Is that it?” Nick was angered by the captain’s questions and he looking deeply into his eyes said, “You’re getting personal captain; let’s keep the topic on what happened today.”
“You still haven’t answered my question?”
“No Captain! I’m not trying to kill myself.”
Continuing in his composed manner Captain Miller pointed out, “Are you aware that the actions you’ve been taking the last few months since Amy died are painting a different picture for me? You can’t sit there and tell me your done mourning for her. You can’t sit there and tell me you’re not a changed man because of her death. You need help Nick.”
“Look captain I’m sorry about what I did today. I won’t break protocol and I won’t do anything without my partner ever again.”
“It’s not enough. Nick you need closure with regards to Amy. It’s affecting your performance on the field in a big way. I’ve lost one guy under my command Nick and in my book that’s one too many. You need time to heal and I need to know that I can rely on you 100% and right now I don’t.”
“Come on Captain, don’t do it.”
“You’ve left me no choice. You’re suspended until further notice.”
Chapter 4
The evening had finally come for Liz and Joe to join Susan and Tom for dinner at Susan’s place. It had only been one week since the girls had their night out and turns out that Tom’s client had postponed the presentation meeting for a later date. Needless to say Liz was completely excited to be seeing her best friend a week later, at the same time getting to know Tom a bit more. Susan was still working on her laptop when Tom knocked on the door. “It’s me.”
“Come in, it’s open.”
“Hello sweetheart.” Tom flashed Susan a bouquet of flowers, which meant he was heading out of town. “Hi. Going somewhere?” Susan asked.
Tom answered, “I’m heading out to Phoenix on Monday. I have a strong feeling they’ll be closing the Maxwell deal pretty soon and when they do sweetheart this is going to be so huge for us.”
“Home in Tinley Park, here we come!” Susan said excitedly.
“Are Liz and Joe on the way?” Tom asked.
“They should be here in about 20 min. which gives you and me the right amount of time to finish setting the table.”
“Wow, pushing it to the last minute, aren’t you Susan? I thought you would’ve had the table set by now.
Susan narrowed her eyes towards Tom’s not appreciating his remark and said, “No worries, just give me a hand.”
***
Passing the vegetables over to his wife Liz, Joe said, “Arizona is amazing Tom. If you get some downtime you should go white water rafting while you’re there.”
“Doubt I’ll be there long enough to try that. Though it sounds a bit dangerous to me; besides I like calm water, like the hotel pool.”
Liz said, “Well in that case you’ll have to come down with us to the Bahamas in the spring.”
Tom gave Susan a look requesting her assistance to get the conversation on a different topic. “Spring is going to be a difficult time for us with work and all.”
Liz had a disappointed look but quickly rebounded by asking Susan and Tom, “So did you guys set a wedding date yet?”
Liz was looking to have a wonderful time tonight however her main goal for getting together this evening was to study Tom and get a sense of whether or not he was the right man for Susan.
Susan looked over at Tom waiting for his response to Liz’s question. Tom uncomfortably responded, “Well uhm… we’ve discussed a two-year plan.”
Joe chuckled, “Two-year plan huh, that’s spontaneous.” Liz laughed but smacked Joe on the arm anyway.
Tom continued explaining all the while looking at Susan to make sure there was no disagreement from her part, “Well the first year were focusing on our careers and the second year on the wedding and then on the house.”
Joe said “That sounds like a plan.”
“Speaking about plans, we have to confess some plans of our own.” Liz said.
Susan had a surprised expression and held her breath while Liz said, “We just bought a house!”
Susan exhaled in relief as she thought Liz was going to say that she was pregnant. “House! Outstanding! What part of town?”
“Right here in Logan Square.” Joe said.
Tom spoke disapprovingly, “Oh so you’re staying in town.”
Liz ignored Tom’s disapproving tone and said, “Yes they’ve got great families, schools and everything is just so nearby.” Tom and Susan’s iPhones started ringing at the table and both rushed to see whose was ringing. It was Tom’s and he immediately rushed away from the table to answer his call without excusing himself from his guests. Liz found that to be very rude on his part.
Focusing her attention back to Susan, Liz continued saying, “The neighborhood is like a small town tucked within the big city. You know what I’m talking about Susan. Aren’t you looking to buy house around here?”
