by ERIN BEDFORD
Moving from the living area, I walked into his bedroom where the door had been thrown open by the shadows. The door still lay open and against the wall, it’s hinges barely holding on. I chewed on my lip as I moved further into the room.
I let my hand trail along the comforter on Chess’ bed. One that I had never slept in and never would. I picked up his pillow and pressed it to my nose, inhaling deeply. It smelled like him. The hole in my chest ached, and I had the sudden urge to roll around in the bed to engulf myself in his scent.
Before, I could do it, Alice’s voice called out, “Lady? Are you here?”
Clearing my throat and placing the pillow back where it belonged, I called back, “I’m in here.”
Alice appeared in the doorway with Hatter in tow. Her eyes scanned over me, worry pinching her face. The look in her expression silently asked me if I was all right. All I could do was nod my head as I stepped away from the bed.
“Let’s get this over with.”
After my mother decided to test my restraint with her dodgy answers, she had finally told me what I needed to know to close the hole. Apparently, it was like any other kind of magic, except that I wouldn’t be able to do it alone. The strain on my own magic would be enough that it could kill me, so I would need a conduit to help me focus the power on the task at hand. That was where Alice and Hatter came in. They would act as my hands to help keep the magic in check while I shoved as much force as I could at the sides of the hole. It would be a long and tedious process, but it could be done.
How the hell the Shadow man had done it so easily was beyond my comprehension. Then again, most of the stuff I knew about the shadows was wrong. I wouldn’t be surprised to find out that they had survived and were in the Shadow Realm just waiting for their chance to break free once more. Which was all the more reason I needed to figure out how to close the hole so I could get to the Shadow Realm and finish what I started.
“So, this is going to suck,” I started as I led them through Chess’ home and out of the willow tree.
We stood before the hole, the white of the Between almost blinding in contrast to the rest of the area. Alice stood on one side of me and Hatter on the other. Taking a deep breath, I tried to settle the nerves that had begun to inch up my spine.
“What do you wish of us?” Hatter asked. His gray eyes looked at Alice and then back to me. If he was as nervous as I was he didn’t show it. Alice, on the other hand, wrung her hands in front of her not able to hide her feelings as well as her lover.
“I need you guys to help me control my magic while I force the hole to close,” I gestured to the edges of the hole in question, “I have enough power to do it on my own but without a buffer of some sort I could get caught up in the magic and drain myself dry.”
“It sounds pretty dangerous. Are we sure we want to do this?” Alice asked. Her face filled with apprehension.
Did I want to do it? No. Did I have a choice? Not really. The hole needed to be closed before someone got hurt, and no one else besides Chess and I had enough power to close it. My mother probably could have done it, even Mab, but it would have drained them so much that they wouldn’t have recovered. Thus the half-breed had to do it. Wasn’t it always that way?
“It’ll be fine,” I said to Alice, though I could tell by the look she gave me that she knew I was full of shit. I only said things like it’ll be fine when I didn’t want her to worry, but there wasn’t anything I could say to make her feel better. It had to be done, and we were the ones to do it.
“Very well,” she sighed and then asked, “What should we do?”
“Just stand there for now. I’m not exactly sure how this will work. In theory, when I start using my magic to close it you need to use your magic to keep mine on target.” I explained and then added, “If I start looking like I’m going to go over to the dark side knock me on my ass, got it?”
“With pleasure,” Alice replied a bit too happily. The glee in her eyes at the prospect of hitting me was disturbing at best. It made me wonder what kind of person I was living with. Maybe it was time for some roommate therapy.
“Just follow his lead,” I pointed to Hatter who I trusted more than Alice not to get me killed. I shook my hands and focused my attention on the hole and then asked, “Ready?”
“As we’ll ever be,” Hatter’s solemn voice replied followed by Alice’s gleeful, “Ready!”
“All right, here we go.” Even as I said the words my magic began to build up inside me.
It was happy to have a job, joyful even. It had been kept under lock and key too long. In the last six months, there hadn’t really been any need for it. The shadows were gone, and I didn’t have to use my glamour anymore. Daily activities usually included being a buffer between other Fae and dodging my mothers’. I didn’t get a lot of time to practice, nor did I need to use it for household chores. I will admit; I did use it to get the remote when I was too much of a couch potato to get it, but other than that it had been very much kept dormant.
The magic almost knocked me off my feet as it rushed to the surface, and even Alice and Hatter’s eyes widened a bit at the force of it. I quickly grabbed a hold of it with my hands, mentally stopping it from flying forward without a purpose. I then directed the magic toward the hole.
In my mind I was taking hold of the edges of the opening, pulling it inward as I imagined what the space should look like with it gone. Thinking about the hole being gone didn’t make it so, my magic fought against me, not wanting to do as I asked. I pushed against it, my actual hands coming up in front of me as I tried to push the edges closed.
Beads of sweat dripped down my face and the effort of it made me think that I still needed to join a gym. The muscles in my arms bunched up and burned at the strain the magic was causing as it whipped around in front of us all carefree and defiant. It was like bench-pressing a truck. A truck with a mind of its own and it was saying no way in hell was it touching that hole.
