Canadianity

by Jeremy Taggart

  Hockey legend Hayley Wickenheiser and I connected on Twitter and she said the Calgary contingent could mobilize quickly—they had things figured out after the devastating Alberta flood of 2013. As if I didn’t already think she was the very definition of Canadianity. I love her.

  Slowly things were coming together. I set up a charitable pool at Aeroplan called #GetMeBackFromFortMac where folks could donate their miles.

  We were managing. Booking and buying tickets for those in need. But they just kept coming. “It’s me, my two daughters, my best friend and her son.” Story after story. All legit, all worthy, all complicated.

  It was also becoming clear in the days that followed just what a big undertaking it was going to be to get Fort Mac back on its feet again. There was major widespread damage. Even the optimists were starting to realize they wouldn’t be back to work for quite some time. So they emerged from shelters and friends’ houses, wondering about the possibility of getting help with tickets home.

  By this time, most of the flights out were overbooked and our miles stash was dwindling.

  Then rocker Joel Plaskett donated 200,000 of them.

  Gat dang, I love this country. There were concerts and bake sales and offers of cottages. Even the politicians seemed to be getting along. It’s the oldest clich-eh that tough times bring people together, but boy, it’s true.

  In the end, we booked more than fifty flights back to the East Coast for stranded Fort Mac fire victims. I was really proud, mostly of this great country and how we can come together in times of need.

  Two weeks after we booked the last ticket, I got an email from one of the people I’d booked a flight for early on. He needed to get back out to Fort Mac. Work had called him to come clean up, but he didn’t have the means. I used the last of the points to score him and another guy tickets back out there.

  Months later, I bumped into Rick Mercer at a CBC fall launch function. He told me his mother had asked him if he planned to donate miles to help people get home from Fort Mac. In typical saucy fashion, he explained to her that if he donated his miles, she’d never get to go anywhere.

  Man, he’s funny.

  Microphonies

  A game we called Microphonies asks the question, Which of the following is a real cover band? Let’s start with good Alberta boys Nickelback.

  1.Poor Man Stealin’ (Nickelback)

  2.Are We Them (R.E.M.)

  3.Runs in Your Hoses (Guns N’ Roses)

  4.Björn Again (ABBA)

  5.AC/DShe (all-female AC/DC)

  6.Counting Cornrows (Counting Crows)

  7.Non Jovi (Bon Jovi)

  8.Earth Wind for Hire (Earth, Wind and Fire)

  9.Fleetwood Mock (Fleetwood Mac)

  10.Posin’ (Poison)

  11.Oasisn’t (Oasis)

  12.Nearvana (Nirvana)

  13.Mandonna (Madonna)

  Numbers 1 and 6 are the microphonies.

  Alberta Gotta Do’s

  DESTROY fondue at the Grizzly House in Banff. Used to be a swinger’s club in the ’70s, as the table-to-table phones would suggest. So much unusual cubed meat, which you cook to perfection on a 1,000-degree rock at your table.

  SHRED Lake Louise on skates. The scenery is inconceivable. Skating outdoors there might be the quintessential Canadian experience. If it’s not, having a cocktail in the Chateau Lake Louise afterwards will be.

  CARVE fresh pow at Sunshine Village. The slopes are super-sick, as snowboarders who like alliteration would say.

  SADDLE UP and slap leather at Rafter Six Ranch, twenty-five kilometres from Canmore. Authentic cowboy experience.

  BIRLIN’ from Edmonton to Calgary and gettin’ a little peckish? Stop in to Old Mexico Taco Buffet in Red Deer.

  British Columbia: BC Bahd

  Bahd Bands

  Michael Bublé

  Trooper

  The Grapes of Wrath

  Econoline Crush

  54–40

  Skinny Puppy

  D.O.A.

  The Payolas

  Loverboy

  Five Notable Bahds

  Atom Egoyan. One of Canada’s premier film directors. Ever want to feel badly about yourself and the world? Watch The Sweet Hereafter.

  David Suzuki. Started raising red flags about the environment twenty-five years ago, before it was even part of the public consciousness. Still has abs in his eighties.

  Pamela Anderson. Got discovered on the big screen at a BC Lions game. What’s more Canadian than that?