Hesitant to answer, Susan said, “Tom and I are looking into Tinley Park.”
“Wow!” Joe said. “Would hate to make that mortgage payment.”
Widening her eyes in concern Liz asked, “What about your commute time? Or what if you’re called to report on a story here in the city? I thought you were happy here in Logan Square?”
Susan was feeling like she wanted to crawl into a hole right now she was so uncomfortable with how the conversation had turned out.
“I’ll just have to deal with the commute. It’s only 40 minutes to the news station and besides it’s what Tom wants.” Susan said.
Taking advantage for the moment that Tom left the room Liz asked, “But Susan, do you want that also?”
“It’ll be a nice change.” Susan answered.
Not convinced by her answer, Liz countered, “Can you and Tom afford Tinley Park?”
“That’s why we’ve both been so busy working overtime on our careers.”
“Yes but Susan is it all worth it?” Liz asked.
“It’s an excellent investment.”
“I agree but you’re already working so hard, I worry about
you.”
“Well, don’t worry.” Susan said with her phony smile that Liz recognized. As Tom walked back into the dining room to take his seat, Susan put her hand on his shoulder and said jokingly, “I’ve got Prince Tom to take care of me now.”
Liz smiled back but couldn’t ignore the feeling that Tom’s love for Susan was conditional to Susan only agreeing to what he wanted. Liz wasn’t convinced that Tom was the right man for her best friend. Liz hoped Susan would wake up sooner rather than later and realize that she deserves someone better than Tom. I wish she would break off this engagement, Liz thought.
Chapter 5
Nick was making himself a protein shake for breakfast when Mike was coming down the stairs of their house. Mike had moved in shortly after Amy’s death so Nick wouldn’t be alone. At the time it was a great idea but sometimes he wished Mike would move on and start living his own life.
When Nick stopped the blender Mike said, “Good morning big bro! What you got going on today?”
“Going over to visit mom and pop for a while.”
Mike was overjoyed to hear that. “That’s awesome! I’m glad you’re finally getting out of the house! I would go with you but I’m scheduled at the station today! Send them my love, will you!”
“Mikey, can you lower the volume on your enthusiasm. You know I’m not a morning person and I’m still trying to wake up.”
Mike sidestepped to Nick’s right side and whispered, “Gotcha, sorry.” Nick nodded at his brother ignoring his strange sense of humor. Mike crossed the kitchen to grab a bowl and spoon for his Special K cereal. While he poured some milk into his bowl, he figured he’d ask him now rather than later. “By the way since you’re starting to move around now and you’re actually speaking today, I thought it would be a great opportunity to ask you if can help me clean this place up?” Mike requested with puppy eyes.
Nick wasn’t cooking as much as he used to so the kitchen had pizza boxes and empty take out boxes of Chinese food. He had magazines and newspapers thrown around the living room and Mike couldn’t remember the last time he Nick use the vacuum cleaner. “I tell you what? I’ll start picking up around here when you start paying rent. Any other requests?” Nick said annoyed.
Mike’s eyeballs looked from left to right without moving his head and softly said “Not that I can think of. Love you too bro.” and then whispered “Have a nice day.”
Shaking his head and regretting his decision to allow Mike to live with him, he walked away from the kitchen and made his way upstairs to get ready to visit his parents.
***
“It’s good to see you son, come on in.” Mr. Brian Gates said. Nick gave his dad a big hug then followed him into the living room.
“Sorry your mom isn’t here but she went bowling with her girlfriends from church. She would’ve loved to have seen you.”
“It’s OK Pop. I should’ve called anyway.” Mr. Gates and Nick walked over to the living room couch and sat down. His father was genuinely happy to see his son and made no reservation in showing it. Smiling at Nick and studying him for a moment, his father asked, “So how’ve you been son? I heard about what happened in the firehouse.”
“No thanks to Mike I bet. By the way, he sends his love to you and mom.”
“Thanks. Now don’t go off on your brother next time you see him. He loves you and is just worried about you that’s all. He’s got your mother’s supportive nature so what do you expect.”
“And yours too, Pop.”
“I just didn’t want to speak for myself.” They both smiled at each other.
“So” Mr. Gates said wishing he could enter his son’s mind, “What are you doing with all that free time you’ve got in your hands? Other than watching TV and going for walks in the neighborhood at night.”