“What’s wrong?” Alice finally asked after a few moments. “Why isn’t it working?”
“It’s being a pissing little shit is what it is,” I bit out between clenched teeth. “It’s pissed I haven’t used it in a while and making me work for it.”
“What can we do?” Hatter asked from the corner of my eye.
What could they do? I watched my magic as is swirled and jerked, trying to move any direction but forward. What I needed was a sheep dog that would keep it on the right path, but I would have to settle for the two Fae next to me.
“Use your magic to create a barrier on each side,” I started, straining to talk as I fought with my own powers. “This way it will have no choice but to go where I want it to go.”
“It shall be so,” Hatter answered, his eyes turned to liquid steel as he became focused. He held his hands out on either side of him for what I could only assume was to call his magic, because moments later silver white energy began to flicker along his palms and wrists. His eyes locked with Alice’s who had been standing there in awe. “Your turn, dear.”
Alice blushed and slowly lifted her hands as well. With more effort than it seemed to take Hatter, Alice concentrated on something off in the distance. Her brow scrunched down, but nothing happened for a moment. Then as if something clicked, a pale blue energy glowed on her palms. Her eyes lit up as she glanced down at the light and then back to Hatter and me.
“I did it!” she cried out with such happiness it made me worry.
“Have you never manifested your magic before?” I asked, trying to keep my focus on the task at hand but worried about her experience in the matter.
“No,” she shrugged, “I haven’t had the need to, but do not worry, I as the humans say, got this.”
My lips pursed at her confidence, not trusting her abilities. Unfortunately, it was too little too late. I didn’t have a choice in who helped me, because the magic I had called had to go somewhere and it sure as hell wasn’t going back inside of me.
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“Fine, follow his lead and no funny business.” I nodded to Hatter, the strain of my magic causing my words to sound breathless.
Hatter nodded at Alice and gave her a reassuring smile. “Just watch me.”
He lifted his hands until his palms were facing toward where my magic was doing a silly dance regardless of my effort to contain it. Hatter forced the glowing energy from his hands to create a barrier, forcing the green tendrils of magic to move away from his side and come at Alice full force.
She cried out as she quickly put her hands up as well, her magic shoved at mine. Her side wasn’t as solid as Hatter’s though, and it poked at her trying to find some way out. Thankfully, her barrier held up as well as Hatter’s, so it was easy for me to push the magic forward and into the sides of the hole.
Inch by agonizing inch, the hole moved slightly inward, causing Alice to yip, “It’s working, Lady! Look!”
“I can see that,” I bit out as I struggled to make the hole smaller. Each inch was a battle in itself, and I could feel it in every muscle of my body. Using so much magic, while tiring, was an exhilarating rush. Each pump of magic I pushed out of myself took its place, making me feel full of power. Invincible.
The moment the word came to mind I shook my head. No. I couldn’t think like that. I had to get this hole closed.
Whenever I became high on magic it meant I was getting close to my limit. The magic wanted to keep going, even if it meant draining my well dry and using my life force in its place. My magic was a double-edged sword. While it could help me in many ways it could also kill me just as easily. Probably why I didn’t use it as much as it would like me too.
Finally, the last inch was closed, and I cut my magic off with a sound snap. It fizzled out having lost its purpose but not before lashing out at me and landing me square on my ass.
Chapter 7
Kat
I DON’T KNOW how space travelers do it. Opening and closing portals between worlds was not easy work.
By the time we got the hole closed my entire body was sticky with sweat from the effort. My whole body ached, and I felt as if I had just run a marathon on one foot. Something that I wouldn’t do even if I had ten legs. Running should only be done when someone was chasing you, or when there was a sale on my favorite midnight snack. But not in any circumstance was it done for fun.
“I don’t know about you guys,” I started bending at the waist as I heaved in in a few breaths. “But I am going to take a hot bath and call it a night.”
I turned from the newly closed hole and started back toward the willow, but Alice stopped me with a touch of her hand. In achingly slow motion, I turned my head to raise an eyebrow at her. Ugh. Even that hurt.
“I was wondering,” Alice started, her face quickly turning red as she glanced down at the ground and then peeked over her shoulder to where Hatter stood waiting. “If you could maybe…”
One thing most people learn about me quickly was that I was not a pleasant person on the best of days, and when I was tired and disgusting, I had no patience for anyone. So it took all my effort not to shout at Alice for her dallying and to tell her to spit it out already.
“If I could what?”
She shuffled her feet and looked at the ground again, the shy and uncertain Fae was not a side I was used to seeing. She seemed to gather her courage and quickly said, “If you could stay at Chess’ tonight so I can be alone with Hatter?”
If I hadn’t been listening very closely I would have missed it. Her words came out altogether before she took in a heaving breath and waited for me to answer, anxiety making her form stiff.
Thinking about it for a moment, I didn’t know what to say. I mean, I’d had a roommate before; it wasn’t uncalled for to ask to have a little privacy with your loved one. A little play action without interruption but what Alice was suggesting wasn’t something I had ever planned to do.
“Why can’t you go back to his place?” I peered around her to peek at Hatter who seemed to be pretending to not be listening in on our conversation.