  Kim Campbell. The first female prime minister in Canadian history!

  Rick Hansen. Man in motion! On his world tour, logged more than forty thousand kilometres in thirty-four countries to raise awareness and funds for people with disabilities.

  Birlin’ to BC

  Taggart

  I always have a good time in BC. The laid-back attitude in Vancouver is refreshing compared to the rush of Toronto. Between recording and a few relationships, I’ve spent a couple years there. It’s a total bummer when it’s raining, so that’s why I would find it tough to live there. The Noah’s ark vibe once a year takes a toll on the soul, but when it’s sunny and fresh, it can’t be beat.

  I spent a summer travelling Vancouver Island, driving around and pulling over almost anywhere and walking into a river oasis or jumping in a fresh lake. I spent a few days at Sproat Lake near Port Alberni—that place is ridiculous. It’s a huge, cross-shaped lake with a crystal-clear view all the way to the treasure trove of logs at its bottom. I’ll never forget diving off the dock and feeling like I was in some Avatar-level beauty under the water. I’m not a big swimmer, but I am when I’m there. Seeing the Martin Mars water bombers loading up and taking off was a trip too. If you’re ever on Vancouver Island, you need to visit that place. It’s retirement bait!

  Another amazing place is Duncan. I spent a day with the late Cowichan elder Simon Charlie, the legendary Salish master totem carver. He reminded me of Picasso, working tirelessly and with his shirt off. He was all about paying it forward, and it showed in his carving school. His estimated twenty-two truckloads of cedar logs carved is unmatched. He has totems standing in the Royal BC Museum, the Parliament Buildings in Ottawa and other standout venues around the world. The man was a true bahd! He was so happy to answer any question, and very eager to give carving tips. I couldn’t believe the character in his work. So much depth and personality in the carved faces. You get the feel of his totems and you can pick them out anywhere. Like a true master.

  Duncan is an incredible small town. You can feel the connection to the community from the totems on most corners and the friendly folk everywhere. Not to mention the amazing breakfast spots. Cheap too! I went for breakfast at the Arbutus Cafe with four people and it was, like, fifteen bucks all in. So good, bahds.

  So there are my moves for Vancouver Island. We all know how awesome Tofino is, but the whole island is full of gems. Get in there!

  Vancouver seems to be the place where most people are from somewhere else in Canada. Lots of uprooted bahds. It’s interesting how many musicians there are, yet there aren’t many clubs to play. More of a party club scene than bands. I used to spend a fair amount of time at the Roxy because you were guaranteed live music. I ripped it up there many times with the local bands, as well as with bahds rolling thru town. Jumping onstage with the fellas from the Trews, playing Band songs, or getting banged up with the Trailer Park Boys and Metric. Always a good time at the Roxy.

  I loved living in Vancouver while recording OLP’s Gravity album with Bob Rock. We were in the beautiful studio that Bryan Adams built. Great gear and people there—it was a perfect environment for making music. I spent a lot of nights at Richard’s on Richards back then because I was dating a bartender named Cat. She was super-cool, and I would go there after work most nights. So many amazing bands came there—Trail of Dead, Cat Power, Franz Ferdinand, the Walkmen and always the great Nardwuar hanging out, catching all the gold.

  I also spent a lot of time a
t the Commodore Ballroom, one of Canada’s finest live venues. That’s the place where I felt like we really made it when OLP sold it out in the early days. Amazing sight lines and that incredible floor built on tires so it has give when the crowd gets going. Bouncing up and down with the bands. Fantastic.

  The food in Vancouver is well beyond great, home of the best sushi in Tojo’s and the most sublime Indian food in Vij’s. Indian food is by far my favourite food on Earth, maybe because you can find a good place in almost any city. It’s always the safest bet if you’re unsure whilst abroad. Nothing sucks more than trying and failing when eating on vacation. There’s always a lineup at Vij’s because he doesn’t take reservations, but it’s worth the wait, bahds!

  Vantastic

  Torrens

  I associate BC with tranquility. Where else can you swim, sail and ski in the same afternoon? Vancouver is pretty and shiny, sprawling and new. The First Nations presence there gives it a depth and soul that’s never very far away.

