“Nothing, we went to Hanson’s tonight and with you, Landon and Lane missing, it felt off.”
“Why wasn't Lane there?” I wonder. Landon is back on his second deployment, but I didn't take a bullet for Lane’s girl so he could stop living.
“Who knows! He and Mallory are probably fucking and he forgot! I'm telling you Gav, I will never be a one-pussy man. Ever!” He boasts and I laugh. My brother has probably slept with half of the single ladies in Chicago and the surrounding areas. But even he knows he is lying to himself. I think all of the Stone men are looking for that mythical creature that our dad and uncles have warned us about. None of us kids believes that there is the perfect woman waiting for us to find them, but all of us hope there is.
We continue joking for over an hour and it's just like old times. He must notice the change in me because he says with a hint of both sadness and relief, “Looks like Kentucky is doing you some good. For the first time in a long time, I hear my brother.”
There is so much I want to tell him, my brother and I have always been close and have shared every part of our lives with each other. I so badly want to tell him about Nicola, but how do I explain what's going on between us when I don't even know. He would probably just make fun of the situation, making some crass sexual joke. For some reason, I feel protective of Nicola. So I simply reply, “I'm trying.”
Eli clears his throat a couple times, “I know! Well I'll let you go to bed. Catch up soon.”
“Alright, kiss mom for me and tell her and dad I miss them.”
We hang up and a new wave of emotions hit me. My whole life I have felt blessed to be a “Stone.” My parents adopted me when I was four years old. I always loved hearing the story of how my dad rescued me. I know they probably put the fairytale spin on the story but still it has always made me feel loved.
“Your mommy got very sick when she had your brother. And the doctors said we couldn't have any more babies. But little did we know we had another son waiting on us. The moment your mommy saw you she knew you would be forever ours. You were so smart and so protective of your little brother. You completed our family.”
Later I found out that my biological parents were in and out of jail, but I never felt connected to that part of my past. I was a Stone and I wanted nothing more than to make my parents proud of me and to show them I did belong. God, are my parents going to be proud of me? I know my dad will shit when he sees all my tattoos and my mom will freak out when she finds out I work security at an old folks bar. She owns eight businesses that I could work or own if I wanted. But if I am not a cop, I need to figure out who I am, without any help from my mom.
Chapter 10
Nicola
I'm a hot mess tonight. I haven't worn makeup in years, but after last night, I have a little pep in my step.
Jean eyed me suspiciously and then nodded her head towards Gavin. I did my best to act casual, but the color of my cheeks betrayed me. I wasn't lying… technically. Gavin shouldn't be my type, but I’ll be damned if he's not flirting with me of all people. Although in this bar, he’s limited to very young, very married, or very old ladies, so there really isn't a middle ground other than the one I’m standing on.
I’m not bitter about it, maybe Gavin and I can be each other’s trial run before either of us get into a relationship with someone who suits us better. Even the thought sounds silly to me, and maybe a little too good to be true that Gavin would be up for ‘practice’ with a middle-aged mother. Well shit Nic! There goes the pep in your step!
Suddenly I have the urge to go scrub all of this junk off my face, instead I decide to scrub the bar and hope Gavin doesn't get close enough to see that I’ve tried today.
I’m about halfway down the bar when I look up and see him standing at the other end of the room staring at me. I turn away quickly; I don't want him to see my thoughts or my overdone makeup. I quickly run a finger over each eyelid, hopefully making the makeup look less obvious. He strides over with a smile on his face. He places his calloused hands on the edge of the bar, skimming them towards me as he moves closer. “We’re still practicing tonight after closing, right?” he asks.
“Unless you have a hot date with your girlfriend.” I tease him, hoping to find out one small detail along the way.
“Well, I’m going solo at the moment so I guess you’re my hot date for the evening,” Gavin chuckles as he pushes his hands deep into his pockets and rocks back on the soles of his shoes and I can't help but laugh too. It's been a long time since I've been comfortable enough to let my guard down.