“Not much Pop. After seeing you I’ll just head back home to get some cleaning done.”
“Just don’t stay home by yourself for too long. Amy wouldn’t want you living a reclusive life. She would want you to be happy again.”
“That’s just it; I don’t know how to be happy again. I miss Amy so much. And I love her just as much today as if she were still alive. I can’t imagine ever loving anyone else.”
“I can only imagine what you’re going through son. Amy was a wonderful woman and your mom and I miss her dearly. However, I do know for certain that she wouldn’t want you to mourn her death for the rest of your life. Is that truly any way to live?
Nick didn’t respond. He just looked at his father and listened.
Mr. Gates shook his head from side to side answering his own question. “It’s not living Nick. And at some point, you’ll have to let Amy go so you can live a life full of happiness.”
“How do you do that, Pop? How do you let go of someone you love?”
“When you love someone, that love doesn’t die when they do. That love stays in your heart forever. But you have to say goodbye to the life you shared with Amy so you can begin a new life. A life filled with happiness.”
“I can’t say goodbye to Amy.”
“Maybe not today or tomorrow but at some point I believe you will. Nick, you don’t want to waste your life being married to your grief. No good will ever come from. You’ll just be torturing yourself and you’ll become an old grouch. I’ll have to start calling you Ebenezer Scrooge.”
Nick chuckled as his father’s joke and said, “I hear you pop. I’m just not ready.”
“One day you will. I have faith in that.” Leaning over to put his hand on Nicks, Mr. Gates continued saying, “And when that day happens, I’ll see that joy beaming from your face. I’m proud to call you my son and nothing in this world can take that away from me. You’ll be fine.”
Nicks heart felt lighter after hearing his dad’s kind words. “Thanks pop. I appreciate that.”
Resting his back on the couch again Mr. Gates continued, “On another note, your mom and I are heading down to Florida for a 5 day Caribbean cruise. Since you’ve got some free time on your hands, you’re more than welcome to join us?”
“Thanks Pop. You and mom have a great time but I’m hoping this suspension the captain put me under isn’t going to last much longer. I want to be ready when he calls.”
“Well if you change your mind just give us a call.”
Nick smiled and nodded his head yes.
“In the meantime, how about a game of chess with your old man?”
“Sure.” Nick said.
Chapter 6
After watching the evening news it was Nick’s time to get out of the house and go for a walk. He enjoyed the walks because it allowed him to clear his head before he went to bed for the evening. It also gave him an opportunity to think about the conversation he had with his dad earlier that day.
As he headed down Sacramento Avenue, he was saddened to see that the café shop he and Amy used to frequent was going out of business. Nick thought, I’ll have to go there one more time before they close their doors for good. I wonder if they still have that carrot cake Amy enjoyed so much.
As he turned the corner, he saw Palmer Square Park. Walking by the 3 city blocks of serene undeveloped park, he thought about evenings he and Amy would walk the park while fresh snow would powder the landscape. The memory bringing a smile to Nick’s face, he recalled his earlier conversation with his dad, but you have to say goodbye to the life you shared with Amy so you can begin a new life. A life filled with happiness.
Nick thought, how do I even do something like that? Feel like I would be betraying her memory. Realizing that every turn he took was reminding him of Amy; he decided to walk down Albany Street. Knowing that he never ventured down this street before wouldn’t bring up any memories of Amy.
***
Susan was listening out for any news worthy stories on her iPhone using a recently downloaded app called Emergency Radio. In the news industry, if someone’s bleeding or in mortal danger, that would be a leading story in the newsroom. Susan believed that big breaking exclusive s
tory would happen one day. Unfortunately that wouldn’t be tonight because Susan’s favorite show was about to begin. Perfect timing! She thought. Just in time to watch Dancing with the Stars!
Grabbing the remote to her 54” Sony LED slim screen TV, she tuned into her favorite show and laid down on her modern white leather sofa. While watching TV she thought what fun it would be to take ballroom dancing lessons. I wonder if Tom would be up for it.
During a commercial break, Susan went to the kitchen to make some Chamomile tea, her usual routine before she went to bed. Hearing that the TV commercials were still being shown she thought, I hate all these commercials. I really need to get a DVR so I can just record my shows and skip those annoying commercials.