  What I really like doing is getting out of the city to explore the coastline. When you grew up near the ocean, water makes you feel at peace, even if it’s not the water you grew up around.

  The cost of living there is so bananas it creates an interesting cocktail of humans. Old hippies and new money. New buildings, but old trees.

  We did a Jonovision road show there with headliners Gob. Remember those mafsks? Bunch of punks, in the greatest way.

  I have dear friends on Gabriola Island, and it’s the kind of place you feel like you could stay blissfully unaware of any problems in the world.

  Jason Priestley owns a hotel in Ucluelet. We stayed there when we went to visit my sister-in-law, who was working in Parksville. What a beautiful part of the world that is. Tofino too.

  The area has a relaxed gorgeousness, not unlike Jason himself. Hah. First time I met him was at an Anaheim Ducks game. I was there with Mike Smith (Bubbles), and Jason was sitting across the lower bowl with his lovely wife, Naomi.

  I was wearing a rugby shirt, and he text-dissed me from all the way across the barn. Something like “Hey, nice to see Torrens is wearing the Duran Duran ’80s Collection.” Long-range burn via technology. Nice.

  After the game they invited us back to their place to have a couple of drinks and chat. The Priestleys are gracious hosts, warm and inviting. Interesting and interested. Little did I know I’d end up working with him just a couple of years later on Call Me Fitz, the HBO Canada series shot in Nova Scotia that really showed his range as an actor.

  I guess that’s what I mean by relaxed. He knows he’s Jason Priestley and he knows you know he’s Jason Priestley, but he’s okay with being him and makes you feel comfortable knowing that. He’s also quite a Renaissance man. Great cook, knows a lot about wine, vintage car enthusiast.

  You might recall he suffered a terrible car accident during a charity race several years ago. The way he tells it, it was so bad that the EMTs said, “Well, we might as well make the trip to the hospital to say we did, but there’s no way he’s going to make it.” That might be why he’s just so happy to be here, on the planet Earth.

  It’s not often that you meet people with that kind of profile who are a genuine delight. Jason understands what so very few high-profile actors on a series do: that if a guest star or day player comes on the show and is funny, that makes the show better and him look better in the process.

  It takes security to know that. I was supposed to do one day on Call Me Fitz in season 1 and I ended up being there all four seasons. It was one of the most fun acting experiences I’ve ever had because all the actors in the cast were world class and forced you to up your game, like when you’re playing tennis against somebody better than you.

  And Jason set the fun, respectful tone on set, making everyone else fall in line.

  Anyway, if you get a chance, go stay at Terrace Beach Resort. ’Cuz it’s beautiful and ’cuz he’s a bahd.

  The Beachcombers

  Torrens

  When I was twelve I went to visit the set of The Beachcombers and was shocked to discover that the pie in Molly’s Reach was plastic. And that the restaurant only had three walls. And that Relic’s shed just housed a bunch of old ropes—the interiors were shot elsewhere. How could this be? The characters on this show, from Bruno Gerussi’s Nick to Jackson Davies’s Mountie, were so real, so believable and so Canadian, it was hard to accept that they were fictitious. All except Relic, who I still believe is real.

  Bahd Ambassador

  Rikki F.

  TnT resident episode cataloguer Rikki lives in BC and sent these our way when we asked for her suggestions. Talk about going a-bahd and beyond!

  •Blue Moose, 322 Wallace Street, Hope. This well-known local pit stop is an epic haven for coffee lovers, transients, local artists and live jazz musicians alike. The colourful moose-laden environment is spacious, yet cozy, and the food is freshly made in house. Overall atmosphere is friendly, diverse, delicious—much like Canada.

  •Yellow Deli, 45859 Yale Road, Chilliwack. Sandwiches, hearty soups/chili made daily in house, and incredible juices. The tiny shack has the feel of a log cabin, with massive slabs of tree trunks for tables. Perfect for starting off on a road trip, after a long shift at work, or just sheer curiosity towards the intriguing communeesque backstory of the Yellow Deli.