With that little pep in my step returned, I turn back to the few patrons sitting at the wooden bar. I'm watching the clock in agony, counting down the minutes until we close. It's going to be a long night.
Gavin
I can’t deny it; Nicola looks hot as hell. Don’t get me wrong, she's beautiful even without makeup but there’s a special type of confidence she’s wearing tonight along with it. She’s smiling, laughing out loud even, and I’ll be damned if my dick isn’t standing at full attention.
Before driving to work, I stopped to pick up flowers for our ‘first date.’ Now that we've closed for the night, I let her know I need to run to the car to grab a change of clothes. She was busy counting out the cash register, so it's giving me the time to think and to second-guess myself.
Am I ready for a relationship? I only wonder because Nicola doesn't seem the type of girl who wants a quick fuck. Not that she would deserve to be treated as a booty call even if she allowed it. Maybe this is a bad idea. Even though I can feel the old Gavin rumbling underneath the surface, I’m still lacking his sexual tendencies.
Fuck it, we’ll just let it ride for now. I'm gonna leave it to Nicola to set the tone of our encounters. I grab the bundle of long stemmed roses out of my backseat and head towards the door to the bar.
She’s scrubbing down the far right end of the bar top when I walk back in with the roses and she stops mid-wipe to stare at me with confusion. I walk towards her slowly; feeling both foolish and excited as I count the number of steps it takes for me to be standing on the other side of the bar in front of her. Besides my mother and my aunts, I've never given flowers to a woman before.
Sitting them on the bar in front of her, I say as nonchalantly as possible, “I got these for you.” For a second, I second-guess myself. What if she’s turned off by the nice guy? What if she wasn’t turned on in the first place? Fuck it. This feels right.
She clears her throat multiple times before finally uttering a single word, “Why?”
“Because we got to talking last night about first date questions and I figured now is just as good a time as any.”
Again, she asks, “Why?”
“I don’t know Nicola, because it’s what adults do when they're interested in each other.” I state matter of factly.
“But I'm much older than you. Seriously I'm not your type.”
I almost want to roll my eyes. Insecurities are the biggest turn off, any other time I would turn and walk away without a second thought, so I'm not sure what drives me to take a seat.
“We need that date before you can actually know what my type is. So, can I pour us a drink while we sit and talk about it?” She nods her head yes and I exhale in relief.
“Thank you for the flowers, they really are beautiful Gavin.”
“I’m glad you like them,” I set down two glasses and turn up a bottle of whiskey, filling both of them. The glug of the liquor filling the glasses is the only sound in the room.
Nicola breaks the silence, thankfully, “Are you a local? I haven’t seen you around.”
“I'm from Chicago. Born and raised,” I answer her question as simply as possible.
“What about you? You from around here?” She looks like she is also contemplating her answer and I know her answer will mirror mine in its detail.
“Not really. My parents moved a lot, but my mom was from here. I always remembered this town as being quiet, hidden al
most. That’s what drew me here.”
Puzzled by the way she answered my question, I speak softly, “You're an awfully hard person to get to know Nicola.”
She lets out a dry, humorless laugh and replies; “I could say the same thing about you Gavin.”
Returning the same laugh I assure her, “Trust me, my life is rather boring.”
“Now you're just lying,” she nudges my arm playfully.
“Fair enough, It’s rather boring now, maybe not so much before.”
“What did you do in Chicago?”
“I was a cop. Or technically, still am a cop for the Chicago P.D.” I hate where the conversation might be headed but if one of us doesn’t give up some information, we’ll be stuck here all night. Usually I wouldn’t mind, but this isn’t the kind of all-nighter I’m trying to pull.
Nicola burst out laughing immediately, “What's so funny?” I’m intrigued.
“Oh man, I had you pegged for a runaway criminal.” She laughs loudly and throws her head back in amusement.