“Well, you see the thing is,” she giggled wringing her hands nervously. “Hatter kind of has a full house at the moment. There are plenty of Fae who have come over to the human world and those who have gone home to their families. But there are some who have lost family members to the shadows, and they are too scared to go back home, so they have kind of congregated at Hatter’s. Making it not really the ideal place to…well you know.” She gave me a knowing look.
“Fine. Then I’ll just go stay at my mom’s,” I said moving toward the willow again before her voice stopped me again. “What now?” I spun on my heel and snapped at her.
“I think, I mean,” she glanced back to Hatter, “we think it would be good for you, to stay at Chess’ place.” Alice walked up to me placing her hands on my shoulders. “Don’t pretend like we haven’t noticed you dragging through life. You don’t sleep well, and the only time you visit Chess’ grave is when you can’t stand the ache you feel in here.” She poked the middle of my chest where the hole pulsated at the mention of it.
“I don’t know what you are talking about,” I muttered looking away from her and to the ground. “I’m fine.”
“The heart is not so easily healed or so easily hidden away just because we wish it to be so.” My eyes darted over to where Hatter stood, his arms over his chest as he nodded solemnly. I didn’t know what to say. His words rang true for me but at the same time, I didn’t want to admit them, especially since I had just recently heard Chess’ voice when passing through the mirror. I suspected mentioning it now would not do my case any good.
“Why don’t you stay here tonight?” Alice suggested again. “It might do you some good. Help you to move on.”
“You know Mab says they aren’t really dead.” I couldn’t help but bring up. I wasn’t the only one who couldn’t let go and try as I might to move on, the damn cat kept bringing me back in.
Alice pursed her lips not happy with my words. “She’s a grieving mother. Of course she would hold on just as much as you would, but Lady…Katherine,” she shook her head sadly her blonde hair whipping around her, “they’re gone. They aren’t coming back, no matter how much you want it. So why don’t you take a bath and have a good cry and then in the morning you will feel better. I promise.” She gave me an encouraging smile that I only half returned.
“If you say so.”
“I know so.”
* * *
AFTER ALICE AND Hatter left to have their little night in, I waited around outside of the willow. I was delaying the inevitable, I knew that, but going back in there was too hard for me to handle after I used so much energy. Happily in denial, I moved over to Chess’ original throne, the vines on it were wilted and dried, unlike the beautiful ones that had covered it the first time I had been here. Things had changed so much since then.
It was hard to believe not even a year ago I was a smart mouthed human thinking I knew everything while making my way through what I thought was Wonderland. Now, here I was a half-blood and the Seelie Princess to boot. I scrubbed a hand over my face and let out a bitter laugh. All I had wanted back then was to get home and away from that perverted cat, and now I would give anything to have him here again. Maybe Alice was right. I needed to surround myself with Chess’ stuff so I could finally let him go.
Not able to convince myself to delay any longer, I moved toward the entry to the willow tree. Placing my hand on the bark, I let myself be enveloped in the magic of the tree. Stepping through the bark and onto the lush unicorn barf carpet, I let out a deep sigh. I wondered if he had any food around here, and if so, was it any good anymore?
I maneuvered around Chess’ house searching for the kitchen and something to fill my empty stomach. Who knew closing tears between worlds would make one so hungry? I’d have to remember that for the next time it happened. I just hoped there wasn’t a next time.
As luck would have it there was some
food still in the kitchen. Some weird prepackaged food that didn’t have an expiration date but was similar enough to chips that I decided to chance it.
Lounging on one of the fur covered chairs; I munched on my snack and tried not to go cross-eyed from the decor. What exactly was I supposed to do now? It wasn’t like he had a television set or any books that I could see. How exactly did he stay entertained here?
The last thought made me pause. Oh yeah. I frowned hard. I had forgotten what Chess’ extracurricular activities included before he met me. Before he became my Chess he was little more than a man whore, taking on male and female Fae alike as payment for his service to the crown. Just thinking about it made me sick to my stomach.
My eyes moved toward the bedroom door where the bed was visible from my seat. Had he taken them there? How many had he had in his bed? A large lump filled my throat and I fought to swallow it as I shook my head. No. Don’t think like that. I didn’t want to remember him as a certifiable prostitute. He wasn’t like that with me. He was funny and kind. Even when he was supposed to be working for my mother he had always put my wants and needs first. It was one of the reasons I had fallen for him so easily.
Dusting my hands off, I stood from the chair and moved to the bedroom. Bypassing the bed with a sideways glance, I beelined it for the bathroom. I opened the door and closed it behind me; even though I was the only one here I still didn’t want to take any chances. People could still come and go as they pleased here. The last thing I wanted was to be caught naked by a stranger; it was bad enough Alice didn’t understand the meaning of the word privacy.
As soon as the door was closed behind me, my eyes went straight to the claw foot tub. I let out a longing sigh. Chess had a bathtub I could only dream about. The one at my grandmother’s house was a standard tub that barely let me fill it up enough to cover my boobs and that was only if I was laying down flat. This tub, though, I could easily sit up on the side and have a nice luxurious bath fully covered and all. Just the thought of it made me relax a bit.