  •Hilltop Diner, 23904 Fraser Highway, Langley. This gem first opened for business in the ’40s to service a roadside motel on the same property. Since then, not much has changed. The greasy dive is well known for its phenomenal in-house pies, homely decor and foot-tall burger.

  •Honey Doughnuts & Goodies, 4373 Gallant Ave., North Vancouver. Tucked away in Deep Cove, this doughnut shop has a constant lineup out the door and is well known for its calorie-filled, homemade doughnuts delivered warm and powdery to your piehole.

  •Tomahawk, 1550 Philip Avenue, North Vancouver. The original Tomahawk opened in the ’20s, oftentimes trading meals for First Nations artwork and artifacts. This breakfast joint is a staple for any foodie. The atmosphere highlights the history of the First Nations peoples in the Capilano area and serves up some of the tastiest, greasiest grub you’ll find.

  •Anton’s Pasta Bar, 4260 East Hastings Street, Burnaby. Anyone who’s anyone has crammed carbs into their gut at Anton’s. This family-friendly restaurant is known for its massive servings, its ninety-minute lineups out the door and for presenting a pen to any patron who finishes their meal.

  •FreeWheelin’ Records, 33707 Essendene Avenue, Abbotsford. This mom-and-pop record store is completely classic Canadianity. Owned by a couple in their sixties who work side by side with their massive dog, this is a staple for anyone interested in new or used vinyl. They also carry a variety of music-related biographies and books, as well as glass art. Wifey keeps a notebook with handwritten records of each sale, with your name so they can greet customers by first name and recollect their musical tastes/preferences.

  •Krazy Bob’s Music Emporium, 20484 Fraser Highway, Langley. Krazy Bob lives up to his name through his inability to spell, to say no to any potential merchandise for his floor-to-ceiling-stocked store and to engage in verbal banter with customers—poking fun and crossing the line without fail. He is one of the strangest characters you’ll ever meet, yet is brilliant at the same time. From VHS to vinyl to cassettes to CDs to random figurines, games, books and iconic pop-culture gems, Bob’s hoard-fest is a must-see paradise for music lovers.

  •Stawamus Chief, Squamish. Unquestionably, one of the best hikes in BC. This seven-kilometre quad-breaker essentially takes you straight up, utilizing ladders, chains and the natural landscape to bring hikers atop three separate peaks, overlooking the provincial park, the community of Squamish, Mount Garibaldi, the Pacific Ocean and dozens of surrounding islands.

  The Price of Friendship

  Torrens

  Sometimes when you meet high-profile media types, it’s a disappointment. There’s no way they can measure up to the high hopes you have fo
r them.

  Shelagh Rogers of CBC Radio fame is not one of those people. Somehow warmer in person than she sounds on the radio, she is funnier than you’d ever imagine and even, on occasion, a little bit saucy. When she is, it’s thrilling.

  The strange thing is she sometimes took heat from the public for being phony. Or sounding it on the radio anyway. No one could possibly be that warm, folks would say. She’s too gushy, they would say. Boy, are they wrong. She actually is that warm, that kind, that gushy. It’s like her every nerve ending is open to experience. She actually does feel every little thing and cares that deeply about people.

  Which, for my money, makes this story that much better.

  I’ve never really felt like part of the establishment, such as it is in Canadian show business. It might be because of geography. The East Coast is such a remote part of the country that we feel disassociated from what goes on in the rest of Canada.

  It sounds a bit crazy, but there actually is an adjustment period whenever I leave the safe refuge of the sticks for the bright lights. It might be because I didn’t grow up that way, with the flash, dash and cash. Still, the odd time I find myself in big, strange rooms with fancy folks and wonder how I got there.

  One such evening was a benefit for the Walrus magazine a few years ago. Don’t get me wrong—super-nice people, just not my typical weeknight event. My dear friend Jenny had an extra ticket, and I really enjoy her company. We knew our mutual friend Shelagh would be there and we wanted to support her.

  The event was a silent auction of messages in a bottle, with handwritten notes donated by everyone from Desmond Tutu to Bill Clinton. Cool.

  There was only one live auction item, and it was a dandy: five predictions for the future, handwritten by Margaret Atwood, in a crystal decanter. The live auction was emceed by the aforementioned and adored Shelagh Rogers.