“What gives you that impression?”
“I don’t know, the gauges in your ears, a new tattoo every week, your ‘I don't give a shit’ personality.” She fires off reasons one after another but she's telling me more than she thinks.
“So, I guess you’ve been checking out the new additions.” I smile, satisfied that she’s been looking at me just as much as I’ve been looking at her.
She stops smiling and turns beet red, but responds quickly, “Well I mean, it's not like I have anything else to look at in this bar.”
Her eyes find mine and I can't fight kissing her any longer. Standing up from my chair, I take a step towards hers and push her chin up with my finger until she’s looking me in my eyes with a bit of uncertainty.
She isn't stopping me, but she looks like she might want to. I ignore her reaction and close the gap between us, softly touching my lips to hers. At first, I’m unsure how she’ll react but my mind is put at ease when she pulls me closer, grabbing onto the back of my neck.
It's not the same kind of lusty, passionate kiss you expect for the first time, but as our tongues slowly move around each other, I know this kiss is just as intimate.
Nicola pulls away, shaking her head. I use the moment to take a breath; my mind is going in a million different directions.
“Gavin, we shouldn't,” she whispers, turning away from me.
I can tell from her tone that she means it and I have to ask, “Why, Nicola?”
“Because you're you and I’m me, and even though I really needed that kiss, this will never work.”
We’ll have to work on her insecurities. Before I head towards the exit, I lean down and kiss her one more time fully and passionately. When I pull away she sits still for a moment, lips still damp as she clears her throat. I feel her body heat almost pulling me to her, but her facial expression doesn’t match.
“Nicola, don't tell me what I want. It really pisses me off.”
She doesn’t say another word as I walk away and close the door behind me. I pull out my keys to start the quick drive home. I check the clock, it’s late and I'm exhausted. She's exhausting. That kiss was really something though. It tells me that we share chemistry, but everything else tells me that I should leave her alone.
Chapter 11
Nicola
Never in my life have I been kissed like that. When Jason and I first started dating, I loved to kiss him but I don’t ever remember a time when I felt one of those kisses in my panties. I was lost in the moment and if Gavin hadn't been a gentleman, I wouldn’t have stopped him. In this instance, I felt a need to release all of the tension that has been building up for the last eight years.
Even though I could’ve easily and thoughtlessly gone further, I'm glad we didn’t make the situation more complicated. He's still young enough to want kids, I have to assume he does want them, as he didn’t answer when I asked the other day; but Allison is it for me. She’s my life and I’m not willing to budge on that. Gavin keeps saying I don't know his type and I can tell I'm getting on his nerves by insisting that I do. But the day some hot, young tanned-up Barbie walks through the door and smiles in his direction, he’ll realize I was right all along.
I was shocked to hear he is a cop. What kind of cop gets all this time off work? Maybe my assumption of a criminal isn't too far off. He could've been put on leave pending an investigation, though something now inside me says Gavin is good. Great! More questions I want answered. I’m relieved I was wrong about the criminal thing.
Tonight I’ll do the right thing and put a stop to whatever it is that’s happening between us and hope that he can settle on just being friends. His presence isn’t one I’m willing to lose, but I have to keep my head on straight. For Allison.
“Mommy?” I hear her tiny voice outside my door.
“Come in here baby,” I call and she opens the door and walks over to my bed.
“I couldn't sleep.”
“Why’s that baby girl?”
“I heard something outside my window.” She whimpers fearfully, standing at the foot of my bed and I pat twice on the empty space beside me so that she’ll come lay beside me. As she curls up, I breathe in the scent of the baby shampoo that lingers in her hair and I pull her closer to me.
“It's probably those old raccoons again.” And I’m sure that’s what she heard, but I tense up and replay the moves Gavin and I worked on in my head.
This nonsense with Gavin has to end. My daughter will always be my first priority and instead of coming home to her, I’ve been wasting more of my time messing around. As I run my fingers through her hair I whisper, “We're safe baby. I promise.”
Gavin looks irritated tonight, not once have I caught him staring in my direction and I can't help but wonder if it's me he's trying to avoid.
I'm not sure why it's bothering me, especially now that I’m trying to put him further out of my mind. Maybe I'm lying to myself about not wanting Gavin. I have a long list of reasons why we shouldn't be together but there’s one nagging reason why we should that I can’t seem to shake. My heart has opened to him, slowly, and now I can’t seem to find a way to let him go. Not all at once. Gavin wouldn’t hurt me in the ways that Jason did, I can see the kindness in his eyes. If I jump into something, there’s no turning back, and three people could end up hurt in the end. For my heart’s sake, I have to fight these feelings.
Gavin
Eli called earlier to warn me that Lane and Mallory are on their way here. I tried calling both their cellphones to beg them not to, but every time I called, it went straight to voicemail.
Eli’s been telling me for a while now that Mallory blames herself for my running away and I've assured her more than twice that it isn’t her fault. But I guess she doesn't believe it, so now I have to relive that night to ease her mind.
Searching to keep my mind off what awaits, I decide to go to the shed and gather bottles to restock the bar. Once I get outside, I hear my old friend Mr. Nicotine calling from my back pocket. Not that second hand smoke isn't already filling my lungs with every second that I spend inside that dingy, old bar, but I just can’t ignore the urge.
Mindlessly, I light up a cigarette and spend a few seconds just watching the smoke from both the cigarette and my cold breath dance in the chilly air. It's almost distraction enough, as I pick up three cases of beer to take back in.
I’m listening to the sound of my shoes crunching on the gravel, not paying any mind until the door to the bar opens and I catch a glimpse of red hair sitting at the bar and my stomach drops.
Son of a fucking bitch! I set the beer down on the table right inside the door as I pull it open and make my move to drag her out of this bar. I'm going to punch Lane at least one good time for letting her come here alone.
Before I’m able to get to her, I see Nicola point to me with a quizzical look on her face and Mallory immediately jumps from her chair and comes at me faster than I’m able to stop her.
She leaps into my arms and starts to sob uncontrollably, “I’m so sorry Gavin.”
I ignore her pleas and ask as nicely as possible, “What are you doing here Mallory?”
“Eli told Lane that you knew we were coming. I was afraid you wouldn't come home tonight and I really need to talk to you.”
“I'm going to fucking kill Eli,” I spit out, not directly at her but I might as well have.
I can see in her crumpled expression that I've hurt her feelings and I feel shitty for it, but I need her to leave. I grab her hand and lead her just outside the door.
“Mallory, please go home. I'll be there in a couple hours.”
“Alright... Gavin?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you blame me?” she asks, her voice laced with sorrow.
I take her by the arms, hoping to convince her once and for all, “No Mallory, not once have I blamed you.”
Nicola
I'm standing here tapping my non-slip shoe, waiting for Gavin to waltz back in. When that gorgeous redhead came in and asked for Gavin, I felt my stomach drop. The way she said his name was with familiarity and I can only imagine how he might know her. They’re not related, this much I know for certain. Another thing I know for certain is that if she’s his type, there’s no way on God’s green earth that I am too.
I decide to go grab the cases of beer off the table where Gavin set them, when he walked in and was so quickly swept away by the mystery redhead. If I happen to overhear anything that's not my fault. I wouldn’t be eavesdropping; this building’s walls are just paper-thin. No, I won’t stoop to that level, I assure myself, but as I hear their voices continue on I can’t help but walk over to those beer cases.
I take my time picking up the first box when I hear the girl say, “I miss you Gavin. Please come home. I love you.”
I'm frozen in place, anxiously awaiting his response when he says quickly and without a second thought, “I love you too Mallory. But please go home, I’ll be there after we close down and we can talk about this.”
Gavin (Made From Stone Book 2) Page 5
